Forever Viper (31 page)

“You and Noah are the best thing that has happened to me in all my years on earth, but since we met nothing has gone right. I have had to lie to you, caused you pain and tonight led to you being attacked. I could have lost you Peppa and I could have lost Noah to the blood lust. I watched my brother suffer from it and I can’t go through that again.”

My head snaps to Juan and I wipe the tears from my face, “Surely, if Noah is lost, he wouldn’t be sitting here now. Forgive me, as I’m not up on your vampire’s ways, but wouldn’t he be out there killing to get his fix or even feasting on me right now? I was attacked, nearly raped and heard someone die. Yes, things could have been very different, but I’m alive Juan. You and Noah made sure of that. I don’t blame Noah for killing Jacob. I’m glad the bastard is dead so stop blaming yourself. What was the point of saving me, if you are now going to take yourself out of the equation?”

Noah shuffles closer to me and my heart shatters as I await Juan’s answer. I lean my head on Noah’s shoulder. Silence is what we are greeted with and my heart sinks and I sob out the next words, “Do you love us Juan?”

It didn’t take him long to answer that, “Yes I do, love is the beauty of the soul and I have found that with you both. I’m a vampire Peppa and I do things differently. I need to protect our race, but in doing that I have to protect you. I have let you down time and time again and I have destroyed us because of that. How do I go on Peppa? You will be better off without me.”

I close my eyes and everything inside of me stops working, I struggle for breath and my stomach drops. A fury that I have no idea existed inside of me builds and I react by tearing myself away from Noah, screaming and leaping on top of Juan causing him to fall flat on his back. My hands ball into fists and I beat them down on his chest while hollering at him, “Don’t say that! I love you! You can’t leave me!”

Juan lets me hit him time and time again and I cry harder each time my fists make contact. Tears spring from his eyes and his hands move to cover his face and he shakes his head from side to side calling out my name. My hands are stopped in mid-air by a pair of stronger hands as I try and land another punch.

Noah’s sadness comes through as his voice cracks with his next words, “Please stop Peppa, this isn’t getting us anywhere. You are both causing me so much torment. I can’t take anymore. I’m walking away, I’m getting in that car and I’m choosing to stay.”

Noah drops my hands, pushes himself away from the ground to stand, and peers down at us both. Panic starts to rise in me and I reach out for him. He smiles weakly at me then glances at Juan, “My soul belongs to you Juan, you know how I feel. The world goes on and I intend to live in it. I want to get married and have some kids. I want a future with Peppa. Please think on that, because you belong in that future too.”

He then storms away, leaving us alone and my heart goes with him. Marriage and kids isn’t something I have thought about, but I wouldn’t rule it out. I close my eyes out of relief that one of my men is safe and once I watch Noah open the car door and get in I collapse on top of Juan and let my emotions show. My body trembles in apprehension. I know this is my last chance to get Juan to see sense. His arms curl around me and I lift my head to rest my chin on his chest at the feel of them. His eyes rest on the skyline avoiding mine, “Juan, please look at me and tell me what you see?”

He closes his eyes and his head slowly moves downwards. “Open your eyes and look into my soul.”

His eyes snap open and he looks inside of me. Tears gather at the corner of his eyes, “What do you see Juan?”

A strangled sound leaves his mouth and then he says, “Fear.” and I say, “What else?”

His eyes close again and he sobs out, “Love.” I move my head so my lips are in line with his and his eyes open wide as I place a soft kiss to them. “Take another look Juan, you're missing one more thing.” I make sure he senses what I want him to through the connection and his arms embrace me tighter as he bursts out in tears.

“I forgive you Juan. Noah’s letters made me realize the reasoning behind the lies and I forgive you for that, I really do. Forgetting the hurt I feel because of your actions is the problem I’m finding hardest to let go of. But I will get over that Juan, with your help. No more lies, no more taking all of our problems on and bottling them up. There are three of us in this relationship. I don’t want you to protect me from everything Juan: talk to me, to us. You are not alone in this, we are in it all together.” My eyes start to leak again and the tears fall onto Juan’s face where they mix with his.

He opens his mouth and quietly lets out, “You really forgive me? Are you sure you can move on from this?”

