Here For You (6 page)

“Did that fucker just cancel on your date?” Emma asked. She didn’t have to guess…she knew. Actually, she called it last week when I told her about the date. Grey always had to do something with work, and lately it was a lot more. “You see, if that was James he would’ve said ‘screw work I’m taking my sexy ass girlfriend out.’” There she goes with James again.

But that would never happen because James wasn’t like that and we aren’t together. “It’s…whatever.” I started to mindlessly flip the pages in my book. I couldn’t believe he’d cancelled again. That was twice in two weeks, and I had really been looking forward to this outing.

“It’s whatever, my ass! You fucking bought
brand
new clothes and shoes. You see that’s exactly why I say he’s an asshole with a capital A,” Emma shouted. When she got excited she tended to yell.

“Shhhhhhhh!” I told her, looking around to see people watching us like we were nuts.

“You know what? You’re coming out with me tonight. We’re going to go shopping and dan…” I cut her off before she could finish.

“I don’t think so. It’s okay, really. Besides, I haven’t been spending too much down time with my pops, so that’s what I want to do tonight.” A huge smile formed on my face. I missed my dad, which was weird because we lived in the same house. But I had the same problem as Grey; I worked a lot and with school, sometimes it was impossible to sit and enjoy time with him. I had to earn enough for his medicine and the bills, which meant I barely got to see much of him, let alone spend time with him. So, thank you, Grey, for that, because I would be spending time with the best man in the world. My father. Crazy the way things worked out.

My father was a very important person in my life. When I was just a few months old my mother walked out on him. Usually mothers take their children with them, but not mine. She left me behind too. She just up and left a man who had never had to care for a child on his own before. A man who had no idea what he was doing. Now that I thought about it, I felt bad for him. He must’ve given up so much for me and probably still was.

Times were tough when I was little, not because he was a bad father but because he had to work twice as hard to put a roof over our head and food in our bellies. There were times when I didn’t want to stay at the babysitter’s house because she was a mean old lady who didn’t let me do anything. I was so angry with my dad for leaving me there, but now I know why he had to. We didn’t have family where we were, no aunts, no uncles, no one to take care of me, so my dad did what he had to do. He would tell me how sometimes I used to hide every time he had to go to work. I couldn’t believe I was so afraid of that old hag.

We moved a total of five times and always to a different state because one always got tougher than the previous one as time passed. We also always had to find the cheapest place to go. I never really minded until I got older and started to make friends. Leaving them was always the hardest part.

I would always look up to my Dad because of everything he went through to keep a roof over our heads. All of that hard work eventually paid off when he was finally was able to save enough for a place of our own. No more renting or staying with other people. It was ours and just perfect for us.

As I pulled up with my old ass red Corolla to our little blue house with crabgrass and dead flowers in the front yard, I appreciated everything this man had done for me. It was because of him that I wanted to do something with my life, although I was clueless about the specifics. Because of him I wanted to graduate so he could see me walk down some type of aisle with a ‘sort of’ degree in my hands even though it would be a certificate.

I was only going to a two year community college studying for a certificate in medical assisting, nothing serious. My grades weren’t all that great in high school. I was always too worried about the people and things around me rather than schoolwork. I learned after I graduated that people could kiss my ass. I didn’t have to impress anybody. Some might’ve thought I was a bookworm or teacher’s pet, but I was the total opposite. My grades sucked, but I knew I wasn’t leaving my dad so I didn’t care about college too much back then.

He got into an accident at work about a year ago that left him disabled and unable to do his job. He almost lost his leg. So every month he receives a disability check, which helps a lot. He did everything for me, and now it was time for me to return the favor.

I picked up the red box movie I’d got at the store where I got my beer. The only beer in the fridge was Blue Moon and that shit tasted like soap. So I had to pick up some Coronas for myself.
 I passed my father’s pickup truck, which he only used to go to and from the hospital for his regular checkups. He had diabetes so for him to get checked regularly was a must since the man hated to listen to his doctor. I offered to drive him but he was an independent, stubborn guy that refused my offer of help. Crazy old man.

