Authors: R. K. Lilley
I woke up from my nap as the plane began to descend for landing, the feeling familiar enough to act like an alarm on my body.
My head was pillowed against Stephan’s shoulder.
I rubbed my cheek against that supple muscle before pulling back to look at him.
His arms were crossed over his chest, making his muscles bulge attractively.
He was smiling and awake.
He looked as happy as I’d ever seen him.
It was a good sight for my heart, especially after all of the drama from the night before.
I saw that Javier was still passed out; his head pillowed onto Stephan’s other shoulder.
“Morning, Buttercup,” Stephan said softly.
“Just sitting here smiling while we sleep on you?” I asked him with a smile.
He just flashed a dimple at me, nodding.
“Sandwiched by my two favorite people in the world.
What’s not to smile about?”
I had to laugh.
“So what happened last night?” I asked him.
I didn’t want to ruin the mood, but I needed to know.
That had been a lot of drama to be squashed so easily.
“Javier said he loves me,” he said with a very soft smile.
I was relieved and confused all at once.
“What about before that?”
He grimaced and told me briefly about Vance and the way he’d bullied Javier.
I gripped his hand when he finished.
I wasn’t sure what to think about all of it.
Javier did have a reputation for loving drama, but on the other hand, I’d met Vance, and that one lived and breathed the stuff.
I did know one thing, though.
Stephan believed Javier with a certainty, and he would feel horrible for not defending the other man
—
instead walking away when he was being harassed.
“If that was what really happened, you couldn’t have known.”
He gave me a stern look.
“You don’t believe that’s what happened?”
I gave him my little shrug.
“You know I’m more cynical than you.
I don’t know what to believe, but of course, I have my doubts.
That doesn’t matter, though.
If you’re together, I support that, because it’s what you want.”
He gave me a sad smile.
“You shouldn’t be so cynical.
I have no doubts about Javier, Bianca.”
I nodded, watching him carefully.
“I know.
And like I said, that’s enough for me.”
“When are you going to learn that I’m not the only trustworthy person in the world?”
I didn’t have an answer for that.
At least, not one that he wanted to hear.
Nothing but time and consistency would make me trust Javier with Stephan’s heart, and the drama of the night before had done nothing but set that time further back, whatever his story was.
“You don’t think he’s good enough for me,” he said, clear reproof in his voice.
I had to smile at that.
“I don’t think
anyone
is good enough for you, myself included.”
He just shook his head.
We’d been over this, and neither of us ever budged.
“I told James that I love him,” I told him quietly.
I heard the familiar sound of the wheels coming down from the plane.
I was surprised that Javier was still sleeping peacefully.
Stephan beamed at me.
“That’s wonderful.
Your therapist would be proud.”
I laughed, hardly offended, since he only spoke the truth.
“Aren’t you going to ask me what
he
said?” I asked him.
He shook his head without hesitation.
“He’s been head over heels from the start, Buttercup.
I had no doubts.
That man worships the ground you walk on.”
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Mr. Callous
We had almost no downtime once we got to Las Vegas.
Javier and Stephan said a quick and circumspect goodbye, though I could practically see the heat snapping between them.
We shuttled to our airline’s headquarters, checked in, and prepped for our flight, though that entire process was hardly uneventful.
All of the other crews that we greeted were abuzz with the recent announcement that our airline had filed for Chapter eleven bankruptcy.
We were still in business for the moment, but speculation as to what that meant for us was running rampant.
I was mostly in shock about the whole thing.
Stephan and I shared a very long look that meant we would talk about it later.
The shuttle we took back to the airport was so loud with everyone voicing opinions and fears that we couldn’t have heard each other over the noise if we’d tried.
I texted James.
Bianca:
Did you hear the news about the airline?
James:
Yes.
Can you talk on the phone right now?
Bianca:
It’s too loud on the bus.
I’ll call you from the plane.
I had a few brief minutes to call him once we got on the plane, between prep time and boarding.
He was very much Mr. Cavendish when he answered the phone.
“Hello, Bianca.”
“Hello, Mr. Cavendish,” I said, because I knew who I was talking to.
“What do you think of all this bankruptcy stuff?
I don’t know what any of it means.
