Domesticated (27 page)

Garrison was… I don’t even know how to explain what Garrison was. He tried to be attentive and focus on me, holding my hand, and kissing me out of the blue. He even bought me a rose from one of the street vendors after we ate barbeque and listened to blues music on The Strip. Garrison hated The Strip. Of course, I didn’t say anything about his behavior and he didn’t mine. I wanted to lie and tell him I was on my period again, but remembered I had just used that excuse two weeks before.

It was so weird it was sort of creepy. Garrison kissed me with his tongue in the middle of the street. I backed away when the guy that had gotten used to serving Sam and me beer glanced at me. He probably thought I was cheating on Sam. As much as I didn’t want to, I coaxed Garrison back to the house where we wouldn’t be seen. I didn’t want to be seen with him.

The theatrics in bed were even more comical. Garrison tried like hell to be smooth, focused on me, but I would call it a fail. He was all thumbs and I couldn’t help but compare his clumsiness to Sam’s amazing hands. There was no comparison. I almost laughed when he lifted my shirt and looked at my nipples with a frown before his attempt to arouse them. It didn’t work. They didn’t pucker into hard little pebbles the way they did when Sam sucked on them. I’m not sure what the hell Garrison was doing. It wasn’t sexy at all. It was comical, like a fifteen-year-old boy or something.

“Maybe we should start doing this more, you know, so you can get pregnant,” Garrison said while pumping in out of me.

I didn’t reply. I tried like hell not to show the distasteful look on my face, wishing he would hurry.

“Does this feel good for you?” OH GOD!

“Yes, Garrison,” I lied, closing my eyes and praying for the grunts that would bring me more relief than him.

I immediately slid from beneath him and walked to the bathroom. Never before did I worry about jumping in the shower or taking a bath afterward. Garrison wouldn’t care. He had his nose in his work or a law book to even notice. He noticed that night. For whatever reason, he was paying close attention to my actions.

“Why did you do that?”

“Aahh!” I screamed, stepping out of the shower. “Garrison, I’m naked.”

“So, we’re married. I can see you naked.”

I wrapped myself in a big fluffy towel, wanting to hide myself from him. Wow. What a change. I tried for years to get him to look at me naked, to really see me, and he made it out to be dirty. Now when I was ready to tell him I wanted out, he decides to see me. Great. Just what I needed.

“What’s going on with you?” I asked, wrapping my long blond hair in a towel and moving past him.

“I want you to be happy. I want to make you happy.”

“Why?” I questioned, not even trying to hide the tone.

“What do you mean, why? I love you. You’re my wife. I want you to be happy.”

I walked out to the balcony and dropped to a chair. Garrison followed. Breathing in a deep sea-salt filled breath, I ran my hands over my face.

“Kendra?” Garrison questioned, sitting next to me.

“Garrison, I don’t want this anymore,” I divulged, putting it out there.

“What don’t you want?”

“Us, this, we’re not good together. I want more.”

“What does that mean, Kendra? I give you everything you want, don’t I?”

“Money can’t buy what I want, Garrison.”

“What do you want? If it’s the baby thing, I’ll get you a baby. We can adopt. I’m sure we can get on the top of a list. You can even pick a girl or a boy.”

“You don’t get it. I don’t want to have a social climbing little rich kid. I want a baby that goes to preschool with all races and religions. I want a baby that goes to a public school, and rides a school bus with normal kids. I would never wish this on a child. I don’t want a baby with you. I just want out, Garrison.”

“Is it because of Sam?”

My eyes shot to his moonlit silhouette. He knew? “What?”

“I’ve known for a while. I have pictures.”

“You had me investigated?”

“No, no. It wasn’t like that at all. It was actually your mom’s idea. She was afraid of you coming here alone. I paid someone to stay close by, make sure you were okay and didn’t find yourself in a bad situation.”

“Who was it?”

“Your neighbor. I let him go after a week.”

“The guy next door,” I stated, remembering the single man. I remembered feeling creeped out by him. No wonder I thought he was always staring at me. 

“Do you love him?”

I was speechless. I didn’t know what to say. I guess it was what I expected, I mean, I never really expected Garrison to get angry and scream at me, or go after Sam for moving in on his wife. I didn’t know what to say. “I don’t know if I love Sam. He makes me feel like you never have.”

“I’ll do better.”

