Fated Memories (13 page)

“Good point.” Kitty sipped the last of her tea. She reached over, covering Maggie’s hand with hers. “We’re in this together, Mags. We’ll wait till spring.”

Still listless, Maggie went through her daily chores with the dead eyes of a battle-scarred vet. Kitty often caught her staring off in the direction of the river, as if hoping Simon would miraculously emerge, and it shamed her. Maggie’s grief over the loss of her love certainly trumped her self-pity. Maggie needed her. The words of her parents, her teachers, her counsellors, her friends, everyone who had ever tried to help her past her feelings of inadequacy, all rang in her ears. She had to step up to the plate, now, for Maggie’s sake and for her own sanity. She needed to be strong for both of them.

G
eneral McCall issued orders for the regiment to advance across the Potomac to Langley, Virginia. Kitty knew Maggie harbored the irrational thought that Simon might return and wanted to stay put, but Kitty insisted they move ahead. They’d resigned themselves to staying with the army. They also needed to commit to the life ahead of them.

Letting Maggie rest inside the tent, Kitty took their belongings outside to be organized and packed. In the distance she noticed John Gruber striding across the grounds, his movements easy and fluid as if gravity had no effect on him whatsoever. Even from this far away she could see he’d spiffed himself up with a clean uniform, his shirt tucked in and jacket buttoned.
Hmm, I’d bet no one made fun of him in school.

She tried to keep her interest from being too obvious until she realized his route took him straight to her tent with Chaplain Lawrence struggling to keep pace. The torrent of profanity she’d unleashed on him the other day came echoing back to her. They didn’t have armed guards with them, so most likely they weren’t coming to take her to the looney bin. Were they coming for a soul-cleansing or exorcism?

As they approached, Kitty stood wavering on her feet ready to bolt with the first splash of holy water. Though her greeting was cordial, her mind stayed on high alert.

Gruber’s face flushed as he drew himself up to his full height and thrust a small bunch of wildflowers at her from behind his back.

“Miss Kitty, I am truly sorry for the loss of your brother and I’m here to offer myself to you for protection and support. Chaplain Lawrence has consented to perform the ceremony.”

“What ceremony?” She felt her eyes bug open as they darted around for the easiest escape route.

Gruber’s face flushed a deeper red, and he stammered. “Why, the um, uh, wedding of course. Forgive me, Miss Kitty. I’m not good at this sort of thing. I’ve come to m… marry you.”

“Marry me?” She never saw that coming. Relieved, she tried not to laugh in the poor guy’s earnest face. This was her first proposal, ever. But it didn’t come from the soulmate she’d dreamed would sweep her off her feet and carry her off to a lifetime of wedded bliss. Sure, there was a physical attraction, but nothing else. And what did he mean by support and protection? Did he think she needed a man for that? “I don’t want to sound ungrateful, John, but aren’t you already married? I’ve heard you mention your wife. Her name is Linda, right?”

Gruber’s gaze lowered to his shoes and remained there as he shuffled his feet. “The smallpox took her right before I enlisted, Miss Kitty. I know how it is to lose someone you love.”

Kitty shared his grief and heard Chaplain Lawrence mumbling a prayer for him. “I’m sorry, John. I appreciate your offer, but I can’t accept. It’s way too soon to consider such a huge step.”

“But you must, I insist.”

“Insist all you want, the answer is no. Look, why don’t you give me and Maggie a chance to recover from the shock of losing Simon? Perhaps you can ask me again, another time.”

Without giving Gruber a chance to answer, Chaplain Lawrence cut in on the conversation. “That’s an excellent idea, Miss Kitty. Mr. Gruber’s intentions are admirable and I’m sure he understands it’s best to wait until you’re past your grief.”

Dejected and confused, Gruber allowed Chaplain Lawrence to lead him away.

Kitty expected to get a chuckle from Maggie when she broke the news of Gruber’s misguided offer. Instead, her shoulders sagged and her eyes got that distant gaze again. “We’d lay awake at night planning how we’d get married for real, me and Simon. He’d been putting away money from his paychecks and his winnings from gambling with the other men. He thought if we held out for a year with the army, the three of us could go back to Harrisburg with a stake for a new life.” Her tears burst through and she sobbed out the rest. “He honestly had no idea how he got us here and tried every day to wish us back, but it didn’t work.”

