Fractured (BBW Erotic Romance) (5 page)

“
You’re too drunk to drive.
I’m going back inside to find my roommate.” He grabbed my arm and
yanked me to him.

“
Just get in the fucking
car,” he said in my ear. His breath was hot and sinister. I
resisted, trying to pull away from him but his grip became tighter
on my arm. His hand grinded against my bare skin. I pulled away
again but his fist squeezed harder. He was nearly dragging me.
There were several people lingering around where his car was, but
no one seemed to bat an eyelash at us. They kept on sipping out of
their plastic cups.

I yelled out for help. My voice filled the
night’s air with terror. I heard someone scream my name out. It was
a familiar voice. “Let me go,” I yelled.

“
Selena!’ Heath shouted as
he ran towards us. He shoved the man, nearly knocking him over.
“What are you fucking deaf? She said let her go.”

“
What’s your problem bro?
C-can’t you see she’s with me? L-leave us alone.” The guy stood up
and regained his balance, but still stumbled only to charge towards
Heath like a raging bull. His face met with Heath’s fist and his
body fell to the dusty cement like a house of cards. He was out
cold.

“
Are you okay?”

I nodded yes. My teeth were chattering and
breaths were heavy in my chest.

“
C’mon lets go,” Heath said.
His eyes filled with fury. It was frightening and attractive all at
once. He put his arms around my body and helped me walk to his car.
I fell asleep once I heard the door close shut. I felt safe with
him.

***

I woke up wearing nothing except for a
tattered, royal blue football jersey. The color of the numbers on
the front had faded from red to pink. I smelled like skunky beer
and cigarette smoke. I looked in the mirror on the nightstand - my
mascara streaked down my cheeks. My shorts and top were scattered
across the floor. I couldn’t remember a thing from last night.

Where were my clothes? Where was I? Selena,
please don’t tell me you went home with that creeper.

I sat up and my temples began to pound. This
was going to be a hangover from hell. I looked around the room and
saw pair of white of white boxing gloves hung up on the wall. Light
pink blotches covered the front of them. A green belt with was
spread out on the wall above the bed with “Under 21 Middleweight
Champion Andrew Garrison” inscribed on it.

I went home with that creep?

I frantically rocked back and forth on the
bed trying my best to not have a panic attack. Where was he? Did we
have sex last night? My hair was an absolute mess and I hadn’t
showered. I haven’t had any coffee. I couldn’t let him see me like
this. I needed to leave – now.

I threw on my clothes and burst open the
bedroom door only to find Heath, with shirt off, putting utensils
on the dining room table. There were two plates of eggs, sausage
and toast with orange juice on the side. He even had a pot of
coffee brewing.
Oh shit? I was at Heath’s place?!?

“
You’re just in time.
Breakfast is ready,” he said. I stopped dead in my tracks, in awe
of the spread this man put together for us. No man other than my
father made me breakfast. “Just a little something to soak up last
night’s alcohol.”

“
I-I…uh…I have to
go.”

“
Selena…wait…”

“
I’m sorry.”

“
Selena please.”

I stepped out of his door and darted down the
stairs. And ran over to the parking spaces only to realize I didn’t
drive. It would be a long morning walk back to my dorm room, but I
couldn’t bear to have Heath see me like this.

I finally reached my room, drenched in sweat,
panting and sucking air like I finished a marathon. I was mad at
the world. Mad at Candace for leaving me stranded. Mad at that
dumb, drunk boy for trying to take me home. Mad at myself for
getting that drunk.

I walked through the door and threw my purse
on the desk. Candace was sitting on the couch drinking coffee. “You
left me,” I said.

“
There you are,” Candace
said.

“
How could you leave me? You
have no idea what almost happened to me.”

“
Are you okay?” I choked
back tears.

“
I’m fine.”

“
After you and that guy
started dancing. I went to the bathroom and had to wait in line for
twenty minutes. I came back out and I couldn’t find you. I texted
you a million times. Come to find out, you left your phone on the
couch.” She held the phone up to me. “Look, I didn’t know where you
were. I couldn’t sleep. I thought you hooked up with some guy. Then
I thought you might have met up with Heath because he was there at
the party. You were all he asked about.”

