Finding Solace (60 page)

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Authors: Barbara Speak

BOOK: Finding Solace
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I never seen it, but I found this
love, I'm
gonna
feed it.

 
You better believe I'm
gonna
treat it.

 
Better than anything I've ever had.

 
'Cause
your
so damn
beautiful.

 
He was
getting up from his chair and walking toward me as I sang.

 
Everything
is like a white out.

 
'Cause we shook-a-shook a shine down.

 
Even when the, when the lights out, but I can
see you glow.

 
Got my head up in the rafters, got my happy
ever after.

 
Never felt this way before,
ain't
felt this way before
.

 
Ash
was standing right in front of me wearing a smile I had never seen on him. It
was hard to sing with the one I was wearing to match but I finished, looking
into his eyes.

 
I swear you hit me like a vision.

 
I, I, I wasn't expecting.
  
              

 
But who am I to tell fate.

 
Where
its suppose
to
go.

 
When
the last of the lyrics were sung, I jumped into Ash’s arms as he spun me
around.

 
"God, I
love you, girl. You get more amazing every day. That was incredible. Thank
you."

 
"You’re
so welcome. I love you too, so much."

 
He kissed
me. Not a kiss I would normally like in a bar full of people watching, but at
this point I didn't care. I loved this man with everything in me. "Best
surprise ever. And I will never give you shit about that voice again."

 
"Really?
No more need to scream your name?"

 
"Oh
that day will never come, sweetheart. You are going to scream this man's name
until the day you die."

 
He continued
to point to himself while he said it.

 
"If you’re lucky."

 
I started to
walk back to the group when he slapped my ass hard.

 
"Don't
you ever walk away from me, woman, although I do really like the view."

 
I called
back over my shoulder, "Then don't damage the goods, mister." I shook
it back and forth for good measure.

 
"I am
in love with that ass is what I am. Keep shaking it like that and I will be
pulling you into that bathroom."

 
I shook it
until I reached the table of my friends.

 
"That
was amazing, Sadie! I have never heard you sing like that."

 
"Thank
you, Lindsey. That means a lot."

 
"I'm
proud of you for singing something that makes us smile instead of cry. That was
amazing, girly." Tony was always one to bring reality to the table.

 
"Thank
you, I think"

 
"Come
over here, Sadie."

 
I walked
over between Mike and Tony and crouched down.

 
"What's up, Mike?"

 
It was Mike
who told me to come over there but Tony who held my eye on the journey.

 
"If Ash
is what gets you to do something like that, while wearing a smile like the one
you had, then I have more respect for that man than anyone. I have never seen
you so happy."

 
I grabbed
Mike into a tight hug. It meant so much coming from him. He has always been in
favor of Colt and me. He is the one that brought us together to begin with, for
goodness sakes. I didn’t want to let him go, I was hugging him so tight.
Eventually Ash cleared his throat and I pulled back to see what it was for.

 
"Feeling
a little left out over here."

 
Jason got up
and sat on Ash's lap.

 
"Is
this better?"

 
Everyone
busted up laughing while Ash pushed Jason off of him.

 
"You
see that? Your man just turned down my brother."

 
"Tony,
if he hadn't I would be worried."

 
I walked
over and took his lap myself.

 
"Were
you getting a little jealous there, baby?"

 
"Nope, just lonely.
You’re not Mike's type
anyway."

 
I slapped
him hard in the arm.

 
"That's
not true. He would totally be with me, wouldn't you, Mike?"

 
"Wouldn't
I, what?"

 
"Be
with me?"

 
"Ok,
this is beyond awkward, Sadie. Your boyfriend is sitting under you,
remember?"

 
"Lindsey,
Sadie has always wanted to bang all the brothers. Too bad she will only go down
having one of them. I would kill Jason if he even looked at her wrong."

 
At that moment
I wanted to shoot Heather between the eyes. Ash went tense under me. I didn’t
know how to handle this. Luckily, the waitress dropped off a tray of shots
right at that moment. I reached forward and grabbed two. Ash grabbed one of
them from me and said, "I think I need this more than you." So I
handed him the other one as well. He took it and back it went. When he came
forward again, he grabbed me and kissed me. I was in pure shock. Never did I
think that was coming. When he pulled back he simply said, "We all have a
past, right?"

