Drive Me Sane (14 page)

Unfortunately, the contentment didn’t last. She noticed Rollins slowly changing. Instead of moving past their accident, he wanted to dwell on it and they started fighting when she told him she was tired of talking about it all the time. Things went downhill from there. They’d already slept together by then, which didn’t help the situation any.

She felt an obligation to help him, but it was difficult when she wasn’t quite sure how to help herself. He abused his medications and started drinking. When he quit coming to work, the army began the process of discharging him. Sometimes she was still angry that they’d given up on him so easily. If he’d been pushed to get help more avidly, maybe he could have worked through his turmoil, but it seemed they were all too happy to pass his troubles off to someone else. She’d tried the best she could, but he refused to listen and that was when their arguments fueled. She’d said some terrible things. Especially when it came to her feelings for him, but he hadn’t held back much either. By the time he left, they were barely speaking and although he’d reached out since then, she’d refused any kind of contact back. She couldn’t go there again. The constant battle of not only him, but her fears too, was more than she could handle, and she wasn’t going to open herself back up to it.

Turning off the light, she rounded the bed and climbed in, not caring about the soiled clothing or layer of grime coating the hair on Tyler’s arms. Not even the distinct smell of dirt and salt kept her from kissing his face and cuddling in next to him. She still had a ways to go when it came to opening up and baring her feelings like she knew she should do. Clamping down and ignoring the problems didn’t help, but at least she was starting to do so without losing her temper.

Rubbing her hand along Tyler’s jawline, she wondered what went through that mind of his. If circumstances had been different, who knew how the last three years would have gone? The accident in Afghanistan still would have happened and maybe her struggles would have been easier to handle with Tyler by her side; but who was to say, even if she hadn’t missed that call, that they would have made it? Their relationship was tumultuous at times. Not in a physical sense, but it seemed one was always giving while the other was taking—usually her. She’d taken advantage of his love and counted on him always being there. And her actions didn’t always accurately portray how deeply she felt for him. Surely at some point he would have grown tired of the act, and who knew what would have happened then? If their parting had ended more turbulently, would they have been able to forge a friendship as they had now?

Maybe the missed call wasn’t a missed opportunity, but rather a chance for both of them to grow as individuals and learn how to appreciate one another the way lovers were supposed to. It might be three years too late, but she appreciated him now.

• • •

A hint of honeysuckle tempted Tyler awake. The sweet smell was like heaven to his senses. Rolling his neck to the side, he saw Sera lying closely, but with only one arm draped lightly over his shoulder.

“Hey, you,” he said when he saw her eyes were open. Giving a look out the window and seeing it was dark, he asked, “What time is it?”

“Almost ten.” She smiled back. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“I’m glad you did. I need a shower.” Calling a truce, he grabbed the hand she’d laid over him and brought it to his lips before sitting up and pulling his shirt up over his head.

Twenty minutes later, he sat back on the edge of the bed with Sera on her knees behind him. He felt no pain from the circular pattern her fingertips made as she swirled the cooling gel around on his back. Instead of drawing out the warmth, each touch sizzled his skin more than it already did. He closed his eyes, content to sit there all night while she worked magic against his pains.

His back stiffened in an arch when her hands left, the absence of her touch a harsh reality. But then he felt a tingle in the crook of his neck, followed by a soft press of her lips against his skin. The kiss lingered in a spot that only she knew drove him mad. The kind of sensation that had him dying to wait it out, so to savor the moment, yet pushing feverously toward a powerful need for more. When her arms came around, palming the pecs of his chest, he leaned back into her, tilting his head to the side, asking for more. She gave it. Dabbing small kisses, she traced a line around the left side of his collarbone. Sparks of excitement flew south, hardening his growing bulge. The stiffness swelled as she swathed kisses around the back of his neck, giving the same attention to his left side as she had his right. He moaned when her fingers began kneading the buds of his nipples. The sound encouraged her further and he nearly came undone when her arms circled back around him, pressing the swells of her bare breasts against his back.

