Hand of Thorns (14 page)

He catches my attention enough to get me to look at him. His eyes look sad for once. "You didn't do this. I'm stressing myself out. I'm sorry. I should have been taking better care of myself, for your baby."

"The baby is fine. It's you I'm worried about."

"That's why you're here?"

He nods his head, like I should find that completely obvious at this point.

"I don't get it, Leon. What happened between us?"

Closing his eyes, I can see him fighting something with himself. "Not this again."

"Just cut to the chase. Give me an explanation and I'll never ask you again."

"Considering it's what probably put you in here," he sighs. "I'm attracted to you. More than attracted. I find you intriguing, and beautiful, and special. I want to know you more. I want to be with you more. I have to force myself into work so I stay away. I wanted to fuck you so unbelievably bad that I couldn't allow myself back at that hotel. Today when you fainted, Monica, I wanted to fucking hurt myself for allowing that to happen to you. So I don't know what is going on either, but the more I see you, the more I’m around you... the more I crave it. I want more of you."

"What if I want more of you, too?"

He shakes his head. "I told you, I'm no good for you."

"Beauty and the Beast."

"What?"

"You said you're no good for me, and you called me beautiful." I grin stupidly, but I love everything about what popped into my mind when he mentioned that once more. "Beauty and... the Beast. See, it works. It always works out in fairy tales."

"But this is no fairy tale, Monica. You see, you're pregnant with my child, a child that is to be born to Ellie and me. You have no part in that, except for carrying our baby and handing it over when it's born. Don't you see how fucked up that is? I can't give you all of me."

Looking down, I feel ashamed for my attempt at pulling him towards me. I know I shouldn't, I'm being absolutely ridiculous.

His curved finger presses gently against my chin, forcing it upward so I face him once again. "I'm not saying I don't want you. I do. I'm only saying it's going to end in a blazing fire. The rose at the end of the movie will wilt, there will be no happy ending."

"Then I'll prick my finger on a thorn, and I'll burn. With beauty comes pain, isn't that the idea of a rose? You risk your hand being pricked by a thorn, only to be able to smell the delicate aroma of the soft, gorgeous petals?"

His hand moves gently from my chin to my cheek, holding me precisely. "Then I'm going to kiss you." And he does. So simple, so soft, so sweet... so perfect.

Until the creaking of the door.

I quickly pull back, glancing over in its direction. Sumner stands there with a perfectly raised eyebrow and questions covering her face. "Sorry to interrupt," she says. She looks to me, then to Leon, and back around again. "I didn't realize you were awake yet. I forgot my purse."

She quickly races in but before she gets to where she was previously seated, Leon stands from the bed. "I have to go anyways, I'll talk to you later." Without another word he leaves the room, almost too fast.

"Spill." Sumner drops her purse at the end of the bed before taking the spot Leon just vacated. "How long has this been going on? And uh..." She takes a peek at my ever growing stomach. "How did you get impregnated?"

I want to start out by apologizing for everything that went wrong between us, but I like that we can pick up as though nothing happened, so I save my apologies for another time. Locking them away in a safe place, deep in my heart. Then I proceed to tell her everything that has happened from the moment we got our pedicures done together to now.

Her jaw remains slack for a majority of the story, then pretends to swoon. "What the fuck. No wonder you fainted. Who are you, and what the hell did you do with my hermit of a bestie?"

"Cute," I joke with her. "I'm so freaking confused, Sumer. What do I do?"

She shrugs. "Honestly. It's not like you can get knocked up." She chuckles to herself while I narrow my eyes. "Fine, fine. I don't know. My honest opinion is end it before it actually begins. Yes, you have the hots for him. Every girl in America does, even the lesbos. He is Leon fucking Owens." She fans herself mockingly. "He is drop dead gorgeous. But... he is also in a relationship. And those who will cheat with you..."

"Cheat on you," I finish her sentence. "I know, but I'm not looking for a relationship." Which is half true. I'm not looking for one, however I wouldn't complain if I had one. Especially with Leon. "It's fun. It's sexy. It's..."

"Leon Owens." This time Sumner finishes my sentence, with a pout. "I get it. I really do. If I were in your shoes, I'm pretty damn certain I'd be banging the shit out of him every chance I got, but this is you. You're the cautious one, the one who is extremely smart, the one who protects herself and everyone around her. You're not naive nor a mistress."