As I entered the house I took in my dad’s smell. I couldn’t really pinpoint what it was but it smelt like…home. He
was
my home. He was everything and I would do anything for him. If I had to give my life for him I would in a heartbeat.

“Becca, is that you?” I heard him ask. He must have been in the living room, sitting on his big, comfy recliner. I bought him that one day when he was eyeing it at Ikea. He said I didn’t have to, but when I came home with it he was thrilled. Now he couldn’t part with the thing.

I kicked the door shut with my foot and headed into the kitchen. “Yeah, dad, it’s me.” I had to shout a little; the kitchen wasn’t far from the living room but with the TV on you could barely hear a thing. I swore it was like he was going deaf. Who puts their TV on the highest volume setting anyways?

I placed my Coronas in the fridge, grabbing one Blue Moon that was already in there for my dad. I really didn’t know how he could drink that stuff, it was disgusting.

Yuck.

Picking up the red box movie from the table, I made my way to him. He was reclined all the way back, with his feet in the air. I couldn’t help but giggle. He moved his head so he was looking toward me. I handed him the beer but he shook his head so I placed it on the coffee table.

I sat down on the sofa, relaxing as best as I could. “What are you watching?” I asked, glancing at the TV. It looked like some horrible kung fu movie. The kind where the lips keep moving when nobody is talking. How the heck could anyone sit through this? It was stupid.

But he didn’t answer my question. Instead, he asked, “What’s that in your hand?”

I lifted my beer. “Corona.” I knew he wasn’t talking about that but I couldn’t pass up a sarcastic remark.

My dad was a big guy. I don’t mean fat or anything, but he had a slight beer belly. Not like those guys who look like they are carrying a child but the kind of belly where you can tell its owner has had a few beers in his time. My dad was fifty-six but his hair was almost completely white; he blamed it on his side of the family. We had the same button nose and full lips. I’m guessing I got my 5’3 height from someone else because he was well over six foot. He was my teddy bear.

“Really, wiseass? I’m talking about that red box thing in your hand?” he said.

“Oh, this thing? It’s a cowboy movie,” I explained and he looked at me confused. He knew I didn’t watch those movies. I found them very boring and I always slept through them.

He lowered his feet from the recliner and sat upright. “I thought you had a date, honey.” Concern filled his eyes.

I shrugged. “He’s busy.” I didn’t want to get into details, at least not right now. He was such a concerned father; I couldn’t have asked for anything more. I felt like my problems had been his for too long a time now and I don’t want to burden him anymore.

“I’m sorry, baby. You want to talk about it?”

Shaking my head, I walked to the DVD player and popped the movie in before walking back. “Tonight is father-daughter night.”

Stealing a glance at him I saw that he had stood up and was making his way to me. Leaning my head way back, I looked up at him. “That sounds perfect,” he said, sitting down next to me on the sofa.

“Dad, you can stay on your recliner.”

He put his arm around me, pulling me in close. “I want to be with my baby girl.”

“I need to thank Grey for this.” I told him leaning into his side listening to his strong heartbeat.

My own personal teddy bear.

He’d done it all for me. I could remember when I was about four, or maybe a little older, I think, I was running up and down the sidewalk when all of a sudden I fell hard, scraping the shit out of my knee. The skin was pulled back and blood was everywhere. When he heard my scream he ran to me. I don’t think I’d ever seen him move that fast. He scooped me up like a baby to bring me inside our apartment.

Putting the peroxide on the scrape made my eyes tear up, so whenever it burned or stung he would blow very hard, making his cheeks big and red. I couldn’t help but giggle. He was always trying to make me laugh.

