Forsaking Gray (The Colloway Brothers Book 1) (20 page)

“Stop. Fix this,” I demand.

“Livvy.” He grabs for me and I sidestep him. I know exactly what he’s doing. He’s using seduction to get what he wants and it’s not going to work this time.
Probably
not.

“I mean it, Gray. I’m not working for you. Fix this. Now.”

“No.”

“No?”

“Correct.” As we’ve been bantering, every step he’s taken toward me, I’ve counter stepped until my back is now against a wall and I have no more moves left to make. His arms have me caged in. My traitorous body thinks this is foreplay and is readying herself for him.

“Why are you doing this?” I breathe.

He leans down, answering directly in my ear. “I’m the boss. I don’t have to have a reason.”

Bastard. Two can play his stupid chess game. I think he’ll find I’ve improved my skills over the years. “Damn you, Gray. You’re going to regret this.” I’ll make his life a living hell until he relents and ships me off back down to Wes. Who will, in turn, make
my
life a living hell now that he knows I’m involved with Gray.

Shit. I am suddenly in a no-win situation.
Damn him!

“Doubtful, angel,” he says right before his lips descend to mine. I expect another bruising, claiming kiss, but instead it’s gentle and reverent and delivers on its intention. To melt my anger away. “You can’t hold the fact against me that I want you by my side every second of every day, Livvy. I’ve been starved without you, and I don’t think I’ll ever get my fill again.”

His words mirror my feelings, but I’m beginning to panic. All the walls I’ve frantically been trying to build to protect myself from the inevitable hurt keep getting obliterated every time I’m with Gray. How long can I hold out before I just say “fuck it” and throw all caution and common sense to the hurricane force winds that are trying desperately to rip it away from me? I need to talk to my therapist. Get some perspective. Now.

“I’m scared.” My voice is so low I don’t think he hears me and honestly, I’m not sure I intended him to. But he does, and his reply doesn’t provide me any comfort. In fact, it reinforces the reason I need to keep myself guarded, and why I should just get the hell out of Chicago and start over somewhere else, alone.

“Me too.” Then my face is in his hands, his intense gaze beseeching mine to believe him. “But I love you so much, Livvy. I’m trying to keep the past where it is and just accept that you’re back in my life and that you love me. We’ll start over. I want to start over.”

God help me, so do I. Can I believe him? Can I trust that he’ll leave the last five years buried, so my sordid world doesn’t taint the future? I want to, but I just don’t know.

His beautiful mouth turns up and I laugh at his next comment. “We’ll take it slow.”

“I think we’re way past slow. We’re more like mach ten with our hair on fire.” And one, or both, of us is bound to get burned.

Soft lips kiss my forehead. “You may be right, but I won’t apologize.”

I sigh, reluctantly accepting my fate for the moment. “I should get back to Bonnie. She’s probably ready to call in reinforcements any second. She seems awfully protective of you.”

He finally steps back, giving me much-needed breathing space. “She is. She’s been with me for quite some time. You have big shoes to fill, but I
trust
you, Livvy.” The way he emphasized one word in that sentence was not lost on me. He trusts me and wants the same in return. I decide to change the subject instead of responding. Yes, we’ve already established that I’m a coward of epic proportions.

“And what about Camille?”

“What about her?” he asks, walking back around his desk, taking a seat.

“Have you been with her?” I can’t believe that envious question slipped past my gritted teeth, but sometimes that green-eyed bitch is wily and unpredictable. I wanted to kick myself the second it did. I have no right to ask questions like that if I’m keeping my secrets hidden.

A slow smile curves his mouth and his eyes twinkle with amusement. “I like that look on you, Livvy. It makes me hard.”

I huff, turn and walk out of his office, closing the door so I can seal out the irritating laughter following me. Bonnie’s standing at her desk and our eyes connect, but instead of reprimand, which is what I expect to see, I see delight and a knowing glint only another woman would recognize.

