Ethans Fal (23 page)

I KNEW SHE
would try to bolt. I could see it in her eyes, even as she closed them with the pleasure she felt sinking into the deep, soft mattress. The little frown etched on her forehead weighing up her desire for a good night sleep against whatever demon was going to stop her enjoying that comfort for whatever stupid reason. But she wasn’t comfortable and she had no intention of staying the night. I just don’t know why and it pisses me off that if I ask she will definitely run. She has avoided me all week because I tried to pry even a little personal information from her. I am sure she has her reasons. She doesn’t know me, so I will give her a little time. I will give her what she needs because she looked skittish and uncertain tonight. But I want her to think about her decisions, her choices, and maybe she will begin to question the barriers she has erected and just maybe, question who she lets through. She let Sky in on some of her secrets and Sky chose to announce that information to the whole damn bar. The way she spat it in my face like it was supposed to hurt me. She probably didn’t even notice Ada flinch at the back door trying to escape. Sky’s opportune disclosure had little to do with defending her friend and everything to do with me. I will talk to her. I hate this passive aggressive bullshit. Especially when Ada took the hit. She is probably feeling a little exposed, vulnerable. I want her exposed, but not like this. I want her wide open and quaking under my fingertips.

I want her to share her secrets but right now, I just want her safe and not sleeping on that bloody beach. So, I won’t push. She will trust me…she just doesn’t know it…yet.

“Cold?” I raise a brow and drag my eyes slowly up her fully dressed body. “Or do you just like wearing my clothes?”

“Um, no…Not cold, just…Shit!” She says quietly between her gritted teeth.

“So, you must be hungry then?” I quip, smiling at her frown and her awkward shuffle of my socks on the bare wood floor. Her lips are tight.

“No, it’s nothing. I’ll go back to bed.” She grumbles.

“Not that way, Ada.” She stops and has a look of suspicious confusion. “You may not trust me, but I
really
don’t trust you.” I step up to her and sweep her feet clear off the floor. She sinks into my hold and grabs her arms around my neck for safety. I like that involuntary reaction because it is pure instinct. She can fight it all she wants, she can deny it until the cows come home, but her body finds safety in my embrace and that is just what I want from her. I ignore the tightness in my gut at what that might mean. The feeling is not so foreign but it is unwelcome. I shake the thought. It doesn’t mean Jack. I just don’t want a young woman sleeping rough when I can do something about it. Carrying her into my bedroom and kicking my door shut, I throw her on the bed and she lands with a squeal. I stand looking down on her, she pulls her knees to her chest, and tucks her arms around her legs.

I cross my arms and wait. I am standing in just my boxer shorts and I can feel myself harden with every furtive glance she gives me.

“What?” she snaps with irritation. I don’t answer because that was a stupid question. “You want your clothes back, I take it?” She pulls at my oversized sweater.

“Very much so.” My voice sounds hoarse even to my ears and I cough to clear my throat. “But more than that, I want you to be comfortable, and I think you will be too hot if you don’t take some layers off. How much you discard is up to you…I know my preference would be for naked but the choice is yours.”

“I
choose
to leave.” She says the words but there is little conviction in them and I wonder why she is even fighting this.

“Angel,” my tone is soft but sure. “That is no longer a choice; now it’s late and we are both tired, so how about we get naked and snuggle.” I flash a grin and bite my lip. She sniffs at my attempt to lighten her mood.

“Snuggle?
You
want to snuggle?” She purses her lips and I slap my hand on my heart at her insinuation that I am being anything but sincere. She laughs this time and I slide next to her on the bed.

“We can snuggle. I will even stay on top of the covers if it helps. I bet you like a good snuggle.” My body is close but not touching. I am waiting for her to come to me, but I can feel the heat like little electrical currents jumping the tiny space between us.

“I do like a good hug…better than sex.” She replies quietly. A fierce red blush colours her cheeks and I can’t help stroke the soft skin with the back of my hand. So much for waiting for her to come to me.

“Really? Well, they must be pretty spectacular hugs because I thought sex with you was phenomenal.” The blush from her cheeks spreads to her neck and she pulls the sweater over her head to try and cool herself.

“Um, yes…it was. I mean…I just like hugs, normally. They are enough for me at least. I’m just surprised someone like you would settle for a snuggle.” Her brows raise with incredulity. I ignore her ‘someone like me comment’ because I can’t get my head around a hug being a replacement for sex.

“That must be some hug?” I repeat. I watch her shuffle her way out of my jeans, wiggle out of her socks. She keeps my T-shirt on. I pull a pillow across my lap because my cock knows she is naked under that shirt and as much as that is a distraction, I like that she is talking. Finally, telling me something that isn’t a lie or a smokescreen.

“I thought so too. Um…well…Buddy is a good hugger but the sex was…um–” I shift onto my side and scoot a little closer, enjoying her sudden shyness.

“Go on…the sex was?” My voice drops to a lower more sensual tone, and I can see the tiny hairs on her arms stand at attention. I just bet her nipples are doing the same damn thing. She bites her bottom lip and tenses trying to hold her ground at my encroaching frame. She huffs and turns her back to me, pulling the covers tight around her neck and slamming her arm against the quilt sealing herself in. I instantly lift the cover and slide in next to her heat. Big spoon just ready to scoop some of her sweetness. I slip my arm around her waist and under her T-shirt, the lure of her silky soft skin too much for my failing self-control. She only tenses for a moment, probably at the feel of my rock-hard erection wedged against her backside. But she relaxes just as quickly with a slight wriggle and a sigh that makes my balls ache.

