Deliverance (27 page)

I’m in a dark empty room by myself. The only furniture is a chair in one corner. The windows are blacked out and though I know there are other people in the apartment, I feel completely isolated from them. I’m also hungry. Though the sun is about to set and I should be able to break my fast with vegetarian food, Maman has advised against it. She says we should take whatever precautions we can.

It’s almost time, so I pour rose water in all four corners of the room, and make sure to freshen the incense being burned. I draw a large circle in the middle of the floor like we’ve practiced and write several verses from the Koran along with some other runes whose meanings are unclear to me. All I know is that all this stuff is supposed to protect me, but it all seems a bit much to me, like those cheesy Hollywood witchcraft movies. Still, there’s a certain aesthetic pleasure to it all. The curves on curves are reminiscent of the great arches and domes of Eastern architecture. I’m pleased with my handiwork. I step into the circle and close it, then sprinkle iron shavings along the perimeter.

My heartbeat resonates in my ears. Otherwise, the room is silent. I know Pareen’s hidden name from my old memories so I don’t need to wrestle with Jinn to get to her. It should be relatively straightforward. Relatively safe.

Though a part of me has been involved in the supernatural for millennia, this still seems like diving into a completely different world. And for the human part of me, it’s unreal. I know that once I do this, the world will forever change for me. I will be open to other experiences and will be forever marked by the other-world. Not that they hadn’t already marked me.

I tuck in the loose edges of my scarf and run my fingers along them to make sure all my hair is covered. Some Jinn can be tempted and distracted by a woman’s hair, and I don’t want to leave anything to chance.

Finally, all my preparations are done. Night has fallen and the only thing left for me to do is to summon Pareen. The ornate iron dagger weighs my hand down and I hope that it’s used for symbolism and not to defend myself. I focus on the chair and begin a cycle of repetition. The words seem ridiculous on my tongue but I don’t break the cycle. I repeat them over and over. The air thickens and I sway slightly. I’m dizzy from the heavy incense and lack of food. The runes and diagrams at my feet seem to sway too. Though the room is completely black and I should not be able to see them, they emit a slight light blue glow. Like essence.

Suddenly I feel them. Several presences are vying for my attention. They seem angry or agitated but they don’t breach my circle of protection. Likewise, I don’t breach my chanting. This is a test of my strength and determination. There is no turning back now. I have opened myself to the other-world. I need to see it through.

My head hurts. A throbbing pain accentuates every syllable I utter. I clutch the dagger tighter and the creatures move. I can’t tell if they move towards me or away and I don’t even know what they look like. I simply feel their energy. And it’s anything but calm.

I breathe deeply and continue reciting the words Maman told me. They are simple. I don’t have to focus too much on them, so I focus on the chair instead. Finally, once I’m done, I call her. I use her secret name.

I close my eyes and when I open them, Pareen is sitting regally on the chair. She has one leg crossed over her knee and her hands on her lap. She looks like a queen. A very angry queen.

When Nakissa finally came out of seclusion, she looked half Jinn herself. Somehow in the few hours since I’d last seen her, she’d lost weight. Her eyes had dark rings under them and her hair seemed dull and brittle.

She didn’t say a word, stepped right up to me, and placed her hand on my chest. Her mother came up behind her and placed her hands on Nakissa’s shoulder while the latter healed me. The essence was unlike anything I’d ever felt. It was thick, like blood. But it had a strong, bright quality, too. Another feeling possessed me as her hand touched my body. A feeling that intensified the stronger I became. This feeling was much closer related to being a man than being a supernatural creature.

Once fully healed, I didn’t know how I would resist her. How I would stop myself from touching my lips on hers, and on her neck and on… It was very warm in this apartment.

I pushed myself away from her hand.

“Thank you,” I said.

She nodded and curled herself up in a ball on the other end of the couch. As if she was trying to keep herself as far away from me as possible. Of course she would, her mother was there. I couldn’t take it personally.

I wished she would speak. I wanted to know what had happened in there. I needed to know more. If there was anything we could use to save Leyli and Aude. To save the world. Was it too much for me to expect? I was more than human, but my whole life had been spent protecting one witch, and even that seemed impossible to do at times.

Her mother excused herself and came back with warm milk and tea. She also set up a tray with some sesame seed and honey sweets, some mixed nuts, and a bowl of fruit and small cucumbers. When an older man entered the room followed by Nakissa’s little brother, Nakissa’s mother tried to shoo them away, but Ebi was happy to see me. I stood up and introduced myself to Nakissa’s step-father.

The man, Bijan, eyed me warily. He let out a heavy sigh and was about to drop onto the seat opposite the couch when he noticed Nakissa. Worry etched deep lines into his gentle face and he stepped towards her.

“What’s happened?” he demanded.

“She rescued this boy from a bad sort.” I was impressed by how truthful the woman was to her husband, yet without opening him to things he was obviously not ready to believe. “He’s a visitor here and we should extend him our hospitality. Could you and Ebi go to his hotel and pick up his things?”

Bijan furrowed his eyebrows with a quizzical look in his eyes but he did not challenge his wife. I gave him my key and the boys excused themselves, Ebi rather reluctantly. I assured him we would get time to hangout later.

“Maman, I need to talk to Garnier.”

“I wish you would talk to me.”

