Full Circle (4 page)

They left the restaurant feeling mellow and full. The wine had done its job and all barriers between them had been dissolved. Nick put his arm around Lily as they walked down the street. It was around 10pm and the moonless night was full of stars.

“Where to?” Nick asked as he lit a cigarette. “Will Alice crucify me if I don’t bring you home straight after dinner?”

“I will deal with Alice. What did you have in mind?”

“A couple of chums invited me to meet them at a pub not far from here. Would you like to go? They are a good lot. I think some of their girlfriends are coming too.” He blew out some smoke giving her time to consider.

“I would love to come.”

Lily shyly slipped her hand inside his and they headed towards the pub. It was a few blocks down on a side street right off Piccadilly Circus. The name “The Thorn and the Crown” implied something from Elizabethan times, but the pub was relatively modern and well lit behind the blackout curtains. They made their way through the noisy crowd by the bar towards the back where a table full of flyboys was in the midst of a drinking contest. They were welcomed warmly and a couple of lads squeezed closer together to make room for the newcomers. Lily was surprised to see the buxom singer from last night squeezed in next to a dark youth in an RAF uniform. He had his arm possessively around her and a pint in the other hand. The woman saw her looking and introduced herself.

“I am Shirley. I saw you at Café Madrid last night. You were with that tall blond.” Lily nodded, feeling ashamed for making fun of Shirley the night before.

“That’s my husband, Roger, and I see you came with Nick. Did you meet him last night? He is a good lad. He is Roger’s commanding officer.”

Nick introduced her around and went to get them a drink from the bar. All the young men at the table were part of Nick’s squadron and would be shipping out with him in two weeks. Lily wondered how many of them would come back. Shirley got up to powder her nose and Lily joined her in the ladies room.

“How long have you and Roger been married, Shirley?”

“Only three months. Rog used to come to the club every night to hear me sing and finally got the courage to ask me for a drink. We were married two weeks later. Now is not the time for long engagements. He left for training two weeks after the wedding and just came back down last week. Did you know they are shipping out in less than two weeks, love?” She painted her lips a bright red and patted her peroxide blond curls. Close up she looked older than Lily expected.

“Are you afraid he won’t come back?” Lily knew she shouldn’t have asked, but she couldn’t help thinking about Nick never returning and it just slipped out.

Shirley’s eyes met hers in the mirror above the cracked sink. “Yes, love, I am afraid, but I wouldn’t change a thing if I had to do it over again, so I have to take my chances, don’t I?” They went back out into the noisy room and Lily saw Nick laughing at something one of his friends said. He looked so young and happy and she smiled as their eyes met above the heads of his friends wanting this night to go on forever. By the time she got home it was well after 2am, but she didn’t care. It was Saturday and she could sleep in and have a leisurely breakfast before meeting Nick in the afternoon. Nick had kissed her goodnight and turned to leave, but came running back to kiss her again. Their parting took a lot longer this time, but finally she let herself in, closing the door behind her and tip-toed upstairs in the darkness.

Lily woke up past 10am to find an irritable Alice in the kitchen having her second cup of tea. “I was worried about you.” Lily came up behind Alice and gave her a warm hug. “Don’t be grumpy, Alice. I had such a wonderful evening.” She twirled around the kitchen ending up in front of the cupboard full of tea mugs.

“Had a good time, did you?”

“I did. I really fancy him, Alice.”

“Don’t get too attached, lovey, he is shipping out in two weeks.”

“Let’s not speak of it. He is here now and I want to enjoy my time with him. He is collecting me at noon for a walk in the park. Would you like to join us?” Alice was usually free on weekends since her married lover spent time with his family on his days off. They saw each other only at the hospital where the good doctor had his own office with a very useful cot. He occasionally took her out for a meal or to the pictures, but it was all very hush hush and Alice stopped expecting anything more for the time being. They would go public once he left his wife, but Lily would believe it when she actually saw it. She wished Alice would go out more and find a nice, single bloke who would be proud to show her to the world rather than keep her hidden in the shadows.