I push myself up so I straddle his lap and I wipe away his tears. “I love you Juan Cassidy. Forgiveness doesn’t change the past, but it does enlarge the future.”

I then push myself away from him to stand and peer down at his beautiful face memorizing it. I point over to the car, “I’m walking away now, and your future awaits you in that car. Now you have to decide if you want it.”

I put one foot in front of the other and begin to stride away and I hear what can potently be his last words to me as he says, “I love you Peppa Thorne.” I barely hold myself up right as my heart breaks, but I keep on walking and I mutter back to him, “I love you too Juan Cassidy.” I walk past Saul and Cruz and say, “It’s up to him now.”

When I reach the car, I turn back to take one last look at the man who stole my heart to see him now standing, gazing out at the fading stars and moon. I close my eyes and shed more tears only to sense a rush of air and a hand to my face as it brushes them away. Lips meet mine and I open them for him knowing his taste and I let his desperate kiss take me over and I melt into his arms. He pulls away first and I take gulps of air as he completely stole my breath away.

His forehead comes down to rest on mine, “Who needs the sun, when I have you and Noah to burn me up and set me aflame. I’m not perfect Peppa none of us are, but I want a future where we can be happy and hopefully have that family Noah mentioned. I want to be that man that you can trust and I will work on building that up and I promise I will never break it again.”

A cough comes from behind us, “Sorry brother, but can you finish talking in the car? Sunrise is coming and I really don’t want to fry. Although, I could fry your dick off for this stunt.”

Juan gives me a quick kiss and asks me to get in the car and he quickly turns to grasp Saul and pulls him into his arms. I leave them to it and open the door only to be pulled against a hard chest and Noah weeps in my arms causing my heart to burst wide open.

The passenger’s side door opens and all I hear is Cruz’s voice as he shouts out, “Thank fuck for that! We can’t play O2 next Saturday night without our drummer.”

Groans come next as Juan and Saul both shout, “Shut up Cruz!”

They all pile in the car and Juan’s arms engulf Noah and me. We all whispers words of sorry and I love you through our tears. Cruz groans, “Jade put your foot down and get us back to your house ASAP. I’m going to need a bucket soon with all the love going on back here.”

It’s funny, because with that sentence it causes a ripple effect between the three of us and we all end up laughing. Jade does put her foot down and Cruz didn’t seem to want to shut up and lets me know he paid a visit to Detective Payne. Everyone else chips in with what happened when I left Café Net but my biggest surprise is how Juan disposed of Jacob’s body. Dawn is approaching fast and when we made it back to Jade’s everyone quickly said their goodnights. I find myself sandwiched between my men, where I belonged, where I felt safe.

Noah kisses me first, I can see his eyes are getting heavy, “Thank you for bringing him back to us. Marry me Peppa Thorne be…” the next thing to come out of his mouth is a snore and I’m left shocked to the core.

Juan closes my gaping mouth and presses a kiss to my lips, “That was said in the heat of the moment. Prepare yourself Peppa because when a marriage proposal does come, it will be from the both of us.”

My eyes literally pop out of my head and Juan chuckles and closes my mouth once again. His face then turns serious as he lets out a yawn. “You saved me tonight. I couldn’t see straight and you steered me back onto the right path. Love will never be enough to show you what you mean to me. Goodnight my forever.”

Tears roll down my cheeks as Juan is taken away from me in sleep. One of my arms wraps around Juan’s waist and the other around Noah’s. And I cry for what I could have lost tonight and I cry for my future because I know these two men are it for me. But with that comes another question and I fall to sleep knowing the answer to that. I just needed Noah and Juan to understand my reasoning.

Chapter 19 (JUAN)

I'm not looking forward to this one bit, facing your lover’s father to hear them explain where they have been is one thing, but I'm not sure what Noah is willing to keep secret or what he is going to share. Noah is pacing in the room when I arrived. He is muttering away. It sounds like he is having a one way conversation with himself. He keeps saying, “I can do this, it’s only my father.”

I say, “Hello.” He acknowledged I am there by taking my wrist, biting it and sucking away. He takes a lot so I know I have to pay Dolly a visit later. “Ok, I’m ready, let’s go.”

