Every Good Boy Deserves Favor and Professional Foul (7 page)

MCKENDRICK:
On the contrary. That's why I'd be really very interested in any extra-curricular activities which might be going. I have an open mind about it.

ANDERSON:
(
His wires crossed
) Oh, yes, indeed, so have I.

MCKENDRICK:
I sail pretty close to the wind, Marx-wise.

ANDERSON:
Mind you, it's an odd thing but travel broadens the mind in a way that the proverbialist didn't quite intend. It's only at airports and railway stations that one finds in oneself a curiosity about er—er—erotica, um, girly magazines.
(
MCKENDRICK
realizes that they've had their wires crossed
.)

MCKENDRICK:
Perhaps you've come across some of my articles.

ANDERSON:
(
Amazed and fascinated
) You mean you write for—?
(
He pulls himself up and together
.) Oh—your—er articles—I'm afraid as I explained I'm not very good at keeping up
with the philosophical….
(
MCKENDRICK
has gone back to his former seat to fish about in his briefcase. He emerges with another girly magazine and hands it along the aisle to
ANDERSON
.)

MCKENDRICK:
I've got one here. Page sixty-one. The Science Fiction short story. Not a bad life. Science Fiction and sex. And, of course, the philosophical assumptions of social science.

ANDERSON:
(
Faintly
) Thank you very much.

MCKENDRICK:
Keep it by all means.
(
ANDERSON
cautiously thumbs through pages of naked women
.)

I wonder if there'll be any decent women?

2. INT. HOTEL LOBBY. PRAGUE

We are near the reception desk
.
ANDERSON, MCKENDRICK
and
CHETWYN
have just arrived together. Perhaps with other people. Their luggage consists only of small overnight suitcases and briefcases
.

MCKENDRICK
is at the desk half-way through his negotiations. The lobby ought to be rather large, with lifts, etc. It should be large enough to make inconspicuous a
MAN
who is carefully watching the three Englishmen. This
MAN
is aged thirty-five or younger. He is poorly dressed, but not tramp-like. His name is
PAVEL HOLLAR.
The lobby contains other people and a poorly equipped news-stand.
We catch up with
ANDERSON
talking to
CHETWYN
.

ANDERSON:
(
Enthusiastically
)
Birmingham!
Excellent university.
Some very good people.
(
The desk
CLERK
comes to the counter where
MCKENDRICK
is first in the queue. The
CLERK
and other Czech people in this script obviously speak with an accent but there is no attempt here to reproduce it
.)

CLERK:
Third floor. Dr McKendrick.

MCKENDRICK:
Only of philosophy.

CLERK:
Your baggage is there?

MCKENDRICK:
(
Hastily
) Oh, I'll see to that. Can I have the key, please?

CLERK:
Third floor. Dr Anderson. Ninth floor. A letter for you. (
The
CLERK
gives
ANDERSON
a sealed envelope and also a key
.
ANDERSON
seems to have been expecting the letter. He thanks the
CLERK
and takes it
.)
Dr Chetwyn ninth floor.
(
The three philosophers walk towards the lifts
.
PAVEL
watches them go. When they reach the lift
ANDERSON
glances round and sees two men some way off across the lobby, perhaps at the news-stand. These men are called
CRISP
and
BROADBENT. CRISP
look very young, he is twenty-two. He wears a very smart, slightly flashy suit and tie
.
BROADBENT
balding but young, in his thirties. He wears flannels and a blazer
.
CRISP
is quite small
.
BROADBENT
is big and heavy. But both look fit
.)

ANDERSON:
I say, look who's over there … Broadbent and Crisp.
(
The lift now opens before them
.
ANDERSON
goes in showing his key to the middle-aged
WOMAN
in charge of the lift
.

MCKENDRICK
and
CHETWYN
do likewise. Over this:
)

CHETWYN:
Who? (
He sees them and recognizes them
.) Oh yes.

MCKENDRICK:
(
Sees them
.) Who?

CHETWYN:
Crisp and Broadbent. They must be staying here too.

MCKENDRICK:
Crisp? Broadbent? That kid over by the news-stand?

ANDERSON:
That's Crisp.

MCKENDRICK:
My God, they get younger all the time.
(
The lift doors close. Inside the lift
.)

ANDERSON:
Crisp is twenty-two. Broadbent is past his peak but Crisp is the next genius in my opinion.

MCKENDRICK:
Do you know him?

ANDERSON:
Not personally. I've been watching him for a couple of years.

CHETWYN:
He's Newcastle, isn't he?

ANDERSON:
Yes.

MCKENDRICK:
I've never heard of him. What's his role there?

ANDERSON:
He's what used to be called left wing. Broadbent's in the centre. He's an opportunist more than anything.
(
The lift has stopped at the third floor
.)
(
To
MCKENDRICK
.) This is you—see you later.
(
MCKENDRICK
steps out of the lift and looks round
.)

MCKENDRICK:
Do you think the rooms are bugged?
(
The lift doors shut him off.
Inside the lift
.
ANDERSON
and
CHETWYN
ride up in silence for
a few moments
.)

ANDERSON:
What was it Aristotle said about the higher you go the further you fall…?

CHETWYN:
He was talking about tragic heroes.
(
The lift stops at the ninth floor
.
ANDERSON
and
CHETWYN
leave the lift
.)
I'm this way. There's a restaurant downstairs. The menu is very limited but it's all right.

ANDERSON:
You've been here before?