Nick showed up promptly at noon, although he looked the worse for wear after the night before. He had a few pints with his mates after the wine at the restaurant and Lily saw him grimace as he looked at the sun pouring through the sitting room window. She handed him two aspirin and a glass of water in exchange for a look of undying gratitude as he popped them in his mouth. Alice excused herself and went out to do some much needed grocery shopping. Lily and Nick left shortly after and took the bus to Hyde Park for a stroll along the Serpentine. It was a gorgeous September afternoon, the warm sun shining on their faces and not a cloud in the sky. For a moment it seemed like everything was as it was before the war and they were just two young people with all the time in the world.

“Tell me about your childhood, Lily.” Nick lit a cigarette and offered her one. Lily declined. She wasn’t much of a smoker.

“There isn’t all that much to tell. I had a very ordinary childhood in Penzance. My father is a GP with his own practice. His surgery is right in our house, but has a separate entrance for the patients. Once my brother Edward and I got older, mum started to help him out with the administrative bits. He also works at the hospital several times a week. My mum used to be a musician with a string quartet before she married and she still plays the cello for enjoyment. She is rather good. Edward is a few years younger than I. He is still at school.”

“It must be nice to have a doctor in the family.”

“Yes, except for those times when we tried to feign illness to get out of going to school. It never worked.” Lily made a face and linked her arm through Nick’s. He looked down at her and she noticed that his green eyes had gold flecks in the sunlight.

“Tell me more,” he urged.

“I met Alice while we were at primary school. Her parents are Russian and you know how much people like foreigners, especially in Cornwall. She was born here, but some would still ignore her and make jokes about her background. Her grandmother was a Duchess, believe it or not. They were very wealthy, but her mother escaped the Revolution with nothing but the clothes on her back and a few valuables, which helped her and Alice’s father get to England and set up here. Alice and I always talked about going to London and sharing a flat while working at exciting, glamorous jobs. Now I type endless reports in a windowless room and Alice changes bandages and takes out soiled chamber pots. See, dreams do come true,” she said. “Now tell me about you.”

“My father was a history professor at a school in Glasgow. He met my mum while vacationing in Brighton and she returned to Scotland with him after the wedding. I guess they were happy enough, or so it seemed to a little boy. We had a big house and my brother and I had a nanny and a nice garden to play in. Life was good. Mum was a happy person. She was always singing and asking us to dance with her. I would refuse her thinking it too embarrassing to waltz around the room with my mother. Now I wish I had danced. My parents used to take drives in the country on Sundays and one Sunday they didn’t come back. Ian and I waited and waited. We kept watch from the window until it became too dark to see, but they never came. It was after we had gone to bed that a constable came and spoke to our nanny. They had been killed in a head-on collision with another car. The nanny telephoned Aunt Gwen in London and two days later she swept in taking us back with her. She brought us up as her own. End of story. Now, how about a boat ride?”

They rented a rowboat and floated lazily down the Serpentine enjoying the cool September breeze. Nick tried to sneak a kiss and Lily playfully splashed him with water. The river sparkled in the late afternoon sunshine and Lily felt like she sparkled too in the light of Nick’s affectionate gaze. Lily turned up her face to the sun and let her hand trail in the cool water. She could hear the quacking of ducks and snippets of conversation and laughter as other boaters glided past them. “Can I talk you into some fish and chips? I am starving.” Lily nodded and Nick began to row towards the shore. He looked considerably better since taking the Aspirin and now all he needed was food. They returned the boat to the elderly assistant and headed in search of supper. They came upon a fish and chip shop soon enough and spent the next half hour giggling as they fought over chips and put pieces of flaky fish into each other’s mouths. Nick ate most of Lily’s fish, but she didn’t care. She was happy enough to give it to him since he was hungry.

“Let’s go to the pictures. I hear “Top Hat” is playing.”

“I didn’t have you down as a fan of Fred Astaire,” Lily chuckled “or is it Ginger Rogers that tempts you?”