Great
. She’s onto us, too. I wouldn’t be surprised to see an all-company email blast by noon, or even a poster hanging in the break room announcing our little lurid affair. Not knowing what else to do, I simply shrug my shoulders and walk over to her.

It’s only then I realize Gray never gave me an answer about Camille, and the seeds of jealousy not only take hold, they start growing roots. Damn him.

Chapter 25

Between my other responsibilities, I’ve been pouring over the files Camille pulled. The first one I reviewed was the employment contract on Mr. Nichols and, much to my dismay, we are stuck with him for another eighteen months, or we’ll have to pay a hefty severance package that amounts to more than a million dollars. It would almost be worth it to send his sorry ass packing, and I still may do that, but I’d rather find something that would land him behind bars for, oh, say the next fifteen to twenty instead. Unfortunately so far, I’ve found nothing incriminating.

Imagine his surprise when I moseyed on down to his office on Monday afternoon to discuss his ineptitude at last Friday’s board meeting. The fact that Livvy, who was still as green as a newly bloomed plant, knew information on that patent that he didn’t not only grated on my last nerve, but it just felt all wrong, so I’ve also been doing plenty of digging on that this week as well. And when he tried to blame his incompetence on the fact that Livvy was new and he’d had to spend a great deal of time training her so he didn’t have time to adequately prepare for the meeting, I wanted to both fire him and cut his tongue out on the spot. I made it perfectly clear his days were numbered and I was watching him like a hawk, just waiting to take him down the second he faltered again, contract or not. I would find some way to make that null and void.

“Sorry I’m late,” Conn said before he noticed Asher hadn’t arrived either.

“No problem.”

Conn takes a seat at the round conference table in the corner of my office, where I’m also sitting, before asking, “So…how are things going?”

I can’t help but laugh at the question my brother really wants the answer to.
How are things with Livvy?
I feel lighter and happier than I have in a very long time. It probably shows. “Things couldn’t be better,” I reply.

Other than Monday night, because Livvy was still a little peeved at her re-assignment and felt like she had to punish me, we’ve spent the rest of the week together. She’s even agreed to go to Detroit with me tomorrow. Since she was supposed to see her sister, I told her to invite Alyse and her new boyfriend to dinner at my mom’s house on Saturday night, which she did.

“I’m glad to hear it, Gray.” I knew Conn meant it, but I also know him well enough to know he’s still worried. Ash, on the other hand, was having a hard time accepting that Livvy was back in my life…for good. “She still coming to Mom’s tomorrow?”

“Yes.” And I haven’t yet warned my mom. I need to make that call this afternoon. As with my brothers, I’m not sure how my mom will react to the fact that I’m seeing Livvy again, but I hope she quickly gets on board because Livvy is here to stay. Forever, if I have anything to say about it.

“Hey, sorry I’m late.” Ash rushed through the door, breathing heavy as if he’d just run up the stairs. “The meeting with the auditors ran late. They have me by the balls right now. I can hardly get anything else done.”

“Sorry about that, brother. Any news yet?” I ask.

“No. Far too early for that. And the lead auditor is a raving bitch. I think she either needs a good spanking or to get laid.”

“I’m sure you can help her out with that, Ash,” Conn quips.

“Not going there again,” he mumbles under his breath.

“Again?” I probe, a smile now on my face.

“Forget I said that.” He takes a seat and I start right into business, not wanting to discuss the subject of his bedroom proclivities.

“So, I’ve met with one of the lead developers still on staff to determine everyone who would have known about that patent. It was only a handful that were close to the details, and most are still employed by HMT. I’ve already contacted IT and asked them to pull every email, every instant message, every website and any other scrap of information they can get their hands on relative to each of these individuals, plus I’ve asked them to scour the server for certain words. I’m also pulling the same information on the five people that knew about the patent who are no longer here, including Jeffrey Handy, their former CEO.”

“That’s going to be a lot of shit to go through,” Conn says.

