Desert Rain (17 page)

Before Linc set Holly on her feet, he shut the door to the master bedroom and shot the
bolt. Impatiently he pulled off his tie, tossed it over a chair and unbuttoned his shirt.
He pulled a foil packet out of his pants pocket, unzipped his pants, and kicked them aside.

Holly watched with a combination of hunger and confusion.

What are you waiting for? Linc asked. Take off your clothes.

His hands went to the waistband of his underwear. He peeled off his briefs, tossed them
aside, and ripped open the foil packet.

Quickly she turned her back. She had seen him without clothes in the camp tent, but that
had been different, intimate and warm and exciting.

This was like watching a stranger undress.

Suddenly she felt Linc behind her. His naked strength pressed against her while his
fingers closed possessively over the taut curves of her hips.

Hurry up, he said in a husky voice, or Ill take you right here, right now. Or is that how
you like it?

Her hands trembled toward the zipper hidden beneath a fold of silk at the back of the
dress. Accidentally her fingers touched his rigid, aroused flesh.

She jerked back as though burned.

Lincs breath hissed out. He wanted nothing more than to wrap Hollys fingers around him in
a lovers caress.

But she was acting like she had never seen a naked man before, much less touched one.

Knock it off, Shannon, he said impatiently. Youre no more a shivering virgin than I am.

She spun and faced him.

I didnt lie to you, she said. Her voice shook with intensity. Ive never made love with
anyone but you.

Uh-huh, he said. His tone said just the opposite. Lincs hand found the zipper on Hollys
dress and yanked it down. Black silk slid to the floor. She wore nothing beneath but black
lace bikinis. What control Linc had burned up with the desire that had been devouring him.

Effortlessly he lifted her. His impatient fingers pulled off the band of black lace
briefs. His mouth descended, forcing her lips apart. His hands clamped over her hips,
lifting her against him with the same careless strength he had used earlier on the dance
floor.

The intimate contact surprised Holly. She didnt know how to respond or what he expected
from her. The arousal she had felt earlier gave way to confusion. What do you want me to
do? she asked uncertainly. Linc made a disgusted sound.

What do you think? he asked. I dont know! Crap. With that, he carried her across the room
and dumped her on the bed. Before she could say a word, she

was pinned beneath his weight.

Linc she began.

His mouth closed over hers, shutting off any questions, any protests, anything at all. His
hands raked over every bit of her body, demanding a response that she was too
inexperienced to give. His weight and intensity overwhelmed her.

After a few minutes Holly didnt move.

He swore and braced himself on his elbows, looking down at her with eyes that had no
color, simply darkness.

Its better if you cooperate, he said.

I dont know what you want, she said desperately.

The hell you dont, Shannon. I want exactly what you promised when you held your arms out
to me in Palm Springs and begged me to dothis.

His hips drove against Holly. There was an instant of tearing pain that made her cry out.
A stunned look came over Lincs face. For a long moment he simply stared down at her white
face. With an agonized sound, he withdrew and rolled off her. My God, Holly, he said
raggedly. Im sorry. I thought you were His voice broke. With a choked sound he tried to
gather her into his arms. No,she said wildly. Holly jerked over onto her side, her back to
Linc. Shivering, she huddled around herself like a child. He lay without touching her,
fighting to control the emotions raging through him. He had been so sure she wasnt a
virgin. And so wrong. The realization almost destroyed him. Holly, he whispered. I . . .
When his hand smoothed her hair away from her face, she flinched and retreated. Very
gently he rolled her rigid body over until she faced him once more. Holly, he began. If
youre finished, she interrupted in a clear, childlike voice, Id like to take a bath.

Linc would have preferred sarcasm or screams or tears to Hollys simple statement of fact.

He had made her feel unclean.

Holly . . . dont.

His voice was as ragged as hers had been clear. His hands trembled as he tried to comfort
her.

With an inarticulate cry, she shoved him away and ran for the bedroom door. She was too
upset to realize that it was still bolted shut. She tugged on the knob with both hands
like a child.

Then Holly saw the bolt.