But even though he would try to make me laugh there were times I would catch him thinking. Stress was written on his face as well as looking lost. I wondered if he thought about
her,
the woman who’d helped create me. I mean, he had to because he loved her at one point. Or perhaps he still did. I’d never seen my dad with a woman in any of our homes, unless it was a babysitter for me. He didn’t date; I was his world. I hated to say it, but I think I kept him away from finding love again. But sometimes love from a daughter or son just isn’t enough. You want that important person in your life, that person you can’t live without. The one you love with all of your heart and soul. The one that would grow old with you. My dad only had me, and I didn’t think I’d grow old with him.

“Honey,” I heard someone whisper by my ear.

My head was bent on something big and warm. Remembering the events of the night, I knew it was my dad. Slowly opening my eyes, I saw that the credits were scrolling up. Damn, I must have dosed off. Always happened with these types of movies.

“I’m sorry, I must have been more tired than what I thought,” I said, stretching my arms above my head. “So much for a father-daughter night,” I yawned.

He let out a small chuckle. “It was the best, honey.” He kissed me on top of the head before slowly standing up, his face twisted in pain. Damn, his leg must be giving him problems.

“Are you okay?” I was a little more awake now.

He brushed me off. “Comes with old age, honey. I’m going to bed. I need my rest. Thank you for tonight, and tell Grey I said thanks too.”

Standing up, I shut the DVD player off along with the TV. Wrapping my arms around him while he did the same to me I said, “I love you, Daddy.” I don't normally say daddy; it made me feel like a little girl, which I wasn’t, but when I was with my dad that’s all I wanted to be.

He set his chin above my head. “I love you too, darling. I love you too.”

We both walked upstairs. He went to his room and I went to the bathroom to brush my teeth and comb my hair real quick. When I went in my room I took my bra off.

Oh my goodness, what a beautiful relief.

I changed into a pair of pink boy shorts and a white tank top before plopping on the bed. Reaching for my phone I turned it on because I shut if off earlier, I saw that it was 11:34pm, and I had a few texts.

Grey: I miss you. I’m sorry about tonight. Thank you for understanding though. (9:01pm)

He was lucky I’d had a good time tonight with my dad because this was the second date he’d canceled in two weeks. I enjoyed the time I spend with Grey and I wish that tonight were one of those nights. But it turned out perfect anyway.

Me: Hey, it’s OK. I ended up staying in to watch a movie with my dad. We had a wonderful time. I’ll call u in the morning. (11:36pm)

The next one was from Emma.

Emma: Hey, luv. Hope u and ur dad r having a wonderful time (10:10pm).

She was just too sweet. I think she was more pissed about Grey canceling on me than I was. I swore, the woman couldn’t stand his ass. I wondered what he did for her to dislike him so much. She started school after he’d graduated so it’s not like she really knew him. It was probably because she was wrapped up in the fact that James and I are meant to be. Shaking my head, I reply to her text.

Me: U r probably sleeping, but we had a blast. Movie and beers. Luv u (11:37pm)

The last text was from James. I couldn’t help but smile.

James: Hey babes, just checking to c how u r doing? (11:29pm)

If he had just written that ten minutes ago then he might still be awake, although, he was a fast sleeper. I’d take my chance.

Me: Hey punk. I’m doing good. Had a father-daughter nite (11:40pm)

If he didn’t text me back then I was going to sleep. I placed my phone on my nightstand. Next to my lamp I had a picture of James, Emma and I when we went to the fair. I was holding a huge pink, stuffed animal that James had won for me on one of those ‘toss the ring on the bottle’ games. He was always good at those odd games. His arms were around me, kissing my cheeks while Emma was on the other side of me laughing as well. She had just moved here. Damn, that was only a few years back. I couldn’t believe how young we looked there. It was a good thing I filled out well because I was so weird looking in that picture. My boobs were so small and my legs look too skinny for my body. My hair was unkempt, always in a low ponytail and my eyebrows needed some serious waxing.