Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe (44 page)

The movie speeds up, and sights and sounds start coming faster.
Three-hundred-pound women, shaking and screaming
in church … and in bed … “OH JESUS, I’M COMING!” … Mr. Artis O. Peavey and a number of women exchange nuptial vows … sitting in the Agate Cafe, talking to his friend Baby Shephard … “That woman done busted my head” … “I heard tell it was the husband” … “I would have fought for you, Odetta, but when a man’s got the difference in his hand, loaded and cocked, there ain’t no use in being a fool” … “Give me a pig’s foot and a bottle of beer” … “I’ve got the world in a jug and the stopper in my hand” … “You’re not the only oyster in the stew!”…. Blue Shadows and White Gardenias … amber-colored plastic cigar-holders … Professor Fess Whatley’s Jazz Demons.… Got the miseries? Feena-Mint.… Princess Pee Wee Sam and Scram … Fairyland Park Ballroom … Hartley Toots Killed in Bus.… I married her without my consent, so to speak … “That woman domineered over me”.… Nobody knows you when you’re down and out … Watch out … Don’t be coming down here … Oh no, you gonna get them white folks all mad … all riled up.… No, no, I ain’t one of ’em, boss, they’s just troublemakers … Yes suh … “Get off that bus!
”

Artis tapped his foot on the floor three times and, magically, the movie changed. He is a little boy now, and his momma is cooking in the back of the cafe … 
Oh, don’t get in Momma’s way, she slap you out the door …
There’s Naughty Bird and Willie Boy … and sweet Jasper … Grandma Sipsey’s there, dipping her cornbread in honey … Miss Idgie and Miss Ruth
 … they treat you white
 … And Stump … and Smokey Lonesome …

Then, the old man, who had been agitated just a moment before, begins to smile and relax. He is out in the back of the cafe, helping his daddy barbecue … and he is happy … we know a secret.

His daddy gives him a barbecue and a Grapico, and he runs way back up in the woods to eat it, where it’s cool and green and the pine needles are soft …

The pockmarked man in the hotel lobby walked over and shook the smiling Artis O. Peavey, who was now quiet and still. “What’s the matter with you?”

The man jumped back. “Jesus Christ! This nigger is dead!” He turned to his friend at the counter. “Not only that, but he’s done peed all over the floor!”

 … But Artis was still way up in the woods, with his barbecue.

Evelyn had been at the lodge almost two months now, and had already lost twenty-three pounds. But she had gained in another area. She had found her group, the group she had been looking for all of her life. Here they were, the candy snatchers: chubby housewives, divorcees, single teachers and librarians, each hoping for a new start in life as a slimmer, healthier person.

She had not known how much fun it would be. To Evelyn Couch and her cronies in poundage, the most important thing on their minds was what exciting low-cal dessert would the cooks come up with tonight? Would it be Chiffon Pumpkin Pie, 55 calories per serving? Or Nonfat Fruit Whip, only 50 calories? Or, maybe tonight they would have her favorite, Fitness Flan, 80 calories per serving.

It had never dawned on Evelyn that just knowing it was Boots and Mitties Day could make her heart sing, nor that she would be the one who was always early for Water Fun.

But something else had happened here that she could never have dreamed of. She had become a much sought-after, popular person! When new people arrived at the lodge, they were
soon asked, “Have you met that darling woman from Alabama? Wait till you hear her talk, she has the most adorable accent, and is she a character!”

Evelyn had never thought of herself as being funny or having a cute accent, but it seemed that every time she said anything, the other women would scream with laughter. Evelyn enjoyed her newfound celebrity and played it for all it was worth, holding court at night by the fireplace. Her special friends were three housewives from Thousand Oaks, one named Dorothy and two named Stella. They formed their own, private fat club, and vowed to meet once a year for the rest of their lives; and Evelyn knew they would.

After stretch and flex class, she changed into her new royal-blue jogging outfit and stopped by the desk to get her mail. Ed dutifully forwarded all the junk mail, and usually there was nothing important; but today she saw a letter postmarked Whistle Stop, Alabama. She opened the letter and wondered who could be writing her from there?

Suddenly, Evelyn didn’t feel cute anymore, and she wanted to go home.

Evelyn waited until the first warm day of spring before she called Mrs. Hartman. Somehow she could not stand the thought of seeing Whistle Stop for the first time in the dead of winter. Evelyn rang the doorbell and a pleasant-looking brown-haired woman came to the door.

“Oh Mrs. Couch, come on in. I’m so happy to meet you. Mrs. Threadgoode told me so much about you, I feel as if I know you already.”

She took Evelyn back into a spotless kitchen, where she had set two places with coffee cups and placed a freshly baked pound cake on her green Formica dinette set.

“I was so sorry to have to write you that letter, but I knew that you would want to know.”

“I appreciate that you did. I had no idea she had left Rose Terrace.”

“I know you didn’t. Her friend Mrs. Otis died about a week after you left.”

“Oh no. I didn’t know … I wonder why she didn’t tell me.”

“Well, I told her she ought to, but she said you were on your
vacation and she didn’t want you to worry. That’s how she was, always looking out for the other fellow …

“We moved next door right after her husband died, so I guess I’ve been knowing her for over thirty years, and I never heard her complain, not once, and she didn’t have an easy life. Her son, Albert, was like a child. But every day, she’d get up, and shave and bathe and powder him, and put on his hernia belt—treated him just like he was a baby, even after he was a grown man.… There was never a child more loved than Albert Threadgoode. Bless her heart, I miss her so much, and I know you do, too.”

