Feel the Heat: A Contemporary Romance Anthology (34 page)

I
clasp
the beer tight in my hand and take a sip, never taking my eyes off Ashley on the dance floor. We’ve been here for two hours, and she’s danced almost the entire time.

She’s driving me right out of my goddamn mind.

I wasn’t sure what to expect when I’d asked her to come, but this wasn’t it. I wasn’t sure how she’d be with my group of friends, three other guys and one lone female. Our group had bonded in our surgical rotation during med school, and we’d stayed close friends. Once a year we go to a tropical conference together.

The only woman in our group is Shelly, a pretty, tiny brunette with a gigantic personality that makes up for her small stature. When she’d met us, she’d sat us down and told us that we were not to hit on her, that she had zero interest in us, and to remove any idea of sticking our dicks in her out of our disgusting brains because it wouldn’t happen even if we were the last men on earth.

Yeah, that was her introduction.

It took years of fighting a fierce attraction before she relented and started sleeping with Ted. They’ve been screwing around for six months, and Jace, Xavier and me were not supposed to know about it.

Ted didn’t tell us, but it was obvious from the start of our friendship that there was something between Shelly and Ted, so when they finally hooked up nobody was shocked. Except for them, and they both seem to think it’s such a big deal they can’t tell us. We’re nice and let them be, making fun of them behind their backs when they slip from some room, their mouths swollen, their clothes disheveled, and think we’re idiots.

They’re getting sloppy though and I suspect they won’t be able to keep it up much longer.

A brilliant surgeon, with a take-no-prisoners demeanor, Shelly is one of those women that gets along better with guys than members of her own gender. She thinks women are frivolous and doesn’t understand half of what they get upset about. I’ve never seen her cry. Ask if she looks fat. Check her makeup in the mirror, if she bothered to wear any. She thinks shopping is a chore and chick flicks are for losers. Except for her feminine features that make her delicately pretty and are at complete odds with her character, she’s the quintessential guy girl.

Which is why I was shocked when she took one look at Ashley and they’d become instant best friends. I’d never even seen Shelly express an interest in a female. The last girl I brought around my friends was a sweet, nice preschool teacher, the most nonthreatening, inoffensive woman on the planet. Shelly had taken one look at Kelly, rolled her eyes and hissed,
Really? This is what you bring me?

But she’d loved Ashley like they were kindred spirits.

They’d literally ignored us for the entire night.

Xavier, always in the mood for a hookup, was off in the corner making time with the beautiful yoga instructor from this morning’s class. In the semi-crowded bar, she’d recognized Ashley and me, and came over to say hello. The second she and X had looked at each other, it had been on. He’s the player in our group, and can pretty much score with any woman he sets his mind too—except Shelly, of course.

That left Ted, Jace and me, huddled around a table watching Ashley and Shelly’s purses. Ted’s eyes are narrowed on Shelly, shaking his head as she and Ashley do a sexy little bump and grind.

Ashley’s taller than Shelly, so even though they’re glommed together, I have a clear view of her. She’s come undone over the course of the evening. Her hair has slipped from its messy side bun, spilling over one shoulder. She’s sweaty, all her makeup gone, as she’s thrown herself into dancing like this the last chance she’ll ever get to do so.

She looks fucking gorgeous. I will have to fight to keep my hands off her, but I’d made a promise and I never break my promises.

Of course, I planned on making sure she relented and begged me to take her. A plan that’s a little hard to execute with her not giving me the time of day.

Ted points his bottle at the two women, making quite a spectacle, and shakes his head. “Is it just me, or does Shelly have a girl crush?”

I laugh and scrub my hand over my jaw. “It does appear that way.”

Jace grins. “We should have gotten her a girl to play with ages ago.”

Ted opens his mouth then snaps it shut. Probably remembering at the last minute that he’s not supposed to be anything but Shelly’s friend.

Jace and I roll our eyes at each other.

Ted’s hand tightens on his beer. “Do you think they’re ever going to remember we’re here?”

“Doubtful.” Jace juts his chin in their direction. “Do you think they’re going to kiss?”

“Maybe if we’re lucky,” I say, not sure if I’m interested in seeing this or not. I mean, sure it would be plenty hot, but I want Ashley’s mouth to myself.

Ted drags a hand through his hair and I can tell he’s feeling as frustrated as I am. After hours of watching and not being able to touch Ashley, I’m on edge. Needing something to burn off all this pent-up energy.

“Aren’t you going to go out there and get her?” Ted asks, and I can hear the repressed aggression in his tone.

