Forever Bound (8 page)

He’d been standing in the background again, just watching as the cars pulled up to pick up the children. I had no idea why he did that every day, but he did.

It wasn’t something I was going to figure out now. Right now, I had to decide whether to go through with the crazy, naughty idea I couldn’t seem to shake.

I told myself I needed to think about it some more. I just wasn’t an impulsive person. I was a careful person. I didn’t make decisions without thinking them through enough.

I was reminding myself of all of this as I made my way back to my classroom. At least, it was supposed to be my classroom I was returning to.

Instead, I ended up standing in the doorway of Declan’s.

He was in there, bending over to pick up some books from the floor. His tight butt was very nicely displayed in that position.

I swallowed hard, feeling a deep rising of excitement and anxiety both. What was I doing here?

Was I really the kind of person who would do this?

He straightened up and must have realized I was there, since he turned around abruptly. “Hey,” he said, sounding both pleased and surprised. “Don’t just stand in the doorway. Come on in.”

I stepped in, trying to control my breathing and think of something—anything—to say.

“Did I do something wrong?” he asked. “I suppose Lily must have reported on me and you’re here to lecture me.” He didn’t sound annoyed, the way he had a couple of weeks ago when I’d come to see him to find out why he wasn’t teaching very well. From what Lily said, he actually seemed to have gotten a little better, so maybe he was learning.

None of that was on my mind right now, anyway. “No,” I managed to say. “I’m not here to yell at you.”

“Then why are you here?” Something had changed on his face, as if he’d seen something in mine. He stepped closer to me, his eyes lingering on my face, slipping down to my body before returning to meet my gaze again.

I swallowed hard. “I…”

He lifted a hand, like he would touch me, but then intentionally dropped it again. “You said your answer was no.”

“I know I did.” A hot excitement was shuddering through me, blurring my vision, roaring in my ears.

“Is your answer still no?” He eased a little closer until there was just a breath between us, but he still didn’t touch me.

I raised a hand and touched his chest. It felt like another person who was doing this thing. I could hardly believe it was me. “No. I changed my mind.”

He heard a quick intake of breath and felt his body tense. “You changed your mind about what, Kristin?” His voice was careful, and it felt like he was holding himself back.

I didn’t want him to hold back anymore. I wanted him to let go. “It has to just be a no-strings kind of thing. Just a fling. Nothing messy.”

“I’m all for no mess. Why did you change your mind?”

“I was only thinking relationship, and I can’t be in a relationship with you. But sex…” I took a shaky breath and smiled. “I can do that.”

He made a choked sound and cupped my face with his hand, and his eyes went all hot.

“Lily is with her grandparents this afternoon,” I added.

“Excellent timing.” He leaned forward, but before he kissed me, he dropped his hand again and straightened up. “We sure as hell can’t do this here.”

“I know. Where should we go?”

“We can go to my place. I’m not far,” he said, walking over to his desk to collect his stuff.

“Okay. Let me grab my bag, and I’ll follow you over there.”

And that was it. We were evidently doing this.

We were getting together for sex in the middle of the afternoon.

I’d never realized I was that kind of person before, and I was strangely excited that I was.

***

Declan had a suite at one of those extended-stay places. I thought it was a little strange. He might be new to town, but surely he’d want a more long-term living arrangement. The thought flickered through my mind as I parked next to him and then got out of my car, but after taking one look at his face, the idea disappeared completely.

He must be just as excited as I was, if his expression was anything to go by.

He took my hand and walked quickly into the building and then down the hallway to his door.

As soon as he’d unlocked it, he grabbed me and pulled me in, pressing me back against the wall as he kicked the door shut.

Before I could even open my mouth to say a word, he was kissing me.

His kiss was hot and urgent and hungry, and I was immediately overwhelmed by it. My mouth opened to his as he pushed his body against mine and slid one of his hands down to cup my bottom.

My blood was pulsing intensely as our tongues tangled and dueled, as I reached up to twine my arms around his neck.

“Damn, you’re gorgeous,” he murmured, breaking the kiss briefly to reposition our bodies slightly. He was still holding me trapped against the wall, and I had no complaints in the world. “I’ve been thinking about doing this since the day I met you.”

“Me too,” I admitted, gasping as he unbuttoned my dress enough to slide his hand inside to cup my breast over my bra.

I arched against the wall as he fondled me and then dragged his head down into another kiss.

As we kissed, I could feel a pressure of arousal growing inside me, until I was raising one leg to try to wrap it around his. This move was impeded by my skirt, and I groaned in frustration as the erotic urgency built inside me with no relief.

