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   “Amy, are
you okay?” Dillon asks between breaths.

    “It
feels so good,” I breathe out.  I wrap my arms tightly around his neck
again and press myself into his bare chest, wanting to feel the heat of his
body on mine, skin to skin.  He quickly captures my lips with his and I
can’t keep up with him this time.  He thrusts his tongue in my mouth aggressively,
sending my hips into a frenzy.  Our skin is hot, our bodies slick with
sweat.  I grind myself down on him hard, trying to satisfy this
uncontrollable need building inside me.  I have to break the kiss to
breathe, but our lips remain touching while catching each other’s heavy
breaths.  My eyes lock on his and I gasp as my muscles start to contract.
 I pull him tighter to me and still myself as something starts to happen.

   “Oh God.”
 I can’t move.  My body stiffens and my thighs squeeze around him as
the intense ache between my legs intensifies.  He thrusts his hips and
digs his fingers into my ass to rub against me desperately. He’s so hard.
 He groans as he holds me against him and we both begin to shudder.
 “Oh God.”

    “Let
go Amy.  Let it happen,” he whispers into my lips.

    He
thrusts his hips into me one more time and then it happens.  I completely
come undone.  “Ahhhhhhh……oh God…oh God…..oh God….”  I’m clinging to
him, every part of our bodies touching as my body convulses and my breathing
becomes labored.  He tightens his arms around my back and holds me until
he feels my body start to relax.  My muscles turn to jello.  As I
come back to myself, I wonder if what we just did was normal for him.  I
feel a little less sure of myself and bury my face into his shoulder.
 “I’m sorry.” I say still trying to catch my breath.

    “What
are you sorry for?” he whispers into my hair.

    “I
don’t know what I’m doing.  I’m not like other girls.”

    He pulls
my head off of his shoulder and cups my face while he gazes directly into my
eyes.  “No.  You’re not like other girls.  You’re different than
any girl I’ve ever met.  It’s a good thing Amy.  And you don’t have
to know what you’re doing.  It’s a feeling.  Just feel it.”

    “I
definitely felt it.”

    His
face breaks out in a big smile, dimples and all, and then he laughs at me.

CHAPTER 13

Dillon

    I
cannot stop thinking about Amy and me in the tree fort the other day.  I had
no intentions of taking things that far with her.  I didn’t think she was
ready.  As soon as she allowed me to touch her, I couldn’t stop. Her skin
was so soft and her body so responsive.  The noises that she made and the
way her body squirmed asking for more made me lose control.  I was waiting
for her to stop me and maybe even freak out, but she didn’t.  I came in my
fucking pants.  I’ve never done that before.  I keep asking her if
she’s okay and she assures me that she is.  I hope I didn’t push too much,
too soon.  I want to be with her again but I want to make sure she’s not
regretting what happened.

    I
feel like an asshole because of what happened with Candice.  I should have
talked to her a long time ago when I started to having feelings for Amy.
 We’ve never talked about being exclusive, but I’ve never been with anyone
else.  I know that Candice has been seeing other guys though.  I’ve
just been convenient for her since we hang out with the same group of college
friends.  We knew we’d never have a future together, it was always just
sex, but I should’ve stopped her.  Amy was on my mind and I was horny as
hell.  Candice crawled on top of me and I just couldn’t stop.  When
she screamed and I saw Amy standing there, staring at us, looking like she just
had an orgasm in the hallway, I came right then.  I came so fucking hard.
 That’s when I knew I had to end things with Candice.

    After
Amy ran to Laney’s room, Candice wouldn’t stop screaming about what a freak she
was and I just wanted to go to her because I knew she was probably thinking I
was angry with her.  I finally calmed Candice down and we were able to
have somewhat of a civilized conversation.  I apologized for not stopping
her and not talking to her about my feelings for Amy sooner.  She didn’t
take it too well, I knew she wouldn’t.  Even though Candice and I weren’t
even serious, and even though she dates around, she still doesn’t like to be
told that her favorite toy is no longer hers to play with.  She’s pissed.