“
Candace, please, just don’t
leave me like that again. I just don’t’ like being by myself,
okay?”

“
Sure. Never again. I’m
sorry. So where are you coming from. Your hair’s a
mess.”

“
Heath’s place.”

“
So, you
did
hook up
with him?”

“
Not exactly. That boy I was
dancing with. I was ready to hook up with him. We left the Theta
house and were going to go to his place, but he was just too drunk
to drive. Totally shitfaced. So I said, no let’s go back inside or
at least walk to his place because he couldn’t drive. He was too
wasted. Maybe even more than I was. But then he got forceful with
me. Grabbing my arm and forcing me to the car.”

“
What?
Seriously?”

“
I’m okay. My arm is
probably bruised from that jerk grabbing me. But Heath came out of
nowhere and punched the boy in his face. Knocked him out. What came
after, I don’t remember. I woke up in Heath’s bed. He cooked
breakfast for me.”

“
No man’s ever cooked
breakfast for me. I’m so jealous. I hate you.”

“
I didn’t eat. I just
stormed out of there. I was so embarrassed.”

“
You didn’t stay?” Her face
contorted to a look of contempt. “You’re fucking crazy. A man cooks
for you and you leave?”

“
I didn’t know what to do. I
woke up; I didn’t know where I was. I didn’t want him to see me
like that. It just seemed too good to be true. He seems perfect for
me and it scares the shit out of me.”

“
Why? He’s handsome, has a
rough side, has a killer right hook and he knows his way around a
kitchen. What more can a girl ask for?”

“
I can’t get hurt. I just
can’t. I don’t deserve him.” I sat down on the couch next to
Candace as a tear dripped onto my right arm.

“
Hey,” Candace said inching
closer and wrapping her arm around me. “Honey, what’s
wrong?”

“
Everyone around me ends up
leaving. My dad, Jenni. Anyone who’s ever mattered to me left or
was taken away. I can’t experience that again. It’s just better
this way.” I got up from the couch, went to my room and closed the
door.

***

Over the next week I decided to skip class. I
didn’t want to cross paths with Heath. Though a self imposed
quarantine in my room with the door locked seem ideal, I figured I
would stay away from class and the cafeteria as much as possible.
The embarrassment from the weekend still consumed me. He called and
left text messages, but I didn’t respond. Shame is an unforgiving
bitch.

I just needed time to get myself together. I
didn’t deal with embarrassment well. It couldn’t have come at a
worse time. Just when we had really gotten to know each other. But
I couldn’t deny his absence was painful. I missed his playfulness,
I missed his protectiveness. I missed his laugh. Candace said I was
acting stupid by avoiding him; that I was potentially throwing away
a shot at a good guy because of something silly.

Finally, it was Friday. I decided to text him
after dinner. Instead, Heath beat me to the punch.

Listen. Tonight. 9pm. My place. We’re
knocking this project out tonight. If I have to come over and
kidnap you I will. And yes, that was a threat. ;-p

I didn’t take kindly to threats so I packed
my books and my tablet and headed for Heath’s apartment. Before I
left Candace tossed in two shooters of tequila, three German beers
and a twelve pack of ultra sensitive condoms for good measure.

I gingerly walked up the metal steps to his
apartment. I raised my fist to knock on the door, but I paused. I
sucked in several sharp breaths to calm down and knocked three
times on the emerald colored door marked
Apt C
. Heath
greeted me at his door with a warm hug and a smile. His back was
rippling, swelling with muscles. I wondered if he just came back
from the boxing gym.

“
I didn’t think you’d make
it,” he said with his eyebrows raised.

“
Really, why?” I said
handing him my bag, the bottles jingling inside. I managed to choke
back one of the tequilas before I came up the stairs. I prayed he
didn’t smell my breath.

“
Why?
Are you
serious?” He smirked with a playful grin. “You only avoided me for
like the last week.”

