Elemental Light (Paranormal Public Book 9) (28 page)

“It’ll keep you from talking for a bit at least,” said Lough, pulling no punches.

Sip looked like she was about to say something, but before she could get a word out Lough shoved a muffin into her hands.

“See?” he offered.

She rolled her eyes and took a bite. Professor Dacer, who’d been looking at maps with Trafton, came around the counter.

“Martha made those,” he said, propping his face on his hand. “But we’re going to run out of food soon. Trafton’s been sneaking in and out of Public, but it won’t be long before that avenue is discovered and closed.”

When no one responded to the gloomy predication, Dacer turned his attention to me. “Charlotte? There’s someone here who would like to speak to you. And while I’m at it, Sipythia, if I might have a word?”

Sip’s eyebrows shot upward. Lough was still openly afraid of Dacer and his colorful nail polish, so I wasn’t surprised when he stayed in the background. I was pretty sure that deep down, he felt that he didn’t measure up to someone so comfortable in his own skin. But Sip and Dacer had never talked much either, so I wondered what Dacer wanted with her now.

“Who wants to speak with me?” I asked.

“He’s in the sitting room,” said Dacer. “Be kind.” It was strange request coming from Dacer, but his tone made it clear that he wasn’t going to explain, so I got up and headed for the door, with Dacer a few steps behind me. Sip grabbed a second muffin before hurrying after us.

I went to the sitting room, wondering who else could possibly want to see me, and especially why Dacer would be worried about how I’d treat someone. In general I would rather have gone to sleep, which I might have managed with Sip back and my worries about her safety allayed for the moment. But that didn’t seem like it was going to be an option.

Despite my puzzlement, I wasn’t surprised in the end to see Professor Zervos waiting for me in the sitting room. The vampire professor had folded his long body into a teal-colored armchair, only a little darker, but much cleaner, than the outfit I still had on from our night at the Circle. He was sitting as close to the fire as he could get without risk of being consumed, or lit on fire himself. His salt and pepper hair looked a little thinner than I remembered it, and suddenly I was relieved that Dacer had taken Sip away. My werewolf friend hated Zervos with a passion, and she probably would have said something angry and inappropriate.

Professor Zervos barely turned his head when I entered.

“Alright?” he asked softly, still staring at nothing.

I looked around the room. It looked unused, with the heavy drapes pulled back and tied as if they were never let down, and a collection of dust on the furniture.

“What?” I asked, moving into the room. I wasn’t sure whether to sit or stand, but Zervos didn’t appear to care either way. “I’m fine,” I said.

“Good,” he said. “I thought as much. You always do end up fine, don’t you?”

I wasn’t sure that was true, but I had never seen Zervos like this. He was thoughtful and sad. I had always thought the darkness inside him ruled, that even if he pretended to be on the side of the paranormals, he didn’t act like he cared very much.

Glancing at his finger, I saw that his ring was still blood red. So he hadn’t been forced into one of the Turning ceremonies, yet. Keller, telling me to come in two days, had referred to the next Black Ring Ceremony.

He saw me looking and smiled thinly.

“No, I haven’t sworn allegiance, if that’s what you’re wondering,” he said. He paused and glanced out the window. “That’s what the Black Ring Ceremony’s for.”

I pursed my lips.

“Why are they having you do it?” I said.

“It is to celebrate the glorious darkness,” said Zervos sarcastically.

“I thought only darkness mages were Nocturns.”

Zervos shrugged. “They’ve expanded it to include any paranormal who wants to join.” He said “join” as if it was something evil, which was hard to believe coming from him. “With the demon council and the
Premier, their governing structure is getting more complex, while ours crumbles.”

“So, after the
Black Ring Ceremony, then what happens?” I asked.

Zervos raised his black eyebrows. “To me, you mean? Do you really care?” His voice lilted a little, like he appreciated the thought or found it funny in some way.

“Why are you here?” I asked softly. “You’ve always hated me and my friends.”

