Finding Charley (Full Circle) (10 page)

“Listen, Cash Money. I choose you, and we have been together forever.  You know me better than myself.  You will know when no one else does what I’m really feeling.  I promise you this.  When I know that I have Dylan where I want him, I will not leave you in the dark.  In fact, I want you by my side when he gets brought back to the reality that I’m in control of my life.”

“Char, here’s my problem.  Now that I know you’ve chosen me, I’m gonna have a helluva time not going all caveman territorial on his ass.”

“We have one problem, Cash, and that’s why I said to stop here.  I gotta make Mama and Dad think you pissed me off royally.  So, how do you suggest we do that?”

Cash doesn’t say a word.  Instead, he pulls me in for a long, slow kiss.  I try to ask him what his plan might be in between kisses, but he just mumbles to me that he’s thinking.  I guess I can work with that.

After our heavy make-out session, Cash and I come to the realization that we are probably done seeing and talking to each other except from a distance for the majority of the break.  Just thinking of a moment lost without him hurts my soul.

We agree the best way to say he pissed me off is that he got trigger happy and shot Bambi.  It might sound crazy, but even though I love to hunt and take down
the one,
I can’t stand for a baby's life to be taken too soon.  So, this just might be the spark to light the kerosene.  Knowing that it will need to be more than that, we decide the other half to this equation is me feeding my parents a lie that Cash doesn’t want me to go back to Southern.  He wants me to stay in Grassy Pond.  Now, that is totally believable and enough to tick off my dad royally.

“Cash, we have to start this now, ya know?”

“Uh-huh,” he says as his lips touch mine like he’s savoring every moment.

“Cash, I love you, and the minute all this shit is over, it’s you and me, forever.  You got that?”

“And that, Char-coal, is why I’m letting you go through with this.  Listen. When I drop you off at the house, you better cause one hell of a scene.  I mean, I want boot stomping, spitting nails, pissed off at Cash Money like never before.  Got it?”

“Damn straight, I do!  Pretty much, I just act like you're the asshat known as Dylan.”

“Yeah, why didn’t we think of that earlier?”

“I dunno, but the sooner we start this plan, the faster it’s gonna be over.”  He pulls me to him and turns me to where I am now backed against the wall.  He kisses my lips feverishly and then picks me up as I wrap my legs around
his waist.  If this happens to be the last time I kiss Cash Money, I wanna make sure that neither one of us forgets.  Nothing, and I mean nothing, will ever erase this perfect memory.  I also don’t think I’ll ever look at this side of the barn the same again.

Cash places me back onto the ground, and I gain my balance.  We walk hand-in-hand to the four-wheeler and make the trip to the house.  Cash drives extra slowly until he knows it’s time for the show to start.  He cranks up the speed and guns it to the front of the house. 
Here goes nothing.
  I jump off the back of the four-wheeler and yell at the top of my lungs, “I hate you!”  He flinches and I cower as the words spew from my mouth.  I blow a kiss as I look at him one last time, then I do a one-eighty, and march my boot stompin’ ass up the stairs.  By the time I get to the top step, the front door is open, and my dad is giving Cash a look that might just kill him. 
So far, so good.
   Now, let’s just see if I can pull off a good act inside.

“Charley Anne, what the hell is going on?”  Dad asks.

“Dad, Cash freakin’ killed Bambi!  Bambi!  The deer still had spots for cryin’ out loud, but that’s not even what matters anymore.  He wants me to drop out of Southern.  He wants me to stay in Grassy Pond and get married!  Like now.  Not wait until I graduate, and who knows, maybe even make Olympic trials!  I will not stop my life for him.”

My dad stands there with his hands in his pockets, looking for the right words to say.  As he begins to speak, Mama starts her own rant about how she can’t believe Cash would do that.  That’s where she played right into my hands.

“See, Mama. There you go taking his side instead of mine.  I knew this was going to happen.  I’m done talkin’ to all of y’all.”  I march upstairs and slam the door for an added effect. I pull out my cell and text Cash.

