Faithless (Mistress & Master of Restraint) (68 page)

“Don’t make fun of me,” I snap.

“I’m not. Remember the
if you want a hug
comment? Well, that’s how it is. If you want to have sex with them, then you know. It’s not about repayment or punishing yourself. You’re attracted to them and you want them. But I can already tell that you need to trust them. That’s what hindered your release with Cortez. You don’t trust him.”

“But I don’t have that with anybody
- I don’t trust anyone,” I snarl. I pound my fists into the mattress, not caring that my tits jiggle- I’m frustrated, dammit.

“Faith,” Grant whispers, leaning into me. He presses his lips to my ear and says, “You have two hands, use them. Do
n’t go find the nearest dick to ride. You’ll only end up hating yourself afterwards.”

“It’s not the same. I’ve tried
, and it doesn’t do anything for me,” I grumble.

“Then you’re doing it wrong,” Grant purrs into my ear. “It’s your hand, so no guilt or shame or repayment or trust issues.”

“I’m not attracted to myself,” I mumble. “I don’t want to screw myself.”

Grant chuckles in my ear and it trills down my spine. “It’s all in your
head. Your sex drive rivals any man’s. It doesn’t make you a bad girl or a slut… just very horny. Don’t inappropriately touch your friends or guardian or a cute boy. Go into your room, strip naked, and lay on the bed. Open your mind to a fantasy. You can pick anyone you want or make someone up… and they will do everything you imagine. After you cum, you will be free of guilt, shame, and you will be relaxed and focused.”

“Okay,” I swallow. “I… still think I’ve been doing it wrong.”

Grant slides off the bed and gets the blankets. The fabric settles over me like a protective curtain. He tucks me in and curls up around my side. “Make me a promise,” he demands.

“Ummm…” swallow. “I need to know what it is. I’m not blindly agreeing to anything.

“Do you trust me?”

“Yeah, but I probably shouldn’t.”

“Good answer,” he laughs. “Promise me that if you have sex again, it will only be with someone you’ve been with. I will allow Caleb, because, like an oncoming train, I know it’s coming for you.”

“That’s
an odd request,” I grumble. “I’m pretty sure Wil is playing me, because I feel him too much- too good to be true scenario, that. Ezra is unavoidable. I’ll pretend I know what you’re talking about with Gunner. As for Cortez, I’d rather fill my vagina with concrete than suffer Cort rutting around in there again.” I shudder from the thought.

“You’re not ready for anyone new. Gunner is going away
, and I think that’s for the best. No, not Cort- I get it. Two men have… pleased you. They will please you again.”

“I’m not touching Wil without a hazmat suit. I will never be able to look at him
without seeing him inside
her
. I won’t lie, I want him badly- but no. Ezra, he isn’t for me, and it will only happen if we are ordered to do it. So I guess it’s no sex for me. So sure, why the hell not? I promise to be good. I should probably just be celibate. It’s for the best. I suck at sex anyway.”

“You don’t suck at sex,” Grant chuckles. “You just really suck at picking sexual partners.”

“Truer words have never been spoken,” I murmur, and not a hint of sarcasm leaches through.

“I will prove that a fantasy is better than reality. I live and breathe fantasy. I want you to touch yourself underneath the blanket. I won’t touch you or look at you. Listen to the words I speak and follow my direction. I will show you how to fantasize.”

“Whoa…” I gulp.

Grant surrounds me and presses his lips to my ear and breathes, “Envision a man. Bring him into sharp focus, until he is a living, breathing entity that is with you.
Feel him, smell him, see him, hear him, touch him, taste him,” Grant chants, his voice lulling me into the fantasy. “His muscular arms surround you, and your legs eagerly wrap around his hips. He is dying to kiss you and sink into your hot flesh,” Grant moans in my ear, causing me to whimper. “Firmly affix the image of your fantasy man in your mind. Got him?”

“Yes,” I whisper, refusing to admit who I’m creating in my mind- he is no fantasy. He was pulled from my real life.

“Is he handsome?” Grant purrs.

“Yes.”

“Is he hot?” Grant asks, and he sounds wicked amused.

“Yes,
” I bashfully murmur.

