Forever Love (7 page)

I stand up and start to pace, dragging my hands through my loose waves.

"I'm not the right girl for you Noah, what I'm about would make living in this house near on impossible when alls said and done."

"And you think it's not impossible right now. I'm nearly losing my damn mind here and you've been hiding in your room for the past two days."

"What do you want from me Noah?" My voice is a near whisper.

"Your real reason for running, I guess. Give me something here, Liv."

"I have casual sex with most half decent guys I meet. I can't have a proper relationship with a guy without feeling like the world is about to end. Is that what you wanna hear Noah? So yes I ran. You scare the fuck out of me. That kiss.......shit. I can't give you want. I can't be your fuck buddy because as soon as it ends this house will be a nightmare to live in for both of us. And deep down, I don’t think you want that kind of relationship with me, fuck buddies don’t punch guys for putting their arm around you. They don’t take you to romantic fields to look at the fucking stars. You scare me, hell you terrify me with the things I feel after four days. It's been four days Noah, what's it gonna be like after four weeks or four months." Noah sits there motionless, just staring at me. I've said way too much and feel a sliver of panic at the amount I've just told him.

"So that’s what this is. Fear?"

I close my eyes, he just doesn’t get it.

"I'm not giving up Liv. You're not the only one that’s feeling unfamiliar feelings and they scare me too. I won't give up because there's a little voice inside my head that’s saying if we take a chance on this, it could be the best thing that’s ever happened to both of us."

I'm left speechless, my hearts beating out of my chest. The butterflies are doing all kinds of tricks in my stomach. I stand there, just staring at the delectable guy now standing in front of me, telling me he's not gonna give up, that he thinks I'm the best thing that could ever happen to him. He comes closer as I stand there completely immobile. I don’t think I could move if I wanted to. He bends a little towards me, giving me a soft gentle kiss on the corner of my mouth that sends tingles over my lips. I close my eyes and soak up the feeling of his mouth on my own, even if for just a second. He comes close to my ear.

"I'm not giving up Liv. I'm the guy for you and I'm gonna damn well make you see it too." He whispers in my ear, causing goosebumps to rise on my skin.

And then he's gone, Maybe I'm crazy, maybe I've finally lost my mind but deep down, there's a part of me that hopes he's right.

Chapter 7

Liv (Again)

I storm into the kitchen, ready to have a total bitch fit. My Dad's sitting at the counter reading his morning paper and everyone else is God knows where. I'm instantly grateful that Noah's not here as I've had enough of picturing his face all night as it is. To say I'm in a pissy mood would be the understatement of the year.

"That’s it, I've had enough of that little fucker. He's gotta go."

My Dad sighs and lowers his paper as if I'm being a big fucking inconvenience with my little girl problems.

"Language Liv."

"Control the rodent and I wouldn’t feel the need to use my so called language."

"What's happened?" I drop my soiled shoe on the countertop in front of him. See how fucking blasé he is when there's fucking shit where he eats.

"That damn cat shit in my shoe."

Of course at that moment, everyone else has to come walking through the door. Noah, with his tight blue t shirt and light faded jeans makes me lose my train of thought for a second. He looks a whole lot better than I do with my clothes half hazardly thrown on and my hair a wet mess.

"What did Sylvester do?" Pam says all concerned and shit.

It's her fucking cat so its her fucking fault in my book. I point to my precious taupe Kurt Geiger chunky sandal lying on the countertop. Everyone gathers round it like it's some alien autopsy.

"Your cat crapped in my two hundred dollar shoe. He-" I have to take a deep breath to calm myself before I run up the stairs and strangle the little poufed up fucker. "He looked at me as he fucking did it."

The room is silent, apart from Chase whose trifling through the cupboards. Everyone bursts out laughing. Un-fucking-believable. Maybe I should shit in all their shoes, see how they like it.

"Aaaaaaaaaarrrrggggghhhhhhh" I screech as I storm back out the room up the stairs.

My Dad the traitorous bastard is meant to be on my side and Noah, yeah this a great way to win me over. I slam my bedroom door, causing the wall the shake as I turn to look at my one surviving shoe. I swear I only left the room for fifteen damn minutes to come back to the cat squatting over my new shoes. I fight the urge to throw the shoe outta the window, maybe it would land on one of their windshields, bet they wouldn’t think it was oh so funny then. I grab my hairdryer from the drawer, plugging it in and then blasting my hair. Since apparently Sylvester the little asshat furball is an inside cat I'm considering just leaving the front door open for the ratfaced fucker.