“I wasn’t planning on it.” I’d decided to leave Ashley to her own devices. Wanting to show her I respect her quest, but this was unanticipated.

“Why the hell not?” Ted’s voice is demanding. Impatient.

I shrug. “I have my reasons.” I’m not about to disclose what happened with Ashley. When I’d introduced her I’d said she was a friend of my brother and his fiancée.

Ted huffs and puts his beer on the table before saying, “I’ll be right back.”

Jace laughs and shakes his head. “Maybe you should take pity on him, he’s clearly suffering from a case of blue balls.”

I have no sympathy. Unlike myself, he’ll have an outlet. I scoff. “Which will be rectified as soon as he sneaks into her room tonight. He should be thanking me really.”

Ted is clearly worked up. I lived with the guy for a couple of years, I know how he operates. He’ll be taking all that frustration out on Shelly later and she’ll be lucky if she can walk tomorrow.

Jace narrows his gaze. “So what’s the deal with Ashley?”

In our small group, Jace and I are the closest. Just like Ted and X are the closest. Shelly belongs to us all. Well, if you don’t count the Ted situation. I shrug. “No deal. She’s just a friend.”

“Yeah right.”

“It’s true.” I catch sight of Ashley on the dance floor, some guy is spinning her and she’s laughing, her head thrown back, her white skirt flaring and flashing her spectacular legs. He lets her go and she slides back to Shelly. They start rubbing up against each other, and it makes me hard. This is worse than when a college girlfriend and I decided it would be fun to try Viagra.

“I like her.” Jace’s words break my concentration. “And Shelly likes her. Which is the ultimate seal of approval.”

“I like her too.” More than I know what to do with. I look back to the girls on the dance floor, where they are really starting to put on a show.

“Jesus Christ.” Ted’s back.

I grin at him. “What’s the big deal?”

Ted grits his teeth. “Nothing.”

I decide it’s time to take pity on him and break them up. Or at least I tell myself it’s about taking pity on him and not me. “I’ll take care of it.”

“Thank you,” Ted says. He’s close to breaking.

I weave my way onto the dance floor where the two girls are swaying hip to hip. I tap Shelly on the shoulder. She glares back at me.

I smile. “Can I cut in?”

“No, go away.” Shelly turns her back on me.

Ashley gives me an endearing, goofy grin that makes me want to bite her.

I tap Shelly again. “You’ve had her for two hours. I’d like to dance with Ashley now.”

Shelly huffs and heaps a big sigh. “Fine. One dance.”

“Four,” I counter.

“One.”

Ashley giggles.

I raise a brow. “Three.”

“Two.” Shelly puts her hands on her hips. “And that’s my final offer.”

“Deal.”

Shelly turns her attention to Ashley. “What do you want to drink, baby doll?”

“Whatever you’re having is good with me.” Ashley waves, looking light and free and happy.

I would kiss Shelly in gratitude but I don’t think Ted can take it. Besides she’d probably punch me.

Shelly pokes me in the chest. “Be nice. I like her.”

I give her a salute and take Ashley into my arms. I smile down into her sweaty, flushed face. She looked exactly like this in my bed and it makes me crave another taste of her. A craving I’ll have to resist. “As you can see, Shelly is the boss of us.”

Ashley laughs, looping her arms around my neck. “Yes, I can see that.”

I run my hand up her back, loving how she shudders. “So a little bi-curious are we?”

She grins. “That was just for fun.”

“I’m pretty sure we can make some money to pay for our drinks if you two agree to make out.”

She laughs again, clearly enjoying herself. “Maybe.”

I walk a path up her spine and she presses closer, meeting my eyes. Heat sparks between us and I try not to get distracted by her mouth. Try not to be tempted to take it, because I know she’ll yield under me. She’s relaxed and happy, and pliant. If I take her, she’ll let me, but then I’d break my promise and I won’t do that. I laid out the rules, now I have to abide by them.

I have something to prove to her, and that matters more to me than sex.

“Can I tell you a secret?” My fingers brush over the blade of her shoulder.

“Yes.” Her voice is breathless and filled with longing.

“We’re not supposed to know this because they are keeping it some sort of secret, but Shelly and Ted are sleeping together, and you’re giving the poor guy a heart attack.”

“I know.” She looks around me, back to the table, before pressing closer. “Shelly told me.”

Surprise lights through me. “She did?”

“Yes. She told me not to tell. But since you know, I don’t see the harm.” Ashley winks at me. “Just don’t blame me, I don’t want on her bad side.”

Another surprise. “Shelly doesn’t talk to anyone.”

Ashley shrugs. “We hit it off. I like her, she’s fun and different from my usual girlfriends.”

