Forever Altered (21 page)

Just
when I’m finishing my third drink for the night, a bunch of people drop down at
the table I’m sitting at.  “Hey, Philly Girl.  How the hell have you
been?” Logan says.

“Hey! 
You guys are late.  You better hope Leah didn’t see you come in the door
just now,” I tease him, Shane, Troy, and Paige.

“It
was my fault,” Paige admits from the seat next to me.  “Although if these
bastards would have bothered with a costume, I may not have been the only one
running late.  Speaking of costumes, girlfriend, you are looking pretty
friggin
hot tonight.  You got a date or something?”

“Nope.
 This is all courtesy of you know who,” I tell her with a sarcastic smile.

“Leah,”
she laughs.

“Hmm,
I wonder how the hell you could have figured that out.  I totally should
have picked out my own costume.”  They all laugh at me.  “You are
looking pretty good yourself.  That’s what I should have been,” I say
winking at her.  She went with the normal devil costume.  Even though
it’s short, it is hiding everything that should be hidden. 

“I
thought the idea of Halloween is being something you aren’t every other day of
the year,” Shane jokes making me smile. 

“I’m
over missing you, Shane.  Now get out,” I say throwing a bug at him. 

“Hey,
don’t be throwing my decorations,” Leah says coming up behind me.  Of
course, I’d get caught.  She puts another drink in front of me after
looking in the cup in front of me.  “Thought that one may have been gone
already.  Come eat before all the good stuff is gone,” she instructs us.

“Go
ahead.  I’m not hungry, yet,” I tell her before starting on my drink.

“You
are going to pass out before you even make it to the dance floor,
Lyss
.  Let’s go eat something.”  She is pulling
on my arm.  It’s easier just to agree.

We
all hang out after eating for a bit.  It feels so good to have all of my
closest friends around me, even if someone is missing.  Laughing with them
really does make me feel better.  Well, there’s that and the large amount
of alcohol I’ve consumed.  A familiar song starts to play in the
background and Leah jumps up.

“Let’s
go.  That’s our song calling us,” she says as she downs the rest of her
drink before standing up. 

“There’s
like two people dancing, Leah.  I’m not going out there,” I say.

“Don’t
worry.  Once you two are out there in those costumes, the dance floor will
fill up real quick,” Paige announces pulling me along with her.  Erin and
Julia also come to dance bringing Mark and Tommy along with them.  I don’t
think those guys will leave their girlfriends alone for one second in those
school girl costumes. 

Dancing
with the girls to the one song turns into dancing to the next five songs. 
We are having so much fun that I don’t even see all the people who are now
dancing around us until I leave to take a break.  Paige comes with me
because she wants to make sure I am not gone long.  The guys have been
bringing us drinks, but my feet are starting to hurt in these shoes.  Our
view of the table has disappeared since Leah has us dancing right in front of
the DJ.  When we make our way through the other dancers, the first thing I
notice is someone sitting in my seat.  My anger takes control of me in an
instant as I walk up behind the intruder.

“Get
the fuck out of my seat.”  It didn’t even sound like my voice.

“I
didn’t see your name on it,” the blond tramp mouths back not turning around.

“My
name doesn’t need to be on it,” I spit out. 

She laughs
that overly sickening laugh she has.  “Tell her, Paige.  I don’t move
for anyone."  She flips her hair over her shoulder.

“You
better move for
her
, Carrie.  She’s not in the mood to tolerate
your bullshit tonight and, truthfully, neither am I,” Paige says standing
firmly beside me.  Shane and Logan are watching nervously.  Troy
stands up but doesn’t move.  He’s not sure what to do.

“Please,
you think I’m worried about the trashy girl who thought she deserved someone
like Rocco Matthews?”  She’s trying make me upset by mentioning his
name.  She has no idea who she is dealing with.