Me: I made them believe Cash $

Cash:  I knew u had a good poker face when you have 2

Me: I hate hurting them. U
think they r goin 2 hate me when it’s over?

Cash:  No, they could never hate you Char-coal.  I love u, and I want u to always remember that.

Me: I love u 2, and it kills me 2 know what we have 2 do 2 make this stop.  I’m going to pool @8.  Tessa will text u when I’m home.

Cash: k I’ll be waiting.  Love u Char-coal, 4ever

Me: Love u 4ever

With that response, I place my phone onto the dresser and get ready for bed.  That is when my bedroom door creaks open, and Tessa is standing there with her eyes half-open.

“Um, you wanna explain all that yellin’ downstairs?” she says as she crawls onto my queen-sized bed and makes herself comfortable.

“We had to make it look believable, ya know? The whole Cash and
me being done story.”

“Oh, so you chose this late at night for that?  What did you tell Mama and Dad? I heard something about Bambi.  I know that’s not the bullshit line you fed them.  Please tell me they have higher IQ’s than that!”

“Well, I used that for starters, but then made them think he wants to get married now and me drop out of Southern.”

“Char, that’s good. Damn good!  Oh, I’d hate to be Cash when Dad sees him tomorrow.  He bette
r hope he doesn’t have a gun!”

“I know.  I’m going to the pool at eight.  I told Cash you’d text him after I got back.  Tessa, not being able to talk to him is gonna kill me.”

“You can use mine, but hey, all I’m gonna say is there will be no sexting going on here!  You got that?  I will not be a part of that.”

“Shut up, Tess!  And slide over. This is my bed, not yours!”

Tessa and I fall asleep and awake to Mama making an abundance of racket downstairs.  She must be taking my drama out on a pan of biscuits, and as bad as it sounds, I can’t wait to eat them!

I roll out of bed, brush my teeth, hair, and throw on my sweats before grabbing my swim bag and walking downstairs.

I decide not to sit and eat breakfast.  That would mean twenty questions from Mama.  I grab a biscuit, a gallon of butter, bacon and walk out the door. 
Yummy.
  I put the Honda in the wind and make my way to GPAC.  It’s now or never, and I just might be rethinking this breakfast because my nerves are about to get the best of me.  To settle my uneasiness, I sing to the local country station between bites of bacon.

Pulling into the parking lot, I notice a lot of familiar cars, and even though the anxiety is about to kill me, I’m excited at the same time.  I have spent most of my life here if I wasn’t at school or the farm.  It’s my second home, and when I walked away, I left a piece of it behind.  It’s time to pick up that piece and
begin to mend my broken heart.

I giggle to myself, noticing that
my
spot is open.  The one that I’ve parked in since the day I got my license.  I ease on in, put the car into park, take a deep breath, grab my bag, put on my game face, and walk into GPAC with confidence.

As I open the door and make my way through the check-in station, I’m attacked by a high-squealing, three-foot leg parasite, also known as Molly, Coach Stephens’ daughter.

“Hey, Molly!”  I rub her head, and she looks up at me.  “I sure have missed you, munchkin!  What have you been up to?”  I ask as I pull her from my leg and pick her up.

“I learned how to write my name!
And… Dad taught me how to do a backflip off the diving board.  You wanna see?”

“Oh my!
  I have got to see that backflip!  I can’t believe you’re in kindergarten this year!  Where is your dad?  I think he has something for me.  You want to help me find him?”  Molly nods with the excitement that only children can show.

As I put her on the ground, she grabs my hand and drags me toward Coach’s office.  I have a feeling he has been waiting for me.

“Slow down, munchkin.”  We make our way to Coach Stephens’ office, and Molly knows exactly where to find him because it is pretty early for him to be coaching.  Lap swim is currently in session.

Coach Stephens is looking at a new Speedo catalog.  He must be getting ready to order a new stock of suits for the swim shop.

“Dad!  Look who’s here!”  Molly exclaims, pulling Coach Stephens from his thoughts.

