Her Guardians: Her Guardians Trilogy Book 1 (43 page)

Once he opened it and closed
it behind him, it was like a bomb went off inside my head and my chest. I felt the walls cave in on me. I had lost Stephen, but who could blame him for leaving me? He was just trying to make my choice that much easier.

He was letting me know t
hat he wanted me to be happy—with Michael. I know he was selflessly giving that to me, and I know it was always Michael. But why did it hurt so much? Why could I not accept that he was gone and just let him live his life? Why was it so goddamned hard?

S
itting there for a few moments, I wondered what the hell I was supposed to do next. My gaze fell upon the music box. I wound it up again and watched as she danced. She truly was mesmerising.

My heart couldn’t take much more.
I closed the box once I remembered where I was. I can’t let myself get carried away at work. I needed to take a few deep breaths and compose myself.

I
buried my head in my hands and did just that. I was so lost in myself that I didn’t even hear the door opening.

“
Er, Cassie?”

L
ooking up, I found Tracey standing there. She looked a little timid and I would imagine she should be after what she said about me.

“I wanted to come in here and apologise for what I said.
It was wrong of me and I’m sorry.”

“So why did you say it?
Are you just feeling guilty because you got caught?”

I was a little snappy
, but I wasn’t in a good mood right now. I was upset and it was probably the worst time Tracey could have picked to come to me and apologise.

She winced slightly and shuffled
her feet. I immediately calmed myself a little, then the guilt came. It obviously took a lot for her to come to me.

“You know how it gets around her
e, Cassie. It was a joke. I know it was at your expense, but I didn’t mean anything by it. Honestly.”

I sighed, shaking my head slightly.
“I’m not sure what to think.”

“You look really upset and I don’t want to be the one to do that to you.”

I couldn’t believe this day so far. Maybe I should have stayed in bed. “It was upsetting, Tracey. I was attacked. I didn’t ask for it. I went in there and he followed me. Jesus, you must know what he did to his wife.”

Tracey winced slightly.
“Yes, I know. That’s why it was a joke. A very poor one, but one that wasn’t meant to cause you pain.”

“I’m not that type of person, Tracey.
I never have been.”

“I know that.
I know you’ve never had a relationship here, but I must tell you something. There are rumours.”

Oh
, here we go.
“What rumours?”

“Some officers have seen both Michael and Stephen going into your flat.”

I could feel the anger burning my stomach. “So?”

“So it seem
s like you’re going out with both of them at the same time.”

I couldn’t believe this.
“Not that it’s any business of yours, but it’s nothing of the sort.”

Who was I kidding?
It was
everything
of the sort.

“Can’t I invite men
around to my flat without there being any kind of funny business going on once my door is shut?”

I could see the eagerness in her eyes.
“So you’re just friends with them?”

“I don’t have to justify my actions to you.”
I didn’t want to have to explain my private life to her. It was none of her business. Plus, she made me wary after what she said. There’s no way of telling whether she was going to use whatever I tell her and blab to everyone around the station.

“No, of course not.
Sorry. I just wanted to come here, apologise, and warn you about the rumours. It is none of my business or anyone else’s. It just comes with the territory of working in this kind of environment.”

I sigh
ed a little and let out a sarcastic chuckle. I started thinking that it was best to carry on, head up high, and just ignore everyone. If all they could do in their lives was spread rumours about me, they’re lives are distinctly lacking.

“Whatever.
” I shrugged my shoulders in resolution. “People can think what they want, Tracey. I don’t give a shit anymore. I have other, more important things to think about than this. I appreciate you coming here and apologising, but I’ll be damned if I bow down to stupid insinuating gossip.”

“Sure, sure.”
She smiled timidly. “I’ll be off then.”

I nod
ded in her direction and watched as she left the office.

It was such a funny situation that I had to laugh out loud.
I was being watched without even realising it and the rumour mill began. Little did everyone know that I was still a virgin. Not that it meant anything. The trouble was that the rumours were true. I’m not sleeping with them, but I’m as good as.

In my daze
, I immediately sought the phone for solace. I knew just who to call in this situation.

D
ialling the extension, I let it ring a couple of times. “I take it that this is the infamous Cassie?” The sound of Kali’s cheerful voice instantly relaxed me.

“You would be correc
t in your assumption.” I giggled and twirled the phone cord between my fingers.

“How
are you feeling?”

I sighed
, relaxing back in my chair. “Strange, I must admit. I just had Tracey here apologising for what she said the other day.”

“What
did she say?”

I had completely forgotten to t
ell Kali about this, so I gave her all the details. She sucked in her breath. “What a bitch! Are you okay?”

I smiled
, feeling a little better already. It was nice knowing I had a friend who had my back. “Yes, I’m fine. As I said, she came to apologise, then politely told me there were rumours going around.”