“I’m sorry, Mags. I know you loved him and I’m sorry I gave him so much grief over bringing us here. We can still go on though. We’ll find a way to make this work, you’ll see.”

***

As she mulled over John Gruber’s naïve proposal, it occurred to her that, without Simon around as a deterrent, she and Maggie might be viewed as fair game. She began to pay closer attention to the faces of the men around them. The ones they’d been friends with since the beginning, expressed sorrow and sympathy for their loss. But she saw John Leahy lurking around again. He and a few others followed their every move like predators readying to pounce. She didn’t worry so much for herself, but, without the training she’d had, Maggie was more vulnerable. She’d have to be more vigilant now, for both of their sakes.

To be safe, Kitty sneaked the revolver Simon had taught them to use in case of emergency, into her rucksack. She didn’t want to frighten Maggie any more than necessary.

Only a few friends still joined them for dinner. Chaplain Lawrence, Lulu, and their faithful friend Max always visited. The others were too uncomfortable being around the women after Simon’s death. One night, after everyone had returned to their quarters, she lingered with Maggie enjoying the coolness of the evening, her rucksack close at hand for security.

Aware of her sudden attachment to the carryall, Maggie raised the question. “Why on earth do you carry that ugly bag wherever you go, Kitty?”

Kitty tried to deflect her curiosity with a flippant answer. “Ugly? No, it’s a fashion statement.” She held it up between them for scrutiny. “Besides, if anyone gets too close, I can hit them with it like the old ladies in the park at home.”

Maggie’s suspicious eyes narrowed, and she snatched the bag away to rummage through it. Kitty’s heart flipped over while her mind scanned its repertoire of excuses for a plausible fit.

“Aha!”

“Maggie, I…”

Her hand pulled out the silver flask Max had given her. “Seriously, Kitty? You’re hiding alcohol in your bag?”

Bingo, excuse number 243. “Well, it’s not that I need it all the time, it’s just that… you know… sometimes… it helps. Especially with the heavy burden of stress we’ve had. Are you disappointed in me?”

Maggie put her arms around Kitty, holding her head against her shoulder. “Oh, honey, I’m sorry. This nightmare has been hard on both of us, I know. Just promise me you won’t let it go too far.” Her voice caught in her throat. “I need you now more than ever.”

Phew, that was a close one. Kitty hated lying to her, but it was the lesser of two evils. The gun must’ve fallen to the bottom of the bag. She’d have to make sure it stayed accessible for when she needed it.

Kitty didn’t sleep well anymore, her ears always attuned to the sounds of the night. Often she’d hear Maggie sobbing in her sleep and wished she could do more to reassure her they’d be okay. But to do that, she’d have to believe it herself. They were strangers in this place. While Kitty admitted to herself that she missed Simon’s company, what she missed the most, and had come to rely on, was his extensive knowledge of the culture and customs of the era. Her jumbled nerves were a constant reminder of their precarious position.

Slow and sluggish one morning, Maggie didn’t want to get out of bed at reveille. “I’ll get breakfast for both of us, Mags,” Kitty told her. “But make sure the tent stays closed, so no one knows you’re here alone.”

The quilt over her head muffled Maggie’s voice. “You worry too much. No one’s going to bother me.”

“Just stay in bed, I’ll be right back.” She waited for a moment in front of the tent before leaving for the commissary to make sure no one noticed that she’d left alone.

***

One of the few wooden structures in the camp, the cafeteria-style commissary served the soldiers a close version of nutritious meals. The meager rations, though, always fell short of being satisfying. While waiting in line with the others, hoping for something other than salt pork, Kitty heard someone cry out for a doctor. Her curiosity piqued, she shoved her way through the crowd to see if she could help until a doctor arrived.

A man lay on the floor, his tray of food scattered around him, in an obvious seizure. While one person ran off for the doctor, the others stood by murmuring, afraid to get too close. As the tremors subsided, Kitty knelt beside the soldier. He wasn’t breathing. Everyone who worked at a hospital in her time learned CPR so, by reflex, her brain flipped into rescue mode. She cleared the airway, gave two full breaths, and started chest compressions.

An angry outcry swelled around her. Horrified, everyone thought she was assaulting the poor man, and they tried to drag her away. She lashed out at the one nearest to her, knocking him off his feet. “Stop, you don’t understand,” she screamed. “I’m not hurting him, I’m helping him.”

