Ethans Fal (28 page)

The door to the balcony is ajar and I can see that Ada is stretched out on the lounger in the fading sun. Her long legs soaking up the last of the rays. She is wearing a short white peasant skirt and a black halter neck bikini top. Her hair is scraped high but loose in a floppy bun and one hand is shading her eyes from the glare of the page she is focused on. She is so distracted by the book she is reading, she hasn’t heard me approach. I crouch down beside her and peek over her shoulder.

“Ah, you are a romantic after all.” She jumps a little but she was expecting me. She tilts her head away and exposes her smooth, silk-soft skin on her neck, giving me better access. My lips are eager to claim that delicacy with a million kisses, covering every inch of her neck and collar bone. She draws in a deep breath and slowly exhales a sensual sound that is erotically languid. A tiny groan escapes her lips when I stop. She closes the book and shuffles her body up the lounger to sit crossed legged. I throw my own leg over and straddle the lounger to face her. I pull both her feet toward me and start to massage the arches with my thumb. She lets out an appreciative sigh.

“I used to think Wuthering Heights was the most romantic story ever. It was my favourite in school. I loved the dark tortured intensity of Heathcliff.” Her voice is quiet and she places her hand on the cover staring at more than the exterior of the book.

“And now?” I ask.

“Now…It’s a tragedy but also I think Heathcliff was a complete bastard.” Her tone is clipped and certain. I laugh.

“And Cathy was blameless in their demise?” I challenge.

“No, they were both culpable. I just think he was more of a bastard than the hero I romanticised about when I was in school.” She is quiet for a while. Her eyes glaze with water and she is lost looking out toward the ocean and setting sun. “But I guess I am older now and the world is uglier. The story hasn’t changed; I am changed.” I apply extra firm pressure under the ball of her feet and it works effectively to bring her back from her wayward thoughts. I don’t know where she goes when she drifts like that, but that is what tonight is about. “You know that is a first edition you are fondling? My mother collected them. You could’ve cleaned out my bookcase and had enough to live quite nicely.” I have several first editions.

“I noticed.” She smiles wryly. “But you must have a pretty low opinion of me if you think I would steal from you.” Her arms cross in her defence at the presumed character attack.

“Not a low opinion of you, Ada, but those books are worth a small fortune. A similar one to the one in your hand recently sold for six figures, and life isn’t always so cut and dried. A precious book in exchange for a safe place to live, food on the table…In my experience some people wouldn’t think that such a difficult choice.”

“Maybe so, but I could never sell something like this… It’s more than its price.” She carefully places the book on the table on a shelf out of the sun.

“So, not a romantic?” I quip lifting just one foot to work on, my fingers squeeze along the tendons between the tiny bones and I tug at her toes, releasing the pockets of air with a click.

“Hmm, let me think…I agree to a ‘fuck only’ deal with Mr. Hot and Handsome. I can’t see Ms. Austin. or Ms. Bronte writing about
that
romantic scenario–hardly swoon worthy. Not sure how Miss Bennett would’ve responded to I’m sticking this plug in your arse because I want in and I’m too big for your first time.” She snickers.

“I would challenge your literary assumption there, Ada. Mr. Darcy was a gentleman, he most definitely would’ve used anal training toys before he fucked Elizabeth in the arse.” I raise my brow and she must feel me harden against her other foot resting between my legs. She barks out a rough laugh and an unladylike snort.

“I apologise, Mr. Cates, if I have offended you and questioned your gentlemanly intentions. You are clearly a true gentleman and I appreciate the care and attention you have invested in my
training
. ” She is all sass and cheek.

“Apology accepted.” My voice is gravelly and her face heats when I shift a little forward so her other foot is now digging into my rock solid erection. She wiggles her toes when I try to pull the foot I am holding to my lips. “No, oooo…super ticklish. Don’t do that, Ethan! I mean it!” She squeals. “I’m likely to kick you in the face.” The tension in her leg is impressive, as she tries to pry her foot from my grasp. I twist round so my back is to her and I have one of her legs wedged under my arm and the other trapped under one thigh. I keep her leg bent and despite her feral flailing behind me she is completely at my mercy. Both her legs trapped tight around my waist and her front to my back. My lips just hovering over her big toe.

“Hold still, this is supposed to be erotic.” I growl but she can’t hear me above her over the top wailing. I suck her toe between my lips and sweep my tongue over the pad and nail. I have done this before and all I have heard in return is deep sensual sighs. Ada sounds like I am flaying her alive. “Relax!” I say in my sternest tone. She is gasping and screaming, and I keep waiting for her to succumb. She is manically bucking behind me, shaking the lounger and scaring the wildlife. I try again, gentle sucking with my lips and licks of my tongue. More assertive grazing of my teeth but she is wound so tight, her face bright red with rage I think she might haemorrhage any moment, so I stop. I have to bite back a shit eating grin at her comical state of distress. Her hair has come loose, her skirt is screwed up around her waist and he bikini top is barely hanging on to the soft round flesh of her breasts. She roughly pulls her foot free when she feels my hold lighten.

“Don’t ever fucking do that again!” She snaps.

“Hard limit?” I joke and laugh at her narrow eyes and fiery glare.

“Hard fucking limit; put that right up there with the moulded latex fist you have in your toy chest…never…gonna…happen!” She bites back, fury flushing her cheeks an adorable pink hue.