“I’m glad.” Because I am. It’s premature, but I want her to belong in my group. Want her to feel like she’s one of us.

She giggles. “Your friend Ted has a little fantasy about watching her with another girl. So she’s decided it would be fun to torture him. I agreed to help.” She gives me a flirty look. “Can I consider it mission accomplished?”

“I’d say so.” My hands slide down her back and settle on her hips. I’m sure she can feel my erection pressing into her stomach.

Our eyes lock.

Ashley’s blue eyes darken and her breath catches. In a low husky voice, she says, “It’s a game they play.”

“What is?” In my lust for her, I’ve lost track of the conversation.

“Pushing each other in public, knowing they can’t do anything, or reveal how they’re driving the other one crazy, because they’re a secret. They get off on it.” Ashley’s hardened nipples brush against my chest and I bite back a curse.

I promised I wouldn’t touch her, but I said nothing about talking. My palms hover at her hips. “That sounds like a game you’re interested in.”

She blinks up at me. “I wouldn’t know. I’ve never played it.”

“No?”

She shakes her head. “No. I don’t think I’ve ever taken that kind of time with a man, or had him take that kind of time with me.”

I lower my lips so they are close, but not touching her ear. “That’s a shame. You should change that as soon as possible. I’m sure you’d like it.”

Her fingers tighten on my shirt and when she speaks, her tone is breathless. “Why do you think that?”

“Because you’re nipples are hard. And if you asked me to touch you, I would find you wet.”

Next to my mouth her throat works as she swallows. She glides against me, her hips sway to the beat of the song, something island and tribal, highlighting all my base emotions for this woman who’s invaded all my thoughts. “Is that how you talk to your friends?”

“I speak the truth to my friends, Ashley. And I’m speaking the truth now.” I lift my head and stare into her eyes, filled with heat and lust. “Are you glad you came?”

“Yes.”

I pull her closer. “My friends love you.”

“I like them too.” She sinks into me.

The words remain unspoken, but I know we’re both thinking them. We’re playing Ted and Shelly’s game right now.

She thinks I’m going to cave.

She’s wrong. She’ll surrender, and when she does, I’ll make sure it’s a victory for both of us.

I
wake
, feeling delicious and languid. My legs are sore from all the dancing I’d done, my head pleasantly fuzzy from the drinks I’d consumed. My stomach’s a touch too full and rounded from the food I ate.

I’d danced like a crazy person, with abandoned freedom, and it had been fabulous. Christopher seemed to be able to do no wrong, because he danced like he did everything else, with good-natured confidence. After we’d closed the bar down we’d gone out to eat at a little dive restaurant and stuffed our faces with
panades
and fish tacos.

I didn’t think about calories once. Didn’t worry about Christopher seeing me eat something other than salad. Because I know he didn’t care. I could see by the pleased gleam in his eyes that watching me laugh and have fun, and moan in pleasure was more important to him than how I looked.

And that was a first. I liked it. Liked him.

He’d kept his word. He touched me only to dance, and kept our conversation mostly light and friendly. The few times where we’d veered, heat had shimmered between us.

We had chemistry. That much was clear. Too much chemistry. Somehow I trusted him not to take advantage of it. I don’t know why—I have such a terrible track record with guys, my instincts about them always wrong—but I don’t think I’m wrong about Christopher.

He’s a good man. Trustworthy.

We have no future, no possibility, but maybe if we can work through the desire, if I can scrub my mind clear of the night I’d spent with him, we could be friends.

The phone in my room rings and I lazily reach for it and mumble a sleepy hello.

“Are you still sleeping?” The sound of Christopher’s voice sends the equivalent of a shot of adrenaline through my blood.

I sit up. “Hi. I was just getting up.”

“Lucky girl.” His tone is amused.

I glance at the clock on the bedside table. Holy shit, it’s eleven thirty. I haven’t slept this late since college. I laugh. “Oh god, I had no idea.”

“Did you sleep well?” The question is slow, sliding over my skin like honey.

“I did. I slept fantastic actually.” I clear my throat. “Thank you so much for last night. I can’t remember when I’ve had so much fun.”

He chuckles. “No? You can’t think of even
one time
where you’ve had that much fun?”

A flush crawls over my chest as I remember him, moving inside me, driving me crazy. I play it cool. “Are you looking for compliments?”

“I don’t need any. I know how many times you came.”

“So smug.” My nipples harden and my belly dips. “May I help you?”

“Yes. We decided to ditch the rest of the conference this afternoon and head up to Hol Chan Marine Reserve to snorkel. Are you in?”