He walks to the door and I mutter under my breath, “Hello Juan, how are you.”

Still nothing, he is lost in his own thoughts. About a mile away from Devil Records I can smell them, humans and a lot of them at that. Noah is oblivious that I called out to him a few times, but I have to grab him and force him to stop running. “Noah for fuck's sake, take a sniff of the air, use your senses.”

His nostrils flare, then his eyes dilate and his hunger flares. “Fight it Noah.” I hold him while he does and I'm proud of him that it didn’t take him long.

Noah’s anger then takes over, “Fuck, what’s going on? Why are there so many people about? I need to do this Juan.”

I understand why he wants to confront his father, I really do, so I say, “Will you be ok if I go and have a quick look.” He nods his head.

I stay in the shadows and get as near as I can, take in the scene and head back to Noah. “I’m sorry Noah, there is no way in hell you are getting past that lot, the press are surrounding Devil Records. I don’t think your father is going to get out of there alive.”

Noah punches the wall and the word fuck becomes his new favourite word. He turns back to me and frowns, “Peppa said Lara had told her it is a nightmare at the moment. I stupidly thought that because we are vampires we could get past them. Shit Juan, I promised Peppa I would get this sorted tonight.”

I take him in my arms, “I know but believe me, there is no way to get through unless you want the press to know first that you are alive and well.”

He shakes his head and steps back from me. “I guess that’s that then, but I will find a way. I need to see my father.” He is quiet on the way back and once again is lost in thoughts.

After saying goodbye, I head straight for tonight’s gig and luckily it turned out well. I try to put my feelings on hold and lose myself in Viper and it works up to a certain point, but I'm not myself and I don’t know how long I can keep up this act. I can see my brother is worried about me. It is in the way he looks at me, but as soon as the show is over I am out of there. I subconsciously end back at the top of the hill after feeding from Dolly and just sit there for a while. I feel useless and each passing day without Peppa in my life leaves me dying a little more inside.

The next night Noah is on edge again but his stubbornness shows through as he explains how he deceived the press. After feeding him, I ask a few questions. I need to know if he has any idea what he is going to say and if he wants me to use my mind control at any point. He explains what he wants me to do and I agree to back him up and let him know I am right by his side in all this.

Once we arrive there, we haven’t taken into account that Peppa will be right across the road. We are so focused on Noah letting his father know he is alive and well that we both stood dumbstruck watching the Café for a sight of her. Voices bring us back to our purpose and I quickly push Noah against the wall and kiss him covering his body with mine so the people who are leaving work won’t see their missing boss. After a few, ‘Oh my god’s’ there is silence as they walk past but I can sense their eyes on us. I push Noah in front of me and hope if they are still gaping at us they can’t tell who he is. Noah walks inside and I follow, we both use the backstairs so we hopefully won’t come across any more people.

Noah stands outside his office door and I notice him hesitate for a moment. Then there is no choice but for him to make himself known as the door swings open and Lara freezes on the spot at the sight of him. Her face floods with confusion and then relief as her tears surface and she throws herself at Noah. Words are spoken between them but my attention is firmly on Donald as he stumbles back and falls into the chair staring voiceless at Noah.

After a few minutes all you can hear is Lara's hysterical crying as Noah glares over at his father and says, “I guess you weren’t expecting me. I’m back father and we need to have a little chat.” Noah tries to free himself of Lara but she is holding onto him for dear life. He asks me for a little help and I try and talk to Lara but she kept saying, “No please, he might disappear again.”

Noah tells her he isn’t going anywhere, that he is back for good, but still no luck. In the end he asks me quietly to use my mind control and can I sit with her outside while he talks privately with his father and he will call me when he needs me? Noah pulled Lara away from him just enough for me to get her to glance at me with my next words, “Lara, I think your father would like to welcome Noah back too.”

I have her then. Our eyes lock and she is entrapped by my power and my voice penetrates her mind, “Lara come and sit with me outside while your father and Noah talk.”

She nods her head and I reach out a hand for her to take. She takes a step away from Noah, takes my hand and I lead her away and sit her down on one of the chairs outside of the office. As I hear the door close, Donald finally finds his voice, “What the hell did that bastard do to your sister?”