“I thought you told Sheila, ‘Don’t knock it till you’ve tried it’?” I raise a brow and shrug at her incredulous expression. Yeah, it’s a small town.

Once I feel it’s safe to do so I slide up alongside her and scoop her into my lap. “So, about our ‘fuck only’ deal. We need to revise the parameters.” I turn my head when she tips hers to face me. My tone is serious enough but maybe she thinks I am joking and she wants to check the sincerity on my face. Her eyes crinkle with caution and she starts to worry her lip.

“We do?” Her tone is tinged with hope and I fucking love that. She has all these barriers but deep down, she yearns for the same thing I do. We just have to get over this next hurdle. This fucking enormous obstacle that she is standing guard to, with a shield, armour, and an AK47.

“I want more and I fucking know you do too; but, with so many secrets you and I both know this will never work.” I kiss the tip of her nose when she closes her eyes at my truth. My voice is softer, “I want this to work, Ada.” I run my hand through my hair and hold it out of my eyes. I don’t want anything to interfere with the look in her eyes reflecting mine. So much uncertainty, so much passion, desire and lust, hope and fire, longing and life. An endless ocean of tempered love just waiting…waiting for this…waiting for us. “I’ve been burnt really fucking badly too, but I’m willing to take that risk once more… for you.” I am glad I have her in my arms for this because she sags back into my hold and her eyes pool with liquid. “But I won’t do it unless you open up. I can’t blindly walk into a relationship again. Someone nearly died last time I did that. Someone I love and I’m not being dramatic here, Ada. Bethany was kidnapped because I let her sister, Kit, into my life without knowing the truth. I won’t risk that again. Especially when I know you
are
hiding shit.” I draw in a steadying breath. She is a ball of tension in my arms, and I can feel her fear and anxiety rolling off her in waves.

“Ethan, it’s not that I don’t want to tell you…I…I just can’t.” She looks devastated and I trace her hairline with my fingers, down her cheek along her jaw, and tip her chin so I can look deep into her eyes. She needs to see me.

“I didn’t say it was going to be easy, Ada, but aren’t the best things in life worth a bit of pain. You can do this–you will do this–and I know exactly how to help.” I flash her my most wicked grin. She giggles and relaxes.

“Oh, good, I don’t mind trying that game again. I love it when I win.” She mocks me and pinches my nipple to punctuate her point.

“When I let you win, you mean…But no, I am not going to extort information out of you through sexual means. We are going to do this old school.” I stand and walk into the living area. I hear her feet pad quietly on the floor behind me–little lamb to the slaughter. I turn and grin at the roll of her eyes.

“Tequila?” She purses her lips but a flash of worry skims her face. Oh, yes, this is going to work a treat.

“Tequila.” I confirm, flipping the bottle high in a spin, and catching it in a flurry. Buddy is not the only one who can mix a killer cocktail.

“OKAY…SO MAYBE
this wasn’t such a great idea?” Ethan takes the shot glass out of my reach and I slip from my perched position on the edge of the sofa to the floor in a fit of giggles. “You are such a lightweight, Ada.” He is starting to clear the salt and limes too, and I wave my objection frantically.

“Noooo…step away from the tequila pretty boy…step away.” I snatch the bottle back and hug it to me like it is my new best friend. It feels like it is; I have this warm swilling tingle inside, there is not an ounce of tension in my body, and absolutely everything is hilarious. “So, I’ve answered your questions, Ethan, now it’s your turn.” I narrow my eyes, more to focus on his ever moving frame than to try and highlight my attempt at stern seriousness.

“You’ve answered fuck all, Ada. Two glasses of wine with dinner and three shots…and let’s face it, you are having trouble forming actual sentences but fine I’ll answer your questions. What have you got?”

“Hmm,” I tap my numb lips and end up stroking my own cheek, because that feels numb too; it’s strangely addictive. “What’s with all the toys? You are fucking amazing without, so why have them…you soooo don’t need them.” I bite my lips and slap my hand to my mouth. I’m mortified that was in my head. That whole sentence was in my head. Oh, shit, his mouth curls in a wicked smile and he slowly draws his tongue along his bottom lip. It glistens with moisture and I swallow my own sudden dryness.

“I’m glad you think so.” His voice is low and husky, and I feel like my skin is flaming with colour. “But the toys are all about fun and they help when I don’t–”

I nod and my no-filter mouth joins in. “When you don’t actually fuck? Makes sense…I get it, no fucking and the toys will always finish the job…as it were?” I try to wink, but my face is not co-operating. I end up squishing my cheek up high with my finger tips to close one of my eyes. Yes, that worked a treat. “What do you do if the women don’t like your toy chest? It is both impressive and intimidating, hmm?”

“You weren’t intimidated?” He pours himself another shot and at my scowl pours a half shot for me. I scoff at his question.

“Yeah…that’s because my sex education was thorough, enlightening, and blinkered. My first time was amazing, but after that Cal’s mission in life was all about pleasure. ‘Listen to your body, Arti, and never be ashamed, Arti, nothing is wrong if it consensual, never be afraid to ask…never say no, Arti, especially to something you desire no matter how dark.” I list Cal’s mantra, or some of the variations at least, like it is imprinted in my soul. As much as I can’t bear to think about what he did that day he broke me, I can’t deny that what we had before that horrible day was nothing but pleasurable. I loved every minute.