Finding Jaime (7 page)

“Jaime, do have a minute?” Sam asks from the doorway, and I nod. “I just wanted to ask if you had any chance to look over the Robinson report. Charlie’s asked if there's any chance he could have it earlier than Friday.

I reach into the drawer next to me and pull out a yellow file. “Here.”

He flicks it open and scans the pages. “It’s done?”

“Yeah, I finished it this morning,” I reply. It was the first thing I did when I got in.

“Well, that’s great,” he grins. “Thanks.” He turns to leave.

“Hey, Sam?” He pauses and turns back. “We should cut down on the printing of these reports. It’ll save the company at least ten percent on the admin budget by cutting down on paper and ink, also the energy to do it.”

His eyebrows pinch together, and he cocks his head to the side. “You’ve researched that?”

“Yeah.” I shrug.
Go productive me!

He just stands there with his mouth open, and I secretly wish for a fly to land in his throat. “Excellent.”

The moment he leaves, I grab my purse and head out to my favorite coffee shop. I haven’t stopped thinking about the club and how Butterfly—whoever she is—made me feel last night. The thoughts running through my head before I fell asleep didn’t make me any less confused about what happened to me, but I know that I’m glad it did.
 

See, Mom? I don’t need a man.
 

I walk down the street towards the coffee shop, and I remember the first time my mother had tried to tell me about ‘life’ and what I ‘should do.' I was seven, and I’d met some new friends in second grade. Being a naive child, I assumed that if you liked somebody enough, then that was it. They were your girl/boyfriend depending on their gender. Mine just happened to be a girl. I’ll never forget the look of horror on my mom’s face when I told her that Chrissy was my girlfriend.

“That’s wrong!”
she’d chastised me.
“Girls don’t have girlfriends. They have boyfriends and only when they’re old enough.”

I tried to question her, but the only answer I got was
“because that’s how we’re made.”
That was it. So, me being me, I shrugged it off and accepted it. And why wouldn’t I? My mother, who I trusted more than anything, told me so, so I believed her.
 

“Hey, Kyle,” I say to the cashier. “Can I get a cappuccino, please?” I hand him the money before he can tell me how much. I walk directly to the pick-up point and see Ann serving.

Where’s Joss?
 

I know she’s working today, and I look around to see if I can see her around the shop. I give up when Ann lets me know my cup is ready.
 

Damn it. She’s made it in a coffee cup.
There’s not even a little heart of chocolate powder. It’s just…a mess.

I sit down at the back and take my phone out of my pocket. I press the screen for the internet, and I search for floggers. I smile when the screen loads up pages and pages of the dirty little toys that I saw last night. I hold back a giggle when I think back to Thor’s face when Jasper went at him.
 

“Hey.”

I look up to the quiet voice, and Joss is standing there in her beige barista uniform, her hair tied back in a messy bun, looking every bit the shy girl that I know. “Hey.”

“Can I sit with you?” She chews the inside of her cheek, and her eyes land on my drink.

“Of course,” I reply with a bit too much enthusiasm. “How are you?”

“I’m good, thanks,” she says with a small smile, and she reaches over to pick up my spoon then pulls my cup towards herself. “How are you?”

I watch as she moves the foam about and manipulates the chocolate into a heart shape. “I…I’m great,” I answer, and she pushes my cup back over to me.
 

“Ann forgets.”

“Oh, okay.”
 

There’s an awkward silence and Joss focuses on the table. I lift the cup to my mouth and take a sip and lick the drop of foam off my top lip. I look to Joss, and she’s looking at my mouth, and I wipe it with the back of my hand.

“Do I have milk on my face?” I ask, but I don’t feel anything there.
 

“No. You got it”—she shifts in her seat—“Did you guys have a good time in Lux last night?”

I nod. “It was okay”—I shrug—“I left early, though, I wasn’t in the mood.” I fight a grin, but I can feel the warmth on my face as I hold it back.

