Heart Song (21 page)

There was more to
what was going on than Marren was telling me. After I calmed down from my dream, he left to find me something to eat. He didn't want me leaving the room without him and even went as far as stationing a few guards outside my door to prevent anyone but him from coming in. I wanted to see Danst, but he had forbidden it. I had to hold back my anger and just accept that he had his reasons. But to keep me locked up like a prisoner, it had better be a damn good excuse.

I walked to the window. It resembled every other window that dotted the face of the mountain. The frame was carved smooth, the rest of the rock on the outside and inside left jagged and natural. Below me was a clearing, nestled against the face of the mountain. A black, charred spot in the center of that with some cut off tree trunks as stools surrounded it. There was a small stream that trickled along to a bigger pool just to the side and further down the hill. I wondered if it led to the pool I saw when I first arrived.
The one with the shadows.

The trees had thick, brown trunks and stretched out like giant green spikes reaching towards the sky. They covered the land in patches, with small spaces for paths or streams. There were even wider spaces that must have been towns or villages. Beyond them, several larger hills and even a few more mountains jutted up from the ground. The sky was heavily clouded. They were light grey in color—for rain.

Further off to my right were the mountains that bordered the path Danst and I took to get
to
the mountain home.  Thinking about Danst brought a twinge to my gut. I wanted to know why I was suddenly being kept from him. Marren knew he was my best friend. I just couldn’t imagine a reason severe enough to keep me from him.

A knock at the door startled me from my thoughts. I turned to see it was Marren bringing in a small round basket that had some fruit in it, his eyes glimmering with love. His beautiful face was still in wolf form. I thought about asking why, but decided to wait. I was too busy gaping at him, not accustomed to him walking around in only pants and barefoot. His muscles rippled along his chest, abs, and arms, moving as he moved. I was completely filled with the desire to be pressed up to his body. He smiled at me, obviously enjoying my stare.

“Breakfast, my lady?”
He presented the basket in one hand, holding it out to me.

Clearing my throat, I took the bowl and walked to the bed that took up the center of the room. “Thank you. But, why call me lady?”

“It's obvious, isn't it?” he asked.

“No. Should it be?”

He smiled, giving a light chuckle under his breath. “Considering my position, I would think it was.”

I considered that. I guess it only made sense. I shrugged, placing a strawberry into my mouth. The sweet tanginess of the fruit danced along my tongue, awakening my senses.

“I want to show you around now that I have you here and some daylight left,” he said after I ate
a
few pieces of fruit.

“Okay.” I started to set the basket on the bed, but he stopped me, pushing it back into my lap.

“After you've eaten enough.”

I looked at him with a raised eyebrow and finished eating.

“How are you feeling?” he asked after a few moments of silence.

“I'm good.” Marren looked as though he didn't quite believe me. So, I added, “A little stiff and my hands feel odd with the bandages.”

“I have the perfect solution to that. We have a pool here that is always warm. Smells a little bad, but is good for the skin and will help your body heal,” he said anxiously.

I thought about just saying okay, but instead, “I keep expecting us to change back and it hasn't happened yet,” came out.

“That is because here it's not needed.
Whereas, on the mortal realm it is.”

“Oh.” Really, that was all I thought I could say. My mind was still reeling over the past few days and the events that had left me still feeling exhausted. I was too afraid to sleep. Too afraid the nightmares would come back.

***

Marren started the tour by taking me through a series of turns that climbed higher up towards the top of the mountain within the hall that bordered it. I let my hands, now healed and free from bandages, wander along the stone—my fingers moving with the rise and fall of the jagged edges. It was cool to the touch, bringing just the right amount of contrast to the heat given off of Marren's body walking next to me. At the top, a large cliff looked over the entire world, it seemed. It was like standing at the point closest to the stars.

I was shocked at how quickly we made it up. It was mid-afternoon. The clouds had pushed on beyond that of which my eyes could see, but the sun shone brightly across the land that had yet to be shaded by the clouds. We were high enough that I could see villages nestled in between mountain peaks—where the dwarves lived, and forests far off
with trees that grew in tight clusters—where the elves lived.

“This place was made by the dwarves, including Raden. I saved his life once. To return the favor, he thought it would be fair to turn this mountain into a series of rooms and halls. They connect underground with his people. We only use them when necessary.” Marren stood with his arms crossed over his bare chest. It was hard to control myself from leaping and tackling him to the ground. He looked at me from the corner of his eyes as if he heard my thoughts. The corner of his mouth pulled up into a crooked grin but his eyes held sadness there.

“What's wrong?” I asked.

“Nothing, why?”

“Your eyes say otherwise,” I said.

He turned to me slowly. It was evident that he was struggling. He kept his arms wrapped around his torso and his lips were firmly pressed together. “Do you remember the story I told you last night?”

“The one about how traditions are important to your people because of what they had to already lose?”

“Our people, and yes, that one.”

“Well, sort of. I think I fell asleep and dreamed what you were telling me.”

He took in a deep breath. He opened his mouth to say something. His eyes held a fear and sadness in them and I thought for sure he was going to tell me we made a mistake and I wasn't his heart song. But someone ran up from within the mountain.

“Master Marren, there is a matter that needs your attention.”

It was a male guard, dressed with a thick, heavy vest and leather pants. His skin was darker in tone than Marren's with a little more coppery red. And his hair was shorter, sticking up in points along his head.  He glanced at me while he spoke the word “matter” and then back to Marren.