CHETWYN:
Yes. Perhaps see you later then, sir.
(
CHETWYN
goes down a corridor away from
ANDERSON
'
s corridor
.)

ANDERSON:
(
To himself
) Sir?
(
ANDERSON
follows the arrow towards his own room number
.)

3. INT. ANDERSON'S HOTEL ROOM

The room contains a bed, a wardrobe, a chest. A telephone. A bathroom containing a bath leads off through a door
.
ANDERSON
is unpacking. He puts some clothes into a drawer and closes it. His suitcase is open on the bed
.
ANDERSON
turns his attention to his briefcase and brings out
MCKENDRICK
'
s magazine. He looks round wondering what to do with it. There is a knock on the door
.
ANDERSON
tosses the girly magazine into his suitcase and closes the case. He goes to open the door. The caller is
PAVEL HOLLAR
.

ANDERSON:
Yes?

HOLLAR:
I am Pavel Hollar.

ANDERSON:
Yes?

HOLLAR:
Professor Anderson.
(
HOLLAR
is Czech and speaks with an accent
.)

ANDERSON:
Hollar? Oh, heavens, yes. How extraordinary. Come in.

HOLLAR:
Thank you. I'm sorry to—

ANDERSON:
No, no—what a pleasant surprise. I've only just arrived as you can see. Sit where you can. How are you? What are you doing? You live in Prague?

HOLLAR:
Oh yes.
(
ANDERSON
closes the door
.)

ANDERSON:
Well, well. Well, well, well, well. How are you? Must be ten years.

HOLLAR:
Yes. It is ten. I took my degree in sixty-seven.

ANDERSON:
You got a decent degree, too, didn't you?

HOLLAR:
Yes, I got a first.

ANDERSON:
Of course you did. Well done, well done. Are you still in philosophy?

HOLLAR:
No, unfortunately.

ANDERSON:
Ah. What are you doing now?

HOLLAR:
I am a what do you say—a cleaner.

ANDERSON:
(
With intelligent interest
) A cleaner? What is that?

HOLLAR:
(
Surprised
) Cleaning. Washing. With a brush and a bucket. I am a cleaner at the bus station.

ANDERSON:
You wash buses?

HOLLAR:
No, not buses—the lavatories, the floors where people walk and so on.

ANDERSON:
Oh. I see. You're a
cleaner
.

HOLLAR:
Yes.
(
Pause
.)

ANDERSON:
Are you married now, or anything?

HOLLAR:
Yes. I married. She was almost my fiancée when I went to England. Irma. She is a country girl. No English. No philosophy. We have a son who is Sacha. That is Alexander.

ANDERSON:
I see.

HOLLAR:
And Mrs Anderson?

ANDERSON:
She died. Did you meet her ever?

HOLLAR:
No.

ANDERSON:
(
Pause
) I don't know what to say.

HOLLAR:
Did she die recently?

ANDERSON:
No, I mean—a cleaner.

HOLLAR:
I had one year graduate research. My doctorate studies were on certain connections with Thomas Paine and Locke. But then, since sixty-nine….

ANDERSON:
Cleaning lavatories.

HOLLAR:
First I was in a bakery. Later on construction, building houses. Many other things. It is the way it is for many people.

ANDERSON:
Is it all right for you to be here talking to me?

HOLLAR:
Of course. Why not? You are my old professor.
(
HOLLAR
is carrying a bag or briefcase. He puts this down and opens it
.)
I have something here.
(
From the bag he takes out the sort of envelope which would contain about thirty type-written foolscap pages. He also takes out a child's ‘magic eraser' pad, the sort of pad on which one scratches a message and then slides it out to erase it
.)
You understand these things of course?

ANDERSON:
(
Nonplussed
) Er …

HOLLAR:
(
Smiling
) Of course.
(
HOLLAR
demonstrates the pad briefly, then writes on the pad while Anderson watches
.)

ANDERSON:
(
Stares at him
) To England?
(
HOLLAR
abandons the use of the pad, and whispers in
ANDERSON
'
s ear
.)

HOLLAR:
Excuse me.
(
HOLLAR
goes to the door and opens it for
ANDERSON. HOLLAR
carries his envelope but leaves his bag in the room
.
ANDERSON
goes out of the door baffled
.
HOLLAR
follows him. They walk a few paces down the corridor
.)
Thank you. It is better to be careful.

ANDERSON:
Why? You don't seriously suggest that my room is bugged?

HOLLAR:
It is better to assume it.

ANDERSON:
Why?
(
Just then the door of the room next to
ANDERSON
'
s opens and a
MAN
comes out. He is about forty and wears a dark rather shapeless suit. He glances at
ANDERSON
and
HOLLAR.
And then walks off in the opposite direction towards the lifts and passes out of sight
.
HOLLAR
and
ANDERSON
instinctively pause until the
MAN
has gone
.)
I hope you're not getting me into trouble.

HOLLAR:
I hope not. I don't think so. I have friends in trouble.

ANDERSON:
I know, it's dreadful—but… well, what is it?
(
HOLLAR
indicates his envelope
.)

HOLLAR:
My doctoral thesis. It is mainly theoretical. Only ten thousand words, but very formally arranged.

ANDERSON:
My goodness … ten years in the writing.

HOLLAR:
No. I wrote it this month—when I heard of this congress here and you coming. I decided. Everyday in the night.

ANDERSON:
Of course. I'd be very happy to read it.

HOLLAR:
It is in Czech.