Departures (24 page)

ou didn’t have to hold his hand,” Jana said, giving Sierra a whap on the thigh. They were lying on the dock in the late afternoon sun, resting up for the evening events. It was just the two of them, with no one around to hear. Gregg and Tim had gone over to Danny’s to combine their fireworks and set up everything on the Morrisons’ dock for a combined Fourth of July fireworks show.

“Ouch,” Sierra said. “You don’t have to hit me.”

“There I am, recovering on the beach from my traumatic experience—”

Sierra broke in laughing and repeated, “Your traumatic experience.”

“And I gaze up from where I’ve washed ashore, looking like a beached whale, I’m sure.”

“Not even close to a beached whale,” Sierra said.

“I look up and there, against the perfect, pristine blue of the wide Montana sky, what do I see but you holding hands with Danny Morrison!”

“We were jumping!” Sierra protested. “What was I supposed to say? ‘Oh, thank you for the offer to hold your hand while we jump,
Danny. You’re a kind, considerate gentleman, but you know what? My friend Jana over there might see us, and it would be more traumatic than the last traumatic experience she had when she wouldn’t let go of the bail bucket—’ ”

“Hey!” Jana jumped in, sitting up and socking Sierra again in the thigh. “At least I don’t go around knocking out poor, innocent airport employees!”

They both laughed.

“You gave me a bruise,” Sierra whined. “One good bruise deserves another. Where do you want yours?” She sat up and faced Jana with her fist ready to strike.

“You already gave me a bruise! You bruised my poor heart when you let Danny hold your hand!” Jana wailed playfully. “Life is so unfair!”

“Oh, listen to you! You changed your mind about him faster than anyone I’ve ever seen.”

“I did not,” Jana said.

“You did too! How am I supposed to keep up with you? Yesterday it was, ‘I’m going into the woods, and I’m going to bag me one Danny Morrison and bring him home on a silver platter.’ Then you see him, and you realize his body has grown faster than his social skills.”

Jana laughed. “I got a little spooked being around him at first.”

“I guess,” Sierra said with sarcasm.

“He’s younger than I am, you know,” Jana said.

“So? That didn’t seem to be a problem for you in the middle of last night.”

“What do you think about Danny? Honestly,” Jana asked.

“I think he needs another year to grow up.”

“Unless maybe he had someone to help him along,” Jana suggested.

“Let me see, who could we find to take on such a project?” Sierra struck a pose, as if she were thinking hard.

“All in all, I think he’s a nice guy,” Jana said.

“I think so too,” Sierra agreed. “I admit, once he quit pulling my hair, he was a lot of fun. Jumping off the rock with him was great. But what about your plans for a summer romance with Tim?”

“I think Tim thinks I’m too young for him. Which I’m not, but my brother makes me look that way in front of him.”

“I think that’s the way Tim views me as well,” Sierra said.

“He really is a nice guy,” Jana said. “And cute in a snuggly kind of way.”

“Is it my imagination, or is one of us changing her mind every twelve seconds?”

“Come on, Sierra. Don’t be so critical. This is all part of it.”

“Part of what?”

“Part of figuring out life. You know, leaving childhood and venturing into the wild, wonderful world of womanhood.”

Sierra laughed. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“You know what I mean. You said it last night. It’s time to blossom. I’m just trying to figure out what that involves. And if it means giving Danny another chance, then I should do it.”

“Another chance? I never noticed you giving him a first chance.”

“I told you. I got spooked.”

“Oh.” Sierra paused for a moment and then with a giggle turned to Jana and said, “Boo!”

“Very funny. You can stay on the little girl side if you want, Sierra, but I’m going to step over into womanhood this summer.”

“And what exactly does that mean?” Sierra said, examining Jana’s expression more carefully.

“It’s nothing outrageous. All I’m saying is that I want to figure out how to act around guys and maybe figure out how they feel about me. That’s all.”

“Take it slow,” Sierra cautioned.

“Sierra!” Jana said with a twinge of irritation. “I think I have taken this whole guy thing pretty slow when I’m sixteen and just now trying out my relationship wings.”

“Well, I think there are some definite advantages to lingering on the girl side a little longer. Once we step over to the woman side, it’s not likely we can ever turn around and go back,” Sierra said, stretching out her legs.

“And why would we want to go back?” Jana asked.

“Good point.”

They lounged contentedly in the warm sunshine, with the soothing sound of the lake echoing off the underside of the dock. Overhead, the wide Montana sky spread its gorgeous blue wings.

“I never told you about the verse I read last night when I came out here on the dock,” Sierra said. “It was in Daniel. If I remember correctly, the verse said, ‘Those who have insight will shine brightly like the expanse of heaven, and those who lead others to righteousness, like the stars forever and ever.’ Isn’t that poetic?”

“Poetic?” Jana said.

