Goddess (28 page)

Without another word Falza bent and effortlessly picked up the slim frame of his dead wife. He crossed the bridge to the barge and laid Angeline on the deck beneath the awning. Herezah wanted to believe she heard him stifle a sob but his grave countenance gave away nothing
as he sombrely untied the barge, turned his back on the Percherese and pushed off the bank. The barge rocked momentarily and then felt the pull of the river’s journey towards the Faranel and gave itself over to the smooth waters that would take them back to sea.

An Elim guard helped her up from her knees but Herezah’s gaze didn’t leave King Falza’s back. She watched him steer the barge until the river was empty. And then she wept.

Lazar had been following Pez’s directions implicitly and they were on course for Arafanz’s fortress. As the night of the seventh day set in, the group had fallen into an almost constant but relatively comfortable silence as Lazar remembered what had happened on the previous journey. Ultimately everyone settled into the routine. The desert alone was in charge; all of them, royal or peasant, had to kneel to the might of the sands and its ferocious sun.

Maliz had certainly left him alone but Lazar was still puzzled by Boaz, who seemed sulky and uncharacteristically withdrawn. Ganya was animated, however, and was certainly exacting her price for helping him to stay in touch with Pez. She had no shame and it would be no different tonight after his talk with Pez. They awaited the owl now.

‘The man you call Tariq observes you closely.’

‘Do you think he wants my body?’ Lazar asked playfully despite his mood. He enjoyed hearing her throaty laugh.

‘I know I do,’ she replied, rubbing herself against him. ‘I shall miss these nights of ours when
this journey is done. But I suspect you won’t.’ She laid a hand against his mouth when he opened it to speak. ‘No, don’t answer that. It needs no response. I understand our arrangement.’

He obeyed her request, remaining silent.

‘Tariq means you harm,’ she added.

‘He always has.’

‘Lazar, pay attention. I don’t mean with fists or blades—with those he is no match for you, and he knows it. But he will hurt you in other ways—by more sinister means.’

‘What have you seen?’

‘Not much. But he is a darkness in your life—he troubles you. In fact, he frightens you.’

Lazar looked down, knowing she was right, amazed that she saw so much. ‘He is not a good man,’ was all he was prepared to say.

‘He is worse. He is very much your enemy—and enemy to Iridor.’

‘I know.’

‘And still you allow him to travel with you.’

‘There is a saying about keeping friends close but enemies closer still.’

She nodded. ‘I have heard it. And there is truth to it. But he is no help to you. It would be better for you to arrange his death, by accident, if necessary.’

Lazar sighed. ‘I wish it were that easy.’

‘Why is it not? Who here can trouble you? My father and I? A boy who dreams of being a soldier?’

‘What do you see in the boy?’

‘Goodness, but there is something troubling him—a darkness in his heart. He hides it.’

Lazar nodded.

‘But answer me: why can’t you just kill Tariq?’

‘It is more complex than you imagine.’

‘Tell me.’

‘No. It is dangerous for you to know.’

‘Dangerous? I am not frightened of an old man. I want to know who he is and why you are so careful about him.’

‘Don’t be fooled by outward appearances, Ganya, and stay clear of him.’

The owl arrived, preventing any further discussion. He flew without hesitation to land next to Ganya, who kneeled and welcomed him, laying her hand gently on him. Lazar obediently knelt beside her and offered his own hand. They gave Ganya a few moments to find the silence within that she needed, her speed at moving into a trance-like state not failing to astonish Lazar.

We are here
, Iridor said without preamble.

Here!
Lazar couldn’t hide his shock.

That’s why I told you to stop at this point for the night. I would say an hour’s ride north and you’ll be able to see the fortress.

How is it guarded?

Lazar, I won’t lie to you. There are dozens and dozens of men. All of them are prepared to go to their death to defend a personal honour that is somehow wrapped up with Lyana. I don’t understand it either,
he said, acknowledging his friend’s deep frown of consternation.

Lyana?

Apparently. I know too little. From the brief time I watched them I didn’t derive anything that told me they worshipped her. It was only when Arafanz ordered the death of his own men that day at the fortress, in front of Ana, that I realised they were shouting battle cries in honour of the Goddess. I can’t make sense of it.