“About you, Michael
, and Stephen?”

My posture
straightened. “How did you know?”

“When the rumours are flying
, dear Cassie, it’s hard not to hear them.”

I suddenly felt a little betrayed by this
revelation. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because I knew it would hurt you.
Besides, it’s none of their fucking business. People like that piss me off. I know they’re saying stuff about Hamish and me, but I don’t give a fuck—and neither should you. So what if you’re shagging both of them at the same time? I know I would.”

“Kali!” I screamed.
“You’re so crude and you so know that’s not true.” As quick as that, I had forgiven her.

“Yes, Miss Flower
pot. I know.”

“It will happen one day, Kali.
And I’ll make sure you’re the first person I come to with the news.”

She laughed
a little. “I’ll hold you to that.”

“Sure thing.”

“Just remember something for me, Cassie. It doesn’t matter what people think. You know in your heart of hearts the kind of person you are. You’re friends and people who care about you know in their heart of hearts the kind of person you are, too. That is all that counts.”

I had to smile
. She always knew how to make me feel better. “You’re such a true friend, you know that, Kali? I really appreciate everything you have done for me. You’ve been my best friend since school.”

“Don’t mention it.
You’re a good person, Cassie. Don’t let anyone else tell you different.”

“Okay, thank you.”

“Fancy another drink tomorrow night? I can’t tonight. I have plans.”

My cheeky grin surfaced.
“With Hamish?”

“Yes, something like that,” she giggled.

I think I needed more of Kali in my life. We certainly had been neglecting each other lately what with me, Michael, and Stephen, and her with Hamish. “That sounds great. I’ll look forward to it.”

“Brill!
I’ll catch up with you later.”

“Sure.
And thanks again—for everything.”

“No worries.
Love ya, girl!”

Sighing contently
, I smiled. “Love you, too, Kali.”

Chapter 21

The day seemed to go pretty quickly after that.
I busied myself going through all the emails that were left, and cancelled appointments that Simon had for the day.

Rescheduling them was tough
, though, as I didn’t know whether he was going to be back tomorrow or not. I could only do my best and hope that I didn’t muck things up too much for when he
did
come back. 

During my time at work
, I was determined not to think about Stephen too much but, at times, it was fruitless. I still ached every time I thought about him leaving. He told me he wasn’t going to be that far, but it still hurt like hell knowing he wasn’t going to be a permanent fixture in my life.

S
ighing at my desk, I wondered what in the hell I was going to do now. It was a little after five and I knew I should be heading home. Michael was going to be finished a little later, and Stephen said he would come for me.

What was I supposed to tell him?
What was I supposed to do? The minute I thought things had sorted themselves out, something came along and completely confused the hell out of me.

Not
sure about what I was going to do, I gathered my things. It was strange. I felt this added pressure on me to make a decision. It was like Stephen coming to me this morning had made it all so urgent that I take action. I had to finally get a grip and really think about what I wanted—or, shall I say, who I wanted?

S
witching everything off, I headed for the stairs. I said my cursory goodbyes along the way and walked out into the cold.

I
started walking towards my little flat and started thinking hard. I needed to get my act together. I quickly found myself in a world of my own, contemplating my next move. Did I really want Michael, as Stephen suggested? It all just made my head hurt.

I was in such turmoil about the whole thing that I didn’t even register at first
that my phone was ringing. Digging into my pocket, I pulled it out to find my uncle Billy was calling.

I swiftly answer
ed to a shrieking voice. “Cassie!” Billy’s booming voice was like an excitable child. I would be worried that something was wrong, but I could tell it was something quite the opposite.

“Uncle
Billy, hi.”

“Is there an
y chance you can come around? I want to ask you something.”

“Yeah
, sure.” I was suddenly intrigued by his enthusiasm. “I’m actually only five minutes away from your house. I’m coming now.”

Hanging up
, I made my way to his house. He sounded somewhat excited and I wanted to see why. Maybe whatever he had to say would be just the distraction I needed right now.

Once there, I knocked on the door and Uncle Billy answered, a big smile on his face. “Cassie. Come in. I need to ask you some things.”

“Okay
…” I raised my eyebrow, not having a clue what he had up his sleeve.

We walk
ed into his living room and sat down. He took a deep breath and grabbed my arm. “I need you to humour an aging man. Can you do that?”

“Okay, go ahead,” I chuckled.

“I just want to do a little experiment with you. I’m going to ask you some questions and I want you to answer them as quickly as you possibly can. Just think of the first answer that pops into your head.”

“Okay, I can do that—I think
…”

“Okay, here goes.
Oranges or bananas?”

“Bananas.”

“Swimming pool or sea?”