“Make love to me, Tyler,” she murmured in his ear.

If it was possible to become intoxicated from sound, Tyler was sure he was there. Tipsy from the scent of her body wash, buzzing with heat from the feel of her hands, stoned from the beauty of her face that he could picture at any moment as if it were right in front of him. Every one of his senses was heightened. All he had to do was taste her and he’d be completely gone.

Standing, he wasted no time pulling Sera in his arms. His mouth descended on hers, taking and giving with full thrust of his tongue. Her nipples tightened between his fingers as he rolled them into round beads. She let out a low sigh when he cupped her bottom, dragging her closer, pressing his groin firmly into her middle. Another gasp came when he dipped his hands inside the hem of her cotton shorts and smoothed his hands against the fullness of each cheek.

“Baby, you drive me crazy,” he whispered, shimmying her shorts down her legs. She lifted each knee, further consenting their joining as she stepped out and he tossed them aside. She was left in nothing but a pair of stripped bikini panties, and he admired the curve of her waist gliding up to the mounds of her chest. Scanning her flat stomach, he throbbed harder. Seeing a mirror of his craving reflected in her eyes, he pulled her up and instinctively she wrapped her legs around him.

Taking his time, spurring her excitement with small swipes of his tongue, he blanketed her body as he lay down. Tasting and teasing the skin along her neck, down each shoulder, to the dip in between her breasts. The mounds peaked with attention. He suckled one and then the other, licking the tinted circles, feeling Sera squirm with pleasure underneath. Every movement sent another rush of adrenaline to his groin. The lifting of her hips, welcoming his firmness against her femininity, had him aching for release. Her heavy pants begged for the same. Knowing he wouldn’t last long, he encouraged her escalation. Fingering aside the thin strip of material that hindered the passage to her opening, he slid in a finger. Letting moisture collect, he treasured the wail of pleasure that bounced off her lips. “God, you’re wet,” he whispered, pulling out.

She panted. “Tyler.”

“What, baby?”

“Please,” she begged.

Sliding his finger back in, her hips lifted in satisfaction, then fell into an arch when he pulled back out. Rubbing his thumb against her most sensitive area, he pushed up in inside her again. This time, she let out a moan, while tugging at his hair. Quickening the pace, he moved against her nub until she screamed out.

As much as he always enjoyed bringing her to climax over and over before partaking in his own pleasure, it was important to him that they come together this time. Shedding his shorts and boxers, he covered himself, before peeling off her panties and throwing them aside.

His heart pounded with the race of his pulse throbbing at the tip of his head. One good thrust and he’d be done. Nudging her slick opening, he entered slowly, parting her sex with an unhurried push. She gave a low murmur of approval as he delved in deeper. Withdrawing, then pushing back in, he glided with more force the second time. The sting from her fingernails sinking into the blades of his shoulders drove him faster. Her hips thrust up with every push and pull until they found a rhythm. The pace quickened, and Sera cried out again. Then her thighs clenched, sending them both sailing over the waves of glory.

Propped up on an elbow, Tyler rubbed the back of his hand over Sera’s pinked cheek. The color was evidence of the thorough grazing his unshaven jaw had made as he ravished her mouth. Their lovemaking had been fulfilling in every way.

Sera drifted off almost immediately. His body was telling him he needed to do the same, but he was afraid to take his eyes away, fearful she’d be gone if he did. He’d waited three years for her to come back to him. Had almost given up hope of it ever happening, and now that she was here, he’d do his damnedest to make sure she stayed.

She wasn’t the same Sera he remembered, and at first he didn’t think he’d like her new tamed-down personality, but nothing about her was repressed. She still spoke her mind. Maybe not as often or as turbulently as before, but her point was made clear. Her infectious laugh and soothing smile hadn’t left and she made love to him just as feverishly as she always had. None of those things had changed. She was still the loving, caring person he’d always known. Her vulnerability was the only thing different. He didn’t view it as a flaw or a sign of weakness either. In fact, the quality made her more appealing, and not in a way that made her inferior. If anything, it created an equal balance between them. She needed him just as much as he needed her.