    Amy
and I have been focusing on the work around the ranch.  There is so much
to do and having her help has taken a huge amount of stress off of me and has
helped her manage her stress as well. She’s been much happier.  She’s
still sleeping in Laney’s room, but I don’t think she’s actually sleeping.
 I think she’s reading all night.  She tells me that she doesn’t have
as many nightmares, but I think that’s because she tries not to sleep.  I
offer to stay with her, but she refuses to let me.  She says she keeps me
up all night and then I can’t focus on work the next day, which is true, but
she still refuses to take anything to help her sleep.

    After
we took care of the horses this morning, I told her to go relax for a while.
 I have to plow the fields before the rain comes this afternoon.
 It’s hot as hell and you can smell the storm coming.  The air is
thick with humidity.  I peel my shirt off of my back and slip it over my
head and then tuck it into the back of my pants.

    As I
ride the tractor through the field, I can see Amy sitting under a tree with one
of those books.  She’s curled up on a blanket with her knees bent to the
side and her short little skirt spread over her thighs.  The new clothes
she bought show off the sexy figure she had hidden under Laney’s baggy clothes.
Her hair is shiny and soft, blowing around her in the wind.  Every once in
a while, a strand lands across her face and she has to tuck it back behind her
ear.  I watch her read intently, biting on her lip now and then.
 Sometimes she stops reading and puts her hand on the book, making sure
she doesn’t lose her page to the wind, and then she stares off and gets lost in
her thoughts.  I know I’m doing a really shitty job on this tractor
because I can’t keep my eyes off of her.   Fuck it.

I drive the tractor towards
her.  She sets her book down and stands up.

    “Get
on!”  I yell over the tractor engine roaring.  She jogs over to the
tractor with the biggest, sweetest smile stretched across her face.

    “Can
I drive!” she yells.

    “Absolutely.”
 I pull her up onto the tractor and she straddles the seat between my
legs. I wrap my arms around her and rest my palms on her thighs.  “I’m
going to release the clutch, all you have to do is steer.  When you need
to stop, press the clutch down, shift the gears to neutral, here, set the
parking break and then slow the throttle like this,” I tell her in her ear.

    “This
is so much fun.  Where should I go?”

    “Just
drive. I missed you.”  I bite at her earlobe as she steers the tractor.
 She giggles.  I pull her hair over to one side as I suck at the soft
skin on her neck and rub my hands up and down her bare, spread thighs.
 The vibration of the tractor has her moving against my dick and I can’t
take it.  I move one of my hands up her shirt and cup her breast.

    “Dillon.”
 She just says my name.  I pause, waiting for her to say stop, but
she doesn’t.  I feel her heartbeat pounding under my hand and I know she’s
feeling everything I’m feeling.  I squeeze her and feel the weight of her
soft breast in my hand.  She keeps her hands on the steering wheel as we
creep across the field and she leans back and relaxes her body into my bare
chest.  I dip my hand underneath the underwire of her bra and softly
caress her nipple with my fingertip.  I can feel her heavy breathing.
 I move my other hand down between her legs and begin to stroke her over
her damp underwear. She starts to rock into my hand. Just then, I feel a rain
drop, and then another.  The clouds open and sheets of rain start pouring
from the sky.

    “Don’t
stop Dillon,” she pants.  With one hand on the steering wheel, she reaches
down and puts her hand on top of mine between her legs.  She pushes my
hand harder against her and moans.  Shit.  I kiss her neck
frantically and then suck her earlobe into my mouth, pulling at it with my
teeth as water drips off of her skin and her hair. I pull her taut nipple, now
wet and cold from the rain.  I stretch it and roll it with my fingers as
her wet shirt clings to my hand.

    I
drop my gaze over Amy’s shoulder to watch our hands moving under her skirt
between her spread legs, her body still rocking.  Goose bumps from the
cold rain break out over her skin.  She tilts her head towards the sky and
drops of water collect on her face.  Her mouth opens slightly, and her eyes
close as she moans over the sounds of the tractor and the thunder in the
distance. I feel her thighs tighten against my hand and her body bucks forward.
 It’s so fucking hot, I almost come in my pants again. I close my eyes for
just a minute to calm myself and when I open them, we’re heading straight for
the barn.