“Oh. I’m sorry I couldn’t go. Did you just go home?” Her eyes flick to mine for the briefest moment, and I swear I see a challenge in her eyes, which makes no fucking sense at all.

“After I left the club, I got in a cab, went home and crashed.”
I’m telling truth—sorta.

“Hmm,” she nods. “Me too. I stayed at my mom’s last night, and she had some friends over. It was pretty late when they left.”

I don’t mean to, but I snort a laugh, and her eyes snap to mine; the blue discs sparkle in the light. “Well, look at you saying more than a few words.”

Joss blushes. “I said I’d try harder.” She plays with her fingers on the table for a couple of seconds before speaking again. “I better get back to work.”

I drink the last of my coffee and stand up when she does. “Yeah, I better get back, too. It was nice sitting with you, Joss.”

She looks back to the counter nervously then steps closer to me. “Bye, Jai,” she just about whispers and slowly wraps her arms around me. I wrap mine around her waist, and our bodies connect for the briefest moment. “See you soon.”

She walks away and back behind the counter while I stand there like an idiot waiting for the moment my brain wakes up and tells me that what I feel is wrong.

The tiny white card I’m twirling through my fingers holds the code for the door I sneaked into from the alleyway, the name Madame gave to me, and the opening time to House. Nine-to-two. Typical for a club and even more-so for a ‘party’.

I’ve been thinking about my unexpected break with Joss all day and instead of making it loud and clear what I want, I have no fucking clue what’s going through my head, but I have a strong feeling who’ll be able to help me with my situation.

“What’s that?” Sadie asks as she walks through the living room and lifts my feet off the end of the sofa. She sits down and replaces my feet on her lap. “A business card?”

“No,” I reply and lift my hips to shove it in my back pocket. “Just some codes I need to remember.”

“Oh, well, what do you say about going out for a few drinks tomorrow night?” She begins to rub my feet and my toes curl inwards. Sadie hasn’t got the first clue how to massage, and instead the itching in my soles makes my legs twitch.

“Stop tickling my feet and I’ll think about it,” I laugh, and pull them away from her.

“I give good massages,” she pouts.

“Torture, more like,” I say, and she throws a cushion at me. “Hey! How’s your mom and dad?”

“They’re good. Mom’s going away this weekend with Aunt Carol. Something to do with the ladies’ golfing thing, I don’t know. My dad and Tom are going fishing,” she laughs. “Tom looks stupid fishing. He looks like he could sink the boat.”

“So where do you want to go?” The card is burning in my ass pocket. I haven’t forgotten the code, but I want to look at it again. “The girls will probably be up for it unless Cade’s with Mark. What about Mitch?”

“He’s coming too,” she grins and then bites her lip. “He, uh, drove to my parents to see me.”

“Get out!” I throw the cushion back at her. “Why did you
not
tell me this?”

I listen to Sadie’s excited chatter about Mitch wanting to see her again so bad that he took the long journey. She didn’t see much of her family and had spent most of the time with him…in bed.

“I don’t want to jinx it, but I think we could have something there,” she grins, her eyes lighting up as she presses her fists to her mouth. “So how about you?”

“What about me?”

“Dating? Hasn’t anybody gotten past your tough exterior to melt your heart, even just a little bit?” She looks at me with a determined expression for all of three seconds before she bursts. “Sorry, I can’t!” she screams, laughing. “You’re probably better off anyway, Jai. I don’t think any guy could handle you.” She turns her hands over to make claws and growls at me.

“Fuck you!”

We both giggle at my expense, but I don’t let her see that what she said weighs heavily on my heart. I swallow down the hurt, and I hold back my tears. My best friend can’t ever know that the way I am, and the way I act, fucks me up every single damn day of my life.

“I gotta get to work before I’m late.”

Sadie’s frantically looking around for her keys while putting in her earrings. Her white hotel blouse and black skirt are immaculately pressed, and her name badge is bouncing around as she’s lifting the cushions on the sofa.

