Delta Force Desire (12 page)

She couldn't grow another year older and remain a virgin. When she finally found a boyfriend, a real, flesh-and-blood man, how would she explain to him her lack of experience? It wasn't a religious or cultural belief. It was a sad part of her social life that made her feel pathetic.

Would she have wanted to lose her virginity in the back of someone's truck in high school? No. Would she be willing to lose it to Griffin anytime, anyplace? An adamant yes. She needed to know she could go through with it and carry that confidence with her. She would seduce him tonight.

She turned in her chair and faced him. A hot shower and then she would find time alone with him. The benefit of being on this base was that while she had nothing to do when she wasn't working, neither did he. They just had each other.

“Why didn't you sign the confidentiality agreement?” Griffin asked.

“They need me. I don't need them. I don't need to agree to do more. I'm giving this a chance, but I'm not signing away my life.” She had learned her lesson about that from the last time.

“I like this side of you. You've been bolder.”

“Experience. I've been down this road. I know that I have some power. And on that note, I'm done for tonight. I need a break.”

She and Griffin were escorted to their two-bedroom apartment, and Kit was pleased the dinners she had requested were on the table in their small kitchen.

Griffin sat, but he seemed distracted.

She carried the silver plate toppers to the sink. “Want to talk about it?” The sight and smell of the food should have tempted him. Grilled steak, sweet potatoes and steamed broccoli sat on their plates. He hadn't picked up his fork.

“About what?” he asked.

Why did he want to play dumb? Something was on his mind. “Are you upset that I want to sleep with you?”

“No.”

Despite what he said, she heard the “yes” in his voice. An attack of conscience? Marissa had told her that men liked to eat and then have sex. Should she wait for Griffin to eat before she advanced on him?

Would he resist?

Fearing she would lose her cool or be struck by an attack of nerves if she waited, she strode to him and kissed him. His mouth opened under hers slowly, and he tipped his head back, getting a deeper angle on her mouth. She pulled away. “I'm planning to seduce you.”

He lifted a brow. “You don't have to tell me. Your actions are clear.”

Kit wouldn't let him make this into a joke. She knew what she wanted. With trembling hands, she removed her shirt and tossed it to the floor. Then she removed her pants and let them drop. She stepped out of them.

“Come with me,” she said, and wiggled a finger at him, beckoning for him to follow her.

He stood. She pulled away the comforter and blankets and patted the bed next to her.

Griffin sat. Now what? He was allowing her to take the lead, but it would ease her anxiety if he would make this happen. They both wanted it, so why wait? She leaned forward to kiss him again and shivered when his hand went to her shoulder, stopping her.

“Don't make me say no to you. Let's eat,” he said.

The sting of his rejection burned through her. She didn't want to eat, so she went for broke. “I am tired of being untouched.” After what Griffin had done to her, she couldn't claim she was untouched. It seemed a silly distinction. They had crossed the line. Might as well stay over it and have some fun.

Griffin's eyes swerved from her face to her body. He swore under his breath. “Have you lost it?”

“Please touch me.”

He stood from the bed and crossed the room in two long strides. “Kit, I have been thinking about touching you since the moment we met. Where your waist dips in makes me crazy. I want to fit my hands there and hold you.”

“Then kiss me,” she said. She was completely aroused. She wanted this. “Kiss me or I will find someone who will. I'd guess there are plenty of men here who would love the company of a woman for the night.” A low blow, but she wasn't pulling punches.

He narrowed his gaze. “You wouldn't do that.”

“Sure I would. You have no idea how desperate I've become. It's you I want, but if what's holding you back is my virginity, then I'll get rid of it.”

He seemed livid. “Get rid of it? Kit, you are being unreasonable.”

She shook her head. “I know what I want, Griffin. I want you.”

He swore and then rushed to her. They came together in a tangle of arms and legs. As they tumbled onto the bed, his mouth moved seductively over hers in a slow, drugging kiss. She had made the right decision.