“So, you want to snuggle?” she mocks with a light snort.

“No, Ada, I want to make you howl my name so loud, it wakes the whole damn block when you come, but I think we need to talk first.” I clarify.

“Oh, I’m definitely safe then.” She chuckles and fuck, if she doesn’t wriggle and push her tight little arse into my crotch. “I’m not talking so
we
won’t be
doing
anything to make me howl. Night, Ethan.” She gives one little roll of her hips but when I push back against her softness a whimper vibrates from deep in her chest. This is going to be a hellish night,but at least I’m not the only one with blue balls or whatever you call the female equivalent. We lay like this for maybe forty minutes until her breathing becomes soft and steady. I think she must be asleep because her body is so relaxed it moulds like liquid against mine. She whispers, “Are you asleep?”

“Does it feel like I’m asleep?” My ridged length painfully preventing any chance of actual sleep but I am resting, and it she feels too good to relinquish my hold. I roll my hips though just to ease a bit of the ache, a little sweet friction against her backside. I’ll take the discomfort over her sleeping in the spare room. She twists in my arms and hooks her leg over my hip and shuffles her scorching heat right against my cock.
Fuck!
Why did I say we needed to talk first? What was it we needed to talk about even? I don’t think it was important–No definitely not important. “Ada.” My tone is a warning but my hand slides to cup her arse and hold her firm against me. God, she feels like she’s on fire. Her teasing little movements are hot and wet against me, they’re too much. I roll her onto her back and pin her arms above her head. I push her legs wide and it is now just the thin cotton of my shorts preventing me from fucking that smug grin right off her face.

“I don’t want to fuck you, Ada.” I growl and bite back the frustration pouring through me, because I want that so much; but it will just complicate this further.

“Yes, I can feel that.” Her hips twitch and her body shivers with anticipation. “But I have to be at work early, and I can’t sleep with your cock wedged against my arse playing the abstinence game. It’s a little late in the day to try and be all honourable, don’t you think?” Her tone is curt and it feels harsh. I pitch up on my arms still pressing her wrists into the mattress. Her leather bands in one arm shift and I see some numbers in black ink on the inside of her wrist. The dark numbers on her pale wrist look strangely familiar.

“It’s you, isn’t it?” I hold her gaze as she tries to work out what I mean, but her lips lock tight like the answer could be any number of things. “The paintings in my bar; Sheila’s nudes, they are all you, aren’t they?” She relaxes underneath me and I am intrigued at what she thought I meant. We definitely need to talk.

“Sheila keeps the secret not me, what of it?” Her voice is prickly and defensive.

“Nothing…not a damn thing. They are stunning…Sheila has almost done this body justice. I just didn’t know.”

“Why would you? Look, this discussion about art, I am more than happy to talk about tomorrow. But right now can we…um you know…fuck?” She bites her lips together and the blush on her cheeks is adorable.

“No, but I won’t leave you hanging because I’m a nice guy.” I nip at her ear lobe but she tenses for the first time below me. “What…you don’t want to come?”

“Not if that’s all that’s on the table… I can do
that
myself.” She fights to break free like I have really pissed her off.

“And your problem with that is what exactly?” I raise my brows because she is curious and hot, and her wriggling is morphing from feisty to furious, which isn’t helping my hard-on.

“I thought Sky was joking, but she was serious,” she pauses and fixes me with dark narrowed eyes. Her exasperated breath is pushed in a puff of frustration out of her perfects lips but her eyes darken with desire.

“I don’t shit where I eat, so no I don’t fuck anyone local. I do everything but that–fucking complicates things.”

“Why? Do you have a magic dick or something? Press a button inside some women and they can’t see straight, is that it? God, you are so full of it!” I bark out a deep laugh at her righteous indignation.

“I’m glad you think so. I have my reasons and they work pretty well. No one gets hurt and everyone has a good time.”

“You’ve never fucked anyone here?” Her brows knit together and I don’t like where this might be going.

“I have fucked lots of ‘ones’ here and some ‘twos’, still working on the threes, but they have all been transient travellers.” She scowls at my flippancy and I berate myself at the pain that flashes across her face.

“I’m not transient. I live here.” She pushes against my hold and I release her.

“Which is why I won’t fuck you again. I broke my own rule with you Ada, but I’m not interested in a relationship. Like it or not, most women see more into fucking than I can offer. This works for me and I see no reason to change. I don’t need complicated.”

“Preaching to the choir, Ethan. That is the last thing I want but the intimacy is a different level of pleasure and I’m just listening to my body. I like your dick, so if that’s not on the table I’ll go back to the hugs from Buddy.
Absolutely
no complications there.” She pushes once more and I roll to her side.

“You say intimacy, I hear complicated.” She holds my gaze and worries her lips between her teeth as she processes her internal dialogue. Christ, I wish she would just tell me what she’s so afraid of, at least I have told her my concern. Upfront.

“You mistake intimacy for love; this isn’t love.” She waves her finger between our bodies. “This is just biology, my body wanting yours. Nature doing its
thing,
so please don’t confuse me with one of your love-struck groupies who sees hearts and roses and happily ever afters in that gorgeous smile you wield like a weapon.” Her voice is too soft to hear clearly, she mumbles when she turns away from me and gazes at the ceiling. Her words are unclear but maybe sounded something like, not deserving …something or could have been not believing in
happy-ever afters
.