"Well, kind of," I admit.

Sumner rolls her eyes. "Yeah, but you have a chance to stop it. What is your heart telling you to do?"

"Go for him. That it's worth the chance of screwing my entire life up."

"And your head?"

"That I'm an idiot, but I'd be more of an idiot if I didn't try with him." I half-heartedly laugh.

Sumner reaches for my hand, gripping onto it. "I'm sorry I was a horrible friend, and I'm sorry I took off when you needed me the most. I think I was more envious of you than anything, but from here on out, poor decisions or not, I'm going to be by your side."

"Wait, you're apologizing? I was going to say I'm sorry."

"No need." She smiles, and it's as if all is right in the world. I've really missed Sumner.

"And why would you be envious? Do you not see the mess I'm in over all of this?"

"I do," she mildly jokes. "But what I saw the most was someone who knew what she wanted and took charge, uncaring of the consequences. I saw someone stand up for herself, regardless of the fear she had for what others thought or said. I saw strength and courage, and I was jealous."

"There is nothing to be jealous of."

"Um." She throws her hand in the direction of the door. "I have
one
thing to be jealous of!"

We get talking about her and Gunther, and how they've been, which appears to be better. I also scold her for the fourth of July and the whole idea of Ben. We get to talk about all the eventful things we've missed in one another's life, and sadly it was a summer missed between us, but we managed to do alright- and more than that, we managed to rekindle a friendship that shouldn't have been broken.

The nurse comes in to do vitals, and lets the doctor know I'm awake. Within the following hour I'm discharged. The first thing I do is go out to lunch with Sumner, with Mom attached to our hips. For how much of a mess my life has been lately, I finally feel at ease.

Sliding on a dress over my head, I glance towards the mirror. Is it possible I've gained five pounds over night? Nothing fits. Every dress is suddenly too short or stretches out weird, and every shirt wants my stomach to play peekaboo underneath. I would wear a sweatshirt, except that it's an unusually humid ninety five degree day for early September. It has been all week long, actually. I've gone to school each day this week in yoga shorts and a tank top, but currently even the tank tops look too tiny.

I'm still tiny everywhere except my stomach. People are definitely noticing every time I leave the house. I've heard it all lately. The rude ones such as kids shouldn't have kids, or that I'm probably having twins- which thankfully I'm not- or that I should know what I'm having already since I must be half way through my pregnancy. Sadly, I'm only shy of twelve weeks. I don't want to know how huge I'll be in the end.

Then there are the nice ones, like I'm glowing, or that pregnancy looks good on me, and a huge handful of congratulations. A few belly rubs to add with that as well.

Tossing my dress to the ground, I pad through the bedroom to my en suite bathroom in my tiny apartment, which is finally put together completely. I step on the scale to see that I haven't gained even an ounce, in fact I've lost two pounds. I'm not sure where that weight went, but that is what happens when you have a thyroid condition as I do. I'll have to inform the doctor when I go in next, but for now I have other things to focus on, such as what I'm going to wear.

My phone rings from the bedroom, so I race back in. "Hey," my voice rushes while I answer Sumner's call.

"Uh. Hi?"

"Sorry, I was in the other room, didn't want you to hang up."

"Oh. You ready? I'll be there in about ten minutes."

"Uh..."

"You're not ready?" She yells.

We have to meet Rochelle and Penelope. They're always early, and I'm always late, which they know. “It's not my fault this time. I have no clothes that fit me."

Sumner chuckles over the line. "Good thing I love shopping."

"We don't have time for shopping."

"I'll be there in ten." She hangs up, leaving it at that, so I pull a baggy tee-shirt from my pajama drawer and put that on. It remains baggy on me, so maybe I should consider wearing more oversized tee-shirts.

When Sumner knocks on the door several minutes earlier than I expect, I run towards the door in only a tee-shirt and underwear, since I haven't figured out which pair of unwashed shorts I'm going to wear yet.

Opening the door, my face flames in an instant. I guess it'd be different if my underwear weren't starch white, but there is nothing sexy about cotton underwear and a tee-shirt that says
Zero Fox Given
. Leon chuckles while he takes in my lack of clothing. "Sexy," he jokes.

Giving him a death stare while I pull down at the hem of my shirt to cover my undies, I ask, "What are you doing here?"

