Heaven and Hell (56 page)

Celeste’s response was a little less
exuberant but still openly happy.

What could I do?

I went with it.

It got worse.

And how it got worse was, over coffee and
Maris’s pancake breakfast, while everyone was chatting about how
fabulous it was that Sam and I had moved in together (yes, past
tense), Sam’s phone rang and, for once, he didn’t move out of the
room to take the call.

No.

Instead, standing by me where I sat on a
stool at the kitchen bar, Sam swept my hair off my neck, left his
arm around my shoulders and said, “Yeah, Ford, things are still
cool. All good. Listen, Kia talked with me last night and she wants
you and Essie, Kyle and Gitte to come out for a visit. Can you talk
to Kyle and Essie about that? Set somethin’ up?” Pause then,
“Right. Whenever you want, we got plenty of room.”

Yes, he said
we got plenty of room.
We!

Then my lungs froze when he went on to say,
“Kia’ll need to arrange to have her shit moved here. We might come
out and sort it or we might need you.” Pause then, “Yeah, she’s
movin’ out here.” Pause then on a grin down at me which meant my
father had somehow communicated his utter joy at Sam’s statement in
the three seconds Sam was silent, “Yeah, Ford, it’s all good.”

I was blinking up at him uncertain not only
what to do but also what to feel.

It couldn’t be said I was against living in
Sam’s fabulous beach house with Sam in North Carolina.

It also couldn’t be said I wanted to move
away from my family and friends in Indiana.

What could be said was that I would have
liked to discuss both of these prior to Sam announcing it to his
family, my family and arranging with my father to have my stuff
moved.

Shit.

For peace of mind, I decided not to focus on
Sam jumping to an erroneous conclusion and then not wasting any
time acting on it. Instead, I decided to focus on the fact that Sam
wanted me to live with him and wasted no time acting on it.

This was harder to do when we all climbed
into vehicles in order to spend the day futzing around
Wilmington.

It was harder because I also spent the day
taking calls from Mom, Paula, Teri, Missy, Gitte
and
Kyle
all in throes of ecstasy that Sam and I were moving in together.
They all knew about it because Dad had shared. They were bummed us
moving in together meant me moving to another state but they
definitely felt the upside considering that included a beach house
they could visit.

In fact, during Mom’s
second
phone
call, she informed me, “Gitte and I have it sussed, honey. How does
three weeks sound for you? We’ll rent a U-Haul and bring your stuff
with us.” Then before I could answer she ordered, “Don’t answer.
Talk to Sam. Call back. But Kyle, Gitte and I are putting in for
vacation time today.”

Shit again!

Since Maris was leaving the next day, we had
a fancy night out at a posh eatery in Kingston. By the time we got
home, had after dinner drinks and conversation, Luci and Celeste
went back to her place, Maris upstairs and Hap prepared to crash on
the couch, I was exhausted from spending so much effort hiding the
fact that I was freaking out.

And I was still freaking out so much I
didn’t know how to broach the subject with Sam.

But even if I did, when I hit a bed with Sam
already in it, I found Sam was in a different mood. Sam felt like
celebrating our future togetherness, not having a chat about it.
And he didn’t talk me into participating, as such, since the way he
did
talk me into it didn’t have words but actions. So I
participated, avidly. And our celebration lasted a long,
long
time.

So now I was standing in the bathroom,
brushing my teeth, dragging.

What
had
been discussed yesterday
were today’s plans. Sam was taking Maris to the airport by himself
so they could have some alone time. I was spending the day with
Celeste so she and I could have some alone time. And Hap was
spending the day with Luci then heading back to Fort Bragg.

Which meant, maybe tomorrow, I could find
some time to broach the subject with Sam and today I had the time
to discuss the situation with my sage friend Celeste.

I hung onto this because I was thrilled to
bits that I loved a Sam who loved me but I was terrified at how
fast everything was happening.

I kept brushing as the shower went off and
kept brushing but commenced burying the urge to wipe down the
fogged mirror in order to watch Sam alight from the shower when I
heard the shower door open.