Excited, my heartbeat kicks up. I don’t even hesitate. “I’m definitely in.”

“Any chance you can be ready in fifteen minutes? We were thinking of going to lunch at El Fogon first. Sorry for the short notice. We were trying to be good and stick it out and just decided to bail five minutes ago.”

Before, this would have horrified me, but this was the new me. The me that cared about fun and adventure more than perfect hair. “I’ll meet you in the lobby in fifteen.”

“Excellent. See you soon, Ash.”

He hangs up and I smile, liking the sound of a name reserved for my best friends, on his lips. Then I jump out of bed to get ready, anxious to begin another day of fun.

* * *

I
’d thrown
on my bathing suit, shorts, and a tank top before putting my hair into a messy top bun held together with an elastic band, and been out the door. Now, after lunch, Shelly and I are sitting on the beach, taking a rest before we go snorkeling.

The guys are grabbing us drinks and we’re alone for the first time.

I grin at the petite blonde who’d I’d taken such a liking to. She was one of those people I felt like I’d known my whole life, and maybe the lives beyond. We’re sitting next to each other on a blanket and I nudge her with my elbow. “So how’d it go last night?”

She laughs and glances over her shoulder back to where the guys are. “Awesome. He was in such a mood. It was fantastic. You wouldn’t know it to look at him, but he’s quite aggressive in the sack, and let me tell you he let me have it.” She shivers a little. “So much fun.”

She’s right, Ted is a good-looking guy, but very mild mannered and unassuming. There’s nothing dangerous about him, except for the way he looks at Shelly. I don’t know why they believe they are fooling anyone, I’d known the second I’d met them that they were together.

I giggle. “Glad to be of service.”

“I think he’d try and lure you into our bed but Christopher’s already claimed you, so that makes you off limits.” She winks at me. “I indulge him and let him think that’s the only reason he can’t have you.”

Full of affection, I roll my eyes and grin. She doesn’t fool me, they are having fun with each other, and I’m a tool neither of them has any real interest in. My only purpose in this game is to fuel the spark between them, which is intense and considerable from what I’ve seen so far. “So why are you keeping it a secret? You’re a smart woman, so you must know it’s totally obvious there’s something going on between you.”

She sighs and shrugs. “Yeah, I know. Christopher, Jace and Xavier all figured it out about five minutes after it happened. I don’t know how to explain why we keep up the charade. It’s not logical and I like logical.”

I smile. “Well, I’m not at all logical, so feel free to lay it on me, I want to listen.”

She blows out a breath that concaves her stomach. She’s wearing a powder-blue bikini and she’s tiny everywhere. “I resisted him for years. I’ve always been one of those women that got along better with guys than girls. The guys were the smartest ones in our rotation and I wanted to study with them, so I infiltrated their group and basically told them they didn’t stand a chance with me. But from the start there was always something between Ted and me. We fought, sparked, argued. I hated every girl he dated and he hated every guy I brought around. But we were friends. And those stupid guys, they mean everything to me. I know it’s weird being the only girl in a group of males, but they are my best friends in the whole world. Med school is demanding, I’ve lost touch with the people I used to hang out with. My family’s okay, but I don’t get along great with my sisters so these guys are my people. I didn’t want to ruin that. So I resisted the attraction. Until I couldn’t anymore. Now I’m scared if we go out into the world instead of sneaking around we won’t make it and I’ll lose them.”

I touch her arm, nodding. “I can understand that. But you know you’ll never know until you try.”

“I know. I’m just avoiding it.” She bites her lip. “What if it’s so hot between us because we’re hiding it?”

“What if it’s not?” My gaze drifts over to Christopher. “But I do understand, life’s not always convenient, is it?”

“Isn’t that the truth.” She looks me up and down. “So what about you and Christopher?”

I can’t stop the heat from flaring. “Like he said last night, we’re just friends.”

“Yeah right.” She snorts. “Nobody’s buying that story either. Why else do you think Jace and X stay so far away from you?”

I glance over my shoulder. “We’re trying to be friends. But the truth is, I don’t really know him at all. I met him the first time a couple of days ago at his brother and my friend’s engagement party.”

She raises a brow. “And?”

“We hit it off.”

“And?”

“We were drunk.”

“And?”

I shrug. “We might have slept together, but that’s all behind me now.”

She laughs, as though the idea is preposterous, and maybe it is. “Yeah, no, it’s not.”

“It has to be.”

“Why?” She smiles at me. “I think you guys would be great together and I love you, so you have to stay.”

I wrinkle my nose. “I’m five years older than he is.”

