Deception and Desire (65 page)

Ros had had to pretend surprise, of course. She could not let Dinah know she already knew she had a son, much less that she had met him. But Dinah's delight was disconcerting. Van had said he was keeping the reappearance of the boy a secret from her because he did not want to upset her – clearly the letter she had received from him now had had quite the opposite effect.

‘I can't believe it!' Dinah whispered to Ros, her face glowing, her hands pressed to her cheeks like a child. ‘I never thought I'd see him again, and now … Oh, if you knew how I've longed for him, Ros, how I have blamed myself for giving him up to strangers, wanted … oh, just to get a glimpse of him so that I'd know what he looked like! And now, right out of the blue, he's written to me, asking if we can meet! Isn't fate strange? They say God never shuts a door but he opens a window. I've lost Van but now suddenly my son is back. It's unbelievable really!'

Not as unbelievable as all that, Ros thought cynically. Van had sent him away before and now he had read of the great man's death he was back, trying to set up a meeting all over again. But in view of Dinah's obvious happiness it could be no bad thing.

When Steve finally arrived, however, and Ros was introduced to him, she was both startled and puzzled. For though she had seen Dinah's son only briefly at Van's apartment the young man standing before her, holding proprietorially on to Dinah's arm, was not at all the way she remembered him.

At first Ros had told herself that memory must be playing her false. Like her, that night he had been dressed for the cold winter weather – she remembered a bulky parka distorting his shape – and she told herself that in the intervening years she must have superimposed the face of someone else she had met briefly, either in the course of her work or socially. She could not, after all, picture with any clarity what the man she had met at Van's apartment had looked like, only that she did not think he had looked like this. And it wasn't only the face that was wrong, it was the voice too. She had only heard him speak one sentence but she could have sworn he had an ordinary English voice, whilst this Steve spoke with a slight but unmistakable transatlantic accent. He had explained to Dinah that the family who had adopted him had emigrated to Canada and he had been brought up there, and she had accepted it without question. But it jarred on Ros all the same.

Carefully employing all her tact Ros had begun questioning him. The answers he gave were slick and plausible but instead of being satisfied Ros's sense of unease grew.

One day she tentatively mentioned Van's apartment.

‘Lucky for him it was ground floor,' she said, almost holding her breath. ‘If he'd had stairs to run up and down maybe his heart would have given out much earlier.'

And Steve, without so much as blinking an eyelid, replied: ‘That's true. Though if he'd had prior warning he might be alive today.'

Ros knew then without any doubt that she was right – he had never been to Van's apartment. So – one of the young men who claimed to be Dinah's son was an imposter. But which one? With all her heart Ros hoped it was Steve who was genuine. To discover she had been duped would break Dinah's heart.

Ros puzzled and worried the facts around. With a mother like Dinah and an empire like Vandina to aspire to it was not difficult to see why an unscrupulous fortune-hunter should want to lay down a claim. But it wasn't that simple. The fact that Dinah had had an illegitimate son had been a closely guarded secret, and details of parentage would only be released to a genuine applicant after a great deal of official counselling. It did not make sense, any of it.

When Dinah began installing Steve as heir apparent Ros grew more and more worried. She was convinced something was very wrong but her loyalty to Dinah imposed an insurmountable dilemma. If Steve was an imposter then he could not be allowed to go on taking advantage of Dinah. But such a revelation would come as a terrible shock to her and would break her heart. For weeks Ros agonised, even allowing Steve to wine and dine her once or twice in an effort to get close to him and learn the truth. But she was unable to penetrate the persona he had created for himself and eventually she reached a decision. Somehow she had to find out exactly what was going on. Then, and only then, could she decide what to do about it.

Now, twisting the vodka glass between her fingers as she talked with Maggie and Mike, she faced again the dilemma that had tormented her. To explain why it was she had been suspicious of Steve meant admitting to her affair with Van. Ros, secretive and passionate by nature, was still unwilling to tell the whole truth. Yet with the knowledge now in her possession she knew that the time had come when she had to be honest about at least some of it.

