From This Moment On (58 page)

It’s usually arrogance, ignorance, or jealousy that suggests the rich and famous have no right to be unhappy or to feel or express their unhappiness. This thinking can only come from those who give too much value to money and fame. These are the people who believe that money and fame are the most important things in life, that once you have them, there is nothing more to need or want. When you believe that someone rich and famous has no rights to public sympathy, it’s because you believe the only things that bring happiness are material and superficial. Those who believe that love, sincerity, honesty, and integrity are the more valuable elements in life also realize that fame and fortune can, in many ways, actually add grief and stress to one’s life rather than make it easier.

When you come from an underprivileged life, ready to meet the rest of it with a heart full of dreams and ambitions, you had better also be ready to face a world that, at times, will take pleasure in kicking the shit out of you. A world that will try to steal your precious gifts away. Expect life to be cruel and to make it as hard as possible for you to reach your goals, seemingly on purpose. There is little room for big success in life, as it’s often granted to an elite group squeezed
into a small space. However, I don’t believe success belongs only to society’s elite of the best educated, most privileged, or lucky. Success
does,
however, belong to anyone willing to earn it, and who has the talent and ability to be there. All capable people have the right to access the opportunity of success.

Regardless of what status you were born into in this world, human nature has equipped you with the skills to survive. I’ve learned during my own climbs through life so far that it’s better to be realistic and prepare for a few falls if you’re going to tackle a steep mountain, as mountains get narrower at the top, and there you see everyone fighting for space, footing, and oxygen. The air gets thinner as you get higher, and so does the difference between fair and unfair, and your ability to see clearly while your head is in the clouds. The trick is to hold your head above the clouds to keep a cool mind and clear vision so you don’t lose sight of your goals.

My personal feeling is that if you are able to survive the climb of life on whatever mountain it is you’ve set out to master, and if in the bit between the base and the peak you learn something from both the good and the bad alike, and if you live to tell about it with gratitude, you’ve succeeded.

The months of long hours writing these pages took particular patience and understanding from my son, Eja, as the book became somewhat of a permanent guest in our life over the course of a year. He was always gracious and accepting about the moments the book preoccupied my time and attention, and I hope he takes fond memories with him of us writing side by side during many evenings after school: Eja working on his creative writing homework or personal poems and songs while I worked on the pages of this book. One day he will read these pages, and my wish as he makes his way through
the chapters of my life is that he comes to appreciate the importance of documenting what’s in your heart and recognizes the value in sharing such intimacy with purpose and honesty. To respect and honor the truth, the process of discovering it, and the gift of learning from what it has to teach us along the way—to cherish the written word as a precious expression that is neither spontaneous nor fickle; and unlike the spoken word, writing allows more time for reflection and revision. This places a greater demand on the writer to take responsibility for its meaning and what it represents. Regardless of whether this memoir is praised or criticized, my wish is that my son finds peace in having the opportunity to learn about my life, from the words of his mother.

I started with a story; I ended with a book. This was a team effort and I would like to thank the dedicated group of individuals who contributed to its creation. To my manager, Jason Owen, for thinking outside the box, and Stacy Smith for her wisdom and nurturing. A sincere thanks to the publisher of Atria Books, Judith Curr, who, before even reading a word, believed. Thanks to Atria’s director of publicity, Paul Olsewski, and a big thank-you to Bob Barnett for taking me seriously when I said I’d written a book. It’s likely he may have thought,
You mean, a song?
But no, I meant a book, and he got it! Thank you, Philip Bashe and Patty Romanowski Bashe, who contributed their time and talent throughout the shaping and editing process. A special thank-you to Jeanne Lee, Sarah Cantin, Jessica Chin, and Chris Lloreda at Atria. I can’t thank Sarah Durand enough for being my gentle guide and lifeline through the cover-to-cover experience. I thank you for your patience, sensitivity, and respect for authenticity. Authoring a book is new territory for me, and without the foundation of support from those who contributed, my life story would have remained printed on hundreds of loose pages, stacked at the bottom of a drawer, under jeans that no longer fit but which I can’t bring myself to throw away.

A portion of my proceeds from this book will be donated to Shania Kids Can, a foundation dedicated to helping underprivileged children.
Thank you to everyone who makes this charity possible and thanks especially to the children whose lives this foundation reaches.

“Mommy, you’re so sweet, your face is like a candy.”

Mommy replies, “Well, son, your face is as beautiful as a flower.”

The five-year-old boy then says without skipping a beat, “And Mommy, you picked me.”

I cannot take credit for choosing my incredible son, as Heaven picked him for me. Thank you, Heaven!

A

Addams Family, The,
27

American Idol,
211
–12

B

Beaches,
205

Berlin,
340

Billboard,
237
,
240
,
269
,
271
,
273
,
337
,
338

Blonde on Blonde,
273

Bonanza,
27

Born to Run,
288

Brady Bunch, The,
27

C

Cats,
203

Cinderella,
82
–83