 
My eyes
bugged out of my head. This can't go away that easily. But you must be crazy if
you think I was going to bring it back up. I kissed him and then grabbed one
for myself. I got up and pulled him out on the dance floor. I was officially
drunk and by the way Ash was walking, he was feeling mighty fine too. We were
almost on the dance floor when he took a wrong turn. He walked straight toward
the karaoke guy. I screamed over the music so he could hear me that I didn’t
want to sing another song. He ignored me and told the guy something and then
walked back to me. He took me by the hand and led me to the dance floor, where
he spun me around and then dipped me successfully without dropping me this
time. Even knowing he had the last time he attempted it, I still left my body
in his hands. I trusted him without a doubt. I know Ash loves me completely, even
my faults. That, in itself, is incredible. He pulled me to him and started slow
dancing with me to "I will survive" by Gloria Gaynor and that chick
singing karaoke was destroying it. He held my hands and looked in my eyes and
slurred, "Whatever I do, promise me you won't run."

 
"I
promise."

 
"You
always told me you would never lie about promising."

 
"You
also promised not to hurt me, so I should never need to run."

 
The song
came to an end and then karaoke guy said, "Ash, it’s your turn. Get on up
here." No way!

 
"You’re
going to sing? You are
more drunk
than I
thought."

 
"Yes, I
am. Just promise no matter how bad I suck you won't run."

 
"Oh, I
promise. I have got to see this."

 
Ash walked
up to the guy and took the microphone. He brought it to his mouth and said, "This
is for my girl."

 
Hearing him
talk through the microphone only intensified just how drunk he was. He would
surely hate this whole thing tomorrow. Tonight though, he looked proud to be up
there. When the music started his body began to sway to the beat.

 
When a man loves a woman.

 
Can't keep his mind on
nothing else.

 
He'd trade the world.

 
For the good thing he's found.

 
If she is bad he can't see it.

 
She can do no wrong.

 
And turn his back on his best friend if he
puts her down.

 
When a man loves a woman.

 
Spend his very last dime.
                  

 
And trying to hold on to what he needs.

 
He'd give up all his comforts.

 
And sleep out in the rain.

 
If she said that's the way, it ought to be.

 
When a man loves a woman.

 
I give you everything I've got.

 
Trying to hold on to your
precious love.

 
And baby,
baby please don't
treat me bad.

 
Ash
was belting out Michael Bolton’s "When a man loves a woman" like
nothing I have ever heard. I was shocked straight to my core that my man could
sing the way he does. Tears were running down my face. I tried to keep up with
them and wipe them away, but I couldn’t. He had truly blown me clean away. How
is it I had no idea he could sing like that, and for him to pick this song?
Okay, I guess now is a good time to be honest. He sounded like a chicken being
choked to death, but he was still my choked chicken. I waited for him to finish
and then I jumped on him, not even giving him a chance to catch his balance. We
both fell to the floor, but the impact meant nothing to me. I locked my lips
with his and kissed him like there was going to be no tomorrow. The crowd was
chanting and clapping. We didn’t stop. Eventually we came back to earth and
stood back up. Ash took a bow and then led me back out on the dance floor.

 
"Thank
you for not running away.” He was shaking from nerves.

 
"That
was beautiful. Why would I ever run from that?"

 
"You
would be running from a man that wanted to sing to you but can't carry a note.
I hope I didn't embarrass you."

 
"Let me
clear this up for you. Singing to me is never going to get me to run away. That
was story book worthy. I'm yours. But baby?"

 
"Yes."

 
"I need
to go clean up my face and use the bathroom."

 
"Shit."

 
"What's
wrong?"

 
"That
means I have no barrier anymore from the guys and their asshole comments."

 
"You
did that for me, not them. You just tell them to kiss your ass, because I loved
it."

 
I walked
into the bathroom and cleaned up after I went potty. When I opened the door,
Ash was standing right there.

 
"What
are you doing?"

 
"Waiting for you."

 
"You
never went over there, did you?"

 
"Nope,
now run interference."

 
"You’re
just being a wimp. They aren’t going to say anything."

 
I walked
back over with Ash behind me.

 
"Ash, dude.
You fucking suck."

 
"Don't
say that about him! He was amazing!"

 
"I
meant because he just managed to cock block me for the rest of the night. No
girl is going to even care about who I am, when lover boy over here will sing
them a song."

 
"Well,
you can tell any one of those chicks, the only person I sing for, is my girl.
And, it worked for me. I have mad skills, dude. Don't hate."

 
Mike had no
choice but to laugh. It was funny. Everyone else told him he did great. Ash
hated every second of attention over it. I could not believe drunken Ash liked
to sing. Lindsey kept trying to get Kaleb to sing next, but he told her hell
would freeze over first. Heather gave me the eye. I knew Ash had just bumped
himself up another notch in her eyes. I sat back and just listened to everyone
talk with a huge smile on my face. This is what life is all about. Being in
love and surrounded by great friends. I glanced at each and every one of them,
laughing and having fun. Then my eyes found Tony. His eyes locked with mine and
with one simple nod of his head, I knew he was happy for me too.

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