I've had about two hours of sleep, I couldn’t close my eyes without seeing Noah's green pools staring back at me. If that wasn’t bad enough, it's my first day at a new school and I look like shit. Aaaah who cares if I'm a little late anyway, my appearance is much more important than some diploma. Damn I sound just like Pams mom. That woman's enough to make me consider gaining a hundred and fifty pounds if it will get her off my back. Woman seems to think I aspire to be Honey fucking Boo Boo.

I straighten my hair and I don’t know what the hell I was worried about, it looks great. I pull off my clothes that I'd set out before my shower. I'd chucked them on quickly after finding the cat using my shoe as a litter box. They're all damp now. I browse through my closet, pulling along hangers. I need to look good for my first day.

I settle on a sun dress, it's got a pale blue skirt and white top with a bandeau neckline. It shows more than enough leg, since it's one or the other. There are too many sluts about that don’t get you either show a lot of leg or a lot of chest, never both. I put a red shimmer gloss on my lips. My flat Fendi sandals finish my look and I think I look pretty damn good. The fact that I look good definitely puts me in a better mood and now I'm not quite ready to kill a bitch.

***

I don’t know what Noah's idea of making me see he's the guy for me is but it sure is different to mine. Mine would be not pissing me the hell off. So now I'm stuck in the car with him on the way to school since he insisted I had to drive with him because I don’t know my way. Hasn’t he heard of a Sat Nav? I haven't driven my precious Mini in days and to be perfectly honest, I was hoping for a little alone time on the drive to school to clear my thoughts. I really don’t need to be starting my day at a new school with my mind in disarray which is precisely what is happening with Noah in such close proximity. If that wasn’t bad enough, we're completely alone. Chase decided that it was social suicide for him to turn up on his first day at High school with his big brother so he caught the bus.

We've now been in the car for ten minutes and Noah still hasn’t spoken a word which is more than unsettling. Every now and again I'll catch him staring at my legs out of the corner of my eye, which is the only sign that he even knows I'm still in the car. The silence is deafening, not even the radio is on. I can't take it anymore.

"I can drive you know. I don’t need a chauffeur."

"Yep the midget-mobile in the driveway was a big hint that you can drive."

Seriously, what the hell is wrong with this guy? Last night he's telling me he can't stop thinking about me and he's not letting me go and now he's being a total jackass.

"PULL OVER!" I yell.

He looks at me with wide eyes as he makes a sharp turn to the side of the road on the quiet street.

"What's up? Are you sick?" Oh so he's been a total asshole for the entire drive and now he's all concerned.

"Yes, I'm sick of you. What the fuck is your problem? You’ve been a total jerk since we got in the car. I mean, why the hell did you kick up such a fuss to drive me if you're just gonna be a tool?"

He runs his hands through his hair. He doesn’t look as tired as he did yesterday, actually he looks pretty drool worthy is you ask me. He turns an apologetic look my way that just makes him look completely adorable.

"I'm sorry I've been a dick."

"Well why were you?" I'm really struggling to hold onto my annoyance with that look on his face. Maybe I should stick a bag on his head or something, I'm sure I could stay pissed at him then.

"Why'd you wear that?"

HUH?!

"Wear what?" I look down at my outfit, trying to work out what the hell he's talking about.

"That dress. Oh fuck." He's back to running his fingers through his hair and I'm completely lost. "I'm gonna get suspended the first day of school, guys are gonna be all over you in that."

I don’t know whether I should I be offended that he's saying my outfit is basically gonna give the come on to guys, or flattered that he's bothered by it.

"Nuh uh, we've already had that conversation. I don’t give a fuck what you think about what I wear, it's none of your business and-"

"None of my business?"

Wow, he looks sexy when he's angry.

"No, why would it be? And please explain what the hell is wrong with my outfit because last I checked my tits arent hanging out the top and my ass isn't hanging out the bottom. In my book, that means it's ok."

"There's nothing wrong with your outfit, you look fucking gorgous. You'd look gorgeous in anything. I'm just dreading this ok, I don’t want other guys looking at you."

I don’t know what to say to that. If this was any other guy I'd have given them a reality check but with Noah it feels different. My feelings are way too confused right now. I still can't offer him what he wants, I can't be his girlfriend or whatever the fuck it is. Part of me likes the thought of being his girlfriend though, holding hands walking down the street and making out in the car or whatever it actually is that people in relationships do. I've never done that stuff before, it's only ever been wham bam, thank you ma'am.

This is why I wanted alone time, to think all of this shit through. I've got enough to deal with today without this on top of it. I decide to ignore his last statement until I can ponder it a little more thoroughly.

"Come on, let's go. We're gonna be late and I really don’t wanna be the new kid walking into class when everyone else has already sat down."

