Authors: Sara Craven
you at home. Mr Greer would like a word with you.'
Davina groaned inwardly. For a moment she toyed with the idea of
asking Jan to forget she had seen her while she made her escape,
but she soon abandoned it. Jan was a pleasant woman, but she was
simply not on those kind of terms with her. So instead she smiled
and murmured her thanks, promising she would be along presently.
When Jan vanished, she got up and walked the few paces to the
window. There was little to see but a patch of sky framed by other
people's roofs, and the odd pigeon or two, but when she had first
come there, she had spent a lot of time staring out at that limited
view until she felt she knew every slate and every Victorian
chimneypot.
Her fingers drummed restlessly on the white-painted sill. She knew
why Uncle Philip wanted to see her, of course. He knew precisely
where she had been that afternoon, and could presumably restrain
his curiosity no longer.
She supposed she could not blame him under the circumstances.
After all, the other party involved was one of his protégés, a writer
for whom he had confidently predicted great things. And he had
been right. Both Gethyn's novels had been runaway best-sellers,
here and in the States, and he promised to become a major force in
the poetic world as well. Since then—two years of silence.
Her uncle's voice sounded preoccupied as he called out 'Come in' in
reply to her brief tap on the door. He was dictating some letters into
a dictaphone as she entered and he signalled to her to take a seat
while he went on talking '... and shall look forward to seeing you on
the 21st. Yours.' He switched off the machine and smiled at her.
'Hello, my dear. How did it go? Did this tame lawyer your mother
found produce the goods?'
'Well,' Davina considered her polished fingernails, 'at least he's
produced Gethyn. He's back in Wales. Did you know?'
'No.' Was it her imagination, or had there been a slight pause before
the monosyllable? Davina glanced up quickly, but Philip Greer was
leaning back in his chair, his frowning gaze fixed musingly on a
ballpoint pen he was twirling in his fingers. 'But all the same I'm
pleased to hear it.'
'Why?'
'Because it might just mean he's ready to settle down and get some
work done—some real work.'
Davina bent her head. 'I see.'
Philip Greer gazed at her rather ironically. 'What did you expect me
to say? I haven't any other hopes where Gethyn's concerned any
more. I'm resigned to the fact that you're determined to put an end
to this marriage of yours.'
She looked up indignantly. 'Well, what do you expect?' she
demanded in turn. 'This marriage of mine, as you put it, hasn't
existed for two years. It barely existed before then.' She gave a
bitter laugh. 'If I'd ignored my upbringing and simply gone to bed
with Gethyn, it need never have taken place at all. Now there's an
irony for you!'
Philip Greer made an abrupt movement. 'If you're saying that the
basis for your marriage was no more than physical attraction, then I
should point out that a great many successful unions have started
out on little else.'
'I see,' she said again. 'Perhaps I pitched my own expectations too
high.'
He sighed. 'Now I've made you angry, my dear, and I didn't intend
that. I've always felt—responsible in some ways for what happened
between you and Gethyn, and I know your mother shares my
viewpoint,' he added wryly.
She flushed. 'I know. I've tried to tell her ...'
'My dear, no one will ever convince Vanessa about anything she
doesn't wish to hear. And I'm afraid she "took agin" Gethyn the first
time she saw him. And he didn't help, of course. He needn't have
made it quite so clear that he was indifferent to her and her opinion
of him. If he'd just pretended ...'
She gave a strained smile. 'Pretence was beyond him, I'm afraid.
He—he couldn't even pretend with me—pretend that I mattered, or
that he cared, even a little.'
'Are you so sure he didn't?'
'Uncle Philip,' Davina stared at him, 'how can you ask that? You
know what happened. He was in the States and I was here—in
hospital, losing his baby. I sent for him—I begged him to come
back and be with me. But he was far too busy with some television
chat show. He just didn't want to know. Every time the door opened
in that hospital room, I thought it was going to be him. Only it never
was. And even then, I swallowed my pride when it was all over and
telephoned him. Do you know the answer I got? He was resting and
couldn't be disturbed. Later that night I wrote to him and told him I
was leaving him. He never replied to my letter either, and I've never
heard from him from that day to this.' She forced a smile. 'I'm sorry
about the downbeat ending, but…'
'Don't be flip, my dear. It's unsuitable in this context.' Her uncle was
silent for a while. 'I can only say that I find his—lack of response
totally incredible. I can't help wondering if it would have made any
difference if you had gone to see him, instead of writing. Letters
can go astray, you know. Phone messages may not always be
passed on, and sometimes are distorted in the re-telling. Did it ever
occur to you that there might have been some—misunderstanding?'
'One, perhaps. Not three,' she said quietly. 'And I feel sure his
silence was—is—deliberate. He won't answer my solicitor's letters
either.'
Philip Greer raised his eyebrows. 'Indeed? So what's the next
move?'
'I'm not altogether sure.' She hesitated. 'Mr Bristow has suggested
that I should do—what you've just said—go and see Gethyn and try
and talk him into agreeing to a divorce.'
'And you said?'
'I didn't know what to say. Frankly, I was stunned.'
'But you didn't reject the idea out of hand?'
'No.' Davina paused bleakly. 'I wouldn't reject any idea that might
help me to be free of him.'