    “Fuck!”
 I pull my hands out of her clothes and grab the steering wheel and steer
away from the barn.  I eventually get my feet working to find the clutch
and get the tractor to come to a stop, and after a few deep breaths, we both
burst out laughing.

    “I’m
sorry. I suck at driving.”  She laughs.

    I
wrap my arms around her and squeeze her tight.  “I think you should drive
the tractor every single fucking day.”  I smack a kiss on the side of her
cheek.  “I’ve never had so much fun plowing a field in my life.”

    I
jump down from the tractor and hold my arms out for her.  She jumps into
them and wraps her legs around my waist and I kiss the hell out of her.
 The rain pounds down on us as we kiss.  It’s passionate and
aggressive.  I hold her face in my hands as she wraps hers around the back
of my head, pulling at my hair.  I spin her around until I can’t hold her
anymore and we fall to the ground, sinking into the wet grass.  We make
out like a couple of teenagers rolling around on the ground with our hands
exploring each other until we’re both covered in mud and shivering from the
cold rain.

    “Rain
or sunshine?” I ask her.

    “Rain.
 Definitely rain.”  She smiles.

    I
give her one last kiss before I pull her to her feet so we can head back to the
house to get cleaned up.  I glance across the field and laugh as I notice
the very obvious zig zag pattern plowed in the grass from the tree to the barn.

CHAPTER 14

Amy

    I
shuffle down the stairs looking forward to a large cup of coffee.  I was
up almost all night again.  I sleep for a couple of hours, wake up in a
sweat and can’t go back to sleep, so I read.  I want to ask Dillon to stay
with me again, but then we’d both be useless.  I do sleep better next to
him and I don’t have as many nightmares, but it’s still a restless sleep as
he’s constantly trying to soothe me.  I love it, but I don’t want to be
selfish.  He needs his sleep.

    I
see him sitting at the kitchen table leaning over his little computer again and
eating a bowl of cereal.  He hasn’t showered yet and his hair is just as
unruly as mine.  He’s shirtless and wearing a pair of sleep pants with a
drawstring that I imagine pulling on and letting his pants fall to the ground.
 The book I read last night is obviously having an effect on me.  I
walk directly to the coffee pot, pour myself a cup, and plop into the chair
next to him.

    “Morning,”
I say into my coffee.

    “Morning,
how’d you sleep?”

    “Okay.”
 I lie. “Whatcha doing?”

    “Checking
email and stuff.  If you ever need to use the computer, you’re welcome to
use it.  I don’t have a password on it or anything.”

    “I
really don’t know what I would use it for.”

    Dillon
laughs at me.  Like a full belly laugh.  “I’m not even sure I want to
corrupt you, but it’ll be fun.  Come here.”

    I
scoot my chair closer.  He turns his head quickly and plants an unexpected
kiss on my lips.  “Mmmm….good morning.”  He runs his fingers through
my snarled hair, trying to smooth it out.

   “I didn’t
brush my teeth yet.”  I cover my mouth.

    “Doesn’t
matter to me.”  He smiles and gives my hair a little tug.  “So look,
email is mail, only electronic.  That’s pretty much self-explanatory,
right?”  

    I
nod my head.  

    “Facebook
is a social media site.  You invite friends to your page and you can post
pictures and information about what you’ve been up to.  This is Laney’s,”
he says while pointing at different things on the screen.  “She’s on here
more than I am.  I just check in with a few friends every once in a while.
 See, her friends send her recipes. They talk about their books and
stuff.”  He leans back on his chair and turns to me.  “Then, there’s
twitter.  A lot of celebrities tweet.  People follow their tweets,
basically just comments.  If you want to hear what a certain person always
has to say, you follow them.  I don’t tweet.  There’s addictive games
on here like Candy Crush and Words with Friends.  You can play against other
people out in the universe.  Crazy huh?   There are addictive
websites as well, like YouTube.  You can spend hours watching
self-published videos of just about anything.  Then, of course if you just
want random information on anything, you can google it.”

    “Google?”