‘I didn't tell you because I wasn't sure,' she said. ‘ Can't you see, Mike, what a devastating accusation I would have been making?'

‘Couldn't you have trusted me?' Mike asked.

‘I should have done, I suppose. But I thought it was better to keep my suspicions to myself until I was sure.'

‘I still don't see why you went off without a word. Didn't you realise how worried we would be?'

Ros sighed, shaking her head.

‘Mike, please try to see it from my point of view. I thought that while you were away at school camp would be the ideal opportunity for me to follow up my investigations without you asking awkward questions. I never intended to be gone so long.'

‘You couldn't have been so naive as to think you could go to Argentina and back in the same way you could go to Bournemouth.'

‘I told you, I didn't set out to go to Argentina. I only intended to go to London. I had been in touch with Excel Oil – the company who employed Steve in the North Sea. They gave me the address of a man who worked closely with him on the rigs – a Londoner named Des Taylor. I decided to go and see him.'

Maggie and Mike exchanged glances. Des Taylor – the man who had rung the cottage asking for Ros.

‘So – what happened?'

‘This Des Taylor was away – my fault, I suppose, for not checking first to make sure I would find him at home. But I was able to talk to his parents. They showed me a photograph – their son with the two other divers who made up his team. One was Steve. The other was the young man I saw at Van's apartment.'

‘What do you mean … you saw?' Mike queried.

Ros coloured faintly. ‘I was at Van's apartment one night – working – when this young man was there. Van sent him away saying that Dinah would not want to be reminded of her past. Anyway, I immediately recognised the man in the photograph as being that same man. Des Taylor's parents said they knew him as ‘‘Mac” and that he had gone to Argentina to dive for one of the multinationals there. They also said that soon afterwards word had got back to the Excel rig that he had been killed in a diving accident. That, I suppose, was when Steve decided to take his identity.'

‘The bastard!' Mike exploded.

Tears welled unexpectedly in Maggie's eyes. The events of the day had left her raw and emotional and she was overwhelmed by a rush of pity for the woman who had been exploited so ruthlessly.

‘Poor, poor Dinah.'

‘Yes, poor Dinah,' Ros echoed grimly. ‘She's had a pretty rotten deal from life, hasn't she? A great many people envy her, I expect, but they haven't a clue about all the traumas and heartaches she has had to endure.'

‘I still don't really understand why you went straight off to Argentina without letting us know about it,' Mike said. His voice was hard, the outward manifestation of the strains of the day and the jumble of emotions he was now experiencing.

‘You know me, Mike,' Ros said tightly. ‘I believe in striking whilst the iron is hot, and I honestly never thought for a moment it would cause all this upset. Why should you think I was
dead
, for heaven's sake?'

‘All kinds of reasons!' Maggie snapped. The relief was now beginning to turn to anger that Ros should have put them through all this anxiety and be seemingly totally unrepentant. ‘Your bank statement, for one thing. You hadn't drawn any money. How did you go to Argentina without drawing any money?'

‘I used my new American Express. Why the hell shouldn't I?'

‘And your car – the driving seat was in the wrong position for you … too far back. Did someone take you to the station?' Mike asked.

‘Of course not! The seat was moved back, you say? I don't understand why that should be … Oh yes, wait a minute. I dropped an earring. I suppose I moved the seat back to pick it up. But I don't see what you were doing poking about in my bank statements and my car anyway.'

‘If you'd had a little more forethought, Ros, we wouldn't have had to.'

Ros, on the point of snapping back, changed her mind.

‘I'm going to see Dinah.'

‘Tonight?'

‘Tonight. There's something I have to tell her which might help to soften the blow. I was going to leave it on the back burner until tomorrow, but under the circumstances I think she should know at once. Can I take your car, Mike?'

‘Now – tonight? Ros, I …'

‘If you won't let me, I suppose I'll have to call a taxi.'

‘Why do you have to go and see her tonight? I shouldn't think she'd be in a fit state to see anyone. After unleashing all this, what can you tell her that will be any help at all?'

‘Possibly the one thing that will give her a glimmer of hope.'

