Flawlessly Broken: (Broken Series Book 2) (26 page)

I snatched a grape from his fingers just before it made it to his mouth, chomping on it playfully. “You put quite a few miles on it anyway, traipsing back and forth to be with me.”

“Men, don’t traipse, sweetheart. We ramble, we cruise, and once in a while we may even gallivant, but we never traipse.” He smirked at me over the rim of his cup. “And every mile accumulated while on my way to you is worth it. Every single one.”

We sat in silence for a moment, Spencer trying to decide on a course of action and me trying to steel myself for the inevitable. He would have to go back to Richmond to handle all of this, maybe as soon as today, and I wasn’t ready to let him go. I’d thought I had the rest of the weekend with him, at least.

Regardless of what I’d wanted, I wasn’t about to add to his stress by acting disappointed. It wasn’t fair to him. We’d known before we started this that distance was a problem, so I would smile my brightest smile and send him off without guilt. It was the right thing to do. And it hurt like hell to even think about it.

I never would have thought I’d feel so attached to someone. Not just because it was so soon, barely a couple of weeks, but because I’d been determined to never feel this way again.

He watched me watching him, a soft smile playing on his lips. “What were you thinking just now? You’re expression kept changing like one of those holographic cards where the picture slowly morphed from one thing to another and back again. It was kind of cute, to be honest.”

I shook my head absently, returning his smile. “I honestly don’t know how to answer that question. So much is going on right now, I guess it was a combination of things. Rapid-fire thoughts is a good way to describe it.”

“Hmm... I must have had the same expression because I feel the same damn way right now. What do you say we go back to the apartment and see what we can do to shut down the worry factory for a while?” He waggled his brows and downed the last of his coffee.

I tossed the bar towel into the empty sink and headed around the bar. “Best idea I’ve heard all day.”

He followed behind me all the way to the door, grabbing my ass and making me squeal. For the time being, at least, we weren’t going to talk about him leaving.

And I was perfectly fine with that.

WE LAY IN
bed sometime later, lazily snuggled together and listening to the radio we’d left playing in the living room. It was a slow, sweet song, one that made you want to drift off to sleep. I was tempted to do just that, lulled by the sound of Spencer’s breathing and his heartbeat thrumming in my ear as I lay on his chest.

Spencer was wide awake, though. He reached up and brushed my hair down with his fingers, having gotten it caught in his beard once again. “Sweetheart, you awake?”

“Hmm?” I didn’t want to talk, didn’t want to move.

I could hear the smile in his voice. “Barely. Got it. Well, much as I’d love to lie here with you all night, I think we need to discuss what I’ve decided about the situation back home.”

I sat up on one elbow, wincing at my sore muscles and at the same time wishing for more. “Okay. What have you come up with?”

“I think I need to head back either late tonight or early in the morning to spend some time at the office ironing things out. I can’t leave it all up to Brant, but at the same time, the idea of leaving you here with your piece of shit ex makes my skin crawl. I don’t trust that guy, not for a second. So, I’m not sure where that leaves me.”

I thought about that for a minute while I peppered his chest with soft kisses, unable to make myself stop. After a while, he touched my cheek and I looked up to meet his eye.

“Sweetheart, tell me what you want me to do. If you’re worried about Derek, I’ll stay. I’ll find some way to push back any decisions at CBD until next week.” I started to shake my head but he gripped my chin. “I need you to be honest with me, here. I know you hate asking for help, but now isn’t the time to act unaffected if you’re afraid. Understand?”

Looking into his eyes right then, I knew.

His saying he loved me earlier had been unintentional but there was no doubt in my mind that it was true. I’d spent the better part of the day wondering how I felt about that. I knew I was falling for him, so it should have been a good thing to find out he felt the same way.

But it wasn’t.

Loving him was a stupid risk that I swore I’d never take again but I’d convinced myself that it was okay because it was one sided, which meant it would never go anywhere. No harm done to anyone except me. I could have lived with that.

When this was just us having fun, our differences hadn’t been a big deal but once
he
threw the L word into the situation, it was a whole new ballgame.

One I knew we’d both lose.

Because the one thing he wanted most was the one thing I would never be able to give him and I couldn’t deprive him of the future he deserved. He deserved a family, children of his own just like he’d always wanted.

But I wouldn’t be the one to give him that.

I refused to replace my daughter, and having another child would be doing just that. I couldn’t disrespect her memory that way. Not even for him.

He was right when he said that not everything we desire is meant for us and as much as I wanted him to stay, I knew it was time to start letting go. For both our sakes. So I smiled at him reassuringly and lied for all I was worth.

The next morning, he went home, and I began trying to figure out a way to end things before he had a chance to make it back.

I missed him before he even made it out the door.