“
Well…”

“
Well, nothing.” He took the
bag and placed it on the couch. “Why did you storm off like that? I
cooked breakfast for you. Selena, I even punched a fucking stranger
in the mouth for you.” He smirked to himself with a bowed
head.

“
And I still have your
headphones.”

“
I don’t deserve this,” he
said as he went into his bedroom. He returned with his laptop and
two highlighters. Here have a seat.” He extended his hand towards
his couch. “Do you need anything to drink? I have water and juice.
No beer. But I’m pretty sure my apartment and beer brings about bad
memories.” He winked at me with a coy expression; it pulled at my
heartstrings.

I scrunched my face up at him and nodded my
head. “Haw-haw. Water is fine.” Heath plopped down on the couch
next to me. He wore a wheat-colored Henley; it fit him perfectly,
snuggling every slope of his biceps. I twisted the top off the
bottle and took a sip. I looked at him as the water rushed over the
edge of my lips. I imagined his lips were on mine.

“
Let’s get started,” he said
opening his laptop.

I was amazed at how adept he was towards the
project. He came up with the idea for the product and the brand
name. He crafted the mission statement and sketched prototype of
the product. I had misjudged him; this entire time I was worried
about doing all the work. I let him take the wheel and sat back in
awe. Several times he caught me sitting back, my arms folded,
staring at him and not at the textbook. He taking control that
reminded me what was missing in my life. And it made me afraid.

After about two hours of highlighting key
points, researching videos, and sighting case studies, my brain was
fried. Heath’s brown eyes had glazed over. He let out an enormous
sigh. “I think I’ve had enough of this shit. How about you?” His
voice was throaty from talking so much. He closed the top down on
the laptop and gazed at the ceiling. We were officially done for
the night.

“
I think my brain hurts,” I
said massaging my forehead.

“
Here let me help.” He
placed his fingers on my temples and slowly rubbed in circles. His
touch was instantly electric. I wanted his fingers to soothe ever
inch of my hips, my breasts and my neck. I bit down on my lip.
“Turn around.” He rubbed my shoulders and upper back. “You're so
tense.” His thumb traced the scar on the back of my neck. Then he
kissed it. My spine trembled.

“
I can’t.” I scurried my
body away from his touch.

“
Why not? Selena. What’s
up?”

“
I just can’t.”

He put his hands on his thighs and grabbed
his jeans. His eyebrows crunched. “Selena,” he said exhaling.
“What’s going on?”

“
It’s nothing.”

He scratched the top of his head with both
hands. “Nothing? Selena, did I do something wrong?”

“
Heath, it’s not you. It’s…”
My voice was wavering, quivering almost. Heath sat back on the
couch with look of disappointment.

“…
It’s me.”

He exhaled a deep breath of dissatisfaction.
“I’ve heard that before. Look, I understand there’s other guys. But
I’m not like most guys. I’m not like that asshole from the night
before.”

“
It’s not that. It’s that I
don’t trust…I-I’m just not rea…Look, I better go.” I stood up and
grabbed my things. I resisted looking him in the eye. I didn’t want
him getting wrapped up my mess of a life.

“
Selena, please.” He gently
grabbed my wrist; although he tugged my wrist softly, I still got
yanked back from his strength. “Don’t leave.” His hands were
shivering and clammy. His eyes were pale and vulnerable.

“
Heath, I’m so sorry.” A
nauseous feeling coated my stomach at the he thought of leaving him
again like this. But I had to. I had to hide. I had to run away. I
just wasn’t ready to let him in. I wasn’t ready to give in to
him.

As I shut the door to his apartment, I knew I
shut the door on him. If I made the right choice, it sure didn’t
feel like it. I walked to my car with a sour taste in my mouth.
Here was a chance to finally step out of the past and I blew
it.

I sat in my car, hearing faint drops of rain
dance on the roof of my car. It was fitting that it would rain at a
moment like this. Normally, I liked the rain, but this wasn’t the
time for it. Tink. Tink. Tink. The droplets increased from light
rain to a full on downpour. I turned the ignition but the engine
didn’t turn over. I gave it a moment then tried again – still no
luck.