I nod. Yes. Yes, it will and this is something I need to keep on the down low. The fewer people that know about it, the better. But it will take me months to do it by myself, so I plan to assign Livvy her first little project. If it calls for late nights burning the midnight oil, then I guess we’ll just have to do that. Together. At my place. Naked. I smile inwardly at the lascivious thoughts I’m creating in my head of every inch of fair, velvety skin glowing in the firelight as she—

“What about Nichols?” Ash asks, scowling. I guess maybe I was smiling outwardly instead. Whoops.

“So far, I haven’t found anything that points to him, but I’m suspicious. At minimum, he’s an incompetent asshole. At worse, he’s fucked us over and will be spending quite a bit of time becoming someone’s bitch while pulling laundry duty.”

We spend the next hour going over a few other business items before Conn needs to head to another meeting. “Hey Ash,” I call, after Conn has already left.

“What’s up?”

“Close the door for a minute, will you?” He raises his eyebrows but does as I ask. I’m not even sure Livvy’s out there, but I don’t want her overhearing this conversation if she is. “You know Livvy’s coming tomorrow, right?”

His lips thin. I know I’m right to talk to him before we all show up at Mom’s house, and he backs her into a corner, spewing vile and hateful things that she doesn’t need to hear. “I won’t tolerate you treating Livvy with anything less than respect this weekend.”

“Is that so?” Asher crosses his arms, ready for a fight.

I’m not about to throw punches at work, but if he does or says anything that upsets Livvy this weekend, I won’t hesitate. Ash crosses his arms over his chest and I know I’m in for a brotherly lecture. Which I don’t fucking need, but will have to listen to anyway.

“Gray, I’m not even sure if you remember all the shit that you went through, because you were so blitzed out of your mind during that month and a half you spiraled completely out of control, but I do. I was there every single day, cleaning up your puke, throwing half naked whores out of your house, paying your bills and trying to keep you from slowly, deliberately killing yourself. Hell, I even showered your sorry ass because you’d lost all sense of human hygiene. And some shit you just cannot unsee, brother, but I did it. For you. Because you’re my brother and I love you. I’ve already lost one brother and I almost lost another during what was undoubtedly the darkest time of your life, but it was a dark time in mine as well. And Conn’s. And Mom and Dad’s. So you’ll understand if I don’t welcome Livia Kingsley back into our family with open fucking arms because she didn’t just destroy you before, she fucking blew you to smithereens. And I don’t want her to do it again.”

Wow. My head is spinning. Asher and I have never talked about those bleak times, mostly because I tried to shove the memories so deep in my mind, I could almost convince myself they weren’t real, but I had no idea that he’d done all of that for me. And I couldn’t even touch the topic of Luke, my twin. We never talked about Luke and what happened to him. Ever. But damn if I didn’t suddenly feel like a horse’s ass because I hadn’t really taken my family’s feelings into consideration. I’d only thought of myself.

“I’m…I don’t know what to say, Asher. I’m sorry.”

Asher laid his hand on my shoulder. “Look, I want you to be happy, Gray, and only time will tell if Livia’s the one to do that.”

“She is,” I adamantly reply. “She’s the only thing that makes me whole, Ash.”

“Fine. But respect has to be earned and she hasn’t earned mine, so I will be cordial, but that’s it.”

I nod. “I can accept that. I guess. But her sister and boyfriend will be there. Can you at least be pleasant to them?”

“Little Alyse? Sure. I always liked her,” Asher replies as he walks to the door. I don’t miss the brief flare of heat I see at the mention of Alyse’s name.

“You and Conn riding together?” I ask.

“Yep. See you there. We’ll be there by mid-afternoon, or as soon as I can get Conn’s ass out of bed.”

“See you tomorrow,” I murmur, my mind in a whirl.

As Ash leaves, for the first time I waiver. What if Livvy’s right? What if what she’s hiding is so damning, it will destroy what we’re trying to rebuild? What then? Black spots appear in my vision just thinking about that possibility, so I simply can’t. I
won’t
.