Zervos pushed himself up onto his feet so fast I rocked backward, but I didn’t have time to take a single step away from the vampire before he was standing in front of me with his cold, pale hand wrapped around my throat. I felt each individual finger squeezing my neck, the air leaving my lungs. I’d never been this close to him before, I’d never smelled the faint tint of blood or musty cushions. I’d never looked into his fathomless black eyes and wondered that there was nothing behind them. We were nose to nose as he gently laid the back of my head to rest against the wall.

I tried to swallow, but his fingers only closed more tightly around my life.

“Because you are the only thing standing between light, and darkness’s obliteration of light. And it depresses me,” Zervos hissed, a bit of saliva spewing from his lower lip to land on my cheek. My hand twitched to wipe it away, but Zervos wouldn’t let me move. I could barely breathe, and under no circumstances could I look away.

Clenching my hand at my side, I willed myself to listen.

“I’m about to give my life,” said Zervos, his voice low and dangerous, “and I’m not doing it for some grandiose cause or some fated ideal.” He gave a razor sharp smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “I’m doing it for you,” he whispered, his voice dropping so low I almost couldn’t hear it, my heart dropping with it. “Guilt and loyalty can drive the world. They are almost as potent as love, sometimes more so, since love is so often a mere sliver of what it truly could be.”

I opened my mouth, my lips moving to form an “O,” but no sound came out. Pure shock at what he was telling me suffused my veins and rose through me like smoke rising through the air. My hairline tickled with the realization of what he was telling me.

“Oh, yes,” he said, seeing the understanding in my eyes. “This isn’t something that you can keep at arm’s reach. This is real.”

I found my courage and moved my fist. Bracing it against his chest, I shoved with all my might. It was difficult, because his arm was in the way, more so because his hand was still fastened like a zipper around my throat. At first our bodies moved together, his falling backward and mine falling forward. He stumbled and righted himself, in the process releasing my neck.

I glared at him and shoved him again. He made no move to stop me, but I saw something spark in his eyes.

“Very well,” he said. “Very well.”

“Don’t ever touch me again,” I rasped. “For anything.”

Zervos stared at me for a moment.

“I didn’t think you would ever do,” he whispered. “Once you were discovered, I thought you’d get a hero’s welcome. I thought you’d be some spoiled brat, or that a paranormal would kill you. They didn’t spoil you, because they were too afraid of what you meant, and they didn’t kill you
. . .” He paused and cocked his head to the side. I waited for him to continue, and when he didn’t I said, “Well?”

“They didn’t kill you for the same reason,” he finished.

“If they were so afraid of my dying, why did they kill all the other elementals?” I demanded. “No one seems very afraid of me at this point.”

“True,” said Zervos. “You are not what anyone would call fearsome, but ghosts” - he shook his head - “ghosts scare all paranormals if they know what’s good for them. They are impossible to kill and they always have a touch of the insane.”

“Fine,” I said. “Ghosts are bad and there are a lot of elemental ghosts somewhere, but you still haven’t explained what you’re doing here.”

“Ms. Quest might lead the Sign of Six and Lisabelle Verlans might have sacrificed her humanity to save the only two friends she will ever have,” said Zervos, “but neither of them can save the paranormals. Only you can do that. Like I said, this is not a large war, it is a small war with large consequences, because the war comes down to you.”

“The Mirror Arcane,” I started, but Zervos became angry again. He threw up his hands and brought them toward me as if he was about to strike me again, but at the last moment he remembered himself. His eyes bulged and I thought it was entirely possible that he’d start frothing at the mouth.

“The Mirror Arcane is NOTHING,” he bellowed. “It doesn’t matter! You are what makes it matter! The fact that you’ve never understood that has baffled me! It doesn’t surprise me that the others are so set in their ways, that they are so concerned with that power, but you have never thought outside of that particular box. YOU SHOULD KNOW BETTER.”