Noah looks at me for a few more seconds, then gives a nod of his head and starts the car back up.

Luckily we're only round the corner from the school so there isn't much more awkward silence. The parking lots full but Noah swings his car into a free spot right next to the single storey school building. Dickwad Brady is leaning against some big ass SUV in the next space over with his face firmly attached to Cindy's. They must have their own spots since its too coincidental that there's a free spot in an otherwise jam-packed parking lot, right next to Dickwad.

Noah gets out of the car, pulling both of our backpacks from the back seat and coming round my side to open the door. He scowled at me earlier when I went to open my own door as if I committed some capital offense. I might as well give him a break and let him get his own way some of the time. I'm not into that feminism bullshit anyway, its nice to have people do nice things for me.

Cindy pulls from Dickwad and comes running over.

"Oh Liv, you look great. Its so cool you're gonna be going here."

"Hey you look great too." And she does in her white skinny jeans with a light green cami. She's a beautiful girl with shoulder length black hair and pale skin.

I like Cindy and figure I could easily become friends with her. Then again, you'd think we were already friends despite the fact we've only ever had a single conversation.

Dickwad bumps fists with Noah and then has the nerve to come in and give me an awkward one armed hug. I'm sure he does that shit to piss Noah off since he's got a shit eating grin on his face and Noah looks about ready to kick his ass. Cindy gives me a questioning look that I have to look away from. It's not like we're normal people that just go to the same High School that made out. No, we live together and everyone sees us as step-brother and sister. Everytime I think of Noah as my step-brother I get a sick feeling in the bottom of my stomach. Not because I think we're doing anything wrong, but because everyone else will. I don’t know when I started giving a fuck what other people think, that shit never usually bothers me. A lot of things seem to have changed in the five days since I got here. I definitely feel lighter, I don’t know if that’s because I'm two hundred miles away from the Bitch or if it's something to do with Noah. Probably both. I'm definitely not cursing as much as well since I usually have a real potty mouth.

"At least we're not late." Noah says to me while giving me his standard half a grin.

"Dude, first period's free for Seniors remember. Apparently its to get all our lockers and classes sorted." Brady looks mighty pleased.

"Do you need to go register Liv?" Cindy asks.

"No it's ok, my Dad sorted it all in the Summer for me. I've got my class list and locker number."

"What's your locker number? Hopefully you're near my girl here since those lockers are like a pit of snakes." 

I unzip my backpack and pull the scrunched up papers out, flicking through them. I'm not exactly one for organization. Hell, if I let Pam anywhere near these, the neat freak would probably laminate them.

"Erm 468."

Noah snatches the paper from my hand before giving Brady a look. I'm completely baffled.

"This has gotta be a mistake." Noah says clutching onto the paper.

"Why? What's wrong?"

"Anything in the four hundreds is the guy side. Five hundreds is the girls. Your locker's basically smack bang in the middle of a bunch of guys." Dickwad answers, smirking while looking at Noah.

"Oh well, it's just a locker,"

We walk to the senior corridor which is bustling with students. I've had more than a few stares and whispers and even a few whistles. Noah walks me to my locker which is as Dickwad said, smack bang in the middle of a bunch of guys. His face is like thunder, I glance to the other side of the corridor which is filled with giggling, squealing girls. I more than feel the attention on me as I open my locker. If it wasn’t bad enough that I'm the new kid, I'm now the only girl surrounded by a bunch of horny guys.

"Don’t you need to go sort your locker?" I say to Noah though he completely ignores me.

A small guy with thick rimmed glasses comes the other side of me. He does a double take and I almost burst out laughing at his panicked expression.

"Hey, Carl isn't it?" Noah says nearly causing him to have a full blown panic attack. I wonder if I should get the nurse or something because this guy looks as if he's about to keel over.

"Y-yeah." His voice is nasally and I can't believe how cliché he is. Poor kid just needs acne and braces to go full throttle into the nerd category.

"Swap lockers with me?" Despite Noah putting it as a question, it definitely isn't one.

"S-s-sure." If it wasn’t so tragic, the way Carl escapes as if he's running for his life, it would be funny.

"You didn’t need to do that. I can more than look after myself."

"I wanted to."

He opens what was formerly Carls but is now his locker as a pink clawed hand grips onto his arm.

"Noah, you never called me." That whiny voice sounds vaguely familiar and when I see the red head twirling her hair next to him I know why.

What's her name again? Whiskey? Vodka? Brandy, that’s it. Poor girl, she doesn’t stand a chance of ever being taken seriously in the real world with a name like that.