‘Which is?'

But Ros shook her head. ‘To be honest, I think I owe it to Dinah to tell her first before I discuss it with anyone else. But please believe me when I say it is very significant.'

Maggie and Mike said nothing. But Mike fished in the pocket of his jacket, took out his keys and handed them to Ros.

‘I hope Ros won't be too long,' Mike said when she had gone. ‘You look all in, Maggie, and I want to get you home and tucked up in bed with a warm drink.'

Maggie looked startled.

‘But Mike, surely you realise – I'll have to stay here now.'

‘What do you mean – you'll have to stay here?'

‘Just that.' She felt drained, as if all the events of the day – and the past week – had suddenly come together to swamp her. There was enormous relief that Ros was alive and well, a little anger that she should have put them through so much, and also an aching regret she had not yet stopped to analyse but which she knew had to do with her and Mike. ‘I must stay here with Ros. I can hardly come to your flat now, can I?'

‘Why not?'

‘Oh Mike, everything has changed, hasn't it? Ros is back and I'm glad … of course I am! Only …' She gestured helplessly.

He reached for her and she withdrew her hand quickly and turned away so that he would not see the tears brimming in her eyes.

‘Don't, please, make it more difficult. It's over. You must see that.'

‘I see that it makes it more complicated. But it doesn't necessarily mean we can't …'

‘I couldn't do that to Ros. I couldn't let her think that I … that when we thought something had happened to her you and I were … I just couldn't!'

She was filled now with shame and confusion. The last days had been a nightmare but also a madness. It was as if the world had tilted, turned upside down, and now with Ros walking through the door it had shifted again so that everything was almost, though not quite, as it had been, like a constantly changing lava lamp.

‘Ros didn't seem very concerned about anyone else's feelings when she went off without a word,' Mike said. His voice was hard.

‘But she explained about that.' Maggie found herself wanting to stand up for her sister. ‘ Her main concern was trying to save Dinah from more hurt than was absolutely unavoidable. Oh, don't look so disapproving, Mike. I can see why she did it if you can't.'

‘Then all things considered you are more understanding than I am.'

‘You mustn't blame her so. Ros is … Ros. You know that. And she loves you, Mike. She'd be devastated if she thought you and I … well, did what we did. She's had a pretty tough time in the past. I don't want to upset things for her again.'

‘She's made a pretty good job of upsetting them for herself.'

‘Anyway,' Maggie said. ‘It's not just Ros who has to be considered. There's Ari too.'

‘I didn't think he made you very happy.'

‘He's my husband, Mike. I owe him something, for goodness' sake. I've already betrayed him but I can't just discount him as if he didn't exist because it suits me. These last few days have been … well, unreal. But somehow now we know Ros is all right it's as if I can see things clearly again. And what I see is that you must forgive her for going away without telling you and I must go home to Corfu and try to make up to Ari for what I've done.'

Her voice choked off in a sob. Mike made a half-move towards her, then checked.

‘All right, Maggie, have it your way. To be honest I think you're overemotional and getting everything out of perspective.'

‘No, Mike, I'm seeing it straight. For the first time for days I'm seeing things the way they are.'

‘All right,' he said wearily. ‘ I won't argue with you. I've had enough for one day.'

‘
You
have had enough!'

‘Yes, me. I have feelings too. And I've had quite enough of women and their fickle-mindedness to last me for some time. I'm going home.'

‘You can't … Ros has your car.'

‘Dammit, so she does. Well, Maggie, if you insist on staying here I suggest you get yourself to bed and I'll wait here for Ros to come back. Alone.'

His voice was cold and final. Maggie felt the tears springing to her eyes. It would be easy, so easy, to put her arms around him and tell him what was in her heart – that she loved him desperately and wanted nothing more than to be with him tonight and for the rest of her life. But it would achieve nothing. She loved him – but she had met him too late. To be with him now she would have to hurt two people she cared for, and she knew instinctively that happiness taken at the expense of others would be happiness paid for too dear. Better to leave things as they were, leave him while he was angry and while she still had the strength to do so.