“Yes, I do, and I just feel terrible I wasn’t there. Maybe I could have done something, gotten her to a doctor or something.”

“No honey. There wasn’t a thing you could have done. She wasn’t sick. We always carried her with us to church on Sunday, and usually she would be all dressed and waiting, sitting on her front porch. But that Sunday morning, when we got ready to leave, she wasn’t there, which was very unusual. So Ray, my husband, walked over and knocked on her door, but she didn’t answer, so he went on in, and in a few minutes he came back out by himself. I said, ‘Ray, where’s Mrs. Threadgoode?’ And he said, ‘Honey, Mrs. Threadgoode’s dead,’ and then he sat down on the steps and cried. She died in her sleep, just as peaceful. I really think she knew her time was near, because whenever I went over there, she would say, ‘Now, Jonnie, if anything ever happens to me, I want Evelyn to have these things.’ She thought the world of you. She’d brag on you all the time and said that she was sure you’d come riding up here one day and take her for a ride in your new Cadillac. Poor old thing, when she died, she didn’t have hardly anything to her name but a few knickknacks. That reminds me, let me get your things.”

Mrs. Hartman came back with a picture of a naked girl swinging on a swing, with blue bubbles in the background; a shoe box; and a Mason jar with what looked like gravel in it.

Evelyn took the jar. “What in the world?”

Mrs. Hartman laughed. “That’s her gallstones. Why she thought you’d want them, the Lord only knows.”

Evelyn opened the shoe box. Inside, she found Albert’s birth certificate, Cleo’s graduation diploma from the Palmer School of Chiropractic, in Davenport, Iowa, in 1927, and about fifteen funeral programs. Then she found an envelope full of photographs. The first was a picture of a man and a little boy in a sailor suit, sitting on a half-moon. Next was a 1939 school picture of a little blond boy; on the back it said,
Stump Threadgoode
—
10 years old
. Then she picked up a family portrait of the Threadgoode family, taken in 1919; Evelyn felt as if they were old friends. She recognized Buddy immediately, with those flashing eyes and big smile. There was Essie Rue and the twins, and Leona, posing like a queen … and little Idgie, with her toy rooster. And there, way in the back, in a long white apron, was Sispey, taking picture posing very seriously.

Right underneath, she found a picture of a young woman in a white dress, standing in the same yard, shading her eyes from the sun and smiling at the person taking the picture. Evelyn thought that she was probably one of the loveliest-looking creatures she had ever seen, with those long eyelashes and that sweet smile. But she didn’t recognize her. She asked Mrs. Hartman if she knew who it was.

Mrs. Hartman put on the glasses she had hanging on a chain around her neck and studied that picture for a while, puzzled. “Oh, I’ll tell you who that is! That’s that friend of hers who lived here for a time. She was from Georgia … Ruth somebody.”

My God, thought Evelyn; Ruth Jamison. It must have been taken that first summer she had come to Whistle Stop. She looked at it again. It had never occurred to her that Ruth had been so beautiful.

The next picture was of a gray-haired woman wearing a hunting cap and sitting on Santa Claus’s knee, with
Season’s Greetings, 1956
written on the backdrop.

Mrs. Hartman took it and laughed. “Oh, that’s that fool Idgie Threadgoode. She used to run the cafe out here.”

“Did you know her?”

“Who didn’t! Oh, she was a
mess
, there was no telling what that one would do next.”

“Look, Mrs. Hartman, here’s a picture of Mrs. Threadgoode.” The photograph had been taken downtown at Love-man’s department store, about twenty years before; Mrs. Threadgoode was already gray and looked very much like she did the last time Evelyn had seen her.

Mrs. Hartman took the picture in hand. “Bless her heart, I remember that dress. It was dark navy blue with white polka dots. She must have worn that dress for thirty years. After she died, she said she wanted all her clothes to go to the Goodwill. She really didn’t have anything worth saving, poor soul, just an old coat and a few housedresses. They picked up what little furniture there was, all except for the glider on the front porch. I just couldn’t bear to give them that. She used to sit in that thing all day and night, waiting for the trains to go by. It just wouldn’t seem right to let strangers have it. She left her house to our daughter, Terry.”

Evelyn was still taking things out of the box. “Look, Mrs. Hartman, here’s an old menu from the Whistle Stop Cafe. It must be from the thirties. Can you believe those prices? A barbecue for ten cents … and you could get a complete dinner for thirty-five cents! And pie was a nickel!”

“Isn’t that something. It costs at least five or six dollars to get a decent meal nowadays, even out at the cafeteria, and they charge you extra for your beverage and your pie, at that.”

Before she was through, Evelyn found a photograph of Idgie wearing a pair of those glasses with the fake nose, standing with four goofy-looking guys dressed up in crazy outfits, with
Dill Pickle Club … Icebox Follies, 1942
written underneath … and an Easter card from Cleo, the postcards Evelyn had sent her from California, a Southern Railroad pullman car menu from the fifties, a half-used lipstick, a mimeographed copy of Psalm 90, and a hospital armband that said:

And down at the very bottom of the box, Evelyn found the envelope addressed to
Mrs. Evelyn Couch
.