“Turns
out, Carrie,” I start to say leaning over her and placing my hand on the table
in front of her.  “He just might be your type after all. 
Insignificant and not worthy of my time.”  Somehow over the loud music, I
hear a huge gasp of air behind me.  I straighten up and turn around to see
Rocco standing there staring at me like I stabbed him.  I’m too drunk to
control the shit coming out of my mouth.  Even though I want to fall apart
over seeing him, my face never falters.  There is no way I will ever let
him know how he has destroyed me.  I turn back to Carrie and repeat for
the last time, “Now get the fuck out of my seat!”  She rises slowly out of
the chair glaring at me, then walks away giving Paige a wicked look for
fraternizing with the enemy.

The
tension is so thick at this table it’s ridiculous.  The guys are looking
from me to Rocco, then between themselves.  I plop down in my seat, put my
feet up on the one chair, and finish the drink in my hand.  “Paige, you
sitting or what?” I ask without turning around.  Rocco is still standing
there.  I can feel him staring at my back. 

“Um,
yeah.  Sure,” she stutters before pulling out the chair on my other
side.  “I don’t know what to do?  Do you want me to have Troy get him
out of here?” she whispers.  I just shake my head no.

“What
are you doing here, Rocco?  Thought you were staying home for the rest of
the weekend?” Shane asks from across the table.

“Sunshine,”
he calls me ignoring his friend.  My whole body tightens over hearing him
say my name, but I don’t turn around.  “Can I talk to you for a
second?  Please?”  Logan reaches over to refill my drink for
me.  I nod in appreciation.  When I still haven’t answered him, Rocco
asks again.  “Please come outside with me.  I won’t keep you long, I
promise.”

Hearing
him say the word ‘promise’ infuriates me.  I just about leap off the chair
and face him.  “I don’t think I can take another promise from you,
Rocco.  Paige, I don’t need a break after all.  I’ll be out there
with Leah.”  I storm passed him, drink in hand, never even checking to see
his reaction.  Screw him.

I
push through people a little too forcefully to get back to where I left
Leah.  “That was fast.  Feeling better?” she asks.

“Rocco’s
here,” I say.

“What
the fuck?  Want me to kick him out?”  I know she would do it in a
heartbeat, but I also know he would make a scene. 

“I
just want you to dance with me,” I tell her trying not to cry. 

“Whatever
you want,
Lyss
.”  She sends a look to Erin and
Julia.

A
few songs later, I feel the anger and disappointment start to fade.  My
mind pushes away thoughts of the jerk off who splintered my heart into sharp,
jagged pieces while the music consoles me.  I’ve long forgotten about the
revealing costume I’m wearing and dance without restraint.  The cool
breeze from the air conditioner they turned on for the party is lightly blowing
my hair.  This sense of happiness and freedom is only temporary.  The
next song that comes on is a slow song.  I start to back away to the edge
of the dance floor as my friends start to dance with their boyfriends.  A
bathroom break is just what I need.  When I turn in the direction of the
door, I almost run into the solid chest standing behind me.

“Dance
with me,” Rocco pleads.  I try to step around him, but he blocks my
way.  “Please, I need to hold you.” 

“Not
a chance in hell,” I tell him making another attempt to leave the room. 
Again he steps with me and reaches out to grab my arm.  What did he
say?  He needs to hold me?

“Sunshine,
you aren’t getting away without talking to me at some point,” he’s starting to
get mad.  Guess he’s not used to being told no.

“Stop
calling me that and let go of my arm,” I say trying to pull my arm back. 

“No. 
That’s your name.  I’m not letting go of anything.”  He’s barely
containing his temper.  “Where’s your necklace?” he asks looking at my
neck.

“It’s
in the box, ready to be returned to you.”

“It’s
yours.  You aren’t returning shit,” he raises his voice. 

“Rocco,
let me go,” I repeat.  Another hand rips his hand off of my arm.  I
didn’t know anyone was aware of us.

“Walk
away, Rocco,” Shane warns.  He is glaring at Rocco and has stepped in
between us.  “Don’t do this here and not when you both are drunk.”

“This
has nothing to do with you, Shane.  Get out of my way before I
move
you!” Rocco yells. 