“I'm going to make you come until you can't breathe. You know I want you, and I am not a man who sits around and lets another have what's his.” He tugged her panties down her legs and lowered himself between her thighs. He took her into his mouth. His tongue stroked and probed. The sensations were shocking, and Kit couldn't do anything except feel.

His five-o'clock shadow brushed the inside of her thighs, the gruffness in contrast with the softness of his tongue.

He alternated using his mouth and his hands. She was on the edge of another release when he stopped. She let out a whimper.

She was naked and turned on, and she wanted him. “Please.”

“Say the words,” he said, lowering his mouth again, pressing a kiss to her thigh and then blowing a breath of air where she wanted his mouth and his hands.

“I want to come.”

He grinned and continued his caress of her body. Within minutes, he had her writhing against his mouth and at the point of rapture. Rhythmic cries shook her, and her body convulsed.

She rode the wave and felt every bone in her body relax even as her nerves tingled. “That wasn't what I had in mind.”

He lay next to her, and she set her head on his chest. His erection was pressing at the leg of his pants. She rolled toward it and kissed him through the material.

He twitched, but stopped her. She shook her head. “I want more.”

“Let's take our time, okay?”

“We're not leaving this room until we talk. I can sense you holding back.”

“I'm trying to protect you, and I don't see the need to rush.”

She ran her hand down his chest. “Don't protect me. Not here, in this space. Just kiss me and make love to me.”

Griffin wrapped his arms around her and did just as she asked. “I can do that in a hundred different ways. Let me show you.”

* * *

Griffin had outlived his usefulness on this mission. They had been at the base for a week. He made Kit feel safe, but with security tight, he didn't need to be here. What was he supposed to do? Escort Kit to and from their apartment? Wait while she worked in the lab?

He needed to have a difficult conversation with Connor. Once he got clearance to fly home, he would talk to Kit about it. She would understand.

She had agreed to accompany him to the gym after work and then on a run around the area. He was curious to see what he could find and perhaps figure out where they were.

He stretched his arms, trying not to stare at her in the mirror as she climbed onto the bicycle. Lifting weights felt good. He hadn't had much time in the gym recently, and he liked staying in shape.

Once he was involved in his workout, moving and lifting distracted him from the elephant in the room. He wanted to sleep with Kit. She wanted to sleep with him. Usually, that was the green light.

Their arrangement was more complicated. She was his client. He had touched her and fooled around with her—every night since they'd arrived—and he shouldn't have. He had let their relationship progress into a gray area.

If he told Connor that he'd had sexual contact with a client, he would be fired. At least, he assumed he would. His training with the West Company hadn't covered sleeping with clients, but he knew about conflicts of interest and losing objectivity when emotions came into play.

How could they not? He had slept in Kit's bed. He had made her come with his hands and his mouth. Possessiveness was inevitable. He did not like sharing a woman with another man, just as he did not sleep with more than one woman at a time. Looking for sex elsewhere was embarrassing, like admitting one woman wasn't enough.

A few guys entered the gym. Griffin wiped down his machine and moved to one closer to Kit. Though every man and woman on this base was screened and cleared, Griffin didn't trust easily.

The West Company didn't know how far Incognito had penetrated the Locker and if they'd compromised the people who had worked with it. They had gotten to Lawrence and they could get to others, including the people who worked at this base.

The men were tossing Kit looks. Long looks. Interested looks. Kit had indicated she wanted a relationship, and Griffin had been clear he couldn't provide it. When he wasn't on the island any longer, would one of these men take his place?

The idea did not sit well with him.

Griffin strode to Kit's bike. “Ready to run?” he asked.

“Outside?” she asked, not sounding enthusiastic about the idea.

“Yes.” He liked the fresh air, and working out in an air-conditioned gym wasn't the same as facing the elements.

“We can try it. But if my lungs burst, you'll have to carry me home.”