He stepped away from me, but I could see that he was still vibrating with rage. I’d held my ground, but barely, staring at him in shock. I had no idea what he was saying.

He watched me closely, and he could see the confusion in my eyes. He gave an exasperated noise.

“It is not for me to tell you,” he said. “If I tell you, then you will never do what you must. I hope that should you find the right place, and the right way, you will understand what I am asking, nay, telling you must be done.”

Chapter Twenty-Six

Finally, totally drained, I headed upstairs to my room, moving slowly, resting my hand on the banister as I went, more to feel that it was real than for support. My arm couldn’t take my weight at this point anyway. My body had reached a state beyond tired, where I walked in a sort of dream realm in which I felt both physically and mentally beaten up.

There was a slight sense of relief, a drop of cooling calm in an ocean of fire that was my mind when I walked into my own room.

It felt like I had never left, except that there was the faint smell a room takes on when it’s left empty for too long, a sort of dusty musk.  My mind kept flitting between Keller and Zervos and wishing I could stop thinking about both of them and just fall into an oblivious sleep. I still hadn’t processed what had happened with my mother, the Black Ring ceremonies, or the fact that I’d really escaped and been brought back to Astra.

Barely able to keep my eyes open, I collapsed onto my bed and fell into an uneasy sleep. Luckily, I didn’t dream. Instead, I felt someone come into the room. I had no idea how long I’d been out, but I wanted them to go away immediately and let me get back to resting.

“What was that?” the voice asked.

I mumbled something else unintelligible.

“I wanted to see you,” said Keller.

I felt the bed depress next to me and sprang awake as if I was about to be run over by a wild band of vampire horses. I tumbled away from Keller, who was eyeing me with something dangerously close to amusement. Dangerous for him, because saying I was tired and grumpy was an understatement akin to saying that Lisabelle was only a little scary. I jumped out of bed and glared at him.

“That took you a while,” said Keller. He was braced on my bed, not getting up or moving any closer to me. He still wore black and looked thin and tired, but some of his aloof air was gone.

I’d come into the room sweaty and planning to shower, but I hadn’t had the energy, and now, not only was I an incredibly dirty elemental, but I was an incredibly dirty, rumpled elemental. I just stared at him.

“Well, I’m apparently very popular,” I muttered. “You know I haven’t slept in days?”

“You were just sleeping,” he pointed out.

“Sort of.” I said, glaring at him, suddenly embarrassed that he had seen me in such a condition. When we were dating it was one thing, but we weren’t anymore. My stomach clenched and I fought the urge to sit down.

“What happened to you?” I asked. I’d been wanting to ask for long enough, and I wasn’t going to tiptoe around it anymore. My boyfriend, my first love, had disappeared without a backward glance, and now here he was again, acting as if nothing remarkable had happened that was worth mentioning.

But I wanted to know why. Asking also kept me steady and got my mind off the fact that Keller and I were alone in my bedroom.

He sighed and sat up, lacing his fingers in his lap.

“I had hoped not to talk about all of that right now,” he said quietly.

“To my mind,” I said, taking a slow step toward him, “there isn’t anything else to talk about.”

He ran a frustrated hand through his black hair.

“It’s just that we always forgot about problems when we were together,” he said. “It was wonderful.”

“Yes,” I said, taking another tentative step, “but it wasn’t real. We can’t have a relationship where everything is roses and lilies or whatever. The fighting, the battles, that’s real.”

“Love is real too,” he said quietly. I met his eyes, but I didn’t understand what I saw in their depths.

“I know,” I said. “Where have you been?”

Keller stood up to pace. “You don’t understand,” he said desperately. I watched him, relieved at the show of emotion. “The lines between good and evil have never been so complicated. Demons, they’re evil, fallen angels, they’re good, but you of all paranormals should know that there’s no such thing as all good or all bad. Lisabelle proves that. She should be the
Darkness Premier, given how much black power she has coursing through her veins, but she isn’t, is she?”