"I left the set early and I haven't seen you except once since you left the hospital. I wanted to surprise you."

"Well... surprise! I'm leaving."

He loses his smile in an instant. "Where are you going? You're not even dressed."

"Because nothing fits. I'm huge," I whine. "I'm having a girl’s weekend. I thought you were Sumner."

"That's what you wear to a girl's weekend?" He eyes my body once more, that side of his mouth lifts the way I adore. "Are pillow fights expected too?"

I shove at his shoulder for mocking me. "No. We usually drink, so honestly, I have no idea what we'll be doing, but it's long overdue and I know it'll be fun. Sumner is the planner of these things, not me."

He walks into my apartment without saying anything, then I realize... I never told him where I live. He's never been here. He must've looked through the file at Tranquil Mind. I don't bother asking, instead I follow after him. He heads straight for my bedroom, which isn't hard to find, as I only have four rooms in this entire place.

When he steps inside, he glances around, taking in the lack of decor on my walls, then he stares at the bed, clearing his throat before looking at me. "You need to put on shorts or something," he suggests demandingly.

"I was trying to find a shirt to wear. Nothing fits."

"Then buy bigger clothes, but you're not even big yet."

"Yeah, right." I pull my shirt up to reveal my belly. "Look."

He's already staring before I tell him to. A light flares in his eyes, something I wasn't expecting him to see. Honestly, I was expecting him to be disgusted by the pull of my skin and the fact that I no longer am a size two. He doesn't look at me like that though, he looks... turned on. "Don't ever call yourself huge again. And put on shorts." He turns towards my dresser to open up a couple drawers, only to close them once agian. "Where are your fucking shorts?"

I glance down at what I'm wearing, and apparently the white underwear aren't his specialty with how much he wants me to cover them up. I didn't exactly want him to see me in them, and if I had known he was at the door I would have been wearing something else. So I reach into the closet where my shorts are to grab the pair I wore yesterday. "I got it. Don't worry."

"Sorry," he mumbles. "I didn't mean to snap at you. I just can't look at you while you're wearing that."

"Gee, thanks." My heart starts to ache at the thought of him being disgusted by me for even a mere second.

He spins around with fierceness. "I can't look at you because you look incredible, and we're next to your bed, and you're in your underwear..." he takes him a second to say anything more. He stares at me intently, in a way that makes me realize he wasn't disgusted by me at all. In fact, I think I may have actually turned him on somehow. "And I want to fuck you, Monica."

"Oh." I stare at him, still hanging onto my shorts, not sure what to do at this point. I know I should put them on, but I feel more powerful with them off.

"Are you going to get dressed?" he asks between gritted teeth.

I shrug, because I'm not sure what to do, honestly. "I don't know."

"What do you mean, you don't know?" I watch as his pupils dilate. He wants something more, just as bad as I do. "If you don't get dressed, I'm not responsible for my actions." His smile spreads into a wicked grin. Everything below my stomach clenches. "You're being a bad girl, Monica. You're going to get punished."

"Okay," I practically moan breathlessly. "Punish me."

A groan escapes from his throat while he slowly turns his head side to side. "You're killing me." Then with ease, he steps towards me, lifting me up to wrap my legs around him. Turning us towards the bed, he pins me beneath him, kissing me with all his built up tension. He pushes forward, his erection rubbing against the throbbing feeling between my legs.

I dig at his back, reaching for the hem of his shirt so I can pull it off him. Except, everything that is burning hot cools off in an instant when Sumner shouts. "What the hell!"

Leon instantly stops kissing me, no longer thrusting into me, but he does continue to stay covered over me while he peeks over his shoulder to Sumner, who is covering her face. "Can you give us a second?"

She nods her head, turning towards the living room. "I brought you something for when you're finished Monica, but please don't take forever."

I'm still in too much shock to say anything, but when she closes the door I instantly start laughing. Leon glances back down at me, I can see the humor in his expression as well but he holds it back. "You think that's funny?"

I nod my head, biting down on my lip to suppress my smile, which still shows.

"Do you think it's funny now?" He thrusts his hips forward. In an instant I moan, even though I try to stop it. "Thought so." He climbs off from me, standing at the end of the bed while he adjusts his pants to make his erection less known. "Blue balls are a real thing, you know."

"I didn't say we had to stop," I plead.

"Oh, we do though." He looks towards the now closed bedroom door before glancing back over at me. "Now will you finally get dressed?"