I raised an eyebrow at Marren.
What exactly do you have planned?

His smile at me suggested more than I was going to find out right then. He gave me a quick kiss on my cheek. “Lead your lady to the steaming pools. Have Okelo sit with her.”

Who is Okelo?

My new second in command.
I think you two will get along just fine.
Gvgeyu.

I sighed, watching Marren's back fade into the darkened hall. I shifted my attention to the guard standing off to the side, waiting patiently for me to follow him. I grinned and started stepping after him.

I followed the guard, who made little to no attempts to carry o
n a casual conversation with me,
despite my efforts, to the steaming pools. Marren had grossly underestimated the stench. It smelled strongly of sulfur and made my stomach clench as we got closer. There was even a point where I had to retch into some bushes just off of the dirt path. The guard seemed unsure of what to do and looked scared, judging by how wide his eyes were. I assured him I was fine and continued on the path till it reached a boundary of trees and bushes that gave way to a small ring of grass and flowers just before the pool itself. The waters were black, making it unclear as to the depth. I didn’t know if I had to wade in the pool or swim.

“My lady, Okelo approaches,” the guard spoke, bringing my attention to him from the pools.

Just a few feet up the path, a woman walked, carrying something on her back. I immediately started forming reasons for her to not have to bathe me. I knew Marren meant well and wanted to provide that level of pampering, but I just couldn’t take the guilt. I couldn't do very much for him and clearly he'd been completely turned off by my body for some reason. The last thing I needed was for something else to make me feel awful.

The guard excused himself, giving a slight bow to me and standing firmly erect towards Okelo, not moving until she nodded towards him, giving him permission to leave. It was then I realized that Marren called her his new second in command. I couldn’t help but wonder what happened to his old one. I didn't want to feel jealous of the fact that Okelo was a woman, but I couldn't help it.

She was beautiful, with full curves and skin that was perfect and smooth. Not a flaw, not a scar. It made me extremely wary of taking off my clothes. Even her long hair held sheen.  I wanted to pout and throw a fit. More importantly, I wanted to know if Marren was secretly trying to make me jealous.

“My Lady Relena.
I'm Okelo.” She moved to untie the bag on her back.

“Before you do that, I just want to tell you I am perfectly capable of bathing myself.”

She paused and gave a smile that threw me off. “Of course, my lady,” she said,
then
continued to move the bag to the front of her body.

I was confused when the bag moved and I thought I saw a little hand stick out. But then I heard the grunt and I realized that it wasn't a bag full of soap; it was a bag full of a baby.
A beautiful and completely human looking baby.

My eyes shifted between the baby and Okelo several times before I finally said, “I thought that was a bag of soap.”

She giggled while looking at her child, then her eyes shifted back on me. “This is Serid. He's quite the handful. Would you like to hold him?”

“I—uh, I don't really have experience with babies.”

She shrugged. “It's okay. If you don't mind, I will be feeding him while you soak.”

“Of course,” I said, then quickly undressed and stepped into the pool, surprised at how warm it was and how deep it quickly became. The smelly water went up to my shoulders and I wasn't even at the deepest point yet. The smell did get stronger and my stomach clenched slightly but it wasn't nearly as bad as I expected. I felt myself relax as my muscles soaked up the warmth and soothed away the aches and stiffness. 

I kept feeling myself get pulled towards Serid. It was hard to explain, but my curiosities were getting the better of me. I couldn't help myself. I needed to know more about the child.

“Who is the boy's father?” I admit, it was the wrong question to start out with, but I didn't want to believe it was Marren's.

A darkness clouded Okelo's face. I knew then just how grave of a mistake I had made by asking that question. It looked as though she was forcing back tears while looking at her son. She cradled him in her arms and used the thumb on her hand to gently stroke his temple. He
laid
still, though his eyes were focused on his mother.

“I'm sorry. That was extremely rude of me to ask.”

“It’s alright. I thought it would get easier with each day and that I would be able to freely speak of him without pain.” She sounded as though the pain made it hard to push her words out. I felt increasingly foolish for acting jealous in the first place. This woman had been through a lot.

“You really don't have to tell me, of all people.”

“Why not?”
The pain was gone, replaced with confusion.

I opened my mouth to say something intelligent and heartfelt, but only air escaped. 

She smiled,
then
looked at her baby. “He was killed right before Serid was born. It happened during a journey that is traditional of our people. The man leaves on a quest to prepare himself for entering fatherhood. When he returns, he helps the mother deliver her child and creates the first bond—the strongest bond, between the three of them. He never returned. I gave birth alone. It was hard, but I managed just fine, I think.” She looked up and smiled at me. “I assumed my mate's position as second—also tradition, though usually the son takes over, but you can see he's still a bit small for that.”

“I can't imagine losing Marren. The idea feels like it
would kill
me.”

“Well, that's because it will if it ever does happen. Heart songs are powerful in that, and other ways. But my mate and I weren't and for the better. I couldn't take the thought of Serid growing up alone.”

“That would be awful,” I said, feeling well enough to climb out of the pool to get dressed again, and then took a seat next to Okelo.

“Are you sure you don't want to hold him?” she asked.

My eyes met hers and I knew then that I had been caught staring at the child too long. “It's crazy, but I feel this strange pull towards him. I can't explain it.”

“Here,” she held him towards me, “Just support his head with the crook of your arm and his weight with your forearm.” I followed her directions—taking the child in my arms, shocked by how heavy he was. “See? Not so bad is it?”