From What I Remember (43 page)

“You working on your speech, Kylie?” Max leans over from the back. His head is nearly flush with mine; his hair grazes mine. I feel a shiver shoot up my spine. I wish he didn’t do that to me. It would be much easier to pretend I don’t give a shit if my body would just play along.

I glance at him and can’t help catching an eyeful of Lily as well. She looks as sour as ever. Max is suddenly pretending to care. Please. Fool me once. Not twice. When Lily arrived he fell right back into old patterns. Last night was just a temporary deviation from form, or as he told Lily, “temporary insanity.” Once an asshole, always an asshole.

I’m not interested in conversation. That ship has sailed. We are no longer whatever we were last night. We’re not even friends. I may not regret the experience, but that doesn’t mean I want his pity.

“Uh, yeah,” I say.

“Want to read it to us? Try it out?”

“No. I don’t.” I turn around and give my computer my full attention, hoping something brilliant will come to mind. Maybe I can add a line here or there, incrementally improve things.

“The whole valedictorian thing is so stupid and overrated,” Lily says to no one in particular.

“I doubt you’d think it was overrated if you were the one chosen, like me,” I say. I’m in no mood for her attitude, and I’m in no mood to let her get away with it, either.

“Whatever. I so don’t care.”

“Lily, you care more than anyone,” Charlie adds. “You just weren’t first. Like Kylie.”

Charlie hasn’t said much this whole car ride, but what he has said hasn’t been anything like what I assumed he’d say. It’s a shock to my system. He’s not such an awful guy. I’m actually starting to like him. Guess I shouldn’t have kicked him in the shin.

“I wanted to come in first, but I never wanted the responsibility of the speech. It’s too much pressure. You spend all this time working on it, and then no one really listens, and the few people who do rip it to shreds. You just can’t win,” Lily says. “I feel bad for you, Kylie. I really do. I know how much work you’ve probably put into it. And I know how hard it’s going to be to pull it off.”

Lily isn’t fooling me. She’s trying to psych me out. Not going to work.

“Kylie’s speech is going to blow people away. I’ve heard it and it rocks. So shut your piehole, Lily,” Will snaps.

“I heard some of it too, and I’m sure Kylie’s going to be great,” Max says.

What a lie. He hated what he heard. Don’t bother defending me. I can fight my own battles, dude.

“You know what, Lily, I don’t really care what you or anyone else thinks. It’s one speech. One day. It’s like a sneeze in our lives.” I refuse to let Lily think she’s won. Sure, she’s gotten to Max. But she hasn’t gotten to me.

“It can be pretty embarrassing if it doesn’t go well. Three years ago, Janelle Davis gave such a bad speech, I heard that she’s still too embarrassed to come visit.”

“Lily!” Max scolds.

“What? I’m just saying…”

“Kylie, I meant to ask you guys earlier, but then it completely slipped my mind, with Guido the killer pimp after us. Why are you and Max wearing wedding rings? Must have gotten pretty serious last night,” Will says.

Oh, no. I know what Will’s doing. Trying to bitch slap Lily. But this isn’t the way.

“What?” Lily says, turning to Max. “You have a wedding ring?”

“Uh, not exactly,” Max says, sheepish.

I can’t help myself: I turn around and look at Max’s hand and discover he isn’t wearing his anymore. I slip mine off and put it in my pocket.

“Pretty sure I saw one on each of you this morning,” Will says. “Wait, wasn’t there a massive group wedding on the pier last night? You guys didn’t actually tie the knot in a crazy fit of spontaneity, did you? Because, I mean, you were both pretty wasted.”

I get a sick feeling in my stomach. I don’t want to do this.

Not here. Not now. The space is too claustrophobic. I turn around and shoot Will a look, but he ignores me.

“I mean, it wouldn’t surprise me. You looked pretty in love—”

“No! Nothing like that happened,” I say, cutting Will off, even though I’m not sure what exactly happened. My recollection is a little vague. I want to ask Max in privacy and then deal with the consequences later. Not in the car, with everyone listening.

“Actually, we did. We got married. On the pier. With about thirty other couples,” Max says. Jesus, what is he doing?

“What?!” Lily and I say it at the exact same time.

“Jinx,” Will says.

“Are you kidding me?” Lily spews her venom on Max. “You said nothing happened. It was all a mistake, temporary insanity. This is not nothing.”

“Which is a double negative, meaning something happened,” Will adds.

I need to stop this.

“Trust me, it was nothing,” I say. “We’re not really married. It was like a game on the pier. We both know it wasn’t real, right, Max?”

“I guess so,” Max says, without conviction.
C’mon, help me out here.

“It was nothing,” I say again, wanting to emphasize my point.

“From what I saw last night, it sure didn’t look like nothing,” Will adds, not helping the situation at all.

“Well, it was,” I tell Will, shooting him yet another look, hoping he’ll actually get the point this time and shut the hell up.

“You can’t just get married without a license or anything,” I say. “Right?” I’m actually asking because I’m not quite sure, and I could use a bit of reassurance.

“Right,” Max says. “You need a license.”

“I cannot believe this. Just when I think it can’t get any worse. What the fuck were you thinking?” Lily comes at him like a bull out of a pen.