Is that why they stole Ana?

Who knows? Arafanz is hardly an ally, t hough. Don’t be fooled. He intends to kill Boaz.

I don’t care about Arafanz, anyway. He can die on the end of my sword. I’m here only for Ana.

Well, you’re going to see her very soon. I flew ahead yesterday, tried to glean whatever fresh information I could.

And?

The baby must be due any day. I heard her talking about pain
.

Lazar sighed.
She’s early then. We are just on eight moons since she left Percheron. This adds a fresh complication. I thought it would be hard enough with her heavily pregnant but it’s going to be far more fraught if the baby is born.

Or worse if she is labouring for it
.

Lazar frowned deeper still.
We have no choice. I want her back!

To return her to Boaz, of course,
Iridor finished gently.

Lazar glared at him.
Of course
.

Good.

What’s that supposed to mean?

Iridor sighed softly in his mind.
You must let her go, Lazar
.

I have! She’s married to the Zar. I have no hold over her
.

That may be, but she has a hold over your heart. Don’t deny it. Once you rescue her from the rebel, you must—

The rebel?

That’s how he sees himself. Lazar, whatever happened between you and Ana is—

Enough! What else can you tell me about this ‘rebel’?

Iridor didn’t respond immediately.

Well, come on, time is short. What can you tell me that can help us?

Nothing. He sends out riders at random and in no set direction. Guards are everywhere. There is nothing I can tell you that can prepare you. I don’t even know how to suggest you gain access to the fortress, other than to do so under cover of darkness. I will be your eyes.

Lazar nodded.
I will die if I must to save her.

Iridor remained silent.

Lazar’s eyes narrowed.
There’s more, isn’t there? There’s something you’re reluctant to say. Nothing you tell me can surprise me. Nothing can hurt me more than I’ve already been hurt.

Are you sure?

Lazar stared at the owl, suddenly unnerved.
What do you know?

Lazar,
Iridor began plaintively, hesitantly.

Tell me! What are you hiding?

Ana is Boaz’s wife,
Iridor said.
You’ve already accepted this.

Well, thank you for reminding me of that critical piece of information
, Lazar said, unable to hide his sarcasm.
What is your point?

My point, Lazar, is that Ana does not belong to you. She never has!

A new voice entered their minds.
But in his heart she does,
Ganya said to Iridor.
Ana has always been his.

They both flinched at her interruption, shocked that she could enter their private discussion.

Lazar felt lightheaded. Her few gently spoken words drew a rush of emotion within him. It felt as though she were looking into his soul; he hated that she could hear his treacherous thoughts, see his beguilement written all over his troubled heart.
We did not realise you could join us
, he said.

Neither did I. But there is so much emotion emanating from you, Lazar, that it is not hard to follow. It is a beacon, guiding me into this private domain of Iridor’s magic that I protect with my own. Forgive me for speaking out of turn but Iridor continues to protect you from yourself, Lazar. He hides the truth through reluctance to hurt you.

What is she talking about
? Lazar demanded of the owl.

You must tell him,
Ganya urged.

The owl’s head swivelled and its grave countenance fell upon Ganya. Iridor’s voice
sounded uncharacteristically cold when he replied.
Then he will not like hearing that either she or the rebel, or both, have given their hearts to each other. I saw Arafanz embracing Ana early this morning on the rooftop of the fortress.

Lazar felt his world spin. He allowed his thoughts to explode in accusation.
You lie!

No. I am very sorry to say that I do not
, Iridor replied sorrowfully.
I have seen them together
.

Then she is being forced against her will
.

It did not appear that way to me, Lazar. Ana is a free spirit. As young as she was when we first met her, I believe she did love you. In your absence there is no doubting her fondness for Boaz. And now, with neither of you in her life, she has moved her affections to Arafanz. Whether he is coercing her is beside the point. You must understand that Ana does not struggle beneath his touch. I would be lying to you if I said she behaved in any other way than to ‘suffer’ it happily
.

Lazar broke their link, flinging Ganya’s hand away as he stood and stomped a few paces from them. He breathed hard, trying to make sense of what he’d just heard.

We should leave him
, Ganya said to Iridor.
I
—she sounded embarrassed.
I can’t help but sense the personal war that goes on inside his heart
.

