Dominique (12 page)

Dominique and I had been together for almost a year and time had really flown.
 
She had dedicated herself to my pleasure and I delighted in every moment.
 
Well,
just about
every moment.
 
There was one time when she forgot to pick me up from work when my car was in the shop.
 
That was pretty annoying.
 
But other than that it’s been wonderful, with only the normal minor hiccups.
 
Teaching her ways to please me and to get in touch with her submissive self were thoroughly enjoyable.
 
Even when I reined her in, I was so pleased by her reaction I found it hard not to smile.
 
We were at the point where simply telling her I was disappointed was enough to change her
behaviour
.

     
We were comfortable in each other’s company, often discussing the finer points of play for hours after a session in the study.
 
She still blushed beautifully.
 
She wasn’t shameless.
 
It was more like she was constantly surprised by her own reaction to whatever I did to her, or had her do.
 
Feeling embarrassed by her own apparent lack of control both amused and delighted me.
 
It provided us with endless hours of fun.

     
And yet, there were times when I wondered whether she was falling behind in her development.
 
Had we settled into a ‘comfort zone’?
 
I
had
pushed her limits.
 
I taught her much about herself, and had diligently provided myself with a submissive best equipped to provide me with the pleasure I desired and enjoyed.

     
I had a responsibility to Dominique, to help her become the submissive she desired to be.
 
On occasion, she complained that she ‘thought too much’ and worried about me when I was gone.
 
She confessed she was afraid I would meet someone and be unable to control myself.
 
At the time, she blushed,
recognising
immediately how silly the idea sounded.
 
We had a big talk that night.
 
I explained that apart from thinking this or that woman was attractive, I had barely noticed other women since I had met her.
 
Of course, Dominique burst into tears of joy at this news.
 
The funny thing was, it got me thinking.

     
And it wasn’t about other women.
 
My interest didn’t lie there.
 
I wasn’t stupid.
 
I had a wonderful woman, and I was as happy as I’d been in years.

     
But her remarks and her
demeanour
that night troubled me for some time.
 
Not constantly.
 
More like a pea under the mattress kind of thing.
 
We were having such fun together it was easily forgotten until a quiet moment when it would intrude upon my thoughts.
 
Eventually I
realised
what it was that was bothering me.

     
It was just
us
.
 
We were living in a vacuum.
 
We had our vanilla friends and our life together and that was it.
 
I even started to get a little concerned about my
own
lack of development.
 
Would I always see the desire in her eyes?
 
I was confident we had built something strong.
 
But if we re-entered the lifestyle as a couple, what would people think?
 
Just how much had I taught her?
 
How deeply did she understand herself?
 
Was I short-changing her by keeping her to myself?

     
Being a dominant was hard work.
 
One needed to be supremely confident of the choices he or she made on another’s behalf, and to be prepared to follow a plan to reach a desired goal.
 
Finding new challenges that were truly compatible with what I wanted for myself and for Dominique, meant putting my mind to work, and that was when I started making decisions.

     
I needed to help Dominique find her limits.
 
I had pushed them, but I hadn’t found them.
 
I needed her to explore all kinds of feelings, to know herself and her relationship to me like the back of her hand.
 
To know where it began and where it ended.
 
She needed to learn to trust me.
 
I knew she did, one on one.
 
That wasn’t my concern.
 
It was her reaction to my being away that had made me
realise
it.

     
Her trust wasn’t that strong.

     
I needed to show her another level, where trust was implicit and unquestionable.
 
I was willing to go a long way with her, but how far had she come?
 
I needed her on the same page as me.
 
She had to be prepared to do exactly as I asked, even when it made no sense or was unpleasant for her.
 
Unquestioningly.
 
That was the level of trust that I wanted.
 
And I started thinking long and hard about how to make it happen.

     
Eventually I came to the conclusion that I couldn’t do it on my own.
 
I needed her to question her place in my life and to find new meaning in it.
 
I needed her to discover for herself just how much more of herself she could give.
 
I discarded some ideas for various reasons.
 
But I kept returning to the same one.
 
It was somewhat risky, and I didn’t want to freak her out and send her running away screaming, never to return.
 
But then again, if she ran, just how deep were her feelings for me in the first place?
 
My thoughts kept returning to something I had read many years ago.
 
‘
One’s submissive may be subjected to all manner of things, as long as there is a reason for them.’
In other words, and within clear limits, the
end
justifies the
means
.

     
I had to decide just how much I was going to tell her.
 