Spencer

I NEARLY TURNED
the car around about a dozen times. When I’d said goodbye to Talia early this morning, there had been something in her eyes…something I couldn’t put my finger on, but gave me a bad feeling. I’d hated to leave her but I had little choice and she’d been adamant that she would be okay.

Before I even realized it, I was at the office. The drive back was a blur of worry and frustration. And longing. I wanted to go back and watch over her. I had a bad feeling about what would happen when Derek found out I was gone. If that little prick so much as put a toe over the line I drew for him, I would string him up by his balls—assuming he had any, of course.

If only Clay could see me now. He thinks I am the docile, mild-mannered one. And I suppose I usually am, but fuck with what’s mine and the last thing I will be is docile. Clay never saw that side of me with Ivey. Despite feeling something for her in the beginning, I never felt this pull, the need to protect and devour, that I felt with Talia. Every time I saw her sitting there with Derek, I wanted to growl.

Mine.

I had no idea where it came from but that was what I heard in my mind every time I looked at her.

I also had no idea how it would work between us, the distance alone was problem enough but I knew it wouldn’t be the only issue. Would she even want to try? Goddamn, I hoped so.

I made my way into the empty office and headed straight to my computer. Time to focus on work so I could be free to focus on something that was fast becoming more important.

Talia.

MY CELL RANG
in my pocket as Brant strolled in and took a seat on the other side of my desk, not as jovial as he’d been the last time he’d sat there.

I pulled out my phone and absently swiped at the screen to answer. Clay.

“Hey, I was just going to set up a conference call. Why are you calling my cell?” I frowned at my computer screen, trying to focus.

“Shit, you’re already back in Richmond?” Clay sounded like his day was going about as well as mine.

“Of course I’m at the office, we discussed this yesterday afternoon, did we not?” I turned to Brant, who shrugged. The cell was slowing my progress so I turned it to speaker and laid it on the desk. “Say hi to Brant.”

Clay blew out a frustrated breath. “Yo,” he said by way of greeting, not interested in pleasantries. “I thought you said you’d be back Monday. Didn’t you get the email about a meeting with the investors Saturday in D.C.?”

What?

“Uh, no. No email and no time to worry about the wedding gift when we have no work for our crews and office staff. Priorities, fucker.” I was so not in the mood. As much as I wanted to be in D.C., I’d put the company first... and he was going to do the same, dammit.

Brant sat stoically with one brow raised and absolutely no input. Oh,
now
the fucker wants to clam up... the last two weeks it’s been yack, yack, yack and now…silence.

After an exasperated sigh, Clay tried another tack. “Okay, look, we have several jobs lined up on the other side of this, right? And we were considering the timetable for Ali’s present to be out of reach, right? Well, if you ask me, this couldn’t have worked out better. We have the time we need to make this thing for Ali a reality sooner rather than later.”

“And what about in the interim? You gonna pay the crews and office staff to stay home for the next few weeks?” I prodded.

“No, smartass. The crews can be reassigned for a few weeks, as we discussed, and the office can run as usual. There are always calls coming in and scheduling to be done for upcoming jobs. Let them do their thing. They can read, knit, watch TV, whatever they usually do when we’re out of town, as long as the clients can get in contact. Hell, they can all take a long, paid vacation and leave the phones to the answering service, if they want. Totally up to them. Then either you or Brant can take meetings as needed on specific days of the week, leaving the rest open for Ali’s surprise.”

Brant blinked at me, clearly not sure what to say to that. I knew the feeling. Clay must have really been focused on getting everything in order for Ali before the wedding. He’d just acted like he was running the show for the first time in ages.

Love makes you do all sorts of crazy things, I guess.

“Okay, I can work with Brant on finding openings for the crews today, hopefully that won’t be a big deal. There have been offers before that we turned down because of time constraints.”

Brant snorted. “Well, shit’s wide open now.”

Clay chuckled softly. “Brant, since Spencer has been running back and forth so much, what do you think about taking the meeting in D.C. on Saturday?”

“No!” Shit. I said that louder than I meant to.

Brant sat back in his seat, watching me with a furrowed brow.

“Why the hell not, Spence?” Clay asked, the hiss in the line echoing around the room. “Don’t you think he can handle it?”

“It’s not that. I’ve just built a rapport with these investors and I already have a handle on the situation.”

“But you didn’t even know about the meeting until five minutes ago. What’s the deal?” Clay wasn’t stupid, I had to tell him something. Not the truth, of course, but something.

I ran a hand over my beard, thinking I needed to trim it again. “Okay, I’ve been seeing someone who lives near there and I wanted to go back to spend time with her. The meeting was as good an excuse as any.”

“You what?” Clay’s voice rose an octave and Brant’s mouth was curled into a knowing smile.