“Does he make you hot?”
he breathes in my ear with a seductive lust-filled voice.

“Yes,” I say with a little snort.

“How about wet,” Grant hotly whispers into my ear, arching his body against my side. “Are you wet, Faith? Are you wet for him right now?”

“Oh, God,” I groan, moisture pooling between my legs. For once
, I welcome my pussy acting up and squeezing like a fist. Grant is going to do what the others couldn’t. He’s going to make me cum, and he’ll do it without touching me with so much as a fingertip- it’s his super power. Grant’s words are orgasmic.

“The fantasy, handsome, hot, juice causing man is kissing down your neck. Peppering little kisses,” Grant rapidly chants. “His hot, wet tongue flicks out, licking the length of your neck and you gasp. Gasp for him, Faith,” Grant orders.

“Uh,” gasps from my throat. There was nothing I could do to stop it. I wiggle around the bed, hotter than I’ve ever been before.

Grant leans harder into my side, his chest at my shoulder, groin hard against my hip, and his lips pressed tightly to my ear. “Fantasy man is enthralled with your artwork. His tongue traverses wet lines, following and flowing with your tattoos. That little heart around your left nipple, fantasy man thinks that is the sexiest thing he’s ever seen.”

“Oh, fuck! You have looked!” I yelp out.

“No, fantasy man looked and lik
e what he saw- not me,” Grant slyly whispers, edging his way around what he considers cheating. “Get back inside your head, Faith. We don’t want fantasy man to poof from your mind.” Grant pauses for a moment, his body shuddering at my side. He swallows so violently that it echoes in my ear.

“Pretend that the tip of your index finger is fantasy man’s tongue. Everywhere that moist tongue goes, draw your finger in its path,” Grant coaxes.

“Yes,” I moan, using my finger as his tongue. I draw it down my neck, impatiently lifting my shirt until I meet bare skin, and then swirl my fingertip around my left nipple. “AH!” I grunt out as I arch off the bed. My body has never been more sensitive. Sweat beads on my skin as I pant out my pleasure.

“A light nip to that little bud has you writhing in ecstasy. It feels so good that your legs scissor and open wide, begging for that tongue to dip down and take a heady taste of your juices.”

“Oh, Grant!” I shout as my finger trails down my chest, past my belly, dipping beneath the waistband of my jeans, and slips between my thighs. Impatient again, not caring how salacious it is. I yank my jeans down and spread my legs as far as they will go.

“Shhh…n
ow remember, he’s fantasy man,” Grant lightly chastises. “You’re so wet that it’s dripping down your ass cheeks and saturating the sheets. You’re so hot for him that it’s maddening- if you don’t have him soon, you’ll scream in misery.”

A small, pained sound escapes my throat as my fingertip quickly rubs over my clit. “I’m so close,” I cry out.

“Oh, fuck,” Grant hisses in my ear. “Slow your pace. He’s nowhere near ready for that, yet,” he hoarsely says. “Fantasy man loves the sweet taste of your beautiful pussy, the way you mew when he runs the flat of his tongue against your swollen clit. Oh, Faith,” Grant groans. “That tiny nub is rosy-red with arousal, peeking out its hood, just begging for a tongue lashing. I want to… I mean… he wants to suckle that little nub until you’re so wet that you’re ready for his cock.”

“I’m ready now,” I groan
, and Grant nervously laughs in my ear. He doesn’t touch me, just his lips at my ear as he breathes his suggestions. I can’t help the slight rock of my body against the hard press at my hip. Grant tries not to return the pressure, but fails miserably.

“He’s your fantasy man. Tell him what you want, Faith,” Grant’s voice is lulling, coaxing my words.

“I want him inside me- deep inside me,” I moan.

“He kneels between your wide-spread thighs.” As if by Grant’s command, my legs spread and my hips lift to the imaginary man that isn’t between my thighs. “He kneels between your thighs, looking at the bounty spread open before him. His cock is long and proud, curved as if it were meant only for you. He says you are gorgeous down there. So pink… and fragrant… and sweet… and tight… and so fucking wet,” he growls and my pussy starts spasming. I whimper around the need to cum for him but not yet… not until he is inside me.