She clawed at it, breaking her nails in her haste as she finally unlocked the door.

Lincs hand shot past her shoulder, slamming the door shut again before she could get out.
His other hand flattened against the wall, holding Holly captive between his arms without
actually touching her.

His broken breathing stirred her hair like a caress.

She shuddered.

No more, she said in a raw voice. I should have told you I was Shannon and you should have
believed I was a virgin. But I didnt and you didnt. Were even. Now let me go.

He made a hoarse sound of anguish. His hand shook as he stroked the midnight fall of her
hair.

Holly

My name is Shannon,she interrupted savagely.

Linc made a noise not unlike Hollys as she had clawed at the bolt, but he didnt let her
open the door.

For long moments there was no sound but his broken breathing. When he finally spoke, his
voice was so changed it made tears burn behind Hollys eyelids.

I cant let you go, Linc said raggedly. Youd never come back.

Holly shuddered again.

I cant live with that, he said, with what I did to you, hurting you because I didnt
believe you and Id wanted you for so long. Too long. Too much. Im so sorry I hurt you. So
damned sorry . . .

He made a choked sound and fought to control his emotions. He wasnt wholly successful.

The feel of a single tear dropping onto her shoulder shocked Holly all the way to her soul.

Slowly she slumped against the bedroom door as though she wished she could sink into its
wooden pores and vanish.

I was told my first time would hurt, she said dully.

Not as much. Not if I had taken more time to arouse you.

Holly felt the hard, cool wood of the door on her forehead. Only the raggedness of Lincs
voice gave her the courage to keep on talking.

It wouldnt have mattered, she said.

Like hell it wouldnt.

Forget it, she said dully. Its not all your fault. Ive been told time and again that Im
frigid. I finally believe it.

Frigid?

At first Linc thought Holly was joking.

The defeated line of her body told him she wasnt. He would have laughed if he could, but
he was too shocked.

Holly, you are the most wonderfully sensual woman Ive ever known, he said finally.

Uh-huh.

Her cynical tone was an exact echo of his earlier response when she had told him she was a
virgin.

Its true, Linc said. I had a hard enough time believing you were a virgin when you were
Holly. When you were Shannon . . . my God . . . He took a swift, broken breath. Impossible.

Why do you think I was a virgin whether Holly or Shannon? she asked bitterly. I didnt want
men. You wanted me. Not enough. Not tonight. I didnt give you a chance.

He lifted her like a child in his arms, ignoring her protest and the stiffness of her
body. Please, Linc, she said hoarsely. Please, stop. I cant take any more. He brushed the
top of her head with his lips. I wont hurt you, he promised. It will never be like that
again.

It will never be, period. Dont you understand? Im frigid! Holly couldnt see Lincs smile.
Put me down, she said.

Not yet. I wont do anything you dont want me to. I promise. Trust me, Holly. Idid,once...
Her whisper was more for herself than for him, but he heard. He froze, finishing the rest
of her sentence in his mind even though she said nothing at all. She trusted me once and
then I violated that trust.

Linc took a deep, broken breath.

I trusted someone called Holly, he said when his voice steadied. I want to trust her
again. Its so easy to trust the first time, but the second . . . ?

She went still as she understood what he was asking from her now. Not sex. Trust. Again.

Just as she wanted him to trust her.

Again.

Motionless, Linc waited for the longest moments of his life, straining to hear Hollys
answer.

It didnt come in words. Slowly she became less stiff in his arms. She didnt rest her cheek
on his chest, but neither did she show him only the back of her head.

Letting out a long breath of relief, he carried her past the bed and into the bathroom.

The Jacuzzi steamed quietly, surrounded by lush ferns and wooden containers thick with
exotic flowers. Lights hidden amid the greenery glowed like fallen stars.

Slowly Linc set Holly on her feet, supporting her until her legs stopped trembling. Then
he opened counter drawers until he found a hairbrush.

Gently he brushed her hair until there were no more tangles in the shining mass. With deft
motions, he gathered the strands into a single long braid.

Youre good at that, she said.