“Garrison, you can’t. You’re not that person.”

“But neither are you. You were raised just like me. You come from the same place I do.”

“That part you’re sort of right about. You know why, Garrison? Because we both come from fucked up childhoods. You were raised to believe a wife’s place was beneath you. You are the head of the house and sex was dirty, and used only to produce children. I was raised by an abusive stepmother who made it a point to make sex dirty and appealing. We’re two different people who came from the same fucked up, evil dollar bill.”

“I don’t know what that means. I think you should start seeing someone. I can call Dr. Forager. I’ve done work for him.”

“You’re not listening, Garrison. I don’t want you. I don’t want money anymore.”

“You won’t have any if you divorce me. You do remember your trust fund is contingent upon me, right? I’m the legal guardian over your money.”

“And if you can live with it, I can live without it. I’m an educated woman. I’m sure I can find work.”

“I don’t want your money, Kendra. I want you.”

“What is it you want?”

“I want you to come home. I want you to go back to your old self. I don’t care about this Sam guy. He’s nobody. Please, just come home and stop this nonsense.”

“See, that’s what you want. That’s not what I want. I hate my life there. I don’t want to come home. I don’t want to be with you. And I don’t want your money, the extravagant vacations, the cars, the jewelry, none of it. I just want to be normal.”

“Fine, you want to go buy a two bedroom house on Main Street, that’s what we’ll do,” Garrison offered with more emotion than he’d shown our entire marriage. I did feel bad for him, but I also knew he would be fine without me. Garrison didn’t love me, Garrison was used to me. Garrison didn’t know love. He didn’t know what it could really feel like. I had a taste of what it could be, and I knew Garrison would get over me.

“I. Don’t. Want. You. Garrison,” I said as plainly as I could possibly say it. I knew I might be out on the street the next day. I knew my mother would probably never talk to me again. I knew I might very well be by myself, but I was okay with that. As long as Olivia helped me get what I wanted, I would be just fine.

Garrison didn’t sleep with me that night, and he was up and gone when I woke to my ringing phone the following morning.

“Kendra, what is going on? You get home to your husband right this second and stop all this nonsense.”

“I’m not doing this with you, Mom,” I assured the mother that never called me, the mother that talked to my husband more than me, the mother who believed Adriana over me, the mother who left me to fend for myself.

“I’ve already talked to your assistant. Olivia is willing to do whatever you want her to do.”

She called Olivia? Dumb bitch. Who the hell did she think she was? “I know she is, but that doesn’t consist of going home to Garrison. I don’t want to be with him anymore, Mom.”

“And what do you propose you’re going to do? You planning on marrying that schoolteacher from North Carolina? You planning to let him take care of you on a teacher’s salary? He’ll never be able to give you the things you’re accustomed to. Money makes the world go round, Kendra. You of all people should know that. You know your father’s money is all through Garrison. You will walk away with nothing.”

“I’m okay with that. Bye.” I hung up. I had to. There was nothing at all I could say to get her to understand, and I wasn’t even going to try. I had to start on the second phase of my plan and hope like hell I didn’t get evicted before I had it in place.

I was expecting more of a fight from Garrison. At least a little. He didn’t, my credit card still worked when I paid for our food that night, and I didn’t get an eviction notice, not yet anyway.

I wasn’t sure who to start on, Olivia or Sam. Olivia made it easy for me while we ate breakfast that we made together.

“I don’t blame you. I’m proud of you,” Olivia stated. We ate inside, looking out at the overcast, drizzling rainy day.

“Olivia, I have a proposition for you,” I said, retrieving my laptop. I wasn’t sure if I could pull it off, but I was praying that Garrison wouldn’t touch my father’s money. As long as he didn’t do that, I was okay, and everything I was about to propose wouldn’t be a lie. I would follow through.

“What is this?” she asked, looking at the brick ranch on Hanover Street, three blocks from her parents. I made sure to show her all of it before I propositioned her, the three spacious bedrooms, the fenced in backyard with a wooden play set, the open floor plan where she could cook and watch her children play in the front room. Olivia watched the virtual tour as I showed her the master bedroom with the perfect master bath, and I know for a fact, I saw a twinkle in her eye.

“Do you like it? It’s close to your home.”

“You want to move close to me?” Olivia questioned.

I laughed. “No, silly. I want to buy it for you.”

