Finding Solace (69 page)

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Authors: Barbara Speak

BOOK: Finding Solace
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"I'm
still there. Like I said, I'm working on it. I just can’t make it go away
overnight.” He looked down at the ground and then back up to make eye contact
with me, “The girl I am dating really is pretty cool."

 
"That's
awesome. What is her name?"

 
"Sabrina."

 
"Colt,
I want you to open your eyes with this girl. See everything she has to offer
you. Don't compare her to past relationships. Let her, be her. And promise me
you won't think for her and tell her it’s what's best for her. Let her make her
own choices. Learn from us and don’t repeat it. You will be just fine. She’s
lucky to have you."

 
"Thank
you for always being you. You still mean the world to me, beautiful."

 
"You
will always mean a lot to me too. Now, I need to get back inside. I am part of
this wedding, you know. Come on."

 
"No,
thank you. I think I'm just
gonna
get out of here. I
got to see everybody I wanted to see. I actually have a girl back home that I
might have a chance at spending some time with tonight, if I hurry."

 
I smiled at
him and said, "Then what are you waiting for? Get going."

 
"Take
care, Sadie.”

 
"You too, Colt."

 
He walked to
his car and I turned and walked back inside. I thought to
myself
,
‘That was easier than I thought. He's going to be okay and so am
I.

 
I found Ash
in his chair and pulled him up and out on to the dance floor. He looked worried
for all of two seconds until he saw my face. I was happier than I have felt in
a long time. I kissed him hard, and then pulled back to end it softly.

 
"You
are all I will ever want, Asher Williams. Now, will you dance with your
ginormous wife?"

 
"It
would be my pleasure."

 
Everybody
else was already out there, dancing their drunken asses off. Ash was feeling
pretty good himself and started cutting his Chris Brown moves. I couldn’t do a
quarter of what I used to be able to do, but I still tried my best.

 
Heather and
Jason were going to Tahiti on their honeymoon and leaving in the morning.
Everyone was saying their goodbyes and leaving. Not our friends. They closed
the place down, as usual, with Ash and me right there in the mix. It felt like
old times, and I was in heaven. When last call was announced and the DJ turned
off the music, we had no choice but to call it a night. I was exhausted by that
time. The babies never moved much for people to feel them, but I just explained
that I probably was rocking them to sleep all night from dancing.

 
Everyone was
leaving early in the morning, except for us locals. Mike, Tony, Kate, Marissa,
Ash and I decided to go to Denny's for breakfast after everyone said their
goodbyes. They all wished Ash and I luck with the delivery and I promised to
post pictures on Facebook for them to see. I kissed Heather and told her she
made the most beautiful bride I had ever laid my eyes on. Ash and I wished them
a good time on their honeymoon and then we all separated.

 
Denny's
tasted so good. The grease settled in just fine for me. All the other's said it
was disgusting. Ash couldn’t believe I ate everything on my plate and then his
bacon too. Marissa stayed kind of quiet, compared to her normal outgoing self.
I watched her and the whole time she was focused on Mike. He never gave her a
second look. With him being who he is, it explained a lot about her crush. It
also explained why he would view her as just another eighteen year old girl.
Once again, Tony and Kate were talking away. I thought I picked up some
flirting from Tony which completely shocked me. It was the same stuff he used
to throw at me back in the day. Ash started to yawn and said he was ready for
bed. Here I am, two months from giving birth and my husband is ready for bed
before me. What is this world coming to?

 
I drove us
home and this time it was Ash who was asleep when we got there. It was
physically impossible for me to carry him, so I just shook him constantly. When
he refused to move, I laid on the horn. I was sure my neighbors didn’t like me
at that moment, but tough shit. How else was I going to get him out of the car?
He wouldn’t budge. So, I left him. Yep, I left him in the car. I sure as hell
was not staying in there with him. I went upstairs and got ready for bed. I
tried to fall asleep, but knowing he was out there kept me from being able to.
I walked back downstairs and grabbed a pitcher. I filled it with ice water and
walked back out to the car. After I tried again and he wouldn’t wake up, I
poured the pitcher over his head. He jumped up screaming. I couldn’t help but
laugh. And I didn’t laugh a little, I laughed until I literally peed my pants.
Then I wasn’t laughing anymore. Now Ash was laughing at me.

 
"This
isn't funny, Ash."

 
"It
absolutely is, princess. You are beginning to have a serious problem with
that."

 
"The
babies are right on my bladder. That's not my fault."

 
"Your
right, I'm sorry. Let’s get you inside and clean you up."

 
Needless to
say I had to shower, but Ash was in there, washing my hair and body for me.
Sure enough, the babies picked that time to wake up. It looked like aliens were
trying to escape out of my belly. Ash and I
laid
in
bed, watching the babies play until we all fell asleep.

 

 

CHAPTER
54

 
Ash
rolled over and tapped me on the nose. I peeked at him out of the corner of my
eye.

 
"Good
morning, princess."

 
"Good morning to you, too."

 
I said it
with an obvious smirk on my face, leading Ash to ask, "What are you up
to?"

 
"It’s a
surprise."

