FOREWORD (10 page)

On the opposite wall, there is a full-length mirror and she can watch everything that’s happening to her, which she loves to do. By this time Laura is really getting off on her fantasy. She is thinking about this terrible thing that’s happening to her instead of being at her important event and of the people who are expecting her and are wondering what’s happened to her. When I have removed her last shred and she is naked, I chain her in a spread-eagle position on the frame and run my hands over her, telling her all the things I have in store for her and she is squirming and getting off like mad. I then tease and torment her with a variety of sexual toys from my armamentarium until she is begging and promising to do anything I want. When I let her down we settle in for a grand evening of fun and fucking. We only do this scene once a week or so in order to keep it fresh and so Laura can build up a strong anticipation.

For personal data, I am thirty-eight, average height. I am a university graduate and operate my own enterprise. I am a Catholic and though I am of a type that a pope or prelate would have difficulty discerning, I am one all the same.

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LES

I am thirty-seven years old, have been married two and a half years, have no children. I am well educated with B.S.

and M.S. degrees and am a public official. I have been masturbating most of my life since I was about twelve years old.

In my earlier days, in junior high, I remember masturbating and fantasizing about being tied up to a chair and taunted, sexually, by one of the girls in my class. I have also in more recent years fantasized about fucking some of the girls I knew and was either going out with or wanted to go with.

Lately, however, my fantasies have turned to a more homosexual vein, as I have become very sexually excited when corresponding with another male for the purpose of going sixty-nine with him or having him fuck me.

At first I merely fantasized this activity, but in the past few months I have actively sought out this situation, though not very successfully. I have gotten responses from two men I wrote to, after I had sent them Polaroid pictures of my erect penis in various positions, and also tracings of my penis and even some of my juices and cum on my letter. I never did get together with either of these persons, however. My most recent experience took place when I went to another town for a meeting. While I was in a park, I had to use the public wash-room and I was immediately turned on by the messages that were written on the walls about people wanting blow jobs and fucking, and wanting to suck someone off. I wrote down my own message and told where to contact me at a motel. I then wrote down some of the phone numbers on the wall.

Back at the motel, I excitedly waited for someone to call and fantasized how I would meet them at the door completely nude with a huge hard-on.

When I called the numbers I wrote down, I got completely nude and played with myself. I finally talked with one fellow who was very experienced but really nice about it when I told him that I was not. We never did get together. Later on that evening, about 4:00 A.M., my phone rang and a fellow asked Nancy Friday

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if he could come over and talk about my message and I agreed. I was very excited, but after he came over and we talked awhile, I seemed to get turned off and asked him to leave. After that I masturbated again and had a hard time getting back to sleep.

I have the idea that the fellow that I have sex with should be young and slim and smaller than I am – most of the other persons I contacted in the past were as big or bigger physically than I am (by the way I am six-three and weigh one hundred ninety). I still think I would like to suck someone’s dick and feel his hot cum in my mouth as I do in my fantasies. But in the final analysis, I guess my reluctance to really do, it relates back to my strong Catholic upbringing and the massive amount of guilt I have experienced most of my life. I enjoy masturbating so much, however, that I have continued it even in marriage. My wife does not know, though I think she suspects it.

WARREN

I am thirty-three years of age, white, divorced and remarried. Throughout my early years, ten to sixteen, I always ran around the house in the nude, whenever I was alone. My real parents were divorced and I was adopted by my grandparents.

My first real sexual encounter was with my real mother. We were swimming at the beach and she pulled her huge breasts out of her swimming suit. She let me play with them and suck on her large nipples. She also started playing with my cock.

Later that day, after we were home, she let me look at her pussy and then introduced me to sexual intercourse. I do not think this hurt me, in fact in many ways I believe it actually helped me in getting experience and self-confidence.

At the age of seventeen, I joined the Air Force and I am still in the Air Force. I have been to three Air Force specialty schools and now I am in Computer Analysis.

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My first marriage lasted for eleven wonderful years, during which we had two beautiful daughters.