“Why? This is like a two hundred thousand dollar home.”

“A hundred and sixty-five, but that’s not important.”

“I don’t understand,” Olivia questioned with a frown.

“I want to help you and Jackson, but I need your help in return.”

“What could you possibly want from me? I have nothing.”

I didn’t disclose the fact that I may not have anything, either. She didn’t need to know that yet. And I could only hope that Garrison wouldn’t be that cruel. Olivia needed to think about it, she wasn’t fond of the idea at all, but I knew she would do it. She wanted that house. I saw it in her eyes. The comment about it being blood money was beside the point. I knew I had her, without a doubt, I knew she would do it. Now to work on Sam.

The day took forever, and his seven o’clock arrival seemed to drag on and on. I tried to occupy my mind, going over my plan with Olivia, eating food that I wasn’t hungry for, and reading. Nothing was working. The wetness between my legs, the throbbing sensation telling me I needed to come, and the thought of the feeling wouldn’t stop.

“I’m going for a walk,” I finally told Olivia, needing something to inhabit my mind. I didn’t want to come. I wanted Sam to make me do that. The rain passed and the sun shone hot above my head. I carried my shoes and waded in the water to cool myself.

I stopped and removed my shorts and shirt when I came upon a family with three little girls. Walking out to the water, I watched them from a little ways out, intrigued. The three little girls were around the same ages as my sisters and me at that age. What fascinated me most was the oldest one was just like me—she was different. It was obvious that the oldest girl was of a different race. Her skin was darker and her light wire-like hair was different from her two blonde younger sisters.

The mother had blond hair, too, and I assumed the oldest child was interracial, probably born before the mother met the new father. I spun in the water, trying to be inconspicuous and not look like the obvious stalker. The family was nothing like my own. The dad scooped up the child that was clearly not his own flesh and blood, and played with her just like the other two. He acted like he loved them.

It made me think about the beach at the Dominica resort we’d stayed at when we were probably about the same age as these three little girls. I was probably eight, Katie was four, and Paris was two. It was one of the few times I saw my dad playful. I was very careful by then about what I said or did around Adriana. I had learned long ago that my dad was off limits. It wasn’t even my fault. It was his.

My dad grabbed both me and Katie, one in each arm, and carried us to the ocean where he let us ride on his back. He played with us for a good hour. I already knew I was in trouble so I played, had fun, and forgot about the consequences. It wasn’t until my dad told us to get out and rest awhile that it hit me. I saw the vengeance in Adriana’s eyes as my dad held both our hands and led us to the blanket.

“Let’s go collect some seashells, girls,”
my dad, said not long after we’d sat down. Adrian reached around Katie, who was sitting beside her, and squeezed the back of my neck, hard. It hurt, but I knew it was a warning for me not to go. I didn’t. I told my dad I was too tired. He and Katie took off down the beach, happy as could be.

“We’re going up to the house. I want to lay Paris down for a nap,”
Adriana pulled me by the back of my swimsuit to the beautiful home we would occupy for an entire week.

Adriana made me stand right in front of her while she glared at me and rocked Paris.
“You think you belong in this family? You think you’re one of us?”
Adriana asked, patting Paris on the back while her eyes grew heavier and heavier.

“No,”
I replied.

“No, what, Sewer Rat?”

“No, Mommy.”

“The next time your father is playing with Katie, you better damn well take yourself out of the picture. Do you understand me?”
Adriana sang in a happy tune for Paris through gritted teeth. I nodded, praying for my dad to come back and save me. He didn’t, and just like all the other times, I was on my own.

My heart was beating out of my chest when Adriana laid a sleeping Paris in the crib. Fisting my hair, she shoved me toward her and my father’s bedroom. I’m sure it was the first time ever one of my spankings allowed my bottom to stay covered. Being the young age that I was, I didn’t know that my father’s belt and my wet bathing suit could cause that much pain.

I always knew not to place my hands back there, it always made it worse, but that was one time it couldn’t be helped. Instinct kicked in, trying to protect my ass. That was the worse ass-beating I had ever received from her. Lying across their king-size bed, Adriana beat me with my father’s belt until I went limp, unable to take one more lick.

That was also the first time I welcomed the cold bath. The joy on her face while she stripped my suit and turned me to the mirror, showing me the welts that had flared up on my butt and the backs of my legs. I heaved in air although I never shed a tear. It was the weirdest thing. I cried, screaming in pain, but not once did a tear escape my eyes.