“Back
off,” Shane counters standing firm.  It doesn’t look like either of them
are going to back down. 

“Shane,
if this has anything to do with you wanting my girl, I will…”  I’ve never
seen Rocco so mad.

“The
only thing happening here is me trying to stop my best friend from making the
second biggest mistake of his life.  You made the decision to end
it.  You let her go.  Now you have to leave her alone,” Shane explains
as calmly as he can. 

By
this time, all of my friends have stopped dancing and are now crowded around
me.  Leah and Paige have planted themselves on either side of me. 
The guys are trying to stand in front of me, but there isn’t much room between
me and Shane. 

“Stop
making a scene, Rocco,” Shane says turning his back on him.  A new slow
song has begun.  He sees the tears in my eyes that are just seconds from
escaping.  “Come dance with me,” Shane whispers pulling me away from whom
my heart is screaming for. 

Our
friends follow behind us, filling the gap between where Shane and I are dancing
and where Rocco stands glaring.  Shane has his back to Rocco, so he cannot
see me.  I lay my head on his chest and he puts one hand around my waist
and the other on the back of my head holding me to him.  I’m extremely
grateful he is comforting me, but his arms just feel completely wrong wrapped
around me.  It shouldn’t be Shane holding me.  I’m no longer able to
contain the tears that are building up.  Shane knows I’m crying and he
tries to reassure me that everything will be fine.  The sobbing gets worse
because I know nothing will ever be fine again. 

The
song comes to a close and the girls swoop in to steal me from Shane.  They
whisk me off to the bathroom.  Bright lights reveal my blood shot eyes and
smeared makeup.  Paige wets a paper towel and hands it to me.  I
clean it up as much as possible.  Leah has her bag she carries everywhere
for situations just like this and fixes my makeup in seconds.  Erin pulls
out her eye drops and passes them over to me.  I actually look presentable
again. 

“Thanks
girls,” I tell them. 

“Do
you want to go home?” Julia asks getting a look from Leah.  “Knock it off,
Leah.  She’s had a rough night.”

“I’m
okay,” I try to reassure her. 

“She
cannot keep running from him, Julia.  He’s going to be around,” Leah
snaps.

“She’s
clearly not okay.  You are just too blind to see it because you’re being
selfish,” Julia snaps back just as hard.

“Stop
it.  Both of you,” I sigh.  “Thank you for helping me.  You guys
can head back.  I’ll be there in a minute.”

“You
sure?” Paige asks not knowing if she should stay or go.

“I’m
sure.  Just need to regroup.”  She acknowledges me with a small nod
and they all leave the bathroom one by one. 

For
the next fifteen minutes, I try to convince myself to go back into the same
room as Rocco.  The only reason I think the rest of the night will be
uneventful is Leah probably went in there and either threatened Rocco or kicked
him out.  One last deep breath and I leave the security of the
bathroom.  The moment I step into the hallway, I’m wishing I was still
safely inside.  Standing against the wall next to the bathroom door is yet
another obstacle to face.  How much bullshit can a girl take in one night?

“There
she is.  I thought maybe you would hide in there all night,” the bastard
says pushing himself off of the wall. 

“Go
away, Ryan.” 

“Would
you look at that?  She does know my name.  At least you’ll be
screaming the right one when I get you back to my room.”  The look in his
eye has me starting to worry.  He looks drunk, but I can’t tell. 
There is only one way to get out of here and he’s blocking it.  Behind me
is a dead end.  I doubt going back in the bathroom would save me.

“I’m
not going anywhere near your room,” I make absolutely clear. 

“Why
not?  You think you’re too good for me?”  He looks offended. 

“No. 
I don’t go around randomly screwing people.  I’m not one of the sorority
wenches you hang out with.”

“Ryan,”
a voice says from behind him.  “Why don’t you go back to the party?” 
Shane and Logan are walking toward us. 

Ryan
stops advancing to me and turns around.  “I’m just chatting with a pretty
girl.”