    Dillon
laughs again.  “God, I love you.”  He shakes his head.

    He
loves me?!   He must realize the words that came out of his mouth.
 His face turns red and he looks nervous.

    “I
just….you’re the girl for me.  Just the way you are.”  He leans over
and kisses my cheek and then jumps up from his chair.  

    I
don’t know what to say so I sit there in awkward silence.

    “Question.
 Fruity Pebbles or Cookie Crisp?” he asks, not quite looking at me.

I don’t follow so I stare
blankly at him.

    “Cereal.
 Have you had either?”

    “No.
 Usually oatmeal.  I’ll try Cookie Crisp.  Who wouldn’t want to
try cookies for breakfast?”

    Dillon
grabs me a bowl and goes into the pantry for the box of cereal.  I’m still
thinking about his words.  He didn’t take them back.  He didn’t say
he was joking.  I’m still stunned.  He sets the bowl in front of me
and then stands behind me, rubbing my shoulders.

    “Mmmmmmm.”
 I can’t get enough of his hands on me.

    “Buster
misses you.  You want to help me with the horses and then go for a ride?”

    “Yes.
 First show me how to google.  I have a question.”

   He pulls
the computer over in front of me and uses his finger to point the arrow at a
colorful circle and sure enough, I see the word Google.  He points the
arrow at the empty box.  “Now type whatever you want.”

    I
type a question, slowly, trying to find all the letters on the keyboard.
 Dillon takes his seat next to me where he can’t see what I’m typing as if
it’s something he shouldn’t see.  “Ah!  Eeyore is in fact a boy and
there is no good answer for why he wears a pink bow on his tail.”

    “I
needed to know that,” he says and takes a sip of his coffee.

    Dillon
and I have a routine now.  We work side by side in the stalls and we’ve
cut the time it takes us to finish in half.  The horses are happy and
we’re happy.  By afternoon, Dillon and I ride through the trails with
Buster and Ben.  I’m a pro at riding now.  Buster trusts me and I
trust him and we work well together. After a couple of hours of riding, the sun
begins to set, so Dillon and I put Buster and Ben back in their stalls, grab
some blankets and set up a small campfire.  We sit next to each other and
share a blanket draped across our shoulders.

    “They’re
called s’mores.  Graham crackers, melted marshmallows, and chocolate.”

    “Mmmm….that
sounds amazing.”

    “They
are.  Here.”  He hands me a long stick with a marshmallow on the end.
 “Toast it in the fire and then I’ll show you how to make the s’more.”

    I twist
my marshmallow in the flames and watch it start to bubble as the flames heat
it.  Once it’s nice and toasted and about to ooze off of the stick, Dillon
smashes it in between two crackers with a piece of chocolate in the middle.
 

    “Try
it.”  He hands me the gooey treat and I take a huge bite.  I can feel
the stickiness of the marshmallow on the side of my lips.  Then he leans
in.  His mouth covers mine, sucking on the corners of my lips until the
stickiness is gone and then he licks his lips.  “I like tasting it on you
better.”

    My
cheeks flame with heat and it’s not from the fire.  Dillon is very sensual
and I feel like I go somewhere else when he touches me or when he talks to me
like that.  Like I’m drawn into one of my novels, only it’s real.
 He’s real.

    “Come
lay down with me, look at all the stars.”

    I
take the last bite of my s’more and lower myself onto the blanket next to him.

    “Wow.
 Look at all of them.  It’s beautiful.”

    “It
is.  If you watch long enough and you’re patient, you might see a shooting
star and then you can make a wish.”

    “Really?
 Have you ever seen one?”

    “I
have.  They’re fast so you have to focus.”

    We
lay there on our backs, side by side staring up into the starry sky.
 Dillon’s hand moves over mine, he threads our fingers together and then
squeezes.  “What would you wish for Amy?”

    “Happiness.”
I say without a doubt.

    “Not
a million dollars, a big house or a trip somewhere tropical?”

    “Nope.
 I just don’t want to be alone anymore.  I don’t want to be afraid.
 I want to be normal and love life.  I want to love and be loved. I
want a happily ever after.”