I hadn’t even noticed that I had drifted downstream. I wasn’t even in eyeshot of the family with the little girl, different like me. She was the same because she looked different, but she was different because she was loved.

I realized after a few moments that I was past the little beach huts where Sam stayed. I had drifted at least two miles without even noticing. Letting my head fall back, I wet my hair and replaced the thought of Adriana with Sam. A couple more hours and he would be there. That wasn’t the best thing to think about, either. Thoughts of Sam went right to my pussy, and I was now at a section of the beach full of people. It was a public part of the beach, unlike my private section for the elite.

The crowd of people did little to stop the beating going on in my clitoris. It intensified it. I ran my hand over the cloth between my legs and looked around at the group of people. Betting I could play with myself right there without notice, I pushed my fingers through the top of my bikini bottoms. Hmmm, even the salt water couldn’t wash away the slippery moistness between my legs.

I spread myself wide, and slipped in a finger, and then two, knowing no one was paying attention. If there were eyes closer, they could see, maybe that’s what made it so erotic. I was finger fucking my pussy, right there around a crowd of people and I loved it. I dropped my legs and focused on my clit when I caught the stare of a college kid looking at me. He knew what I was doing, but I didn’t stop. I stared right in his eyes until my lips parted and I shuddered in the water, riding out my waves with the ocean.

And just like that, I pulled myself from the water, ignoring the mouthwatering youngster, and walked back along the sand. Revived from my needed orgasm, I focused my mind back to business. The way I saw it, I had exactly five weeks before Sam left and we parted ways. That was plenty of time. I just had to make sure the day was timed just right. Did I tell him about the divorce, or did I let him think I was going home?

I had to walk forever back to my house. It was crazy how fast the current could take you away versus how long it took you to walk back. I could have stayed in the water and fought the current, but I was tired of fighting the current. I was doing things my way from now on. It would either work in my favor or it wouldn’t, regardless, I had to try.

I walked up and down the beach where I left my pile of clothes. I knew they were right there, close to Sam’s. Who the hell would steal my clothes?

“You looking for these?” Sam asked, raising his sunglasses and holding my clothes. Jesus, I shouldn’t miss him this much. I smiled and walked the few steps to him. Leaning my half-naked body into his, I kissed him. Sam wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me to him. God, his arms were heaven. I had a hint of sadness for a second, realizing it was all going to end soon, but it would be worth it in the end, and I would get what I wanted.

“I missed you,” Sam said, kissing the tip of my nose.

“I missed you, too…too much,” I admitted.

I started to lead Sam toward my house by his hand, but he stopped me by pulling back. “My place is closer,” he teased. Damn, had I known he was going to be early, I would have held off on the orgasm, not that it mattered. I was already feeling wet just thinking about it.

“Fine, but I have to jump in the shower. I have sand down there.”

“You have sand down there? How do you know?”

“I feel it in my suit.”

“I have this amazing showerhead to take care of that,” Sam said, pulling me in a quick stride.

Sam was right. He did have an amazing showerhead. I stood in front him while he pulled the two strings, one on my neck and one around my back. I giggled, seeing the sand there, too. Sam kissed my right nipple that was already standing at full attention, and dropped to his knees. He slowly, slid my bottoms down, exposing my light colored, curly mound. I was sure my clitoris was swollen above the hair. Rubbing the backs of my legs, Sam kissed my hairline and sucked in a breath from his nostrils. I was sure he was smelling me.

“Sit on the edge of the tub,” he rasped.

I sat and opened my legs without being told. Sam pushed my knees together and adjusted the water to a rather hot temperature. Holding my breath, I felt the hot water rinse the sand from between my breasts. I hissed when Sam adjusted the nozzle to a painful stream, directed right at my nipple. The sensation was intense beyond words. I’m pretty sure I could have come without him even touching my wet, throbbing pussy.

“Open your legs,” he whispered, filling the little cup with blue mouthwash. I opened myself for him and he opened me more, splitting me with two fingers. The tingling sensation was immediate. I couldn’t help but touch myself, wanting to come. Sam moved my hand but didn’t make me wait. He rinsed away the sand in the crevices between my legs with the rain setting. I noticeably opened my legs more, wanting the stream to hit me right where it throbbed.