 
This time he
rolled over and attempted to get on top of me. Ha, fat chance!

 
"This
isn't as easy as it used to be."

 
"No
shit, babe. I have two weeks left and believe me, it’s no cake walk."

 
"I know
and I feel so bad for you. You have to be miserable. But Sadie, you have done
all of this with a smile on your face and I have never been so proud of you.
They have to come soon. The doctors said thirty six weeks. We are at thirty
eight."

 
"You
don't have to tell me all this, Ash. I feel it every day that ends with no
delivery. As far as smiling, I am bringing two people into the world. It's a
miracle that a body can even do this. Of course I’m grateful. It doesn't mean
that I am enjoying it anymore. I want to be done."

 
"I know.
Dr. Weiss told you it would get really hard. Do you want me to make up some
breakfast? I could make bacon and eggs?"

 
I grazed his
face with the back of my hand. I loved this man. He graduates in four hours and
all he was worried about is me.

 
"I will
get up and make breakfast. What would you like to have ‘Mr. I am an official
fire fighter’ today?"

 
His face lit
up. He had every right to feel happy and proud. He was graduating top of his
class.

 
"It is
pretty cool to hear that."

 
"I bet
it is. I'm so proud of you. All of your hard work paid off."

 
"Yes,
it did. So, what's my surprise?"

 
"The
whole point of a surprise is to be surprised. You’re getting nothing out of me.
Now you have to get off me, so I can go pee."

 
"I’m
off."

 
He hopped
off me and helped me out of bed. I went straight to the bathroom, did the deed
and jumped in the shower to get ready. When I felt as pretty as I could, under
the circumstances, I went downstairs and found Ash setting the table with the
breakfast he offered. Best man ever!

 
"You
define radiant. Do you know that?"

 
"Thank
you, honey, I know your full of shit, but you get an A for effort. On the other
hand, didn't I tell you I would do this?"

 
"And I
have told you time and time again, I like taking care of you. Let me."

 
There was no
point to this argument. He would never give on this one. So I sat down and let
him serve me. Who would have ever thought I would be here, having all that I
have? Not me.

 
After we
ate, Ash had to get ready to leave. He was supposed to be there two hours early
for rehearsal. I couldn’t have been more grateful for that fact. The planner
and I had been in the works for weeks, preparing for his graduation party and
the day was finally here. I kissed him goodbye and told him and I would be
there front row and center.

 
About twenty
minutes later, the planner showed up. We went over all the details again. I
showed her where I wanted everything set up and what time I wanted it ready by.
Stuff she already knew, but I was nervous planning something so big and wanting
it to be just perfect.

 
I left with
thirty minutes to spare and went to watch my husband graduate. I knew I was
going to be the proudest wife there was.

 
When I got
to the event, I found Ash's family standing outside. Maria took one look at me
and said, "Oh my, you poor dear. Let’s go find you a seat. You look
miserable."

 
What a nice
thing to say. ‘How do you think a person thirty eight weeks into a pregnancy
carrying twins should look?’ is what I wanted to respond with.

 
"That
would be great." Is what
came
out of my mouth
instead.

 
As we walked
inside I asked, "Have you seen my mom and dad yet?"

 
"Not
yet, but I’ll go wait outside for them." Ash's dad offered.

 
"Thank
you, Michael."

 
"I think
you look adorable, Sadie, that dress is so chic'. I would wear it if it came in
non- maternity. And don't listen to my mother, you look beautiful."

 
"Kate,
I love you so much. That was very sweet to say. I really like this dress
too."

 
"It’s
the truth. I hope I get lucky enough to look that good whenever I have a
baby."

 
"You
have got to find a man first. Got one in mind?"

 
"Maybe."

 
I spun in my
chair, "Who?"

 
"Nobody
you know."

 
"Really, because you and Tony were looking mighty chummy at
the reception?"

 
Her face was
priceless. She looked shocked I called her out and at the fact that I caught
on. What caught me off
guard,
was her response.

 
"He is
a great guy, but not really my type.”

 
"Girl,
your type isn't always the best. I mean no offense by that. They start out
good. I can see why you would date them, but then they all seem to turn into
assholes."

 
"True
statement, but this one seems different. He isn't anything like what I would
normally go for."

 
"Well
then, I wish you luck. I don't get a name or anything?"

 
"Let’s
just see how it goes. If all is good, I will. I promise."

 
"I'm
going to hold you to that one."

 
Out of the
corner of my eye, I saw my father in law walking back in with my mom and dad
following him. My mom's face lit up when she saw me, as it always does lately.

 
"I
don't think there could be a prettier pregnant person on the planet. Sadie
girl, you take my breath away."

 
"I
agree with your mother. It looks really good on you. Too bad it can only last
such a short time." My dad was crazy if he thought this was a short time.
I had been pregnant forever. I loved my parents so much. How I ever fell into
such a dysfunctional relationship in high school, with role models like I have,
is beyond me.

 
"Thank
you guys so much. But I'm ready for this joy ride to come to an end."

 
Maria leaned
forward to join the conversation and asked, "Do you have any names decided
yet?"

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