He hadn’t put much thought into the idea of her joining him on his tour. All he knew was that he wanted this to work and was willing to do whatever it took to make it happen. With his schedule, he’d be lucky to make it home a couple of days a month. A day or two here and there wasn’t enough for him. For his own sanity, he needed to be with her.

But even if she had agreed, he knew now that roaming from city to city wasn’t what was best. Stability in her life would be good. She hadn’t really had a home to call her own since joining the army. She’d gone off to basic training in South Carolina before being stationed in Texas and then ordered to Afghanistan. Now that she was out, he figured she needed to put down her roots again. Get back into civilian life and a routine—something she couldn’t do on the road.

He could already hear the string of expletives Bradley would spew when he told him he was pulling out of the tour. The guys in the band would probably be mad at first too, but once he explained his situation he was sure they’d understand. It was everyone else behind the scenes that worried him most.

Pulling out his phone, Tyler saw Bradley’s name flash across the screen. Moving his finger between the buttons to accept or reject, he tapped reject, then tossed it aside before getting up and going to the living room, where Sera was stretched out on the couch reading a book. Picking up her feet, he sat down, letting them fall into his lap.

“Get much done?” she asked, peering over the top.

“A little,” he answered. “I like where it’s going.”

“It sounds really good.”

“It did?”

“Yeah, the melody sounds fun.”

The words floating through his head that morning when he’d woken were now on paper. The song still had a ways to go, but he was excited to get back to writing after taking a yearlong break. “Feels good to be writing again.”

“I can’t believe you stopped. You loved it as much as you did being up on stage.”

Curling his hand around her thigh, he answered, “The desire just wasn’t there.”

“Well, I’m glad you got it back.” She sat up, delivering a kiss to his cheek.

“I’m going to ride over to my dad’s. Get that out of the way.”

She peered at him with slanted eyes. “You sure?”

He shrugged.

Giving him a shoo away with her hand, she said, “Go. I know he’s your dad and you love him. Tell him hi for me.”

• • •

Sera was at the stove making dinner when Tyler came home from visiting his dad. Going straight to his room, he didn’t speak, but every step he took rang through the walls. Despite her urge to run to him and see if he was okay, she ignored the discomfort and continued stirring the spaghetti sauce she’d put together.

She should have gone with him. He detested the rare visits, but she thought her and Doug’s mutual dislike for one another would have only put more strain between father and son. Their relationship had been a forced one for as long as she knew. It was a relationship she thought Tyler was better off without, but that wasn’t her decision to make.

Hearing him come up behind her, she turned off the stove and turned around, ready to smile, but held it back when she saw lines slanting downwards out of the corners of his freshly shaven face.

“You okay?” she asked, running her hand along his soft cheek.

“Rough day.”

“I guess nothing’s changed?” She wrapped both arms around his neck, and instinctively Tyler encircled her waist.

“Let’s see. He was drunk when I got there. Hit me up for money and then proceeded to lecture me about why I needed to get a real man’s job. Oh, and I’m pretty sure his new wife—who, by the way, looks younger than me—is knocked up. Let’s hope not by him.”

“I’m sorry.” She dabbed another kiss along the side of his jaw.

“You have nothing to be sorry for.” He returned the kiss to her lips.

“I’m sorry he’s such an ass.”

Tyler laughed. “You keep it real, don’t you?”

“Only way to be.” She smiled back then, happy that she’d livened up his face a little. “Are you hungry?”

“I am. But what do you say after we eat, we head down to Merv’s for a night out?”

“I’d say it sounds like a plan.”

They stood just inside the entrance looking for a place to sit. Merv’s was a favorite on Friday nights for those who drove the hour drive east into Lexington or west to the coal mines for work. It was late, so a crowd had already gathered to celebrate the end of the work week. People milled around in between tables, talking as they went while the band rang out from the stage.

Finally Tyler saw a table in the midst of being abandoned. He clasped Sera’s hand tighter, tugging her in the direction of the empty seat.