“Fuck,” he gasped, breaking the kiss to mouth a line of kisses down my throat. “I can’t remember the last time I was this turned on.”

I could feel it in his body that he meant it. The hard bulge of his erection was pushing into my belly, and I loved the feel of it—that I could turn this man on so much. “Me too,” I gasped, clawing at his shirt and trying once again to raise my leg.

This time, Declan bunched up my skirt enough for me to wrap my leg around him and moaned as the position let me rub myself against his thigh.

“Damn, you’re so hot.” His voice was rough and low. “I knew you’d be hot like this.”

“Please. I can’t wait much longer.” I didn’t know what had gotten into me. I was never out of control this way.

He stifled a moan and kissed me again. Then he kissed his way down to my breasts, making me cry out in pleasure as he nipped at one of my nipples. He didn’t spent too long on them, though. Instead, he ended up on his knees in front of me, pushing up my skirt.

I was panting desperately, staring down at this handsome, sexy man on knees before me. I knew what he was going to do, and I could barely hold myself upright as he kissed his way up one of my thighs toward my panties.

My arousal was hot and wet, and soon he’d slid my panties down to bare it to his sight.

“Spread your legs, baby,” he rasped, as his mouth reached my center. His breath was hot and it felt incredibly good.  Arousing.

I adjusted my stance to make more room for him, sprawled against the wall, trying to keep my knees from buckling as he parted my flesh with his fingers and then started to work me over with his lips and tongue.

It felt so good and I was so aroused I couldn’t keep quiet. I clung to his head, holding it in position as he pleasured me.

He knew what he was doing. His touch was skillful and urgent both. I was making silly sounds of pleasure as an orgasm grew inside me, and I couldn’t keep my hips from rocking, trying to feel even more.

I couldn’t believe this was me—against the wall in a strange room with Declan on his knees, between my legs. It was so unexpected—and so overwhelming—that it made the physical sensations even more powerful.

I was crying out loudly, fisting both hands in his hair and with one leg hooked over his shoulder as my climax finally broke. The sensations filled me, took all of me, until I was left breathless and limp in their wake.

I wouldn’t have been able to stay on my feet if Declan hadn’t unhooked my leg and then held me as he stood up. He was flushed and panting, just like I was, but he still looked like he was on the edge of losing it.

I was on the edge of falling into a sated heap on the floor. I gasped against his chest as both of his arms went around me. “Thank you,” I managed to say.

“You’re welcome.” He gave me a light kiss, and I could sense how much urgency he was now reining in.

I slid my hand down to the bulge at the front of his pants. “Now maybe we can do a little something for you.”

Declan

It’s safe to say that I was an arrogant son of a bitch most of the time. I took what I wanted, when I wanted it and I was good at what I did—no matter what it was. Some would call me selfish. Some would comment on how huge my ego is. I have enough confidence for three men.

But right now? I was as nervous as a virgin on prom night.

Kristin’s hand was stroking my arousal through my pants, and as much as I was enjoying it—hell, who am I kidding, I was loving it—I was…nervous.

I knew that she hadn’t been with anyone since her husband died, and I had a pretty good feeling that she hadn’t dated much—if at all—before she married him. That was a lot of pressure on me.

Normally, with the women I get involved with, I was not overly concerned about my performance. I’d been told more than enough times that I was good in bed, and I knew how to give a woman as many orgasms as she could stand. But Kristin? I was torn about what to do.

I didn’t want to be aggressive with her and scare her off. Even though I was about ready to burst from the touch of her hand—and she hadn’t even gotten to the skin-on-skin contact yet. I could go slow and gentle—but I didn’t know if I was capable of that right now. I’d wanted her for what seems like forever, and all I wanted was to get us both naked and be buried inside of her.

“You’re thinking awful hard over there,” she said as she leaned in and ran her tongue across my lips.

I was in deep trouble.

I wanted this to be good for her. I wanted this to be something that she wasn’t going to regret.

“I won’t break,” she whispered.

And all bets were off.

Quickly, I removed her hand from the front of my pants and pinned her arms above her head against the wall. I dove in and kissed her, devoured her. She whimpered against my mouth, and I swallowed the sound.

With one hand holding her in place, I let my other hand begin to roam her body.

And what a body it was.

She was soft and curvy and so fucking responsive to my touch that I was slowly going insane. Her dress was awkwardly bunched up and the only thought going through my brain was that I had to get it off her. I had to get her naked. I had to see if she was as soft all over as I had imagined.

In a flash, I released her arms and cupped her bottom. “Wrap your legs around me,” I growled and she immediately complied. I walked us over to the bed and laid her down. With her hair splayed out against the comforter and her dress a tangled mess around her middle, she was the sexiest thing I had ever seen.