It sounds really bad, but people are saying that we could still stay in business.”
I heard his audible sigh over the line.
It didn’t bode well.
“If you want my candid professional opinion on the matter, what it means is that the airline will stay in business for around a year before its fleet of aircrafts will be grounded for good.
Your CEO has exhausted literally every avenue of funding at his disposal, gone to every connection, large and small, that he has.
He refuses to give up control of the airline, and he’s never run one successfully, though he has tried several times.
He approached me about funding, which is actually why I was on the flight where I met you, but I had to decline based solely on the fact that it would have been a disastrous business decision for me.
He was not willing to make any leadership concessions, and I wasn’t willing to throw a hundred mil away on a man with a clear history of failure.”
“In the near future,” he continued relentlessly.
“Say the next days and weeks, you will most likely be given an option for a voluntary furlough, and if that fails to yield enough willing candidates, an involuntary one.
The airline will be cutting costs and staffing.
Any routes that aren’t profitable will be aborted within the next month.
Any other questions?”
I felt deflated by his revelations, though I didn’t doubt for a second that he knew what he was talking about.
“Did you know all along that this was going to happen?”
“Yes,” he said with no hesitation.
“It was all only a countdown.
The airline has been hemorrhaging money from the start.
This is the era of discount fares, and your airline was a start-up luxury carrier.
Everyone in the industry is just surprised that it lasted this long.
Have you given any more thought to your painting career?
Just say the word, and I’ll have my people prepare your showing.”
I thought that was rather callous of him.
Of the two of us, I’d thought I had the monopoly on being insensitive.
“I have not,” I told him, my voice stiff.
“I haven’t had time to process any of this.”
There was a long pause on the other end.
“Well, I will leave you to it then.
I need to go.
I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Goodbye, Mr. Cavendish,” I said coldly, wondering at his mood.
When I had called him, I hadn’t expected to talk to this callous man.
“Goodbye, Bianca.”
I hung up, feeling a little stung at his cold manner.
Was my hesitation about showing my paintings really bothering him this much?
Or was it something else?
Whatever was going on with Roger, perhaps?
I knew speculating was pointless, so I got to work.
It bothered me persistently, though.
Not knowing the cause for his distant demeanor left my mind free to run wild with possibilities and paranoid fears, each one more alarming than the last.
I tried my hardest to distract myself for the duration of the flight.
It was at least full, my bodyguards in each cabin included, of course.
Even full, though, I was left with nothing to do by halfway into the flight.
Damien and Murphy had been uncharacteristically quiet for the pre-board procedures and the flight.
I knew they must be upset about the bad news.
If they started at another airline, they likely wouldn’t get to work together for years.
Damien would probably be demoted to the first officer position, making it impossible for them to work the same flights.
Even after he made captain again, it would take time for them to get enough seniority to get regular routes, let alone routes together.
I was sad for them.
They made such a fun team.
I visited with them in the flight deck for a while.
They still joked nonstop and went to great efforts to charm me, but I sensed an undercurrent of tension in the two men.
This was what upset me most about the collapse of the airline.
It wasn’t so much my future that I feared for.
I liked my job, and I was grateful for the opportunities it had given me, but I was a survivor.
Even without James, I would find another way to get by.
But the people who had put all of their hopes into the airline for four and a half years, the ones who would be most affected by it, that’s what got me.
Businessmen played with their monopoly money while the rest of us rolled with the punches.
It made me angry.
Of course, there was nothing to do for any of it, so it was a futile kind of anger.
I had a long talk with Stephan on the flight about the expected voluntary furlough.
I had made a quick but tough decision about it.
I broached the subject with trepidation, but as usual, Stephan only responded with his unconditional support.
He just cupped my shoulders in his big gentle hands, giving me his best smile.
“I think that makes
perfect
sense, Bianca.
You were dreading telling me, weren’t you?”
I nodded.
He kissed my forehead.
“You should know better,” he scolded softly.
He was right.
God, I loved him
.
How did I get so lucky?
I was tired and exhausted by the time we got to New York, my mind running me ragged with all of the imminent changes in my life.
Just when I made one huge change, didn’t it just figure that it would
all
have to start changing?
I wasn’t sure what the plan was when we walked as a crew out to the pickup spot.