Then I felt Sam’s arm lock around my waist,
his lips touch my neck then move to my ear where he muttered, “Move
over, baby, need the sink to shave.”

“Okay,” I muttered through foam, stepped
aside and kept brushing.

Sam reached into the medicine cabinet and
came out with shave cream. While he was rubbing it on, I became
mesmerized with watching him because, even with all the time we
spent together, I’d never seen him shave. And I’d certainly never
seen him shave standing at the basin wearing only a towel around
his hips.

Jeez. His jaw was very square.

Since I was mesmerized, I saw his head turn
and his lips twitch before he asked, “Jesus, Kia, how long do you
brush?”

Oh man.

I was such a dork!

I pulled the brush out of my mouth and
covered with, “A long time.” Then I recommenced brushing.

He grinned at me and commenced shaving,
muttering, “Must be why your teeth are so white.”

He was wrong. One of the first things I did
when Cooter and Vanessa accidentally made me rich instead of making
me dead was go to a dentist and have my teeth professionally
whitened. I didn’t have ugly, yellow teeth but I found the idea of
having your teeth whitened decadent. I always wanted to do it. So
when I got my windfall, I did.

Deciding my work on my teeth was done and
Sam might think I was a little crazy if I brushed longer
and
stared at him shaving like I wasn’t his girlfriend who was now
apparently living with him but instead a rabid fan who was living
the dream of standing in a bathroom with him, his razor and his
hips encased in nothing but a towel, I pulled the brush from my
mouth and garbled, “Sink.”

Sam gave me room; I spit, rinsed, put my
toothbrush away and wiped my hands.

Then I muttered, “I’ll bring you a cup of
coffee,” and started out of the bathroom but found myself unmoving
and in Sam’s arms looking up at Sam with a shaved neck but jaws and
cheeks that were still foamed. In my perpetual freak out at all
that was happening, I therefore blurted, “Only you could look
supremely hot with shaving cream on your face.”

Sam’s loose arms went tight as he burst out
laughing.

And that was when it hit me, staring up at
the man I loved who loved me, standing in his arms in his bathroom,
him shaving, me about to go down and get him a cup of coffee, that
not only could I do this, I wanted to.

North Carolina. Indiana. The moon. I didn’t
care.

Knowing each other a month, a year, a
lifetime. I didn’t care.

It wasn’t too soon.

I loved him. He loved me. And wherever we
were, it didn’t matter, just as long as it was a place that had
him.

Sam quit laughing, looked down at me and
instantly proved that my earth-rocking decision was right by
saying, “Well, baby, you look good in your little dresses and your
heels, in your shorts, in your nightie but the best you ever look
is in the morning when you roll outta my bed.”

See what I mean?

“Stop being sweet in the morning before I’ve
had coffee,” I returned. “I don’t have the energy to demonstrate my
gratitude.”

He grinned but ignored me, his face dipped
closer and he went on in a low, rougher than usual but still velvet
voice to finish, “
Especially
a morning after I fucked you
hard, I fucked you long and I made you come often. Fuck, baby,” his
voice went even
more
velvet as his gaze heated, “your eyes
are dreamy, your hair’s a sexy-as-hell mess and your lips are still
swollen.” He touched his mouth to mine and whispered,
“Beautiful.”

Then he got shaving cream all over my face
and he did this by kissing me for a really long time.

When he was done, I was breathing hard and
Sam was swiping at the shaving cream on my face with his thumb when
I decided my only reply could be, “I love you, Sam,” so that was
what I said.

His thumb swept shaving cream across my jaw
as his face got soft, his eyes went warm and he muttered,
“Good.”

I grinned at him.

He grinned back.

Then he ordered, “Get me some coffee.”

“Bossy,” I murmured, he grinned again, gave
me a gentle push to the door, I took his direction, nabbed a hand
towel on the way and swiped at the shaving cream.

Then I got myself a cup of coffee and took
one up to my man.

I went back downstairs because I’d seen
Maris on the deck with Memphis so I took my coffee out to join
her.

Memphis bounced to me, yapping.

Maris turned to me, smiled and called, “Good
morning.”

“Morning,” I called back and asked, “You
want time alone or are you good with company?”

