Edge of the Past (21 page)

I gave her a little smile. “Skating by myself… it made me pretty emotional.”

Liza loosened her laces and tugged off one of her boots. “I wish I could’ve skated as great as you did.”

“We all have rough performances sometimes. I’ve sure had plenty of them. You just have to learn from it and then put it behind you.”

“But I wanted to show everyone what I could do. I wanted Sergei to be proud of me,” she said quietly.

Her disappointment brought fresh tears to my eyes. It was sweet how much she already looked up to Sergei, and I could identify with her wanting to impress him.

“He’s proud of you for just getting out there and trying your best.”

“He told me that, but… he’s such a good coach, and all his students are so good.”

“He’s so happy you’re here that it doesn’t matter how you skate. I mean, he wants you to do well, but how you perform doesn’t make him any less excited or proud to be your father.”

Liza chewed on her lip. “I hope I don’t have to go back to Russia. I asked Elena if we were staying, and she said she hasn’t decided. I don’t wanna leave you and Sergei.”

My heart swelled, and a stronger rush of tears choked me. No matter what hang-ups I had about the situation, I couldn’t deny that Liza belonged here. I had to find a way to get over my fears because having Liza and Elena with us permanently really did make sense. I put my arm around Liza’s shoulders and hugged her to my side.

“We don’t want you to leave either.”

****

“My head is so heavy,” Elena said, sinking deeper under her blanket. “I not go to Boston today.”

Judging from the congestion in her voice, Elena had definitely caught Liza’s cold. “What about Liza?” I asked. “We won’t be gone long. I just have to pick up a few things from my parents’ house after Louann’s.”

“No, she not go.”

“Sergei’s at the rink, so she doesn’t have anything else to do today. You could rest while she’s gone.”

“Please, please, please?” Liza snuck into the doorway with her hands clasped together.

Elena rubbed her throat and closed her eyes. I wasn’t sure if she was dismissing us by going to sleep. Liza rested her bandaged chin on her hands and stared at the bed. I turned to leave, but Elena slowly opened her eyes.

“Okay,” she said.

Liza hopped up and down, and I nodded thanks to Elena. “We’ll be back around lunch.”

“Liza, you have my phone number in your backpack?” Elena asked. “You use Emily’s phone to call if you need me.”

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. We were going to Boston, not the other side of the country.

Liza grabbed her bag, and we were soon on our way with the rest of the morning commuters. I felt excited to have some time with Liza without Elena judging my every move. We spent the entire car ride talking about Liza’s favorite books, and I got to reminisce about the ones I’d read as a kid. I promised to give her some of my old books from my parents’ house when we stopped there.

We reached Brookline mid-morning and parked in my parents’ empty driveway. “Your mom and dad aren’t home?” Liza asked.

“They have early classes on Fridays. Don’t worry, I have a key.” I smiled. “Let’s get to Louann’s first and then we’ll go in the house when we come back.”

Finding a parking spot in downtown Boston would’ve been impossible that time of day, so I’d opted to take the T. It would also give me a chance to show Liza more of the city.

We walked along the tree-shaded sidewalk, and Liza gazed at the Victorian style homes on both sides of the street. “This reminds me of my neighborhood in New York. Did Elena tell you we’re gonna go visit my friends at my old rink after Worlds?”

“No, she didn’t.” I assumed Sergei hadn’t been told yet either. “That’s really cool.”

“I can’t wait to see my friend, Hope. I miss her
so
much. And my coach said she’ll give me a few lessons while I’m there.”

“I bet everyone’s going to be so excited to see you.”

“I’m excited to see
them
!” Liza did a little skip.

We turned from the residential area onto the commercial block, and I told Liza how my friends and I would ride our bikes to all the shops.

She pointed at Brookline Booksmith. “Ooh, we have to go in there!”

I grinned. “My favorite spot of all. We can stop for a minute on our way back.”