He was pleased by her choice of words. To anyone listening, they sounded like a couple. Let word get around base that she wasn't available. The effect would be temporary. He had no doubt that once he left the island, she'd have her pick of men. That thought bothered him deeply. He wanted her to be happy, and he didn't like knowing that her future happiness wouldn't be with him.

Chapter 11

T
hey left the gym, and Griffin slipped his arm across Kit's shoulders.

She looked up at the sky, a mix of gray and white clouds. “I don't run often. Maybe it will rain and save me the hassle.”

“Given the humidity and the weather we've had, storms roll through quickly. A light rain might feel good.”

She bent over and touched her toes, giving him a look at her shapely rear end. His body hardened, and hiding his attraction in gym shorts wasn't easy.

They followed the paved path, and he let her set the pace. The position of the sun in the sky, the heat and the stickiness of the air spoke to a tropical climate. He hadn't used his satellite phone to contact Connor yet, instead keeping his communication to approved means. He wasn't sure if the satellite phone's signal would be blacked out. “I want to get a message to Connor. I'd like to have an escape plan. If we need to get off this island, I want to know where I'm taking you for the fastest escape.”

Kit touched his hand. “A little slower,” she said between pants.

He'd thought she was leading. He slowed his pace and jogged beside her. In addition to his stride being twice hers, he was accustomed to running for lengthy periods of time.

“I can help you get a secure message out,” Kit said.

He'd bet she could. “Have you been sending secret messages already?”

“No,” she said. “I've been tempted. My family must be worried.”

“They've been contacted, and they know you're safe.”

“Safe? That's what this is?”

He tried not to take offense to her statement. “Do you feel secure with me?”

“I feel like I've committed a crime and am being punished. I'm not making any progress with securing the Locker or taking countermeasures against Incognito,” she said. “As long as I fail at those tasks and Incognito is still strong and pervasive around the world, I'll be a target and, therefore, stuck here.”

She was too hard on herself, and her rose-colored glasses were losing their tint. “It's day two. Don't get upset. If it was easy, they wouldn't need you.”

“The new team doesn't know what they're doing yet,” she said.

He had the sense he was more sounding board than advisor on this subject. “What makes you think that?”

“I was looking at some notes left on the message board by a teammate, and they were riddled with errors,” Kit said.

The Locker was a black box. It was impenetrable. Now that was working against them.

Kit stopped running and brought her hand to her head, the other to her hip. “What if I can't fix it? What if I don't want to fix it?”

“I am sure that you can.”

She shook her head. “It wasn't a one-person job.”

“I understand that. But the team is just catching up. There's a learning curve.”

She looked on the verge of crying. “I am good with computers. I understand them better than I understand humans. But I don't want to live here.”

“No one can force you.”

She said nothing to that. She started running again, and he stayed a stride behind.

They were a mile from the main facility, and Griffin heard a strange noise, like human grunting. He reached for Kit, drawing her close to him.

“What is that?” she whispered.

“I don't know.” Griffin didn't see anyone, but the unmistakable sound of grunting and flesh against flesh indicated either a fight or a sexual encounter. Griffin hoped not both. “Let me look around.”

If it was a fight, he could break it up. Keeping Kit in his peripheral vision, he moved through the trees.

Kit crept closer and ignored him when he waved her off.

Another few steps and someone came into view.

Not a fight. Not a sexual assault.

A couple was having sex. Loudly. A woman was perched on the bumper of a jeep, and a man was thrusting away. Both were moaning and gasping.

Kit grasped his arm. Her face was red, either from running or from embarrassment.

Without saying a word, they returned to the main path.

“That could be us,” she said.

Griffin kept his composure. “I don't have any interest in being an exhibitionist.”

“I didn't mean outside. I meant the sex part.”

Having sex with Kit played on his mind, but he didn't voice it as an option because it wasn't. Kit didn't have a filter on her thoughts, and she was the client. She couldn't be fired for inappropriate actions.