“You felt like velvet and silk beneath his tongue, but even better beneath his cockhead. He’s so aroused that that cockhead looks like a plum. So hard and heavy with blood, it blooms and turns purple. He’s fascinated with how perfect his cock looks against your pink pussy- so fascinated that he strokes you over and over, up and down, round and round, he swirls that engorged cock over your weeping pussy.”

“Please,” I beg in a reedy voice.

“Fantasy man leans forward and takes your lips in the sweetest of kisses- your first real kiss with him. He wants you to feel his lips as he slowly slides that hot, hard length deep inside your tight pussy.” We moan together- Grant and I. My body clenches hard around my invading, thrusting fingers, his trouser-covered cock throbs at my hip.

“You feel like scorching hot silk. Soft flesh hugging me tightly, gripping, and milking the cum from my body. I mean, fantasy man’s body,” he breathlessly stumbles over the words. “Do you feel it, the constant stream of warm precum flowing from that plum of a cockhead? Do you feel it, Faith? Do you love knowing that a part of your fantasy man is deep inside of you, flowing into you?” Grant rapidly chants.

My body goes insane. My spine bows. My eyes roll into the back of my head. A deep, mournful moan spills from my parted lips as my cunny spasms and clenches around the four fingers I have violently thrusting inside me. With ragged breath, I break apart- I cum all over my own hand. The pleasure is blinding.

“He’s coming for you, Faith. He’s coming just for you. It’s an indescribable experience- your fantasy man coming inside of you for the first time.” Grant gasps and groans into my ear as his release washes out of him
in a rush, and dampens his pants until my hip is hot and wet from his orgasm.

No shame.
No remorse.
No game.
No payment.

Trust and friendship and pleasure.

Over three hundred times I’ve had sex, and I’ve only had two orgasms from it. I thought I was broken. I’m not. Grant’s voice always gets me off. But this time, Grant guides my hand, showing me how to fantasize, and gives me a guilt-free way to seek release. I fear that I will always have his voice echoing in my head while I ride my hand.

“Thank you,” I gasp.

Grant’s laugh is warm and affectionate. He kisses my cheek with moist lips that smile against my flesh. “If you are a good girl and behave… someday, when you are finally an adult, I will do all the things to you that you imagined me doing in your fantasies. Use that from now on- have me make love to you in your mind.”

“What?” I say in utter shock.

“Like you honestly didn’t think I was doing all of those things to you in my own mind,” Grant says with a mischievous smirk. “That was by far, one of the top ten best sexual experiences of my entire life… and the most innocent. I don’t even feel guilty about it. I didn’t touch. I just whispered. I can’t help what I think or how my body reacts.”

“I… I don’t know what to say. I…”

“Faith, from now on when you need something, just ask for it!” Grant orders. “I will always give you what you need, and if I can’t, I will find someone who can. Don’t be self-destructive. You are worth so much more than you think. Say,
I am important to the people in my life, and I deserve to be treated with respect
. Say it!”

“
I am important to the people in my life, and I deserve to be treated with respect,” I mumble.

“That means respecting yourself
, too, Faith. Remember that,” Grant says. “Now, why did you visit me today?”

“I came to apologize,” I shyly say, “but I managed to anger you more with Dexter. I’m really sorry, Grant. I didn’t mean it.”

“I know,” he whispers against my temple. “Apology accepted. What happened with Dexter will never leave this house. Don’t feel ashamed. Just use it as a lesson for the future.”

“How do I know when sex is the right thing?” I meekly ask.

“When you feel pleasure all around- emotionally, mentally, and physically- and you know there will never be any regrets. If it feels like you are with them because you have something to prove or someone to pay, don’t do it. If it makes you feel how you feel right now, don’t hesitate to enjoy- just be safe, is all I ask.”

“I’m really sorry about everything. I’m such a dumbass,” I growl.

“No, you’re not a dumbass- you are a teenager,” Grant says with great amusement.

“Same thing,” I snort. “A question that will be uncomfortable because of what we just did. But, Stanton is depressed. Can you plan a boys’ night out or something, and invite Caleb along. Stanton needs to not be around his girls right now. He needs some guy time.”