“I am not a fan of either, but two hours in the dark with you will more than make up for my lack of interest in Twinkle Toes. Let’s go find a cinema.” They were half way through the movie when the air siren began to wail. “Bloody hell!” Lily muttered as she got up from her seat and headed for the door. The theater had been full, but no one pushed or shoved. People walked out calmly and headed for the nearest tube station. Once again Lily and Nick were pressed against each other in a crowd of frightened people.

“We have to stop meeting this way,” he murmured into her ear lightly nibbling on her earlobe. No one paid them much mind, especially after something was hit nearby. The walls of the station vibrated from the blast and lights began to flicker; pieces of plaster and dust raining on their heads from the ceiling. Nick drew her closer telling her not to be afraid. A few moments later another explosion rocked the station and people screamed as dust and plaster turned to large pieces of concrete. The lights went out completely and they were left in darkness to wonder if anyone had been hurt. A few people pulled out torches and lit them illuminating the crowded platform. A few people had cuts and bruises, but no one suffered major injuries and the sounds of explosions gradually moved further away. They waited another fifteen minutes until the all clear sounded and made their way through the debris out of the damaged, dusty station.

A building they had passed on the way to the shelter had been hit and its inhabitants were standing outside staring at what had been their home. The pavement was littered with the detritus of their lives and an elderly woman cried softly watching flames leaping out of an upper story window. Her husband put an arm around her and they watched the flames consume their home. There was nothing to do but go home and Nick walked Lily back to her house. The streets got quieter as they moved further away from the site of the bombing and they walked hand in hand in companionable silence.

Alice was listening to the wireless and sewing in the sitting room when they got back, but she quickly excused herself and went to her room. Lily was grateful for her tact. She wanted a few minutes alone with Nick before he went home to Kensington. She sat down on the sofa and beckoned for him to join her. She felt her heart pounding in her chest. Despite her flirtatious nature, Lily did not do much more than kiss. She had a boyfriend of sorts back in Penzance and he had put his hand up her blouse while they were kissing in the garden behind his parents’ house. Lily had enjoyed the sensation, but panicked when she felt his hand move up her thigh beneath her skirt. She shoved him so hard that he fell off the bench and walked off in a huff offended. He was stepping out with someone else by the following week leaving Lily feeling remorseful and embarrassed. That was the extent of her sexual experience and her stomach felt tight with anticipation as Nick sat down next to her on the sofa.

Nick gently caressed her face before leaning in for a kiss. His lips were gentle and warm and she felt herself relaxing. She kissed him back full of innocent enthusiasm and felt his instant response. His kisses became more demanding and he pushed her down onto the sofa covering her body with his own. Lily wrapped her arms around him drawing him closer, wanting all of him. All thoughts fled from her head and she let instinct take over as Nick’s tongue slid into her mouth exploring and titillating as his hand moved to her breast. She tensed for a moment, but then took his hand and guided it beneath her jersey. His hand felt warm on her skin as he pulled down her bra and began to caress her, using his thumb to massage her nipple. Lily moaned with unexpected pleasure hoping he wouldn’t stop. Suddenly, Nick’s hand was gone and he sat up running a hand through his spiky hair. Lily looked up at him feeling puzzled and humiliated. Did he not want her? She thought he was enjoying himself.

“Lily, I am sorry. I have to go now. May I see you tomorrow? I am having brunch with my aunt and uncle, but I am free for the rest of the day.” He seemed to be rambling nervously and Lily sat up adjusting her sweater.

“Did I do something wrong?” She knew she shouldn’t ask, but she had to know why he stopped so abruptly. Maybe he was disgusted by her eagerness and thought her cheap. Lily felt herself blushing in the dim light of the lamp and hoped he couldn’t see her mortification. He was just saying that about tomorrow and she would never see him again. She felt tears stinging her eyes as she tried to look away from him. Nick took her by the chin and turned her face toward him.

“Sweetheart, you did nothing wrong, but this is not the way I want it to be between us. I am serious about you and I want everything to be just right. Will you forgive me?” All Lily could do was nod miserably. Nick pulled her to her feet and kissed her tenderly. “See you tomorrow. I’ll let myself out.”