Friends Wanting Benefits (17 page)

"About what?" The captain looked at her like she was completely nuts.

"About letting us use your brig for a little role play fun."

"Miss Wilde." He sighed. "No, you may not use my brig for your fun."

The joy drained from her face. "Okay, just thought I'd ask."

"Oh and Miss Wilde?"

"Yes," she replied half-heartedly.

"Please confine your sexual activity to your cabin."

"Can I ask one more question?"

"Sure, why not." Waterbrook replied, nearly at the end of his rope.

"Would you consider something like, um... a handjob in the hot-tub as a public sexual act—"

"Victoria!" Jillian interrupted her and closed her eyes, sighing.

The captain opened his mouth to speak, but had nothing.

Jillian grabbed her friend by the arm, pulled her out of the chair and toward the door.

After Jillian pushed her out to the hall, she poked her head back in the office and gave the captain a sheepish smile. "I promise I'll keep her out of trouble."

Waterbrook sighed and rolled his eyes.

In the hallway, Jillian gave Victoria a look.

Victoria frowned. "What's your problem?"

"Seriously!" Jillian shook her head.

Victoria's frown turned into a curious smile. "Oh, shoot."

"What now?" Jillian asked hesitantly.

"I should have asked him how far apart the bars are."

"Why, he already said you couldn't use it."

"I know, but I was just curious. You know in case I fantasize about it."

"Oh, okay..." Running her hands over her face, Jillian sighed and asked in a slow, tired voice, "I know I'll regret it, but why you need to know how far apart the bars are?"

"Duh... If they're too close together, Ethan won't be able to fit his, you know, through them."

"Okay..."

"He's really big, you know." Victoria widened her eyes.

"No, I get it." Jillian let out an exhausted sigh.

After a moment of silence, Victoria asked, "So, why'd you drag me out of there anyway?"

"Uh..." Jillian made a face. "Why'd you think?"

"Honestly, I don't know. I'm pretty sure he was on the fence there at the end."

"What?" She shook her head, dumbfounded.

"I think he was going to say yes to the hot tub handjob thing!"

"I'm pretty sure I know on the fence when I see it." Jillian frowned. "And he was completely on the other side of the fence. Completely!"

"Well..." Victoria shook her head mockingly. "We'll never know now will we?"

Jillian scoffed then motioned to the door with her hand. "Okay, go ahead. Go back in there and ask him then."

"Really?"

"Yeah..." Jillian held her fingers about an inch apart. "We were this close to being charged as international terrorists, but I really think you should find out if the captain frowns on hot tub handjobs."

"Okay." Victoria held her head high. "When you say it like that it almost seems silly to ask. Maybe even a little dangerous."

"You think?" Jillian shot her a frustrated look before she took off down the hall with her friend following after her.

After they walked a little, Victoria said, "You know, I was just kidding about all that stuff."

"You were?"

"Well, most of that stuff. Yeah, I mean, I'm not completely crazy, I understand that having sex in the hot tub is probably a bad idea."

"Thank God, because I really couldn't tell if you were—"

"I have some common sense, I just like to have fun with people— especially stuffy ones— and I really think the captain needs to lighten up a lot."

"Yeah, probably."

"I mean, would all hell break loose if he let me use the brig for my little sex fantasy?"

"No." Jillian shrugged. "I guess not."

"It's always been a fantasy of mine and it's not like an opportunity comes along every day when you have access to one."

"That's true."

"And, you know, a rogue wave could wipe this entire ship out at any minute."

"What?" Suddenly alarmed, Jillian's eyes got big.

"Yeah, I mean it's not likely, but it could happen."

"Don't say crap like that. I'm nervous about boats as it is."

"You see, that's my point. You never know when you might take you last breath and while you're alive you might as well make every moment count."

Jillian pondered that a few seconds then shrugged. "I guess."

"I say, as long as no one gets hurt why not have a little fun." Victoria smiled then headed down the hall.

Jillian tapped her on the shoulder. "So, um, how big is he?"

Stopping, Victoria turned back to her. "Who?"

"Ethan, you know..." Jillian motioned with her eyes downward.

"Oh." Victoria shook her head. "Wow."

"What?"

"You really need to get laid, don't you?" Victoria scoffed.

"Yeah," Jillian muttered with a frown.

"Come on. We have to do this. I promised them," Jillian whined as she stood near the cabin door, looking back to George.

"All right. All right." George sighed. "But I'm going to the casino as soon as we're done and I don't want to hear any crap about it."

"Sure. Whatever." Opening the door, she stepped out into the hall.

"I'm serious. No complaints." He pointed a finger at her.

"I won't say a word." She put on a smile. "Come on. This will be fun."

"Yeah," he grumbled as he led the way down the narrow corridor. When they reached the atrium, she moved next to him and they walked arm in arm toward the large auditorium.

About fifteen minutes later, Ricky the cruise director was bright-eyed and bubbly on stage as he broke the ice with the more than fifteen hundred passengers in attendance. "Tonight we have a special treat for you. How many of you attended Tuesday night's Love and Marriage game?"

Placing one finger to his chin, he scanned the crowd looking at the overwhelming show of hands. He pointed to a couple in the front row and cringed. "Harold, is that you?"

A middle aged man called back. "Yes, it's me."

"You're still here?" Ricky replied before shooting an evil grin to the crowd. "I would have thought Nancy tossed you overboard after your performance the other night."