James, or rather, Cold Mr. Cavendish, hadn’t said.
I figured if he sent a car, I’d take it, if not, I’d go to the hotel with the crew.
He had sent a car.
In fact, he’d sent himself, I realized as he met me at the door, taking my bag and my arm without a word.
His face was a beautiful mask, his eyes a little blank.
James nodded stiffly at Stephan.
Stephan had to stay with the crew for the hotel check-in, so he kissed me on the forehead and said goodbye.
I didn’t get a chance to say goodbye to anyone else since James was leading me away as soon as he had Stephan’s assumed blessing.
He handed my bags off to Clark, handing me into the car swiftly.
My security detail filed into the car mere moments after James and I were settled.
They’d been my silent shadow for the duration of my commute and workday.
“Bodyguards are unnecessary when I’m working, James,” I told him, my voice pitched low to keep the conversation private.
“I’m quite safe at work.”
He looked at me.
It was the first direct look he’d given me since he’d met me at the door.
His face was as unreadable as I’d ever seen it.
“I find it very necessary,” he said shortly.
He looked out the window.
I hated his mood, hated his distance, but it still made me want to cling to him.
I knew how unhealthy that urge was, and I tried my best to squelch it.
Still, I found my hand seeking his knee, rubbing it comfortingly.
It did not have the intended effect.
His hand covered mine instantly, pushing it hard into his leg.
I couldn’t have pulled it away if I’d tried.
“You in the mood to be pinned to the seat and fucked with an audience, Love?” he said, his voice soft with danger.
I tried to snatch my hand away, but he held it fast.
I didn’t answer the ridiculous question, and he didn’t say another word, looking out the window, a storm in his eyes.
“Are you going to tell me what’s going on with you?” I finally asked him quietly.
He squeezed my hand, his jaw working.
“Bear with me, Bianca.
I am going through some rather trying legal issues, and letting you leave me every week tests every last
ounce
of my self-control.”
I was silent for a long time, debating if I should tell him about my decision.
It seemed rather like rewarding his bad behavior just then, but I had already made up my mind.
It just made sense, as much as I hadn’t wanted it to.
The voluntary furlough for flight attendants had already been announced.
I’d received the email as we were taxiing into JFK.
I had the seniority to keep working even if there weren’t enough people to sign up for the voluntary furlough and it became involuntary, but I saw that as such a selfish thing.
I didn’t need the job, not as much as so many others did.
Perhaps there had only ever been this solution, and the bankruptcy was just forcing my hand more quickly.
I suspected that might be the case, but it didn’t really matter anymore.
“I’ll be taking the voluntary furlough,” I told him.
I saw his hand shake with a fine tremor.
He didn’t look at me.
I understood that he didn’t appreciate that we weren’t alone just then.
“Thank you,” he said very quietly, in an unsteady voice.
“I’m doing it because I feel ridiculous having more money spent to protect me at work than what I’m actually making.
And because there are people that need the job more than I do,” I told him, my tone hard.
This was
not
because of his tantrum.
“And I would like to begin planning the gallery showing.”
He nodded, head still turned away.
“Of course.
Thank you.
I’ll set up a meeting for you with Danika when we’re in Vegas.
She manages both my L.A. and Las Vegas galleries.
She went to bat against my New York team to get your work in her gallery.
She’s quite a fan.”
I had a hard time believing that.
The idea of having fans was too far-fetched of a concept for me to grasp easily.
We arrived at our place via the underground garage, and James walked me into the apartment and up to our room.
He watched me from the doorway of the closet as I got undressed for my nap.
“I can’t linger.
I really do need to get back to the hotel, since I’ll be heading back to Las Vegas with you tomorrow.”
I just nodded, half undressed, my back to him.
I felt him watching me for long minutes before he left.
I got ready for bed and lay down to sleep, but it eluded me for a long time.
The way James was acting filled me with tension and anxiety.
I tried to tell myself that he was just a moody and unpredictable man.
That was one of the first things I’d learned about him.
But I just knew, deep down in my gut, that it was something bad, something that he felt threatened him, or perhaps threatened us.
He had told Roger to offer his entire fortune to protect from the mysterious threat, and I knew that he wouldn’t use those words lightly.