During my adolescence, I was always told I had an extremely large penis; actually, my penis grew before the rest of me. Now, I am only average. Because I have always heard that women got turned on by large cocks, I was an exhibitionist for a short period of time. Then one day I discovered I was more turned on by men looking at my wife instead of women looking at me. My fantasy grew and grew. I envisioned a salesman coming by and my wife wearing a see-through blouse, miniskirt, minus all undergarments. He sits across from her and she sits so he has a good shot at her beautiful dark-haired pussy. They eventually wind up on the couch or floor fucking like hell. I am hiding, watching his cock slide in and out of her pussy and the expression of pleasure on her face.

I eventually got around to telling my wife my fantasy. She thought I was sick and should see a shrink. Gradually, I talked her into flashing a service station attendant in a gas station, then a salesman and a few repairmen. She never did enjoy it, but it led to really great sexual encounters between the two of us. She gradually started to like flashing younger boys and finally seduced a sixteen-year-old who had a cock like a horse. I watched the whole thing, and as soon as he got off, I was in her. Her cunt was steaming hot and as wet as Niagara Falls. It was fantastic. Still, it was all done to please me. She wasn’t doing it because she enjoyed it. Gradually it led to the destruction of our marriage. I remarried too soon, and my present wife and I are extremely incompatible sexually. My dreams and fantasies are now of a beautiful dark-haired woman who shares my interests sexually, and otherwise. Together, we seduce men, women and boys, through her exhibitionism.

Still it’s a fantasy, for I have come to realize that I shall never find a woman as sexual as I am, especially one with exhibitionist tendencies, as they simply do not exist.

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Incidentally, although I loved your books, I find it hard to believe that even a minority of women are as sexual as your books depict. I rather feel that the majority of letters you have received are from men, describing how they wish their wives would think and dream or be.

CHRISTOPHER

Here’s a fantasy of mine that came to life last spring. I’ve never told anyone about this experience until now. I’m a twenty-two-year-old guy, born and bred in Washington, D.C.

I’ve had this fantasy for a few years. It basically includes having a girl serve me sexually, and spanking her from time to time.

Well, last April I was walking with Carol, a close friend with whom I’ve never had sex. We shared intimate secrets –

including me telling her that I’d love to fuck her and her declining. Carol mentioned a movie (X-rated) that we passed in the street. I don’t remember the movie’s title but it was about a teen-age girl being kidnapped, tied up, and raped, according to the description that the theater ran. She commented on how exciting that sounded. Later, we stopped by her apartment for some food. We got pretty high after dinner, and I steered the conversation back to the subject of the movie.

Carol (she was nineteen then) seemed pretty excited about the film’s subject matter. She told me she’d always fantasized about being raped and treated roughly by her attacker. Maybe if we weren’t so high what followed wouldn’t have happened.

I grabbed Carol by the shirt and ripped it open, literally.

She started to put up a struggle but I could tell it was just a mock effort. I kissed her hard, on the lips, and forced her to kneel on the floor before me. I told her to take out my cock and “kiss it,” in those words, till I came in her mouth. The sight of her fulfilling an old-time fantasy of mine, along with the view I had of my hard-on going in and out of Carol’s Men In Love

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beautiful face, quickened my orgasm. Carol couldn’t keep my come in her mouth; and pulled her mouth away. I kept shooting on her cheeks.

I made her undress me and then I took off the rest of her clothes. Again playing the part, she began to struggle. So I grabbed some twine from the kitchen and tied her by the wrists to the bedposts. I decided to be fair and fulfill a fantasy she had mentioned earlier, namely eating her pussy as she lay on her back, totally helpless. It didn’t take long for her to come. Now I was hard again.

I turned Carol over so that she lay on her stomach. This time I tied her arms together over her head. One thing I’d always wanted to see was a chick masturbating – for real, not like in Penthouse, et al. I ordered her to play with herself, and told her to get up on her knees to do it.