The audience roared with laughter and when they finally quieted down, Ricky shook his head and put on a mock scowl. "I've been hosting this game for almost four years and I've never, ever seen anyone get more questions wrong that you did, Harold."

Harold looked around embarrassed as the audience giggled once more.

Ricky swatted his hand in the air and smiled. "I'm kidding. Let's hear it for Harold and Nancy. They were great sports."

The crowd erupted in applause.

"As I was saying, tonight we have something special for you— a celebrity edition of our famous Love and Marriage game featuring our three best-selling authors." Ricky cleared his throat, put his hand to his mouth as if he were sharing a secret and said, "If anyone knows how to answer questions about love and sex, you'd think a group of romance authors should be able to do it."

The audience led out another chuckle as the curtain opened to reveal three pairs of comfortable chairs placed on the stage with each set facing away from the other at an angle. A man and woman occupied each chair holding a small dry erase board and marker.

Ricky walked behind the group and smiled. "Here are our victims... Uh, I mean our contestants."

The couples laughed along with the audience. Then the cruise director proceeded to introduce each couple and ask them how long they were married. Jillian and George clocked in at nineteen years while Theresa and Jeff were at fifteen, and Gloria and Robert were the newlyweds at only eight. George was the only contestant with a beer next to his chair. He took a sip and returned it back to the floor.

Afterward Ricky said, "Before we get started, I need to tell you that our game is for mature audiences only. So, anyone easily offended or those too young for this sort of thing, should probably look for another activity."

Ricky scanned the crowd and saw no one getting out of their seats. "Well, I guess no one wants to miss this. Can't say I blame them." He flashed the crowd a snarky look. "I have to warn you three gentlemen that if you don't perform well, you might get the silent treatment the rest of the cruise just like poor Harold there."

The crowd giggled once more then Ricky pointed to the old man. "Sorry Harold... Okay, now each of our contestants is holding a dry erase board. The game is very simple. I'm going to ask our couples a number of slightly embarrassing questions, they will each write down their answers and then we'll reveal them. Each matching answer will be worth ten points. Is everyone ready?"

The six contestants replied affirmatively.

"First question... Couples, what color panties is your wife wearing right now?" Ricky winked at the crowd. "We will also accept
none
as an answer."

The women went to work quickly writing on their boards as did Theresa's husband. After a few seconds, Gloria's husband wrote on his board leaving only George looking mystified.

"Ten seconds." Ricky paced around the stage looking over the contestants' shoulders and making silly faces.

George scribbled something down as the cruise director moved behind Theresa and Jeff. "Jeff, what color panties is Theresa wearing right now?"

"Black." Jeff held up his board for Ricky to see.

"Is it a thong or a bikini or—"

"Hey that wasn't part of the question?" Jeff grinned.

"I know, I know, but I was just curious myself." Ricky shrugged and the audience let out a chuckle. "Theresa show us your answer."

Theresa held up her board and it read, 'black.' The audience burst into applause.

"That's ten points for Theresa and Jeff," Ricky said as he made his way to the next couple. "Okay, now Robert, what color underwear is your beautiful wife wearing right now?"

Robert shrugged as he held up his board and said sheepishly, "Blue?"

Gloria beamed and held up her matching board.

"Great, and now George." Ricky sneered at the crowd then made his way to stand directly behind Jillian's husband. "I saw you struggled a bit with this question." He cringed. "I sure hope you're able to come up with the right answer so you can keep up with the other couples and not end up sleeping on the sofa tonight."

The audience giggled as George cleared his throat and stammered, "Uh, well, I don't always pick up on these sort of things."

Jillian shrugged and put on a hesitant smile.

"What was your answer?"

Holding up his board, George replied, "I put down red."

Jillian sighed then held up her board, which read 'yellow.'

"Huh..." Ricky shook his head, shooting George a disappointed look. "Your wife is wearing yellow."

"Oh."

Looking up to the crowd, Ricky joked, "You two, um, are sharing the same cabin aren't you?"

After the laughter died down, George said, "I might have been in the casino when she was getting dressed."

"You weren't," Jillian snapped.

Bright eyed, Ricky strolled next to Jillian's chair and asked, "So he was in the room huh?"

"He was." She admitted. "I was still in my underwear before he left for the casino."

"Oh, interesting." Making a goofy face, Ricky made his way back around to George's chair. "She said you were still in the room."

"Um, maybe I was watching the game on TV." He shrugged.

"Yeah..." She rolled her eyes putting on a show for the crowd. "He was watching the game."

Ricky headed away sucking air through his teeth and shaking his head. "I'm sure you can redeem yourself George. Okay, next question… Couples, where did you go on your first date?"

All six got to work immediately writing on their boards.

"Let's start with Robert this time."

Robert held up his board, which read, 'Dinner and a movie.'

Gloria smiled as she held up her board with the matching answer.

"Okay, George."

Wearing a confident smile, George revealed his board as he said. "Ice cream place. We went to this little ice cream place."

Jillian's jaw dropped.

"Uh-oh." Ricky cringed. "I'm going to guess that your wife doesn't agree. Jillian?"

Frowning, she held up her board which read, 'School dance.'

Ricky made a face as he tiptoed over to George, got down on one knee and whispered into the microphone, "Now she put down school dance, which one of you is right?"