Her voice was shaky, almost unrecognizable, but Linc didnt care. He was too relieved that
she was willing to speak to him.

I practiced a lot on Beth, he said.

For a time Holly stood without moving, watching herself and Linc reflected in the mirrored
walls. She didnt see her own beauty, the feminine curves of breasts and hips and waist,
the tawny rose of nipples against her smooth golden skin, the lush midnight hair below her
shadowed navel.

Holly saw only Lincs face, gentle again.

She also saw the strength that coiled beneath his skin with every motion of his body.

He secured the braid on top of her head with the same twist of gold she had worn before.
When he was finished, he rested his hands lightly on her shoulders.

His eyes met hers in the mirror for the space of several heartbeats. Then looked at the
rest of her as though he had never seen a woman before.

Holly forgot to breathe, waiting for Lincs hands to follow his eyes.

When his hands stayed on her shoulders, she didnt know whether she was relieved or
disappointed.

Both,Holly admitted to herself.But mostly relieved.

She was a bit frightened of his strength now.

Linc saw the wariness in Hollys eyes. It hurt, even though he knew he deserved it.

Tenderly his fingers interlaced with hers. As he led her toward the water, he flipped a
switch on the wall.

Suddenly jets of water made dazzling silver swirls in the Jacuzzi. Bubbles fizzed and
sizzled like a conspiracy of laughter.

Without pausing, Linc walked into the water. He didnt turn toward Holly until he was
clothed to the waist in brilliant, opaque bubbles.

Tension eased a bit in her. She hadnt known until this moment that part of her dreaded
confronting his nakedness again.

Then she understood that somehow he had known how she felt before she did. Watch the first
step Linc began. its a lulu, Holly finished, surprising both of them with her wry words.
He smiled, took her hand, and lifted her fingertips to his lips.

Its also slippery, he said.

When he was certain that she wouldnt lose her balance, he released her hand. He didnt want
her to feel restrained in any way by him.

Never again. The thought of how he had taken her before was like a knife turning in him.

There are benches built in at two levels, Linc said, sitting down on the lower one. Youre
probably tall enough to sit down here without drowning in bubbles.

Holly hesitated, then sat at a midpoint on the lower level. She wasnt next to him. Nor was
she as far away from him as she could get.

Linc noted every inch of the difference.

Bubbles frothed up to Hollys chin, hiding her behind their silver dance.

Too cold? he asked, seeing her lips tremble.

Just nerves, she said in a strained voice.

I wont

I know, she interrupted quickly.

But did she?

He stretched out his long legs beneath the water, bracing himself on the lower bench on
the opposite side. He let his head lie back on the padded rim and closed his eyes.

For a time Holly watched him covertly, comparing his face with that of the ruthless
stranger who had taken Lincs place when he saw Shannon instead of Holly.

But now Lincs mouth was no longer a thin, sardonic twist. His jaw was relaxed instead of
tightened in a grim thrust of male aggression. His unfair strength was concealed beneath a
gleaming froth of bubbles that fizzed and shifted each second.

Holly shivered again, a tremor of muscles that were slowly relaxing. With a sigh, she
rested her head against the padded rim of the Jacuzzi and let the waters heat claim her.

For several minutes there was no sound but that of the bright water seething over their
bodies.

The swirling water was alive with mischief, teasing Hollys legs with a promise of support,
then gently floating her toward the center of the Jacuzzi if she gave in.

She braced her arms along the rim. Goose-flesh formed as the cooler air of the room poured
over her skin. Her legs floated out and bumped against Linc.

She froze.

His eyes didnt open, nor did his position change. If he had noticed the accidental
brushing of skin against skin, he didnt show it.

The third time her feet drifted into his legs, she made a frustrated sound. The Jacuzzi
had been built for his six-foot four-inch length. He could brace himself comfortably
against the swirling currents, but she couldnt.

Go ahead and put your feet on my leg, Linc offered. Youll be more comfortable that way.
Startled, Holly glanced at his face. His eyes were still closed. After a few moments of
hesitation, she let her legs float out again.