'Hm.' Her uncle gave her a narrow look. 'Well, if you do decide to
seek him out, I wouldn't be quite so frank. In fact, it's a pity that the
divorce has to be your sole motive for going to Wales. Now I
wonder ...' he relapsed into frowning silence. Then he glanced at
her. 'How would it be if this was ostensibly a business trip? After
all, Gethyn is still under contract to us, and we need another book
from him. Go and see him—but as my representative, not as his
estranged wife. Don't even mention Bristow's letters or the divorce,
unless he does.'
Davina shook her head. 'He wouldn't be taken in by that.'
'I'm not saying he would be, but at least he wouldn't be expecting it.
I also know Gethyn, my dear, and I'm sure an oblique approach
would work best. It's a pity we didn't think of it before your mother
involved Bristow, but it's too late to do anything about that now.
What I'm trying to say is that you won't get what you want by flying
off to Wales and quarrelling with Gethyn. That would only harden
his attitude, and that's the last thing you want to do.'
'Yes.' Davina was silent for a moment. 'I suppose it's worth a try. At
least it's better than doing nothing—than just waiting for Gethyn to
make the first move.'
Philip Greer tapped his upper lip thoughtfully with his forefinger.
'Tell him too that there could be another tour in the offing. Oh, it's
quite true,' he added hastily, meeting Davina's quizzical look. 'There
have been a number of overtures in the past few months. I've just
been waiting for the psychological moment to put it to Gethyn. I
had to sell the last one to him, as a matter of fact, but you probably
know that.'
Yes, Davina thought, as she walked slowly back to her own office.
She had known that. But not until afterwards— after she had agreed
to marry Gethyn. And then it had been altogether different because
the trip to America was going to be their honeymoon—not the
handful of nights in the suite of a luxury hotel which Uncle Philip
was giving them as a wedding present. She had been as excited as a
child at Christmas at the prospect, thrilled to the core as well
because Gethyn had told her that if she hadn't wanted to go with
him, he would have called the whole thing off. It gave her a
wonderful feeling of power, a feeling of being necessary. It had
been a delusion, of course, as she quickly found out, but for that
brief time she had never been happier. She had dreamed of the
places they would see together—New York, San Francisco, even
New Orleans.
'And Niagara Falls,' Gethyn had said, grinning. 'Isn't that where all
self-respecting honeymooners go?'
Only by the time he' had left for the States—alone—the honeymoon
was already over.
Davina closed her door behind her, and sank down in the chair
behind her desk, reaching automatically for the manuscript on top
of the pile in front of her. She began to read it, forcing herself
relentlessly to concentrate, but it was useless. It was the story of a
failed marriage, and even in the first chapter there were words,
phrases, scraps of dialogue which struck a painful chord in her own
memory. At last she pushed it almost desperately to one side and
buried her head in her folded arms on the desktop.
When had it all started to go wrong? she asked herself. Hadn't her
mother sown the first seeds of doubt, even before the wedding
ceremony had taken place? She had come into Davina's room on the
morning of the wedding and watched her as she packed a suitcase.
Davina had just been smoothing the folds of a filmy drift of
nightgown when she had caught sight of her mother's expression in
the dressing-table mirror, her eyes hooded, her lips thin with
distaste.
'Mother,' she had said, gently enough, 'please try to be happy for
me.'
'Happy?' Her mother's laugh had been almost shrill. 'Happy that
you're rushing headlong into marriage with a complete stranger?
You may think you know all you need to know, but you're a child.
What do you know of men—of what living with a man means? I
was fortunate. Your father was a kind man—considerate,
undemanding. But
he
won't be like that. You'd better enjoy your
innocence while you can. It won't be yours much longer. Wait until
you've been alone with him, tonight, and then talk to me about
happiness!'
She had turned then and gone from the room, leaving Davina
staring after her with startled eyes and parted lips. She had resumed
her packing, but the golden glow which surrounded her had
dissipated somewhat. It was the nearest her mother had come, or
ever would come, she realised, to discussing the sexual relationship
with her. She had always sensed instinctively that her parents'
marriage had been lacking in certain aspects. Widowhood, she had
often thought wryly, suited her mother far better than being a wife
had done. But this was the first time Mrs Greer had ever spoken
openly on the subject, and made her disgust plain.
And later when she arrived at Caxton Hall and saw Gethyn waiting
for her, tall and unfamiliar in his dark suit, her mother's words had
returned to her mind with paralysing force, freezing the smile on her
lips. Even while the registrar was marrying them, she could feel
Gethyn's eyes on her, questioningly. Afterwards Uncle Philip had
taken them to the Ritz and they had drunk champagne, and she had
found herself acting the part of the radiant bride, laughing that little
bit too much, smiling until her mouth ached.. And all the time
knowing that he was watching her, and not wanting to meet his eyes
in case she read in them a message she wasn't ready for yet. But she
had to be ready, that was the whole point. She was his wife now
and very soon now they would be alone and he would take her in
his arms and everything would be all right. She held on to that
thought with quiet desperation. She was just being stupid —bridal
nerves. That was all it was—it had to be.
After all, in the past weeks there had been times when she had
clung to Gethyn, glorying in his desire for her, but armoured at the
same time, she realised, by the iron self-control he seemed to be
able to exercise where she was concerned. Now there was no
longer any need for that control. She belonged to him.
She sat beside him in the taxi as they drove to the small flat he was