Dust (Of Dust and Darkness) (29 page)

BOOK: Dust (Of Dust and Darkness)
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I count ninety-two laps before Jack returns with provisions. I’m practically drooling as I watch him unpack a canteen of butternut squash soup, two yeast rolls, strawberries and bananas covered in some sort of red glaze, and a cup of mixed nuts.

             
“Try to eat it all sometime today. I want you as nourished and energized as possible when it’s time to go.”

             
Eat all that? No flippin’ problem!
I practically knock him off his feet to get to the smorgasbord. I head straight for the roll, tearing off a piece and letting it dissolve on my tongue.
“Your sister really knows how to make good bread. Definitely one thing I’ll miss around here.”

             
Chuckling, he teases, “The food is all you’re going to miss?”

             
Squatting on the ground, I gum another piece of bread before I find the courage to meet his eyes and answer. “No. I’ll miss you most of all. I wouldn’t even be alive if you hadn’t been assigned to watch over me. So I guess I should thank you for that.”

             
His smile is weak. Maybe he meant that question to be rhetorical. Or maybe he thought I wouldn’t have the courage to mention him in my
response
. Either way, he seems a little uncomfortable with my answer. And here I thought we were finally moving past that.

             
“Thank me when I get you out of here. Which won’t be easy. I’ve got some serious research and planning to do.”

             
His wings flutter and I jump to my feet, a swarm of bees suddenly stinging my insides as I gasp. “Wait! You’re leaving again?”

             
“Yeah. I can’t plan your escape here, Rosalie. I need to observe the spriggans’ routines, gather supplies for your journey, then figure out how I’m going to get a pixie past spriggans and faeries without drawing attention. I’ve got a lot to do and I want you safely out of here in a week.”

             
A week! Can he even do all that in a week?

             
“So when will I see you again?” I ask, fighting hard to hide the panic screaming within.

             
“Rosalie, I’ll still come by each morning and evening to give you rations and fresh buckets. I wish I could be here all day with you, but I just can’t right now. But don’t worry. Chances are slim anyone’s going to show up to give you a hard time. Just keep building up your leg strength.”

             
I feel a slight tremble in my limbs when he steps toward me and embraces me in a light hug.
Man, three inches difference sucks when we stand!
 
He
curls to
rest his chin atop my head, and I place my
forehead
just below his
chest.
Thump, thump, thump
his heart goes. As I wrap my arms slowly around his hips, I swear
the thumping
speed
s
up slightly.

             
For once the butterflies aren’t madly flapping around in my abdomen, but lightly flittering in place, as if dazed as much as I am right now. W
ho would’ve thought his hold w
ould have such a calming effect on me?

             
“Just think, Rosalie.”

             
“Hmm?” I murmur.

             
“In a week you’ll be stepping on dirt and grass and breathing in fresh air. Taking baths in a river instead of splashing yourself with water in a bucket. And you can eat whatever you can forage.”

             
But I won’t have you
, I think. Because you’re not going to leave your family and your home to be with me. I know that I should push my way out of his grasp and begin the process of breaking away, sparing my heart of further longing for something unattainable…but I just can’t. Not yet.

 

 
 

My legs are a little stiff from everything I’ve put them through the past several days. I’ve made three-thousand, two hundred and sixty-five passes around my hole – yeah, I counted…it keeps me from focusing all my attention on the fullness of Jack’s lips, the wavy hair as brown as the bark on a weeping willow, his hypnotizing mossy green eyes, his…
Dang it!

             
Yesterday began my new ritual of leg squats. I didn’t really understand what they were until Jack demonstrated them – most fae don’t bother strengthening their legs, since it’s our wings that really support our weight. Now I regret taking these on. My legs have never ached so much in my life! And it’s awkward to sit on the floor and stretch them out without poking myself with a rocky protuberance. Walking continuous circles helps, but I still feel the pull
when
I overextend my step.

             
So I’ve been a complete chicken when it comes to looking at my wings. I couldn’t resist a fearful peek that first day. What I saw was devastating. Today when I find the courage to peek again, my heart continues to break. The outer cartilage that keeps my wings strong and shaped is completely mangled, with so many breaks I dare not count. The intricate pattern of veins and crossveins is completely shredded, and I fear they’ll never align and heal to their former glory. How can I move forward without wings? The magic coursing through our wings define who the fae are. Am I to be the only pixie in my Hollow doomed to walk the forest floor the rest of my years? Never tiptoe across the forest canopy or walk on water again? I glance at my wings and fear the answer is yes. If I ever considered myself an outsider amongst pixies before, I’m sure a lack of wings will put a permanent stamp on it.
Caution – this pixie broken in every way possible.

             
Lifting my spirits, I grin ear to ear when I see what Jack brings me to eat today. Roasted and salted cucumber seeds! I pop a few into my mouth and
moan
. I know they’re delectable, but they’re too mild in flavor for my taste buds to pick up on. I really hope that returns soon. I don’t want to live the rest of my life eating tasteless calories, or having to put something extremely pungent on my food just to catch a whiff of flavor.

             
“So I brought something for you to look at.”

             
That piques my curiosity as I grab a piece of sourdough bread to pick at. Jack pulls a piece of aged parchment from his satchel and unfolds it six times, revealing a large drawing done by hand. He sits beside me so we can look on together. I’m in awe over what I see: a map displaying the location of a ton of Hollows, the rivers that flow through our lands and the trails that seem to connect us all. By the wear on the paper and aged edges, this drawing could have been made hundreds of years ago, so I have the distinct feeling Jack isn’t supposed to have this in his possession.