"I guess," I say with a frown. Sliding off the bed, I pick up the shorts that had dropped when he took me in his arms, sliding them over my legs. "Well I was excited for the girl’s weekend, now I'm going to be devastated the whole time."

Leon presses his hand to my cheek, looking down at me with adoration. I don't think I'll ever get used to the feeling it gives me. "Why are you going to be devastated?"

"Knowing I could have stayed here and had sex with you."

He chuckles mildly, the air brushing against my skin. It makes me want to kiss him but I resist the urge. "If it makes you feel any better, I wasn't planning on doing anything except kiss you."

"Will you ever make love to me?" I ask, needing to know the answer.

I don't like how he stares at me, like he is unsure of the answer himself. "I don't make love, Monica," he says after a few seconds. "I fuck, I screw, I can make you come over and over, but I don't make love."

It shouldn't turn my insides into mush, as there was nothing romantic about what he said, but somehow I want to wrap up in a blanket with him and never let go. I almost hate how much I'm falling for him, and how soon he's consumed me, but I have zero control over how my heart, body, and mind all react to Leon.

When I don't say anything, he glides his hand to the nape of my neck, curling his fingers into skin. "I want to fuck you," he says in a whispered tone. "But not yet. Because when I do, I want time to savor the feeling of your pussy around my cock. I want to taste you inside and out. I want to explore your body with mine. I'm not going to have a quickie with you then send you on your way. I want to own your body with mine. Okay?"

I nod my head to answer Leon. He fights himself with something while he glances back and forth between my eyes. I want to know what, but as usual, I don't ask him. He's given me so much more than I ever expected already.

After a moment, he leans in and delicately places a kiss on my lips. "Where are you going for the weekend?" he asks before kissing me once more.

His hand slides down my shoulder and arm, holding my hand when he reaches it. It sends chills down my spine in the absolute best way. "You'll have to ask Sumner. It's my birthday tomorrow, so I think she's trying to surprise me."

"It's your birthday tomorrow? Why didn't you tell me before now?"

"I figured you knew."

"Why would I know that?"

"You found out where I live magically, I figured you read over all my paperwork."

"I'm doing something for you birthday then," he says, ignoring my remark. "I'll be right back." Dropping my hand, he walks out towards the living room. I follow after him.

Sumner sits on the couch, looking extremely bored while she plays on her phone. She glances up at us, curling her lip. "Well, at least you made it fast."

"Where are you guys going to be tomorrow?" Leon asks, ignoring her statement as well.

"Uh, it's a surprise." She glances over at me. "I didn't want to tell Monica."

Leon looks at me. "Go to your room, please."

"What? No."

"Actually, here." Sumner picks a gift bag up from the floor and holds it towards me. "I got you a few cute shirts I thought would fit you. Try those on, and I'll talk with your
friend
here." She smirks like she's winning something over on us.

I grab the bag and look in. "Why did you do this?"

"Because I love shopping and you need shirts."

"You didn't have to do this," I argue.

At same time, both Leon and Sumner simultaneously order me to try on the clothes. I purse my lips together rather than arguing, then turn on my heels to try on the clothes. I want to hear what they’re saying, but I think they're whispering out the details to one another. I am beyond curious what they have planned. Maybe Sumner will drink tonight and I can get the details of it all.

She bought me seven shirts, all with enough stretch or material to cover what I have for a belly, and hopefully will fit me for a few months. I try them all on quickly, then keep the final one on, packing the rest in my duffle bag along with a few pair of shorts, all of which need to be washed. I don't have a washer and dryer, so I go to Mom's every week to wash whatever I wore the previous week.

Grabbing my duffle bag quickly, making sure I have my charger, phone, and purse, I exit the room to try to hear something about their plans, but they're both sitting on the couch casually. I give them equal glares. Sumner grins stupidly at me, while Leon looks breathless.

"You look beautiful." His words float in the air, surrounding me with warmth all over. Standing up, he walks over to take my duffle bag, pressing a kiss to my forehead. "You shouldn't be carrying this. I'll put it next to your friend’s car, then I'll let you have a good night."

He starts to walk away, as he always does. I need more from him. "Are you ready?" I ask Sumner, but before she answers me I go in the same direction as Leon. I'm on the second floor, and he's already at the bottom of the steps when I get outside.