Kitty dropped back to her knees, managing a few more compressions before the doctor arrived. He paused for a moment, studying her technique, and then nudged her aside. A quick assessment showed the soldier’s pulse had returned, and he enlisted two bystanders to carry the patient to the hospital.

The doctor’s eyes narrowed as he studied her. “Who are you? What you did saved that man’s life, but how did you know what to do?”

She couldn’t answer him. What would she say? Without a word she backed away and turned to the food service counter filling her satchel with enough food for her and Maggie. She left amid a rumble of scornful remarks and sharp stares.

As she walked the hundred or so yards back to their quarters, she berated herself for letting her guard drop. Up to this point she’d been careful not to display any knowledge she’d brought from her century. But now she’d committed the cardinal sin of using a rescue technique that wouldn’t be developed for another hundred years.
Well, screw it. I saved a life.
That had to count for something.

“Maggie look, they had apples…” Maggie lay sprawled on the floor exposed and moaning, her skirts hiked up to her waist, her face a swollen mass of bruises. The apples spilled to the floor as Kitty dropped to her knees. “Maggie, oh my God, Maggie, look what they did to you. I’m so sorry. I should never have left you.”

Kitty’s heart squeezed tight in her chest as a wave of dizziness washed over her. Still she forced herself to keep focused. After restoring her modesty and wrapping her in a quilt, Kitty bathed Maggie’s battered face while she wept. She tried to keep calm, but fury raged inside her. Only a depraved animal could violate a woman with such brutality. As if grieving over her dead husband wasn’t enough. “What bastard did this, Mags? Who hurt you?”

One faint word came from Maggie’s swollen lips. “Leahy.”

Kitty sat on the floor with Maggie’s head in her lap, stroking her hair while she cried. Guilt overwhelmed her. She’d seen the danger, yet she’d left her alone. She’d failed her for the last time, though. They will not be at anyone’s mercy, nor will they be the target of anyone’s abuse.

Once, Simon had sought revenge on a soldier who’d attacked her with a knife. He’d dismissed their questions, but Kitty worried that, someday, they’d discover Barnes’ body lying in a shallow grave on the camp grounds. She had the gun, but killing Leahy was too easy. She needed to feel his bones crunch and see the pain on his face. They would not be trifled with, and she needed to prove that to the other men.

As Kitty changed into her trousers and shirt, Maggie woke and struggled to get up off the floor. “Here, Mags, let me help you.” She held the quilt tightly around herself as Kitty guided her to the cot. After she had Maggie settled in, she put the flask of whiskey to her lips. “Take a good swallow honey. It will help with the pain. I’ll get a dose of morphine from the hospital for you.” She reached into her rucksack again and put the revolver into her hand. “Here, take this. If anyone comes into this tent, do not hesitate to pull the trigger. Remember how Simon taught us?” The mention of his name clouded Maggie’s face, but she nodded in agreement and held the gun with shaking hands. “I won’t be long, I promise.”

***

Kitty found Leahy in a clearing playing horseshoes with a few other soldiers. Good. She wanted witnesses. Spying from a safe distance, his casual, relaxed manner as his friends cheered a winning throw, strengthened her resolve. He raised his arms in triumph as they exchanged wagers amid a flurry of backslapping congratulations.

The group quieted as Kitty approached, her eyes intent on Leahy. His shoulders squared, his feet a few inches apart, only his twitching mouth hinted at his nervousness as he watched her.

Kitty took a firm stance two or three feet away to challenge him. “You enjoy beating up on women, Leahy? Want to try your luck with me?”

His snicker mocked her as he glanced around at his circle of friends. She stood her ground, staring into his eyes. His face grew serious as his open hand flew up to her face. It was the only invitation she needed. The unexpected kick to the mouth staggered him and drew blood. In her element now, her moves were quick and sure. Minutes later, he lay on the ground writhing in pain from the broken arm, cracked ribs, and missing teeth. She figured he’d be pissing blood for the next week at least.

As she circled in a warning stance to his friends, they backed away in awe, not wanting to test her further. She spit in Leahy’s face, but she directed her threat to the whole group. “This was just a warning. If any of you try to hurt me or my sister again, you will die.” Her head held high, a slight swagger in her step, she turned towards the hospital to get the morphine for Maggie.