“Live alone, honey, so company.”

I joined her, sitting in a chair already
pulled up next to hers. Memphis joined us by jumping in my lap. I
moved my feet to the railing of the deck, my fabulous robe dropped
open to expose my legs and Memphis settled in a curl in her Momma’s
lap so I could sip my coffee.

“Got shaving cream on your face,” Maris
muttered, her sweet velvet voice vibrating with amusement.

Shit!

I swiped at my face, asking, “Where?”

“Right cheek,” she answered, still sounding
amused.

I moved my fingers there, encountered Sam’s
shave cream and wiped it away. Then I rubbed my fingers together to
get rid of it. Then I started petting my dog.

“That robe sure is pretty,” Maris noted.

“Thanks. Luci has one like it and I admired
hers so she took me to the place in Como that sells them.”

“They’d be hit at my shop but exporting is a
pain in the behind. Tried it a couple of times, had to up the
prices because of duty, stuff sat on the rails forever, even in
Malibu.”

Knowing the cost of this robe, add duty,
even in Malibu, I could imagine.

“Hap’s out running, by the way,” she
continued.

“Okay,” I replied and took another sip then
told her, “Sam’s had a shower and he’s shaving. He’ll probably be
down in a second.”

“Right then I don’t have much time.”

Oh no.

Surprise attack.

I blinked at the ocean then turned my head
to her, mentally bracing, wondering what was to come.

She didn’t tear her eyes from the beach and
she didn’t waste any time.

“You’re not a mother yet, honey, and even if
you were, I don’t know if you can imagine but I worried…” She
trailed off, kept her eyes glued to the beach then went on in a
quiet voice, “I so worried about my Sammy.”

I wasn’t sure where this was going. What I
was sure of was that I was dying to know just as much as I feared
finding out.

“Maris –” I started and that was when her
eyes came to me, they were shimmering with tears so I shut up.

“He had his fun, I know this. He’s a man, he
would. I also know this because it was up in my face
all the
time.
Magazines, even TV. Those women…” She shook her head.
“None of them…” She pressed her lips together then looked back at
the beach. “After… well, later… well, until a few days ago, I
despaired. They… women… it seemed…” She was struggling, she pulled
in breath and looked back at me. “It seemed impossible he’d find
one even worthwhile much less…” she pressed her lips together then
finished on a whispered, “
you.
”

Oh God!

Now I felt my eyes shimmering with tears, my
body warm all over and not from the early, summer North Carolina
sun and I whispered back, “Maris.”

“You love Sammy.”

I nodded.

“No, honey,” she leaned into me, “you love
Sammy.
”

“Yes, Maris, I know exactly what you mean,”
I told her quietly and I did. I knew what she was saying. I didn’t
love Sampson Cooper. I loved her Sammy.

This time, she nodded.

Then she said quietly back, “You know I know
what was done to you.”

“I know,” I replied.

“He’ll never hurt you, Kia.”

I smiled through my wavering tears. “I
know.”

“I cannot tell you how pleased I am he found
you but, meeting you, now I can say I’m pleased you found my Sammy
too.”

I moved my coffee cup to my other hand,
reached out and grabbed hers. Then I held on tight.

Then I shared, “I can say that too.” I
grinned. “
Boy,
can I say that.”

She gently twisted her hand from mine,
leaned into me and placed it on my cheek, saying softly, “We share
more than Sammy, honey. I know all about walking right through
hell, years of it and suddenly finding yourself on the other side.
Glad it gets to be me who greets you there. But more, I’m glad I
can say I raised a man who would take your hand and lead the
way.”

All right, she was killing me.

I clenched my teeth, sucked in breath and
just managed to stop myself from bursting into tears.

Then I muttered, “Jeez, Maris, between your
son being sweet and you being sweeter and me not even having a full
cup of coffee, if you two don’t stop, I’ll be a wreck and never be
able to face the day.”

She chuckled quietly then remarked, “There
are worse things.”

She was right about that.

“Definitely,” I whispered.

She smiled at me. Then she studied me. Then
she patted my cheek once, dropped her hand and turned back to the
view of the beach.