             
“So many Hollows. I never dreamed there were so many!” Elm, Ash, Lauralyn, Willow, Cedar – the Hollows are endless on this piece of parchment, and each depicted with the drawing of the pixie in the correct skin-tone in front of their corresponding tree type. I see my Hollow, Holly’s (Ash) and Juniper’s (Birch). Funny…I don’t see Willow’s color depicted anywhere on here. “I always
knew
there were more of us out there, especially since some disappeared,” I pause at that, wondering how many were enslaved and didn’t leave at their own volition, “but I never thought there would be so many Hollows.”

             
“I wonder why your own Hollow didn’t tell you that.”

             
“I don’t know. Maybe they thought a lot more pixies would leave in search of them if they knew. Where are we on this map right now?”

             
“Well, it only shows pixies, but my best guess is right around here,” he says, poking his finger
at the forest
on the left side of the map, far from any Hollow.

             
“Oh, wow,” I cheerlessly reply, assessing the distance between here and my Hollow. “I don’t know what the distance scale is on this map, but that looks like a long way to go on foot.”

             
“It is,” he says, sighing. “About a hundred and fifty kilometers I think.”

             
“A hundred and fifty kilometers!” I scream. “Might as well make it a million! I can’t walk that!”

             
“I’m thinking you won’t have to. Look,” he says gently, motioning me to follow his finger as it traces the map. “There’s a river that flows most of the way. You’ll have to walk quite a ways to get there, but your legs will be as fresh as they can be. Follow this trail until it bends and keep walking straight through the forest to hit the river. Once you’re there, make a raft and travel all the way to here, right before the waterfall. Then you’ll have to pick up on this trail to take you the rest of the way. It’s definitely going to take some time getting there on foot, but it’s not impossible, Rosalie.”

             
Mother Nature, that’s far
. I hide it well, but I’m already feeling a little defeated inside. And that’s just the traveling part. I’ll still have to forage for food, find safe places to rest –
be
cause without wings, I could very well end up an easy meal for some carnivore hunting in the woods. Then there’s those monstrous beasts guarding the prison.

             
“What about the spriggans? Will they come after me?”

             
“Best guess…
” he
says
,
pausing to think as he absently rubs his chin and squints
his eyes
.

P
robably. Finley won’t be able to risk you telling any Hollow that they’ve been swiping pixies for slave labor. And I’m not going to lie, Rosalie. Spriggans are pretty dumb, but they know how to survive…and track. Once you’re in the river, I don’t think they’ll be able to pick up your scent, but I suggest any time you’re in the forest, smear your skin with any kind of scented flower you can find. And change it often so they won’t know what to follow. But never for one second think you’re safe. Always be looking over your shoulder and be suspicious of anything your instincts are picking up on.”

             
I can’t help but dwell on the number of times he uses the words your or you’re. .
You’re
going to have to find
your
way.
You’re
going to have to find shelter and food. You, you, you. Not a single
we’re
in the bunch.

             
I really am going to have to do this on my own.

             
I release a long, deep sigh. This is suddenly becoming very real, and dangerous. A lot will have to go right in order for me to get home again. But part of me feels dead inside, because in order to get Poppy and my fellow pixies back, I’ll have to give up Jack, who now means more to me than any of them. Sans Poppy…I think it
would
sadden me as much to lose her permanently too.

             
“Well, getting out of this cave will be easy enough. What about the prison boundary itself? Last time I ran smack into the spriggans’ campsite. Where’s the best place to get out of here unnoticed?”

             
“Not possible.”

             
My chest sinks. “Not possible?”

             
“What I mean is that it’s not possible to avoid their campsite. It doesn’t matter which direction you choose to go in. Once you pass through the barrier, the magic automatically dumps you at the edge of their campsite.”

             
“Well,” I huff. “That’s….crap.”

             
Amused, Jack huffs too. “I figure our best bet is to pass through around two in the morning. The spriggans should long be asleep and after watching them the last couple of nights, they don’t seem to have anyone stay up and stand guard.”

             
“Why would they? I’m the only one that’s ever tried to escape and I did it in the morning light right under their noses. Those pixies can’t get out of that pit. Even if we had stood on one another’s shoulders, there aren’t enough of us strong enough to climb that high.”

             
“Yeah,” he replies, folding up the map and stowing it away in his satchel again. “Well, I hate to watch you eat and run, but I’ve still got some things to plan out.”

             
Slightly annoyed, I complain, “You know, this escape is for my benefit. Wouldn’t it be good for me to…I don’t know…take part in some of the actual planning?”

             
“You just did.”

             
“Yeah, after the fact, when you already had this part worked out.”

             
He flashes me an irresistible grin. “And didn’t that work out well?”

             
I playfully shove his shoulder. He uses the momentum to stand on his feet.
“I’m sorry, but I don’t have anything in particular planned. I’m just making it up as I observe what’s going on around us. Which, forgive me, but you can’t come watch. I promise I’ll run everything by you and ask for your input once it
all
comes together in my head.” He grabs his satchel and loops it over his shoulder. “Besides,” he adds with a wink, “you’ve got leg squats to do.”

             
I groan and chuck my bread at him as he ascends. It would’ve hit him square in the chest if he hadn’t caught it. “Nice shot. Now quit playing with your food and eat it!” he shouts, reaching the top and tossing the sourdough back into my lap.

             
More leg squats…hummph!

 

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