I pulled my shirt off and tossed it to the floor and kicked off my shoes. “Take your dress off.”

Kristin’s eyes went wide for a moment and I cursed myself. Maybe I was pushing her too far, too fast. I was just about to apologize, to lean down and help her undress when she came to her feet in front of me. With those beautiful eyes never leaving mine, she unbuttoned, unbelted and shimmied out of her dress.

And my heart just about stopped.

She was perfect. Kristin Andrews was my every fantasy come to life. It was like having my own centerfold model right in front of me.

I was never going to be able to look at her in one of her prim teacher dresses the same way again.

Standing there in scraps of white lace, she was a dream. My hands were actually shaking as I slowly reached out to touch her. My fingers skimmed over her face, her throat, her shoulders, her breasts.

“Declan,” she sighed, and I replaced my hands with my mouth. I teased and suckled her through her bra until she was shaking and panting and trying to pull me down on the bed with her.

It would have been so easy to just follow her down, kick my pants off and give us what we both wanted, but I wanted to savor this. I wanted to make it right for her. I know that we said that this was just…casual…but right now it felt like a hell of a lot more.

Kristin pulled free of my arms and sat down on the edge of the bed and then scooted back until her head was on the pillows. She opened her arms to me, and I felt so fucking humbled that I couldn’t move for a minute. This beautiful, brave woman wanted me.

Me
.

My conscience was pulling at me to do the right thing—be careful with her—and if I couldn’t, to just walk away.

Fuck my conscience.

She licked her lips as her sensual gaze met mine, and I saw in those eyes that she wanted this just as badly as I had.

“You’re too far away,” she whispered.

Now. It had to be now. Without breaking eye contact, I pulled my wallet out of my back pocket and took a condom out. Kristin arched a brow at me, and I smiled wickedly at her. “It pays to be prepared.”

And then my pants, my socks, my boxer briefs were gone and I was slowly covering her body with mine. The skin on skin contact was intense—we both sighed at it—and then I was kissing her again as if my life depended on it.

She clung to me, her nails raked down my back and I was damn near shaking with anticipation. I was just about to raise my head to look at her when she wrapped her legs around my waist and it felt…perfect.

Somehow I managed to get that sexy-as-hell bra off of her and tossed it to the floor to join where I’d dropped her panties earlier. I pulled back long enough to roll the condom on, and I saw a wide-range of emotions cross her face—anticipation, desire…and uncertainty.

That one stopped me dead in my tracks. “It’s not too late to change your mind,” I said softly, even though my body wasn’t quite on board with that option.

She shook her head. “No. I want this. I want…you.”

And then I was slowly sinking into her, inch by inch. She sighed. She purred. She all but destroyed me. Her legs wrapped around me again, and I waited a minute for her to adjust to me. I kissed her gently on her lips, her eyes. “Tell me if I do something that you don’t like.”

Reaching up, she cupped my face in her hands. “I don’t like that you’re not moving.

It was like waving the checkered flag in my face. My hands found hers and pinned her arms above her head as I began to move. Slowly. “Like this?”

She shook her head.

I rocked a little harder into her, a little faster. “How about this?”

She shook her head again and seemed to be getting lost in the same sensations I was feeling.

“Tell me,” I urged, unable to stop myself from moving harder and faster.

“Like that,” she whispered. “Hard. I need it harder.”

I gave her exactly what she wanted—what we both wanted—and soon she was writhing beneath me, chanting my name. “Please!” she said. And then she was pulling her hands free of mind and pulling me closer as she came—hard. Her tight channel clenching around me and her body wrapped around me, it was like nothing I had ever felt before.

“I can’t hold back,” I said hoarsely. “I need…I need to…”

“Yes,” she cried. “Do it, Declan! Now!”

My orgasm hit me hard and fast—too fast for my liking. Over and over, my body shuddered and shook as it felt like everything I had emptied into Kristin.

Our breathing was heavy as I rested my forehead against hers. “I’m sorry,” I said when I was finally able to breathe.

“For what?”

“I wanted to go slow with you. I wanted this to last longer.” I raised my head and looked down into her eyes. “I wanted it to be perfect for you.”

I realized what I was saying and suddenly panicked. We said this was a fling—possibly only a one-time thing. Why was I getting so…I don’t know…emotional about it?

Kristin smiled slowly at me. “It was perfect. Exactly what I wanted.” She shifted slightly beneath me and I gathered her into my arms as I rolled off of her and tucked her into my side.