After what they had done, how was sleeping with her any different? At least he cared about her, and he could make the night about her, concentrating on making it incredible for her. A first time that wouldn't end in disappointment or disaster. If he didn't sleep with her, she might sleep with a military man posted here or a random guy from a bar. How much satisfaction would she derive from that?

One day, she would meet a man who could appreciate how remarkable she was and who would see her intelligence and beauty and caring and want to marry her. Griffin couldn't ask her to wait to sleep with a man who would marry her, but he could make her first time one she would not forget. She wouldn't easily fall into bed with another man. He'd set her expectations high and show her what she was worth.

If he told her he wanted to leave the island and she still wanted to sleep with him, perhaps they would, now or never.

* * *

Stupidity wasn't an emotion Kit was used to feeling. She grasped complex topics with ease, and she enjoyed her work.

Now something was missing. Maybe her thoughts were too scattered and her emotions shaking her up, or maybe her heart wasn't in it this time. Headway on re-securing the Locker was slow. She hated letting someone down. Her report on her work was firmly “no progress.”

The original Locker had been designed and engineered by three different people who were experts in their respective fields of computer science. How could she fill all three of those roles now? The new members of the team were smart, but without the history, they had a lot of new skills to master.

She and Griffin had arrived in their apartment after their second day of running outside after work, and Griffin had rushed to take a shower first, leaving her pacing in sweaty clothes. He was acting strangely and, typical of Griffin, he didn't discuss it. With the exception of the time he had told her that she was beautiful and that under other circumstances he'd want to be with her, he was frustratingly distant and confusing. He relayed nothing of his private thoughts.

He got out of the shower, and she slipped into the bathroom. The bathroom was serviceable but not luxurious. Kit was low-maintenance. Clean towels and basic soap were enough.

When she stepped out of the shower, she wrapped a towel around her hair and one around her body. Her clothes were in the bedroom. Quickly dressing, she hung her towels and joined Griffin in the main room.

She blinked at the transformation in the room. A brilliant array of orange, red, yellow, pink and blue flowers covered every space. Some were tucked in vases, some were scattered as individual flowers, and some petals were tossed across the floor.

Ivory candles lined the dresser.

A bottle of wine and two plates covered with silver domes were on the table.

Griffin was wearing a tuxedo, and her breath caught in her throat. She had never seen him looking this handsome.

The atmosphere left no question what this meant. A rectangular box tied with white ribbon sat on the coffee table.

He crossed the room to her, wrapped his arms around her and kissed her gently. “You smell good.”

“When did you have time to do this?” she asked.

“I've had time while you were working,” he said.

“I feel like I'm dressed wrong.” She was wearing a blue T-shirt and navy flannel shorts because she'd thought she would eat and then go to bed.

He gestured toward the red velvet box. “Open that.”

She took the gift box and untied the ribbon, lifted the lid and moved aside the tissue paper. Inside was a pair of pink pajamas made of the softest fabric. She took them from the box and held them up. The top was strappy, trimmed with lace, and the shorts were full, like a skirt.

“Give me one minute.” She returned to the bathroom to change. She could have redressed in front of him, but given the amount of effort he had put into arranging this night, she didn't want to rush. Getting naked in front of him would have made them both hurry to bed.

When had Griffin changed his mind about sleeping with her? How long had he been planning this?

She changed, brushed her hair again and then returned to Griffin.

He was standing at attention, waiting for her.

“You're too dressed up.” She grabbed the sides of his coat and pulled them over his shoulders. She set the black jacket over the back of the couch.

“I thought you wanted me dressed up.”

“I like you in this. But I also like you with fewer clothes.”

“Before this goes any further, I need to tell you something.”

She waited. He had lit her on fire, and now he wanted to talk? “Tell me.”

“I may be transferred to another mission.”

The words hit her heavy on the shoulders. “You're leaving me.”

“Nothing has been decided, but I need you to know that before this goes any further.”