“So?”

“We’re at different times in our life. I’m thirty-two and that kind of thing starts to matter.” I don’t want it to matter, but it does. And I have my quest to think about, I’m nowhere near finding myself.

There’s a few moments of silence before Shelly says, “All I know is that he really likes you and you fit with us.”

I swallow hard, and spot them walking back to us. “They’re coming.”

She jostles me with her shoulder. “Give him a chance.”

The guys stride up to the edge of the blanket, saving me from having to answer. I look at Christopher, holding out a drink to me, a smile on his face. I just want to melt. He’s not wearing a shirt and his shoulders are bare, broad and defined. His chest is sculpted, his abdomen toned. I remember how he felt under my hands, the flex of his muscles under my fingers. The movement of his hips between my thighs.

He must catch the direction of my thoughts because his gaze darkens, and dips to my lips. He crouches down, puts the drink into a grove in the sand before returning his attention to me. “Do you want to go swim a bit?”

I should say no, because he’s charmed me completely, and I’m smitten by him. I open my mouth to refuse, but instead say, “Yes.”

He takes my hand, and without looking away says, “We’ll be back.”

Then he stands, taking me right along with him.

In silence we walk to the ocean’s edge. The water is warm, lapping against my bare toes and I stare out into the sea. What am I doing? And why am I doing it?

He squeezes my fingers, and then tugs. “Let’s go this way.”

Off to the left the beach is more deserted and we walk, the water brushing our feet as we make our way past the crowded section before wading into the ocean. A wave crashes into me, almost knocking me over, but he catches me around the waist and holds me tight.

As our bodies slide together I gasp with the shock of it, my hands skim over the muscles in his arms when I should be pushing him away. I meet his eyes, so hot on mine.

I should shift out of his grasp, but I stare into the depths of his brown eyes, warm like whiskey, and I don’t. I stay right where I am. Right where I want to be.

I take in a quick breath. “You’re not making this easy.”

His hands walk a path up my spine, tracing the droplets of water he finds there. “I don’t want it to be easy.”

“I need it to be.”

“Why’s that?”

I think of the thousands of reasons I’ve been telling myself since I left his apartment. About my quest, about how he’s wrong for me. Too young. In different places. But the truth is, I’ve never felt more myself, more easy, than when I’m around him. Even the night of the party, when I’d first made him into a pawn to play in my one-sided revenge game with Trevor, there’s been something that draws me to him like a moth to flame. After ten minutes of talking to Christopher, I’d forgotten all about Trevor, riveted by the look in Christopher’s eyes and the skim of his hands down my back.

He makes me feel beautiful and alive and excited. He makes me forget how stupid I’ve been and all the poor choices I’ve made. Being around him, it makes me want just to be. And that is a luxury I’ve never allowed myself.

He scares me.

It occurs to me, with the water lapping against my skin, now is my chance to take a risk. To develop myself into the person I want to be. Before, I’d play a game, divert or distract, or make up some story that put me in the kind of light I’ve always thought guys want girls to be. The cool, flirty girl you can have fun with, that’s great in bed, and never gives you any hassle.

But it’s not real. It’s a façade I’ve created.

This, right here, is my chance to be vulnerable. To be honest and raw, and open myself up. Even if that honesty doesn’t make me look good, or desirable.

My heart beats hard against my ribs as fear grabs ahold of me, but I take a deep breath and take the plunge. I have nothing to lose but my ego, and maybe that’s something I need to kick to the curb anyway. With a small tremble in my lips, I look into Christopher’s eyes and tell him the absolute, god’s honest truth. “I don’t trust myself and I don’t trust the way you make me feel.”

Surprise flickers in his gaze, but his grip around my waist tightens. “What about me, Ash? Do you think you can trust me?”

I lick my dry lips. “I want to. Deep down I think I can, but I have a horrible track record with men and I always make the wrong choices. I don’t trust my judgment. I’m scared I’m just fooling myself.”

I brace myself, waiting and ready for him to pull away. Because that’s what I expect from men. Anything beyond fun and sex and they pull away. But if that’s who Christopher is, how he really feels about me, I need to know now. That I’m willing to face what might be a harsh truth, to walk away because I want something more or better,
is
progress. Not the progress I was expecting on this trip, but progress nonetheless.

I swallow.

His hands move up my back, but instead of releasing me, he presses closer, before settling his hands on my hips. “Tell me about the guy that hurt you.”

Tears fill my eyes and while I hate them, I don’t hide them. “I don’t want to. It makes me sound so dumb, and I don’t want you to think about me that way.”