A million thoughts raced through my head—was she all right? Did she regret what we’d just done? Part of me wanted to know but the other part was afraid of her answer.

“You’re doing it again,” she said.

“What?”

“Thinking too hard.” She raised her head and looked at me, uncertainty written all over her face. “It’s…it’s been a long time for me. I’m sorry if I wasn’t…”

I placed a finger over her lips to immediately silence her. “There is nothing that you have to apologize to me for.” My hands skimmed her face. “You were better than my fantasies.”

Her eyes went wide. “Really?”

I nodded. “Really. And I’ve had some pretty vivid fantasies about you.”

She blushed. “I…I’ve thought about you too.”

In that moment, I felt like I was on top of the world. “Kristin…it’s not just,” I stopped, sort of faltered with my words, “I mean, I don’t just think of you like this.” Oh, God. She’s going to think I’m an idiot. “I like talking with you, spending time with you. Does that make sense?”

In my entire life, well, actually, since I began dating at the age of thirteen, I never talked—or felt—like this with a woman. This was more than physical, more than just sex, and I wanted—needed—her to know that.

Slowly, Kristin nodded. “I don’t think…”

I knew what was coming. Feared it. I placed a finger over her lips. “Don’t,” I said softly. “I don’t want you to make up any excuses for how you feel. It’s okay if you don’t feel the same way. I just wanted you to know…I wanted to be honest with you.”

“Declan,” she whispered as her eyes scanned my face, “being with you…like this or even just around school, it…it scares me a little.”

“I’m sorry if I came on too strong.”

“No, no, it’s not that,” she said and then chuckled. “Although you do get points for persistence.” She paused and her expression turned serious. “You bring out a side of me that I never knew existed. You’ve brought these…feelings out of me that I thought were gone.” Her hand reached out and skimmed down my chest, her eyes followed the progress before meeting mine again. “Sometimes, just thinking of you, makes me ache with need.”

And just like that I was hard again. “I know you don’t have a lot of time but…”

“It’s okay,” she interrupted. “I want you again too.”

We kissed, and I knew that this time we’d go slowly. We’d explore.

And I also knew that this one afternoon wasn’t going to be enough.

***

I was distracted to say the least on Monday when we were back at school. I had already known that we wouldn’t see each other over the weekend, but once I walked into the building Monday morning, all I could think about was seeing Kristin.

Totally out of character for me.

By all accounts and purposes, I should have been done. I had pursued, I had captured and I’d rocked both of our worlds. But for some reason, it wasn’t enough. I wanted more. I knew it Friday, but I thought once the sexual haze was over and Kristin left my hotel room, that I would get my head together and realize that it was just sex.

Just a fling.

My stomach sank when I realized it was more than that. Much, much more than that. Shit.

I lingered at the front office in hopes of running into her. I chatted with Rose and spent a few minutes with Chuck when Kristin finally walked in. She blushed furiously when she spotted me and wouldn’t look at me directly.

Uh-oh.

I excused myself and followed her when she walked out the door. “Hey,” I said, jogging to catch up with her. “How was your weekend?”

“Fine. It…it was fine.”

My eyes narrowed a little bit as I fell in step beside her. “That’s good. How’s Lily? Did she have fun with her grandparents?”

She nodded.

I quickly maneuvered so I was in front of her and she walked right into me. Her eyes were huge as she looked up at me. “What’s going on?” I asked.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean…” I looked around to make sure no one was near us. “You’re giving me the cold shoulder and I don’t know why.”

“You’re being ridiculous.”

“Am I?”

She rolled her eyes. “Look, it’s Monday, I’ve got a busy day. We have to start the kids rehearsing for the Christmas pageant, and I’ve got to focus on that.”

I might have believed her if she had looked at me while she spoke. I tucked a finger under her chin and forced her to look at me. “I just wanted to make sure that you were okay,” I said softly.

“I…I’m fine,” she said. “I’m just not comfortable…with this.”

“With what? Knowing that I’d like nothing more than to drag you into my classroom, lock the door and fuck you senseless up against the wall?” My words were whispered in her ear and she slowly relaxed against me.

She nodded. “I’d go willingly if I thought we wouldn’t get caught.”

I chuckled. “Now I’m not comfortable.” She looked up at me and I pulled her close—close enough so she could feel my erection against her belly. Her mouth formed a perfect “o” and I smiled. “God I want to kiss you right now.”

“We can’t.”

“I know.” That didn’t make it any better. “Promise me something?”

“What?”

“That yesterday wasn’t it. That it wasn’t a one-time thing?” Who the hell was I? Was I seriously asking her for more? Me? The guy who never was the one who looked for more than a woman was willing to give?