Their relationship had an expiration date. She could live with that. What she couldn't live with was the regret she'd harbor if he left and she had never been with him. She would wonder and wish for the rest of her life. “I understand, and it's okay. Come what may, I want this to happen tonight.”

She untied his tie and unbuttoned his shirt. “Is this okay?”

“It's your night. Anything you want to do is okay with me,” he said.

Anything she wanted. Where to start? She had fantasies she had never explored, role playing and old-fashioned games, but tonight she would be herself, and Griffin would be himself.

“Would you like music?” he asked.

She nodded, and he withdrew a remote from his pocket. He pressed a button, and the room was filled with soft, melodic music. He closed her in his arms again and spun her once, bringing her body flush to his. Her hips brushed his pelvis, and excitement shot through her.

It wasn't the first time they had danced together, but this time, they were alone. They didn't have the heavy pulsing of music and the grinding of bodies or the darkness of a warehouse to distract them from each other.

“I love that my body turns you on,” he said.

Was it that obvious? She loved touching the hard planes of his shoulders, chest and stomach. “I could say the same.”

He kissed her again, and his mouth conquered hers. His tongue demanded a response. The more he kissed her, the more she wanted him. She guided him toward the bed and pushed gently on his shoulders. When he was flat on his back, his feet on the floor, she climbed on top of him.

“Don't you want to eat first?” he asked.

She shook her head. “It will wait.”

“You didn't see what I ordered for us.”

“Nothing out there interests me more than what's right here.”

She pressed her mouth to his and sank against him. The kiss spun into passion, and she was overcome with emotion. He tipped his hips against hers, and she responded in kind.

The soft fabric of the pajamas he'd bought her rubbed against her skin, making her feel delicate and exquisite. His hands went to her thighs and he rubbed the backs of them, massaging the muscles.

She unfastened his pants and drew them down his legs. Button by button, she removed his shirt. He sat and took the hem of her camisole by the narrow strip of lace and pulled it over her head. He dropped it and then closed his mouth over her exposed nipple.

His hand caressed her and his mouth moved between her breasts until she was hot and achy. Shockingly sensuous feelings tumbled over her. Her head hit the pillow and she melted into the mattress. He removed the rest of her clothes.

The haze of sharp lust took over. She wanted this to last forever, yet she wanted him to hurry and give her the fulfillment she craved. Skin to skin, sensations pulsed between them.

He moved on top of her, donned a condom and then let his weight settle over her. He rocked his hips, the head of his arousal pressing at the V of her legs, but not entering her.

He reached between them and used his hands to heighten her excitement. She was ready, and she lifted her hips, encouraging him to push inside her. He pulled back. “Easy. We have all night.”

All night? Scorching desire pricked at her, and the more he touched her, the more she wanted him. She grabbed his hips and parted her thighs. “Take me or I will take you.”

His eyes burned with heat and he pushed inside her, just a little. He stretched her and he worked his hips, moving inside her, deeper and deeper. “This might hurt.”

She was ready. Hot and wet, she set her hands on his hips and drew him closer.

He surged forward, and a sharp pain shot between her legs. He stilled and she shifted, searching for a more comfortable position. Tears sprang to her eyes, and she blinked them back. One escaped and Griffin kissed it, then wiped it away with his thumb.

“Are you okay?” he asked, his voice tender and warm.

She nodded.

He kissed her, deep kisses, hard kisses, soft kisses, and caressed her. The pain between her legs subsided, and other needs grew more pressing. “Please, Griffin, make love with me.”

She stayed with him in the moment, watching him move, trying to remember every detail of this night so she could recall it later.

He moved languidly inside her, his strokes deep and slow. Lust wound tight inside her.

He touched her cheek, the most delicate of touches, running his hand down to her chin. “You are so beautiful.”

Holding her close, he set a hard and steady rhythm, plunging deep, making her crazier by the second. Pressure built inside her.