I stayed close to Liza’s side as we crossed busy Beacon Street and waited on the median at the Coolidge Corner T stop. We’d missed most of the crowd leaving for work, so only a few people stood with us. Liza continued to look all around at the stores and restaurants, and she curved her neck up toward the big clock above the corner drugstore.

“That’s pretty,” she said.

“Yeah, the building looks like something you’d see in Germany.”

“I remember when you and Chris skated in Germany two years ago. You won gold.”

I tapped the top of her head with my finger. “You have a good memory.”

The Green Line C train approached from the right and rumbled to a stop, and I dropped in the exact change for the fare. Twenty minutes later we were at the Boylston station and after a quick walk, Louann’s shop.

While I put on my new dress to make sure the final adjustments worked, Louann let Liza try on a few of the off-the-rack costumes. Liza and I both twirled in front of the big mirror, making skating poses and giggling, and I thought about Aubrey saying, “You could be the cool stepmom
.”
Was I capable of being more than that?

My cell phone rang, and when I saw the caller, I dampened my laughter before answering.

“Hi, Elena.”

“I want to check if Liza is okay,” she croaked.

“She’s great. We should be leaving the shop in a few minutes.”

I shook my head as Elena said a few words and then ended the call. Liza picked up another costume she wanted to try on, but I didn’t want to dawdle much longer at Louann’s if we were going to browse the bookstore. I asked Liza to change into her clothes, and she gave me a frown but complied.

Sunny Boston Common and the picturesque Public Garden called to me from across Boylston Street, and I wished I had more time to take Liza on a stroll. But Elena would probably call again if we ran just a few minutes behind schedule. I led Liza into the train station, and we rode the escalator down to the underground platform.

A train was waiting on the tracks, and Liza jumped from the last step of the escalator. “Let’s catch it before it leaves!” she said, running toward the open doors.

“Liza, wait!” I cried as I noticed the digital sign on the train read
D–Riverside
. It wasn’t the C line we needed.

Liza kept running and I took off after her, but two people cut in front of me, blocking my path. As I dodged them, I watched Liza hop onto the subway and turn around to look for me.

And then the doors closed.

Chapter Twenty

No! No! No!

I lurched forward and banged on the door with my fist, but the train pulled away with Liza inside watching me with terror in her eyes.

No!

I fumbled with my costume bag and stumbled away from the track as the train disappeared into the dark tunnel. I’d experienced sickening fear at competitions, but nothing like this. My entire body clenched, paralyzed by cold horror. A few people on the platform gave me understanding looks, and I couldn’t do anything except stare at them as my mind raced.

What should I do? Call the police? Get on the next train and hope Liza’s waiting at the next stop?

The second option sounded the best. Liza was a smart kid. She’d know to exit the train and wait for me… right?

I squeezed the cross on my necklace as I bobbed up and down and gazed down the tunnel for the next train. What was taking so long? Minute after minute ticked by with nothing but eerie silence from the track.

The subsequent squealing of metal on metal was the most beautiful sound I’d ever heard. A gust of air blew into the station along with the train, and I boarded the moment the doors opened, staying close to the doorway. I needed Liza to see me right away.

I prayed every second of the ride and used my shaky hands to grip the handrail, bracing myself for the stop.
Please, God, let Liza be there.

We emerged from the darkness and into the station, and I darted my eyes across the platform, yearning to see a little girl with a purple backpack. My stomach plummeted as only adult faces watched the train screech to a stop.

I pressed my palm to my sweaty forehead.
What do I do now? Stay on the train? No, this is the B line!

I rushed through the doors and into the dank station. Would Liza have gone up to the street?
No, no, you’re not thinking clearly.

I stood on the mostly empty platform with my hand on my head, forcing myself to focus while my pulse sprinted faster and faster. I had to call the transit police. They could start looking out for Liza at all the D line stops.

Another train roared into the station, and the
D
on the digital sign made me pause with my fingers around my phone. I could board and look for Liza myself. But what if she was in trouble? Fear tightened its hold on me, and I shuddered.

My phone showed no bars. I pounded it against my palm, trying to shake a connection into it. When my throat began to ache with tears, I took a few deep breaths and made a quick decision. I ran to the train and hurried inside to the front.