“Maman, please?”

“I’ll start making dinner. Might as well show off how good my ghormeh sabzi is.” She gave her daughter a long look before leaving the room.

Nakissa reached for her warm milk and held it tightly between her hands. She looked cold. I took my jacket off and placed it on her shoulder.

“Pareen wasn’t happy,” she said.

I sat next to her, but didn’t dare touch her. I was an eight hundred year old supernatural creature, yet I was scared of the wrath of an Iranian mother.

“She wasn’t happy to help me?”

“She wasn’t happy to be summoned. Apparently this sort of a ritual leaves us both vulnerable. I had to compel her to help me. But when I finally did…” Nakissa looked at her hands and then to her feet. She settled herself deeper into the couch and wrapped her arms tighter against her knees. She looked at me. “She’s giving more than I can take.”

“What do you mean?”

“She will make me into a Gargoyle again.”

A lightness overcame my heart. Nakissa would be one of us again. Female Gargoyles were rare simply because they were made to be protector mostly during a time when women were not seen as having any values in that aspect. But this was about more than just being about a girl of my own kind. It was about this girl. My girl. She would stay mine. Her eyes were serious, her mouth set in a line. I knew there was more to it. Something I was ignoring. I couldn’t help it; I reached for her hands and smiled.

She didn’t let me keep them for long before she withdrew them and looked me in the eye. Hers were red, and a pair of lonely tears shimmered on her cheek. “I can’t accept her sacrifice.”

My chest became heavier. Because to make a Gargoyle, a sacrifice had to be made. “You forced Pareen to offer to sacrifice herself?”

“No… Yes! I don’t know. I just compelled her to help me. She said the only way she could help me was to offer herself as a sacrifice. There has to be another way. There has to be.”

“Let’s think about it. If you were stronger could you take Ramtin on?”

“No, he’s always been just a little stronger than me. He has more resources. He has followers and witches, and Jinn.”

“But you have some power now, and Pareen is very powerful. Isn’t there a possibility it would make you equal?”

“Maybe but –“

“And my family is on the way to help save Aude. We now know Leyli’s family has mystical powers. There’s Deleer…”

“Deleer?”

“A Gargoyle dog.”

“Oh. Of course.”

She placed her head between her hands. “I just don’t know. I don’t know if this is something she even offered me of her own will. Do I have the right to take her life?”

“We don’t have to make a decision right away. What you need right now is sleep. We can decide in the morning.”

Was Nakissa strong enough that she could have summoned a Queen Jinn and compelled her to offer herself as a sacrifice? Pareen had always been on our side. Was it so unbelievable that she would have offered herself? But even if she hadn’t, her death could mean life for countless people. Surely it would be worth it. I could sit comfortably with the idea. I knew what it was like to have someone lose their life to make you. Nakissa knew it too. We’d both been through it already. But Pareen had been alive for millennia; surely her time had to end eventually. Or would we be ridding the world of a timeless treasure?

We sat in silence until Bijan and Ebi came back and Nakissa’s mother called us for dinner.

Her ghormeh sabzi was in fact delicious. But the beef chunks and red kidney beans in a green herb sauce didn’t hold the answers to our dilemmas no matter how often we pushed them around our plates. Bijan asked questions about life in Montreal and how I liked Iran so far. I tried to keep up with the casual conversation but I couldn’t focus. I could only think of Pareen, and how her death could mean the answer to most of our problems. I had never wished for someone to be dead like I did then. And the thought turned my stomach.

Once I managed to tune back into the conversation it came to my attention that it was the beginning of the Persian New Year and the family were trying to coordinate all of the visiting they would be doing within the next week. I was surprised they were including me in their plans.

“Should we say he is simply a visitor or that he is Nakissa’s fiancé?” Her mother asked her husband.

Nakissa choked on her food. The way we felt about each other hadn’t gone unnoticed but her parents had still accepted me into their home. I smiled and Nakissa furrowed her brows at me.

I cleared my throat. “You have been very generous but my family is coming in to Tehran tomorrow. It would be best if I stayed with them.”

“Of course, of course. But are you sure you will be safe?”

“As safe as I can be, khanom.”

“You and your family will visit us to celebrate the holiday?”

I smiled at her. Hopefully if we were still around for Nowruz, it would mean we’d been successful.

We finished dinner talking in a combination of Persian and English and I suddenly missed my own family very much. I missed the interaction I saw between Nakissa and her family. No matter how hospitable they were with me, we just didn’t have that history that kept them talking and laughing. Color returned to Nakissa’s cheeks. She looked more alive. When she had given up immortality to save her life, she had found so much more.

Was taking her humanity from her again the right answer? She could keep this relationship with her parents for a while and her mother was open to the supernatural; she would accept it even once it became obvious Nakissa wouldn’t age. I wasn’t asking her to give up anything. Just to be with me forever. My eyes met hers. Her cheeks colored even more and she looked to her plate. My heart lightened. I loved this girl in a way I could never have loved her previous incarnation.

I sighed happily and Nakissa’s mother beamed a smile at me obviously thinking my satisfaction was derived from her food. And it could well have been. I was satisfied in many ways. I would convince Nakissa that Pareen’s sacrifice was the right thing to do. We would defeat Ramtin. We would live together. Forever.