Desires (5 page)

Pretend he’s not
there,
she advised herself.
But he is,
she argued back
.
In
the end, her hands, despairing of her pathetic indecisive brain, decided the
matter and headed north by themselves. One brush of her fingers against her
sensitive nipples and she wondered why she’d ever doubted Dan. Her breasts were
swollen and responsive. She let out a tiny involuntary noise as she cupped both
breasts together, squeezing them, sending pulses running around her body like
shockwaves. An image came into her head of Dan moving behind her, taking over,
touching her, fondling her. The thought shocked her to the extent that she
almost stopped, but after a second, decided to go with the fantasy. Fantasy Dan
placed his hands on either side of her waist, sliding them across her stomach
and up to her breasts. He caressed her breasts and lifted them up, rubbing his
thumbs over them.

Then she nearly jumped ten feet in the air when she felt
real, warm, man’s hands on her waist. “Keep your eyes closed,” she heard him
say. She felt Dan’s fingers stroke her waist through her blouse, then his
fingers moved away. She almost protested, but then she felt him start to
unfasten the buttons of her blouse. Her own fingers froze.

“Are you okay with this?” he said, pausing.

Am I?
Stacie wasn't sure, but her head nodded all by itself and Dan
continued with the buttons. Her only thought then was that she wished she’d
worn a sexier bra, but then she’d thought she was coming here for an
appointment. She hadn’t expected to start straightaway. The blouse slithered
off her shoulders and she wondered if Dan would take off her bra also. Dread
and hope warred within her, and the disappointment when he made no move to do
so cut deep.

Stacie kept her rhythm, moving her fingertips over her
lace-encased flesh, the sensations even more intense through one less layer of
material. Her nipples poked hard through the bra cup and she tweaked them
between her fingertips. She found herself grinding into the bed, pussy
twitching, whilst her fingertips ran over her ultra-sensitive skin.

She wished Dan would come back. She wanted to feel those
warm hands on her again. She half-opened her mouth to ask him, then chickened
out.

But there was no stopping her fantasies. Her mind ran
crazy, as she continued to touch and knead and caress her breasts. She heard
Dan moving away from the edge of his stool and her heart almost leapt out of
her throat. Stacie held her breath.

She felt him move behind her on the bed.
Touch me!
her mind screamed. She felt
his hands on her back, unclasping her bra. Stacie moved her hands from her
breasts, allowing the bra to drop onto her lap.
Now. Touch me now!
She leaned back into him, feeling the heat of
his body behind her. But he still made no move to touch her so she seized her own
breasts, imagining him lowering her to the bed and taking her. She floated her
fingertips over her aroused nipples sending white-hot sensations bolting around
her body. She pinched harder, the pain pleasurable. Her pussy throbbed almost
unbearably, seemingly on a direct link from her breasts.

She couldn’t stop one hand from dropping to her pussy,
rubbing wildly through her skirt. Instantly, her body was overwhelmed with
arousal. She lunged her hips forward, shuddering with eruption. Stacie ground her
lower pelvis against her hand whilst pinching her nipple with the other. Her
hips lunged high off the bed and sweat prickled over her body. Her entire body
was on fire and out of control.

Stacie let out a shuddering exhale as the peak died away
and she flopped back against Dan, trying hard to catch her breath. She felt her
racing heartbeat begin to slow.

She felt Dan’s hands patting her upper arms, then he put
her forward slightly and moved away from behind her. Stacie could hear him
rummaging around. She lay on her side, taking deep breaths to calm her body
down. With reluctance, she opened her eyes, staring directly in front of her.
How could she look at him?

“I think you need this.” Dan sat back down on the little
stool opposite the bed and passed her some water. “How was that?”

Stacie took the glass from him. She had a sip of the
water, and let her gaze flick briefly to his before resting on the floor again.
There was no repugnance on his face, no ridicule, just a soft, happy smile.

“It was amazing. It blew me away.” Stacie found her
embarrassment draining.

“Good. You did really well.”

Chapter Two

Stacie hadn’t slept a wink. Her mind churned with
thoughts of last night, and Dan.

Stacie stared at the phone. Should she call the club?
Impulsively she picked it up, then tossed it back on the bed and threw her head
back on her pillow. Thoughts of last night once more filled her mind and she
sat back up. The phone drew her eye again, sitting innocently, and yet
enticingly on the bedside table. “Oh God, what am I doing?”

She grabbed the phone as if it might suddenly disappear,
found the number for Desires and pressed the call button, only to stop the call
as soon as it had begun to ring.

“Come on, Stacie, sort yourself out…do it…call the damn
place,” she chastised herself, frustrated with her own indecisiveness.

She dialled again and waited for the reply.

“Desires, how may I help you?” said a young female voice.

“Hi…sorry…I was wondering…I was at the club last night
and well…I had my first session. And I was wondering if I could book again?”

“Of course. Could I have your name and identity code?”
Stacie gave the receptionist the information. “You were with Dan?”

“Yes. Do you know when the next session would be?”

“I’ll just check his schedule for you,” the woman told
her. Stacie anxiously waited for her answer. “Well, he’s not down for working
at the club tonight…” she began.

“Oh,” Stacie blurted, disappointed.

“But I could call him to see if he can come in to see
you,” the woman said.

“Okay. It isn’t urgent or anything.”

“It’s not a problem. I’m sure he’ll be happy to see you
if he can. What did you have in mind?”

Stacie paused. She wanted more than just a quickie. She
wanted to spend time with him, get to know him. “How much would it cost from
dinner this evening through to lunchtime tomorrow?”

“I will just check for you.”

Stacie wasn’t entirely sure if she was doing the right
thing, but she knew if she walked away from the club that would be it. She would
slip back into her boring life and be alone and never have the confidence to do
anything.