Should I tell her everything?
 
Or nothing and see where the cards fell.
 
I couldn’t do that.
 
But I couldn’t give the whole game away either.
 
I didn’t want her thinking
I
didn’t trust
her
.
 
I honestly didn’t think that was the problem.
 
But I did think it was the way to the solution.

     
With it just being the two of us, we never had occasion to talk about having other people or lovers in our lives.
 
We were so wrapped up in each other it was never discussed.
 
She had mentioned a couple of fantasies in passing, but I basically filed them away as being the normal fantasies of a passionate young woman, just as she had intended.

     
Seeing as I had pretty much dropped out of the lifestyle, Dominique had rarely met with the many friends and acquaintances I’d made over the years.
 
I’d get the occasional phone call, and Dominique would ask how so and so was, though she had never met them.
 
She did know Paul though.
 
Paul and I stay in regular touch and he had met Dominique once at a mixer.
 
He was a very good and solid friend.
 
We had one of those friendships that goes way back, and I confided my plan to him.
 
He made a few minor adjustments and it was agreed.
 
The end justified the means.
 
Now, if Dominique did as she had been taught to do, we could move on.
 
Deeper.
 
Together.

     
Before I left on my regular visit to the west coast office, I told Dominique Paul would be checking in on her, and that while he was here, she was to do as he said.
 
I didn’t make it into a big deal, and she happily agreed.
 
She liked Paul and had no fear of him.
 
I think she pretty much forgot about it, imagining it would be a coffee and a chat type of situation.

Throwing a robe around myself, I wondered who might be at the door at this hour.
 
I hoped it was Andrew, but dismissed the thought as he would have let himself in.
 
Just in case, I ran my fingers through my hair in the hallway mirror before opening the big front door.

     
There stood Paul.
 
I didn’t know he was coming ‘unannounced’ and was completely surprised.
 
He looked at me intently, his eyes running slowly up and down the length of my body.
 
I felt terribly under-dressed and vulnerable and instantly wished I had changed or thrown on something more substantial.
 
I went to speak and he held up his hand to stop me.
 
“Andrew asked me to check on you and make sure you weren’t getting up to no good,” he said, giving me a wink.

     
I smiled and nodded, stepping back and opening the door for him.
 
He just stood there.
 
“Um, please come in, Sir,” I said quickly.

     
“Thank you, Dominique.
 
I will.”

     
I’m alone with a different dominant.
 
What a strange feeling
.
 
In an instant I was completely off balance.
 
I could feel how wet I was and had the bizarre thought that Paul knew I’d been masturbating.
 
Of course, that made me blush even more, even though it was preposterous.
 
It didn’t help that he was ruggedly handsome.
 
He walked straight into the sunken lounge room and flopped on the leather sofa.
 
I stopped at the top of the two steps, holding my robe together.
 
The situation felt totally weird and once again I was wondering what was going on.

     
“May I get you anything, Sir?
 
A-A drink or a coffee?”

     
“Scotch on the rocks please, Dominique.
 
And make yourself a drink too.”

     
“Yes, Sir.”
 
I don’t really like scotch so I made myself a vodka and orange.
 
Returning with the drinks on a pretty silver tray, I held it out in front of him and smiled.
 
As he looked up at me from his place on the couch, his eyes narrowed and a wash of anticipation raced over my skin.

I’ve known Paul a long time.
 
We talk on the phone regularly, exchanging ideas and keeping abreast of any news.
 
I trust him and he trusts me.
 
“Paul, it’s Andrew.”

     
“Hey, Andrew!
 
How’s things?”

     
“Great, buddy.
 
Listen, you remember what we were talking about the other day?”

     
“Yeah, how could I forget?”

     
“Let’s do it.”

     
“Okay, if you’re sure.”

     
“I’m sure.”

Paul didn’t look pleased.
 
“Andrew called me today and asked me to drop in on you and make sure you weren’t slipping in his absence.
 
I can’t say I’m impressed.”

     
“But-”

     
“Get on your knees and serve me properly.”

     
On my knees?
 
I swallowed wondering if he was taking advantage of me.
 
Paul had never spoken to me like that before, but Andrew was always here.
 
Is this right?
 
Is this what happens when he’s not around?
 
As gracefully as I could, I slipped to my knees, keeping them tightly together and bowing my head, offering the tray to Paul.
 
On the inside I was going crazy.
 
I wanted to ask if I could go change, but it didn’t seem right.
 
Maybe he wouldn’t be staying?