With Carol’s ass sticking out as she kneeled on the bed, I gave her a hard smack on the tush. She didn’t say anything, but stopped playing with herself for a moment. I pushed her hands, which were still roped together at the wrist, back to her pussy. Then I gave her a half-dozen more hard spanks on her bottom. Carol’s ass was pink from the treatment I was giving it. I untied her hands, then retied them behind her back. She collapsed onto her stomach, but I wasn’t through with her yet.

For a finale, I was going to fuck her hard, with her arms and legs spread-eagled on the bed. But as Carol lay on the bed, face down with her hands still bound behind her, she yelled, “Fuck me from behind!” I was happy to oblige, and after dipping my hard-on into her cunt for lubrication, I jammed it (much too hard, I regret) into her asshole. Unfortunately for her, Carol was asking me to fuck her cunt from behind. But I misunderstood and slid up her ass. Carol moved her butt back and forth trying to dodge the thrusts of my prick. The more she wiggled her ass, the better it felt for me, and I had the orgasm of my life when I came between the cheeks of her derriere.

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Some fantasies should be lived out. For instance, the timid man who dreams of asking a beautiful girl for a date might well put fears of rejection aside and act on his wish. Even if she says no – even if the worst happens and she laughs at him

– something will be gained: confirmation that being put down by a beautiful girl is not death. Courage is often a matter of learning that you can survive doing things that frighten you.

Do it often enough and the fear is tamed.

Being rejected by a beautiful girl you don’t know doesn’t cost much. You didn’t have anything to begin with. Deciding to act out a fantasy with someone you love risks forever scarring a relationship that means a great deal.

You may think it would be thrilling to make love to your wife in a secluded corner of the beach; the remote possibility of discovery only adds spice. If she does not agree, it does not mean she is inhibited; it merely means that your fantasy is not her fantasy. For you to demand it in the name of love does not prove you are freer than she – only bossier, or more frightening. While Penrod (above) tells us he was able to

“coerce” his wife into fulfilling one of his fantasies, he doesn’t connect the fear she must have of him with what he describes as their “deficient” marital sex life. Penrod’s solution is to find women who are thrilled to help him put into practice those fantasies too “dirty” for his wife. Evidence of his masculine conflict can be seen in the statement that despite his wife’s puritanism he’d rather be married to her than to any of the more permissive women he meets. “I would never consider having such a deep commitment [as with Mrs.

Penrod] with any other person.” For all her no saying, something in her must satisfy him very strongly.

Let’s say the fantasy you want to act out is not as prob-lematic as any of those mentioned by Penrod, but one as idyllic as the aforementioned lovemaking on a beach. It still may not turn out happily.

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The fantasy is thrilling because while it is still in your mind, you are running the whole show: lights, camera, action.

Not only have you made the sky blue and brought sweet music to play in the air and caused the sand not to rasp in embarrassing places, you have also choreographed the emotions for any people who might stumble upon you. You have written that they can only show amazement, admiration, and the desire to imitate you by joining in. But if the scene ever happened in real life, the emotion you might feel before strangers could well be such burning shame that you (and she) might never forget it. Les (above) started to put his homosexual fantasies into practice, but in the end decided not to. “I guess my reluctance ... relates back to my strong Catholic upbringing.” Whatever the reason for reluctance, if it is there, think again.

None of us is merely the product of our adult minds. The values by which you were raised are probably more firmly embedded in your conscience – your sense of right and wrong – than you realize. Reading a book or magazine article is not enough to free you to do everything you previously felt was forbidden. Behind the facade of enjoying the group sex her husband has talked her into, Mrs. Warren (above) seems really to have been getting off on fantasies of submission to her husband’s wishes. If she loved what he was making her do, why was there so much anger? Warren found that persuading his wife to act out his sexual fantasies was the end of a marriage he experienced as “eleven wonderful years.” Christopher’s letter (above) raises an important point: even after talking about your mutual fantasies, there may not be a true meeting of minds. Once passions are aroused by putting fantasies into action, unexpected and possibly dangerous energies may be released, if only because even in the wildest of sexual scenes something in us resists saying exactly what we mean.
Fuck me from behind
, Carol says to Christopher.