Gravity (30 page)

Jake grabs some
beers
and hands them to us. I
take both and hands Gabriel his.

"Beer
pong?
" Pete reaches in his
pocket, glaring at me and Gabriel for a challenge.

Alex starts
raising his hands up as if he made a goal. "Beer Pong! Set the
table!" He shouts to the room.

I
know beer pong from my brother Cedric
and I know there’s no way Jake and Pete will win. I've got a knack
for precision throwing.

Setting
up
the table, Gabriel inch
closer. He’s staring at his bottle, worried about drinking. He went
overboard at the concert chasing Violet around. “You’re alright,
trust me. Have faith in yourself,” I say under my
breath.

"Well, at least I
know this won't fill itself." He says under his breath.

I feel bad
about the night of the concert. I just wanted us to have fun. I
hold the ping pong balls in my hand as Jake places six red cups
into the usual triangle on each side of the table; three, then two
then lastly one pointing towards the table center. Alex fills the
cups a quarter of the way, spilling a little because of his
unsteady hands. I concentrate on the balls in my hands feeling
their weight and calculating. I bounce them one by one placing more
and more of my energy with the ping pong balls. I grin at Gabriel.
He sees the aura around them as I leave my own energy trace upon
them.

"Cheater."
Gabriel nudges me. My grin disappears as I realized that it is
cheating. I will have control of the balls this way. I frown and
hand them to Gabriel to let the energy dissipate.

The game begins
and even in their drunken state Jake and Pete are tearing us a new
one.

"Shit
!"

Pete’s throw
lands in another cup
. Gabriel
has to drink another. The beer is punishing him hard. I feel okay.
Somehow the alcohol isn’t as effective with me as it is with
Gabriel.

"You okay?" I
say under my breath.

"Barely." He's
reaching the point where he will no longer will be able to hold
back his aura if we don't slow the other two down.

"You're doing great,
Gabriel."

"And you're playing
like shit."

I take
the ball on my turn and feel it out
again, grinding my teeth. Jake points his finger at me like a gun.
Alex bobs his head to the music as he watches his old friends
battle his new ones. Girls cling to him like bees to honey. He
seems to be getting bored as his attention is drawn to the big
breasted one filling his cup.

I
rub the ball, giving it my energy for
the perfect bounce straight into the first cup. With each game,
Jake and Pete's triangle is knocked out one by one. Their ball
throws are not as direct as before; spinning off the rims or
missing them entirely. The beer is affecting their game and their
spirit is plummeting.

For Alex,
t
he game isn't as exciting as
sucking face's with a girl wrapped in his arm. Gabriel notices
after his turn, looking at me with the same puzzled look.
What about Violet?
Gabriel shrugs contently at the idea of Violet
leaving Alex's mind. But I'm as dismissive as Gabriel. Alex likes
Violet. Why is he kissing a random girl? I remember at the diner he
did the same thing. It seems Alex is an 'in the moment' type of
guy.

***

Alex

Dash eyes me.
Somehow his thoughts make it through. The mind numbing music I'm
used to getting away from myself with, mellows.

What are you doing
Alex?

Forgetting.

Forgetting what?

I
ignore him and look at the pretty
brunette I have my hands on. She isn't remotely as beautiful as
Violet, but that’s the problem. Someone better than Violet will be
able to destroy her hold on me. It seems like an impossible task
for the poor girl. Her blue eyes play coy but her hands aren't as
bashful, running up my abdomen. Violet never touched me and
she probably never
will
.

I'm pissed at
my
own heart. I take the
girl's hand and head to my parent’s bedroom. She doesn't waste any
time which I like. We kiss. She tastes like cherry flavored
candy—too sweet.

O
h my God, I
can't believe this
,
s
he celebrates.

I
avoid kissing her too much to avoid
her overly-sweetened flavor. Her hands annoyingly hold my face in
place. I push her on my parent’s bed and take my shirt off. She
watch's me like she's won a prize—a facial expression I let my ego
feed on. The boost reminds me that I'm free to do what I want and I
can have anyone I want. Right now I want to fuck. I climb on top of
the blue-eyed cutie claiming her as mine for now.

Oh
my God. Oh My God...
Her voice
is trying to make sense of reality. I get that a lot.

I
kiss her overly candied mouth,
listening to her mind; she's unaware of my eavesdropping. Her mind
is more distracting than I wish as I pull out a condom and prepare
to take her.

He's
so hot.
She looks up at me.
Her compliments are on repeat.

She really
want
s this. She's
wanted
this
with
me
since
eighth grade. I don't know her, but she knows me. We share classes
together. I'm uncomfortable knowing this and try listening to the
surrounding room activity as I wedges between her thighs, but her
overjoyed thoughts are making me think twice. I've never thought
twice. Her big blue eyes stare up at me in awe as her thoughts
parade around in celebration.

I can't believe this
is happening. This is really happening.

I
find my entry.

I thrust
into her fully as her last thought
comes out as a deep exhale into her agape mouth, paralyzing my
body.

My first time...
Alex Aisling.

I look
down at her huge black pupils.
A Virgin?
This never bothered me before.

M
y conscience rise out of
the depths of my drunken mind telling me this is not right. I look
away from her face closing my eyes. I can't look at her. I can't
listen to her talk about me like this. I'm anything but
Amazing, Alex the Great,
Alex the Greatest.
But I can't
say no to this. This is who I've always been.

Thrusting
into her, her
mind is busy experiencing me and I can focus more on my bodily
sensations. The feeling of breaking her is not what I want, but she
wants me and I need her. She has to help me recover.