“Hmm hmm,” I hum to catch her attention. She turns to me and scowls when she sees the keys twirling on my finger.

“Jai!” she whines. “You could’ve told me you found them,” she says and snatches them off me. “Where were they?”

“Right on the kitchen counter where you left them.”

“Oh. Well, I have to get going.” She gives me a quick kiss on my cheek and a quick squeeze before she takes off out the door.

I take the card out of my pocket and begin to twirl it in my fingers again. My phone beeps and I check the message.

‘Lux tomorrow night, all going, don’t you dare say no!’

I smile at Cade’s demanding text and reply in the only way I know how. ‘
Fuck you, bitch, don’t tell me what to do! But yeah, I’ll be there.’
I add a winking emoji at the end.

‘Haha! See you at your place tomorrow!’

I put my phone away and head to my room. I open my closet and pull out anything that would make me fit in at the club.
I need to go shopping.
“Yes.” I pick up my purse and, with a scheming grin, I’m off to the mall.

I’m just as nervous as the first time as I wait for whoever’s on the other side of the door to open it. The metal slide pulls back, and a pair of brown eyes behind a black mask greet me. I almost shit myself when his deep voice growls through the opening.

“Name?”

“Bunny.” I close my eyes, and my shoulders sag at my pathetic high-pitched voice.

The door opens, and I’m greeted with the biggest man I’ve ever seen in my life. “Fuck me. You’re huge!” I gasp and snap my hanging jaw shut.

He smirks and looks down on me, making me feel like a tiny child in trouble for purposely letting the school hamster out of its cage. Yeah, I did that; don’t judge. In my defense the cage was tiny, and the hamster was poked and prodded at all day by snot nosed kids. I set it free. Well, until we found it the next day half eaten—but that’s beside the point.

“Welcome back, Bunny,” he says in his bass voice, and the hazelnut tones of his skin make him eerily similar to the big guy from The Green Mile only not as sweet, if at all. “Come on in. Madame will see you now.”

“I haven’t made an appointment,” I blurt out.

His laugh resonates through my bones. “She told me to let you through to her office the moment you arrived. I’m Bear.” He holds out his hand for me to take and I weakly place mine in his. His handshake is surprisingly gentle, and I feel like a bitch for my reaction to him.
 

“It’s nice to meet you, Bear,” I say, and he releases my hand.

His dark eyes are playful, but his massive bulky frame says he’s not the type for games. His black shirt does little to hide his enormous muscles; neither do his black pants that are tight across his thighs.

“You too, Bunny.” He throws me a wink, closes the door behind me and disappears into a room to the left.

“He’s a big bastard,” I mutter and grip the handle to Madame’s office. “Guess, what? I’m back,” I say, walking in and taking out the envelope I got from the bank during my impromptu shopping trip. “Here’s the cash.” I place it on the desk, and she takes it without checking.

Madame lifts her head and sits back, a smug grin on her face. “We made that much of an impression on you? I
am
surprised.”

“No, you’re not,” I say with a scowl.

“No, I’m not. I have your form ready for your personal details, signature, and your membership card is all ready.”

My step falters as I’m walking to the chair. “You were so sure I’d be back?”

“Dear, Bunny, I knew it the moment you walked into my office. I must say, your mask looks wonderful with that outfit.” I’d slipped on my mask as soon as I’d gone through the outer door.
 

Madame eyes my outfit with keen interest. I’d found a convenient store that sold clothing that had everything from vintage to gothic. I picked up a tighter corset; white with a black lace overlay and thin black straps to hold my goods in place. Black ribbon threads and ties at the back with hook fasteners in the front. My short, netted, ruffle skirt complements my matching knee high boots. My hair is loose tonight instead of the ponytail, and my naturally straight hair with long choppy layers hangs halfway down my back.

“Thanks.” My cheeks heat and I hide it by shrugging my new black jacket down my arms.