“Excuse me!” I rushed up to the conductor. “Can you call the police? My fiancé’s daughter got separated from me and she’s on another train.”

The man turned his weathered face toward me. “Which one is she on?”

“The last D that left Boylston.”

He adjusted his glasses and picked up his radio. “I need a description.”

“Nine years old, black hair, blue eyes, umm… umm… carrying a purple backpack.”

“Name?” he asked as he pressed a button on the radio.

“Liza. Liza Overett.”

The driver called in the information along with my name and cell number as he guided the train out of the station. I tapped my foot, hoping for immediate confirmation of the search effort.

“They put out an alert,” he said.

“Thank you,” I said and slid over to a window seat to keep watch for Liza.

We traveled underground through three stations before rising to street level. I squinted at the sunshine and looked down at the phone still in my hand. Four bars showed now.
I should’ve given Liza my number.
Then she’d have it with her when the police found her. And I’d thought Elena was ridiculous for giving Liza hers.

Elena.

When she found out about this, she was never going to let me take Liza anywhere ever again. And maybe I didn’t deserve the chance. Why hadn’t I held her hand? Tears stung my eyes, and I hugged the garment bag to my chest. Liza was probably so scared. I
had
to get to her.

My phone rang, and I jumped at the sound. I stopped breathing when I saw the caller.

Sergei.

I stared at the phone, unable to bring myself to answer. How would I tell him I’d lost his daughter? After the ringing stopped, the message notification chimed. I dialed my voicemail and listened to Sergei’s happy voice.

Hey, I hope you and Liza are having a great time.
If
anyone can make her smile after her rough night, it’s you.
Call me later and we can make a plan for dinner. I love you.

I disconnected and struggled to keep my face from crumpling.
You have to hold it together.

The train seemed to be moving slower than any subway I’d ever ridden in my life. I wanted to get out and run the rest of the way. If Liza wasn’t at any of the stops, had she gone all the way to the end of the line in Riverside? Hadn’t the driver of her train been alerted? Why hadn’t the police found her yet?

My eyes hurt from straining to scour each stop through the window. Thirty minutes had gone by. We were getting farther away from the city, and I had no idea if I was even getting closer to Liza. Every minute that passed made me feel more ill. So many people rode the T, including some who might prey on a lost little girl. The thought of someone approaching Liza, wanting to harm her… I shivered again and rocked back and forth in my seat.
God, please
watch over her. Please keep her safe.

My ringtone sounded, zapping me with a ray of hope, and the Boston area code on the screen further raised my excitement. I slapped the phone to my ear and answered in a rush.

“Emily Butler?” the man asked.

“Yes!”

“This is Officer Ben Cager with the MBTA Police. We found Liza.”

The heaviness sitting on my chest lifted and released a flood of tears. I threw my head back and looked up at the roof, silently sending a long stream of thanks to God.

The officer explained Liza was with him at the Packards Corner Station on the B line. The D train she’d originally boarded had to be taken out of service at Kenmore, so she’d transferred to the B train, thinking it would take her to Brookline. If I’d stayed on the first train I tried, I would’ve caught up to her!

I realized I needed to get off the T before I ended up deeper in the suburbs. At the next stop, I hopped off and arranged to meet Officer Cager and Liza two stops back. While I waited for the next inbound train, the policeman would drive Liza to Beaconsfield Station.

When I reached Beaconsfield, I ran up the steep stairs to the street and breathlessly swerved my head in both directions. An officer stepped out of a blue and white police car and opened the rear door, and I sprinted toward him as Liza slid out of the back seat.

“Liza!” I dropped the garment bag onto the ground and pulled Liza into my arms.

She sobbed quietly on my shoulder, and I started weeping again. Never had I been so happy and relieved to see someone. I ran a soothing hand over Liza’s silky hair while keeping one arm clamped firmly around her back. I didn’t want to let her go.

Liza clung to my neck and gasped through her sobs. “I’m so sorry.”