“Yes. I thought it was last night. And today I thought the trip on the river seemed like our journey through life. Some parts of the trip
are easy floats and some parts we have to paddle over the rough stuff.”

“And what about the parts when you go over the side?” Jana asked.

“I guess that’s when you follow the emergency instructions and keep going, feet first.”

“Now that’s poetic,” Jana said. “You’re becoming a shining star of insight, Sierra.”

They both laughed. A contented silence came over them for a few minutes before Jana’s mom called to them from the grass. “We plan to leave in fifteen minutes to go over to the Morrisons’.”

Jana jumped up and said, “They sure didn’t give us much notice!” She took off for the cabin while Sierra reluctantly left her perfect napping spot on the dock.

They were both ready to go in the allotted fifteen minutes. Jana put her hand on the doorknob of their room and stopped. She leaned closer to Sierra. “I think I’m ready to be around Danny and not get spooked. Wish me the best.”

Sierra smiled at her friend but felt sad and a little out of order inside. Jana was ready to move ahead without Sierra. And Sierra wasn’t sure how she felt about that.

he big Montana sky was fading from blue to a deep lapis shade as the group congregated on the dock in front of the Morrisons’ big house. Sierra settled in, cozy and contented, on a lawn chair with a blanket around her. Danny and his dad were at the end of the dock with Gregg and Tim, preparing to set the night sky on fire with their combined fireworks.

“We need a little cannonball music,” Mr. Morrison said over his shoulder to the audience lined up for the show.

Mr. Hill began to hum the “William Tell Overture.”

“I don’t think that’s what he means,” Mrs. Hill told her husband.

The “pyros,” as Mrs. Hill called the guys, had strung up a long line of fireworks and appeared to have a definite plan of attack.

“Are we ready, gang?” Mr. Morrison asked.

“Ready!” they answered.

Sierra looked up into the star-flecked sky. The first star of the night was there again, winking at her. She winked back. For a brief moment, Sierra thought what a pity it was to ruin what she considered to be a much better light show than anything these guys could come up with.

An echoing boom sounded from somewhere across the lake. The first fireworks of the night. The boom served as a starting gun for Mr. Morrison, as he lit three punks with his pocket lighter and ceremoniously handed a punk to Danny and one to Gregg. Mr. Morrison held the third one, and the guys lifted the long, slow-burning punks in the air as proudly as if they were holding the Olympic torch in their sweaty fists.

“Let the show begin,” Mr. Morrison declared.

With that, the three of them bent down in unison and lit one firework after another after another. Three seconds later, the first one exploded above the lake, sprinkling its red and white twinkles into the thin air.

The first one had barely begun its descent when the second one burst dazzlingly before their eyes. Then the third and the fourth and so on, until Sierra lost count somewhere after the fourteenth one.

Without even a moment’s pause to “ooh” or “aah” before the next spray of colored glitter in the sky, Sierra stopped trying to find the little-girl wonder that she usually felt every Fourth of July. Instead, she felt sadness like the cloud of smoke that was forming over the end of the dock and was more visible with each firework that lit up.

Am I more woman than little girl? I’m away from home and my family for a holiday. That’s the first time I’ve ever done that. I’m traveling almost on my own. I’m almost, sort of, kind of being noticed more by guys. I guess in some ways, I am leaving my girlhood behind
.

The thought made her sad. She didn’t want to rush into anything, especially a relationship that was more than just buddies. She watched Tim and remembered how he had lit her cattail the night before. That had seemed like such a romantic gesture to her then. Right now, Tim
was just one of the guys. Nothing he did or said held special interest for her.

Back and forth, off and on. Feelings sure are funny. But I think everything I’m feeling is normal
.

Sierra glanced over at Jana, who had joined Danny at the end of the dock. She was saying something to him, pointing to the fireworks that had just gone off. Danny appeared to be enjoying the attention.

Sierra noticed that Jana’s mom was watching Jana as she interacted with Danny. Her mom had a happy, proud look on her face.

Look at Jana. She got over being spooked pretty easily. I wonder if being six months older than I am makes a difference in how she feels about guys
.

Whatever the reason, Jana looked as if she was about to blossom. And she was going to blossom before Sierra did. Or maybe they were both blossoming, but in different ways. It could be they were both finding their voices, their styles, what was really important to them but just via different rivers. Sierra realized she was content to float for a while. She knew there would be plenty of significant rapids ahead.

What she wanted most from her blossoming season this summer was insight. She wanted her life to shine like the stars forever and ever. And that’s what she told God in her whispered prayer as the fireworks grand finale blazed across the sky. She had started this vacation expecting to have a little adventure and some fun. In her opinion, there was still room for more of both.

“Bravo!” Sierra said, standing and applauding after the last sprinkling of color fell from the sky. “Perfecto! Magnifico! Brilliant-o!” With each word, she took a step closer to Gregg, who was overdoing his bow for the audience.

Sierra was right next to him at the end of the now empty dock as Gregg took his last bow.