“Charley!
  How are you doing?” he says once he gets his bearings together.

“I’m doing well, Coach.  I guess you heard I walked on at Southern.  It feels so good to be back in the water.  Did my coach email you my workouts?”

“She did.  Now, what I want to know is, what changed your mind?  From what I can recall, you were determined never to swim again.  I know it’s your business and not mine, but you are the best swimmer to ever step foot into this place.”

What do I say to that?  “Well, let’s just say that I found some fabulous friends that googled me, and the rest is history.  Oh, and Coach is super
cool!”

He looks at me like he knows there has to be more, but then just proceeds to hand me the workout.  He just replies with one simple comment, “It’s good to have you back, Charley.  This place has missed you, especially Molly.”

"I’ve missed it, too. You know it’s like a second home to me.  Oh, and Molly mentioned that she can do a backflip off the diving board now.  That’s awesome.  She’s got a career in diving in her future. I’m sure of that!”

He laughs, and I leave Molly with him as I go into the locker room and get ready for workout number one of break.  The aroma of warm chlorine hits my nostrils and is perfectly familiar when I walk into the pool area. I know what my permanent fragrance will be during break.  It’s just one of those smells that you can’t get out of your skin.

I take a minute to stretch and look over the workout.  It’s not too bad today, but tomorrow might kill me!  Dipping my cap into the water and getting ready to jump in, I notice Molly sitting on the sidelines ready to watch me.  I smile and give her a wave.  She is so stinkin’ cute and is like the team's little cheerleader.  This is all she has ever known.  I slide on my cap, put my goggles in place, shake my arms to loosen them a little more, and then dive in for a 500-meter choice warm-up.

I continue through the sets listed and finish my workout in a little over an hour and a half.  As I remove my cap, I arch my head backward into the water before pushing my arms up on the side of the pool and jumping out.  It feels amazing to be completely in my element in
the place I used to call home.

After showering and getting ready for the day ahead, I make my way back to the front to check out, but not before telling
Coach Stephens and Molly bye.

Getting back into my car, I let out a sigh of relief and head back to the farm.  Piper, Cash, Tessa, and I have a few kinks to work out.  I send Tessa and Piper a text, and they will let Cash know.

Me: On way 2 farm

Piper: Meet u there for shopping in 1 hr

Tessa: I’m ready 2

With that text, I know shopping refers to a new phone and attitude. I also know that Tessa will let Cash know the deal, and that we will meet up at some point today.  If I have to watch Cash from a distance too long, I just might go insane.  That boy has my body in one tangled up hot mess!

After arriving at the farm, I try to make a beeline for my room, so I can escape the questioning from Mama just a little bit longer.  That is put to a halt when she summons me to the living room as I am halfway up the stairs.  Doing an about-face, I put on my best poker face and get ready to lie to my parents, something that I do not want to do.

“Yes, Mama?”

“Charley, we need to talk.”

“About what?”

“You, Cash, and what you’re hiding.”

Hiding?  Does she know?  What does she think I’m hiding?  My palms begin to sweat, and I try my best to hide my true feelings.

“Mama, I’m fine.  Cash just pissed me off.  I want to be me.  No one telling me what to do, where to be, and I want to just experience life.  He’s trying to smother me.”

“I understand that, but as your mother, I can’t help but feel like there’s something you’re not telling me.”

“That’s it.”

Mama gains her composure before finally saying what she is thinking.

“Charley, you know you can talk to me about anything.  Did things go too far with Cash?”

I am at a loss for words.  She is still stuck on that.

“Mama!  I can’t believe you keep thinking that!  Please believe me.  You know that I wouldn’t do that!  Seriously, what do I have to say to make you believe that we haven’t crossed that line?”

“Charley, I believe you.  I just feel like something isn’t right from last night.  I mean, you couldn’t keep your hands off each other, or should I say lips, and then he suddenly goes barbaric
on you.  Telling you what you’re going to do.  Cash has never told you what to do, so I’m not buying it!?”