He has loved her since the moment he first set eyes on her but he denies it so much it is like a disease that consumes him. It festers and wounds
.

I know. Perhaps Lazar is more comfortable with feeling wounded by the world and constantly angry at it.

Ganya, you have more insight than a hundred people twice your age.

She smiled at the owl.
But we need him strong, do we not?

Indeed. The heir to the throne is in Ana’s belly. I don’t know what Lyana requires of us but I sense we must do our utmost to rescue the Zaradine and her child. Lazar alone has the ability to do so.

He’s that capable?

Ask your father
.

The Spur is watching us
, she said furtively.

That’s because he knows we are talking privately about him.

Lazar could sense that Iridor and Ganya were discussing his anger, but he didn’t care. Iridor’s news had ripped through his mind like a fiery arrow, igniting rage along its flight. But the resulting fury was burning with a cold flame now. All the heat had gone and what was left was pure and cold wrath.

He returned to his friends and grasped Ganya’s hand, instantly feeling the reconnection to Iridor in his mind. He knew Ganya would listen to all that they shared as though some sort of unspoken permission had been granted. It mattered not to him, and he began by addressing them both.
Whatever Ana’s personal choices might be is irrelevant. I am charged by the Zar to do everything in
my power to return the Zaradine and her child to the Stone Palace, whether she likes it or not. I am prepared to die in the effort to carry out my duty.

Naturally
, Iridor said, a fraction disdainfully, and then added more softly with a sigh,
Lazar, I had to warn you in case—

Don’t think on it again. I’m sure your eyes did not deceive you. Ana is young and emotionally vulnerable. In light of all she has faced in her time at the palace, we shouldn’t be surprised if she attaches herself to anyone who has a kind word for her. Arafanz clearly never had any intention of hurting her, and he is likely manipulating her emotions.
His own words felt intensely hollow and it didn’t surprise him that neither Iridor nor Ganya gave him any response. He pressed on doggedly through their silence.
All right, we face him tomorrow. I shall have to think on our approach. Salim and I alone will attempt to breach the fortress.

What about me?
Iridor asked.

Lazar shook his head.
You have done all that has been asked of you. You cannot do any more
.

But this is my role
.

Not to die
.

Lazar, you must understand—

Not to die!
he reiterated.
You have suffered enough. You have guided us here. Now it is time for you to hide. We will not speak again until this is over and he is dead
.

Lazar knew Iridor understood which ‘he’ was meant. Arafanz was a dangerous distraction but
neither of them had lost sight of the true enemy who walked among them.

You must do nothing rash. Remember, Lazar, he cannot be killed by conventional means. Leave it to Lyana
. They both heard and ignored Ganya gasp at the mention of the Goddess.
This is her battle.

You don’t even know who she is!
Lazar countered.

I must remind you that I don’t wear this guise for entertainment. The fact that Iridor is present is testimony to the fact that she is also within our midst. Let’s forget Ana for the moment, let’s just focus on the Goddess, whom we struggle for. Trust me, whether I know who she is or not, Lyana is incarnated.

Then where is all his blazing power you have warned me about?
Lazar watched the owl’s feathers ruffle, the movement akin to a shrug.

I cannot say
.

If Lyana is alive, walking among us, he should be full with his magical powers. Why doesn’t he use them?

I cannot explain it. But I trust her and you will have to do the same.

Unless, of course, Lyana is somehow hiding her existence well enough to not prompt his powers in full
, Ganya offered. Lazar noticed that her brow was furrowed in deep thought.

He knew Iridor did not appreciate the woman joining in but they were making use of her magics and that was all that was protec ting them right now. It was only fair that she join her thoughts with theirs.
What do you mean?
he asked.

Ganya answered him mildly but looked at the owl as she spoke.
Iridor insists that Lyana is incarnate
.

She is, I tell you
, Iridor said, exasperated.

And I believe you
, she said.
That is how the old stories go. Iridor’s rising heralds the imminent arrival of Lyana but also provokes the search by Maliz. It is how it has always been
.
Perhaps she
is
with us.
Ganya’s voice was dreamy.
But maybe she hasn’t been born yet?