“That would be eight hundred pounds.”

“Pardon?” Stacie knew it would be expensive but eight
hundred…?

“Eight hundred pounds,” the receptionist obligingly repeated.

Stacie was suddenly unsure. It was a
lot
of money.

“Are you still there, Miss Clifford?”

“Sorry…just thinking. Just…just give me a moment.” Stacie
considered her options. She had the money. She’d got a decent chunk from the
divorce settlement and she’d been working shedloads of overtime this last year with
very little time to spend it.
Just do it!

“Okay, I’d like to book that please, if Dan’s
available.”

“No problem,” the receptionist replied. “I will call
Dan, and get back to you as soon as possible, Miss Clifford.”

Stacie made herself go into the kitchen and make a cup
of coffee. Sitting by the phone waiting for it to ring was a little bit sad.

It rang just as she was pouring the hot water into the
mug. She dashed into the bedroom and threw herself across the bed to pick it up
before it stopped. “Hello, Stacie Clifford,” she answered breathlessly.

“Hello, Miss Clifford, it’s Shannon at Desires here. I
have spoken to Dan, and he’s available for you in two hours.”

“That soon?” Stacie was shocked.

“Would you like me to call him and make it later?”

“No…that’ll be fine,” Stacie said, suddenly excited to
see Dan sooner than she had thought.

“When you arrive, you can use your identity code to gain
access to the building, now you’re a member. If that’s everything, Miss
Clifford, we will see you soon.”

Two hours! Stacie didn’t have much time to get ready.
She jumped in the shower and scrubbed herself clean. She blow dried her hair
then straightened it. Make-up could wait till she got back. She had to buy some
new underwear and clothes. It was surprising how one evening had made her
totally rethink her dress sense. She had to get some sexier bras. She threw on
some clothes, downed her now-cold coffee with a grimace and grabbed a cereal
bar for breakfast, before heading out to the shops.

She picked up a couple of matching lingerie sets, one in
classic red and black, and one encrusted with diamantés. It looked like it
might be a little scratchy, but the effect was stunning.

She dithered over the ‘right’ sort of clothes for a
while. Angel had said she hid all her best assets. Her skirt had been too long
and her blouse too high. She didn’t want to go too far the other way, but
perhaps she could show off a little more. She found a flippy little red skater
skirt which hung to just above the knee and accentuated her waist whilst hiding
her little belly. She’d never thought of herself as fat, but Graham had used to
poke her tummy and call it her “beer belly”. He used to wobble it and yell,
“FAAAAAAT,” as she lay in bed. And, if she got upset, he’d turn over in a huff
and say he was only joking and she needed to get a sense of humour transplant.

She found a close-fitting black top with cap sleeves and
a sweetheart neckline that showed a little more boob than the tops she usually
wore, especially with her new push-'em-up-and-squash-'em-together bras.

She looked at stockings in the hosiery department, but
lost her nerve at the last second. Maybe she could do stockings another time.

Stacie headed back to her rented one-bedroom, second
floor flat. The décor was typical of a rented flat, white bathroom, and the open-plan
living, dining and kitchen area painted uniformly magnolia, as was her plain
bedroom. Dull, dull, dull, unlike the sumptuous rooms at Desires.

Stacie dashed into the bedroom and quickly applied some
make-up before pulling on her new outfit. She twirled in the mirror. She
actually looked pretty good. It was a long time since she had taken so much
care in getting ready for a man.

At the beginning of their marriage she used to get
dressed up for Graham on the rare occasions they went out, but when she came
downstairs looking pretty, his lip would curl. He’d mutter something about
mutton dressed as lamb, and he didn’t know who she thought she was trying to
impress. One memorable time, he’d gone to the toilet and a man had come over to
talk to her. She’d been polite but when Graham came out and saw her smiling at
this other man, he had gone ballistic. He’d taken her home and accused her of
sleeping with him. When she stuttered that he only asked her the time, he
grabbed her by the neck and pushed her up against the wall. How dare she lie to
him? She was a slut, a whore. Just look at the way she was dressed. She’d
obviously encouraged this man. It was clear she was up for the taking. Then he
dragged her upstairs and…well, she didn’t like to think of what he’d done to
her. It was his right, as her husband. He’d told her that afterward.

She’d never dressed up for him after that.

Stacie pushed the disturbing memories from her head and
concentrated on the future, on her forthcoming time with Dan. But her happy thoughts
were marred by the memory of what Angel said to her. “No feelings for your
tutor…”

Confused, Stacie examined her feelings. Dan was a nice
young man and she had enjoyed spending time with him. It was no more than that.
It was normal to have some sort of feelings surely. How could she not have some
form of feelings for a man she was showing her body to? It wasn’t as if she was
going to spend time with someone she disliked.

She packed a few changes of clothing and some toiletries
into her small overnight case. Forget Angel. She would have a fantastic day and
evening with Dan. Excitement fluttered in her belly as she wondered what his
next session would involve. After her initial embarrassment, she was stunned to
realize how much she had enjoyed the previous session. She was ready for more.

Stacie threw her bag in the car and drove to Desires.
She parked her car and regarded the old Georgian building. Once more a tiny
niggle of doubt lurked in the corner of her mind, but she squashed it.
Come on, girl, we’re over this now.
She
climbed out the car and grabbed her handbag from the back seat, deciding to
leave the case in the car.

It was another cold day and she quickly made her way to
the main entrance, digging out her phone for the identity code. She punched it in
and the door released. Her steps more confident than yesterday, she walked down
to the reception area.

A different receptionist greeted Stacie. This one had short
dark hair, black-framed glasses similar to Angel’s, and wore a pinstripe suit.
“Good afternoon, Stacie, how are you today?”