My
guilty thrusts make me angry at
myself for using the innocent girl to erase the fact I'm losing
myself. Sinking deeper into the girl, I'm sinking deeper into
regret. Violet had
fucked with
my heart
; I've fallen for her
bad. I have no idea if
fucking
this poor girl
will help erase
that.

With my eyes
shut I refocus on the girl under me. I imagine Violet beneath me.
The blue-eyed cutie becomes my brown-eyed desire. My hand brushes
her cheek as I feel the girl around me.
Would she feel like this?
I savor the feeling.
My imagination gets me excited too quickly.

"Oh, Alex!" The
girl cries
out.

Violet!

The sound of
her name echoes through
my
mind as I pour forth my offering. It leaves me empty as my eyes
open to the girl whose name is not Violet. She smiles up at me in
worship. I realize what I had done is far worst then having sex
with a girl I don't have feelings for. I used her and taken
something I had no right to take.

I
regretfully look into her eyes. "I'm
sorry." I remove myself from her.

"Why? Alex?!"

I put my
clothes back on, leaving her on my parent's bed alone.

Dash

Jake and Pete
a
re hammered pretty bad from
beer pong. I'm still pretty sober, but I decide not to play
anymore. Instead, Gabriel goes against someone else without me.
He's doing well as he has a feel for his new talent, throwing ping
pongs in cups. His confidence makes him move his body more openly
which keeps me watchful for his sake. I feel odd keeping girls away
from his side of the table as he plays and wonder if it looks like
there's something between us.

Finishing another winning game, we decide to
let someone else play.

"Tha
t was so much fun."
Gabriel says, wide-eyed. "I'm so glad I came."

"Me
too."
I say. "You got me
worried for a while there."

"I'm fine. I
feel great." He places his hands in his back pockets standing
straighter than I've ever seen him. "What else can we do
here?"

"Yeah, man nice
game!" A guy opens a bottle of beer and hands it to Gabriel.

"Thanks!"
Gabriel
takes it without
flinching. He's got himself contained.

The party keeps
on going like a well-oiled machine. Non-stop music and a steady
flow of new faces appear. I stand glued beside Gabriel who makes
conversation with another comic enthusiast. It's interesting to
hear the things I already know about him just from his bedroom. I
feel lucky to confirm those things.

A new face
catches Gabriel's attention. He ends his conversation with the
comic guy and awkwardly backs away, removing his hands from his
back pockets and into his front pockets. His eyes are glued across
the room. I follow his gaze. Another guy across the room is staring
at him. A smile of recognition registers with the
stranger.

"Dash, I need to get
out of here, now!"

I
hear the panic in his voice. "What is
it?" I ask, but Gabriel heads for the door.

"Gabriel!" The
guy from across the room walks over.

Gabriel halts
and reluctantly turns to meet him.

"Josh." He says
in a nervous sigh. His eyes avoid looking at him directly, but Josh
is more than excited to see Gabriel—he's enthralled.

"What happened?
I
haven't seen you in like
forever." A hint of devastation is in his tone. I observe Gabriel's
body beginning to slouch. Whoever Josh is makes Gabriel very
uncomfortable.

"Hey. I’m Josh,
Gabriel’s best friend." Josh gives a weak smile and his eyes
quickly access me from head to toe. I do the same. I notice that
there's something about Josh that seems constrained. Gabriel nods
confirming what Josh is saying.

I thought Gabriel didn't have any friends.
Gabriel’s eyes meet mine and I read him instantly.
'Don’t be
mad'.

“I’m Dash. Gabriel and I met through Alex, a
mutual friend.”

“Mutual friend. How’d you meet Alex?” Josh
aims his question at Gabriel. He’s not convinced.

Gabriel’s head
bows.

“
Through
another friend.” I answer for him. “You wouldn’t know her. She
doesn’t live around here.”

Josh’s lips
purse.

“
So, I'll talk
to you later." I smiles at Gabriel as if to end a conversation we
were having before Josh interrupted. Gabriel's eyes tell me
'please don't leave
me'
. I nod reassuringly and
walk away, but not to too far. I will stay close to listen and to
come to Gabriel's aide just in case. I'm curious about
this Josh.
If he is Gabriel's best friend, he
should tie that end—especially if he makes him feel so
uncomfortable.

"What
happened?" Josh
asks again as
his eyes shift everywhere in the room and lastly Gabriel. "Did you
leave school?"

"Yeah. I left
school."

"Look
, it's kinda noisy
in here. You want talk outside?"

Gabriel nods.
Not that he looks any better for leaving the party. I give him a
reassuring nod. I'll be close.

Josh and
Gabriel find a quieter spot on the side of the house. I'm around
the corner, out of Josh's sight, listening.

"About that
night?"
Josh says.

“
Lower your
voice.” Gabriel’s hands come out of his pockets and his eyes meet
mine for a split second. It seems whatever they're talking about
Gabriel doesn’t want me to know. Luckily I have high sensitivity to
my five senses thanks to Red.

"What about
it?" Gabriel's tone changes slightly. His breathing is a little too
fast for normal. It takes me a moment to notice, but Josh's body
shows every sign of interest in Gabriel—not as a friend.

"I can't stop
thinking about you
."

"Josh—"

"No, let me
finish." Josh moves closer. There are only inches between them. "I
know it’s you that makes me feel like this. After that night, I
can't stop thinking about you."

Through the
branches of the bushes I watch as Gabriel's eyes redden with
grief.