“Lily, calm down,” I say. “You heard Max. We’re not really married. You need a license. It was a goof. No big deal. A joke.” I don’t know why I’m trying to appease her. I guess because I don’t want this thing blowing up any more than it already has. What good can it do? I want to get to school without further damage.

“Max, why are you doing this to me?” Lily’s voice has risen ten octaves. It’s hurting my ears.

“Lily, we talked about this. Nothing happened. Chill.”

“Don’t tell me to chill,” Lily spits out. “I think I deserve some details about last night.” Her anger is in full bloom.

I know I’ve been pushing Max away, not interested in ever speaking to him again, but something about the way he says “nothing” infuriates me. And the truth is, I still don’t know what happened last night, after we got back to Manuel’s. I’ve been giving him the benefit of the doubt, hoping he was a gentleman. But now I want details too. I spin around in my seat and look at Max.

“You know what, Max,” I say. “I would actually like to know what happened, too. What does that mean, ‘nothing’?”

I should not be going down this road, but I’m exhausted, hurt, hungry, and angry. Not a great combination. So much for minimal damage.

“Let’s get it all out in the open,” I say.

“I’m all for that,” Lily chimes in.

Max looks panicked, furious. He’s being pressed on all sides.

“Maybe you guys should talk about this later? When we’re all not around and things have calmed down,” Charlie says.

“You know what? Charlie makes a good point,” Juan says.
Too late, Juan. We’re in it. Bummer you had to be here.

“Fine.” Max looks from me to Lily. “Kylie, you want to know what happened last night? Lily, you want to know?”

“Yes,” we both say in unison.

“Nothing.” Max spits this out. “Okay? Nothing. What that means is that Kylie and I did not have sex. We slept together. As in fell asleep. That’s all. We were too drunk to do anything else.” As he says this particular piece, he looks me directly in the eye. “And we got married, but as Kylie pointed out, it doesn’t mean a thing. It wasn’t real. Nothing about the night was real. It was a stupid, drunken game. We barely know each other.”

Max’s voice has an edge to it, like he’s angry at me. Which is absurd. If anyone should be angry, it should be me.

“Excellent,” I say. “Thanks for clarifying that.” I turn around and stare at the road.

“You know what I don’t get?” Lily is not giving up the fight. “If you’re gonna sleep around behind my back, why would you do it with Kylie Flores? She’s not even hot. She’s just weird. And skanky.”

Before I have a chance to bite back, Will goes ballistic.

“Listen, you vile little rodent. Kylie has more intelligence, class, and God-given beauty in her pinkie finger than you’ll ever dream of having.”

“As if I care what you think,” Lily tells Will.

“Don’t go after Kylie, Lily. This is not about her,” Max threatens.

“What’s it about, then?” Lily demands.

“Us. You. Me.”

“I don’t get it.” Lily has now started crying. “Why are you defending her? If nothing happened, then why aren’t you taking my side?”

“There are no sides in this, Lily. Stop turning it into a war.” Max is talking to Lily but looking at me now.

I can’t stay silent any longer. “Lily, you have nothing to worry about. Okay? Max is all yours. News flash: I don’t want him.”

can’t stand Kylie. That’s not true. But I wish it were. It would make things a shitload easier.

How could I have thought she was anything other than completely psycho? How can she just stare at me like nothing at all happened last night? Sure, Lily’s arrival has thrown a wrench into things, but Kylie doesn’t even seem to understand what a tough spot I’m in.

Whatever we had is done. Finished. It obviously didn’t mean a thing to her.

Lily is crying harder now. I feel bad she had to walk into the middle of my nightmare. If only she’d stayed back in La Jolla like I wanted her to. Charlie and I could have gotten through this by ourselves. But with Lily and Will along, things are spiraling out of control. I’m not sure how to make things better, but I know I need to try. It’s the best course of action at this point.

I put an arm around Lily. “C’mon, Lil, it’s not that bad. It’s one sucky car ride, but there’s graduation, parties, and the whole summer to get psyched about.”

This seems to make Lily cry even harder.

Funny how Will and Kylie aren’t saying anything now. Like they’re waiting for me to take care of this. If only I’d never agreed to do Murphy’s stupid assignment, none of us would be here.

“Lil, I’m sorry about all this. Try to calm down. It’s seriously going to be okay,” I say, knowing it’s pretty pathetic comfort at the moment. I wish I could go back to loving Lily and barely knowing Kylie existed. But it’s too late for that.

“No. It’s not going to be okay! Nothing is going to be okay ever again,” Lily shouts. “My life is over. Completely fucked!”

Whoa! This seems like an overreaction even for Lily. What’s going on? She looks so desperate, like something inside her has broken. That can’t be all about me, can it?

“This is going to be something we all laugh about in a few weeks,” I say, not entirely convinced that’s true. “You’re just being melodramatic—”

“I am not being melodramatic. I am being honest. For once. Things are bad. Worse even than they seem right now. My entire life is shit.”

“Lily, what are you talking about? Everything’s going to be fine. You’ll see, after graduation—”

“My dad is going to jail.” Lily says this between sobs.