Death of Cupids (The Blood of Cupids MC) (12 page)

Grace

Over the course of the next few weeks, as my belly grew
bigger, I ran into Mark in the strangest places.  I was tired of being
cooped up in my apartment, so I picked a new place to work each day.

He was there. He was at my favorite coffee shop.  He
was at the only deli I step foot in.  He was at the pastry shop where they
make forty flavors of macaroons.

“Okay, I actually think you’re stalking me now.”  I
called to him over my computer.

I was sitting on a bench in the quietest corner of this small
patch of grass by my apartment when I spotted him walking his dog.

“I’m actually getting the feeling I’m stalking you as well.”

We both laughed, and his little cocker spaniel jogged over
to me, excited to say ‘hi’.  I had met her on numerous occasions now, and
we were becoming fast friends.

“Hello Gnocchi.”  I rubbed her ears as she pawed at my
lap.

“Okay, girl, get down.”  He gently pushed Gnocchi so
that all four of her paws were touching the ground.  “Mind if I sit?”

“Of course not.”  I scooted over slightly, giving him
room to join me.

“Anything good?”  He motioned to my computer.

“Just inventory of all the different shades of pink
headbands.”

“Pink?  How many possible shades of--”

“Twelve.”  I interrupted him.  “There are twelve
different shades and we’re about to introduce two more.”

“No.”

“Yes!”

We laughed, and then allowed the silence to take over. 
Then we laughed at the silence.  I turned to him to break the awkwardness,
but before I could say anything, his hand was on mine.

“Grace, can I… can I take you out sometime?”

It was the farthest thing from my expectation.  “Mark,
I’m married.”

“No, no, I know that.  Wow, I worded that wrong. 
I just mean as friends.”

I mean, we had run into each other so many times that we
were becoming friends.  And I did enjoy his company.  What harm could
come from an innocent night out among friends.

“Your husband can come too.”  He quickly added.

I tried to not let my face change to show the jab of pain I
felt.  I didn’t want him to know what I had been going through, that I had
been alone for the past four months, that I was becoming more and more sure
every day that my husband was dead.

“No, that’s fine.  He works a lot.”  I lied. 
“But yes, I’d love to… hang out some time… you know, for real… not just
randomly running into each other.”

“Great.  Then it’s a date.”  He stood. 
“Well, a friend date.”

“A friend date.”  I smiled.  “So when is this
friend date?”

“Now?”

“Like right now?”

“Why not?  We both seem to be free, you already know
how many shades of pink headbands exist, and I’m hungry.”

He had a point.  I was hungry too.  Why not? 
I was tired of spending my days alone.  A little company could be exactly
what I needed.

He took me to a small bistro just a few blocks away. 
We chose a table outside, but in the shade.  The sun was becoming a little
unbearable in my pregnant state.

“So tell me something interesting about Grace.”

Ha.  What to say and what to hide?  What was
interesting, but didn’t divulge too much of my past?  What… what… 
Why couldn’t I think of anything to say?  Was there really nothing about
me other than the things I wished to hide?

I felt my face flush.  I felt my hands clam up.  I
needed to say something.  I needed to answer his question in a way that
didn’t cause more unanswered questions.  I needed something…

“My father was the president of a motorcycle club.”

No, Grace.  That was not the answer you were looking
for.

Ryan

“What are we doing here, Sean?”  We were standing in
front of Anne Marie Carter’s house.  Sean had taken me to see my mother.

“I told you I had a surprise for you.”

“You have everything you want.  There’s no need to drag
her into this again.”

He started laughing boisterously as he slung his arm around
my shoulder.  “Oh Ryan, that’s the surprise.  I did no such
dragging.”

What was he talking about?  Why were we walking up to
the house of the woman who had abandoned me so long ago?  What part did
she play in all of this?

“Ryan, I present to you, my house, the house I have lived in
for the past twenty-seven fucking years.”

“But…” This was the address Grace had sent me the day she was
taken.  I was sure of that.  So it wasn’t my mother’s house?  It
was Sean’s?

Sean pulled out his key from his back pocket, and pushed the
door open.  “Honey, I’m home.”  He jokingly called.

Then, from the kitchen, came the same chocolate haired woman
who stood in my doorway claiming that her children had been taken.  She
was wiping her hands with a towel, but stopped suddenly when she saw me.

Still looking at me, she shot her stern voice to Sean. 
“I thought we had decided we’d discuss it before bringing him here, Sean.”

“He was ready.  You should have seen him today.” 
He patted me on the back like a proud father.

I stood there, motionless, trying to take it all in. 
Could it be?  Could it really be?  Sean and my mother?  All this
time?

“I think I’m going to be sick.”

“Oh come now.  I’ve been fucking your mother
forever.  Hell, you could even be my son.”

“Sean, stop.  You’re scaring him.”

“It’s possible.”

“No, it’s not possible.  Now stop it.”

“You never let me have any fun.”

He chuckled as he bent down to kiss her.  I felt my
stomach churn.  He pinched her ass, causing her to yelp and slap him with
the towel.  Were they happy?  Did they actually make each other
happy?  Sean had a life outside of work?

“Okay, now you get in there and defrost the steaks. 
This is cause for a celebration.”  She looked at me and softly
smiled.  “My son has finally come home.”

Sean winked at me before escaping to the kitchen.  I
stood in the same spot, my feet refusing to move.  Anne Marie placed her
small hand on my arm.  “Ryan, I know this is a lot to take in.  Walk
with me?”

“Sure.”  My voice cracked.

I followed her outside and a few yards down the street
before finally getting up the nerve to speak.  “So Sean isn’t…”

“No.  James Cassidy was your father.  I am sure of
that.  Things with Sean and I didn’t start until after… until after
Grace’s mother died.”

“But you and Sean?  You and Sean?”

“I know it seems extreme, especially for you, but he’s a
good man.”

“No.  No.  No.”  I repeated.  “He’s
not.”

“You know one side of him.”

“Yeah, the one that kills people.”  I said a little too
loud.

“Okay, I’ll give you that.  But there’s always two
sides to every story.”

As we circled the block, she reminded me of the night Grace had
snuck into the
Cupid’s
boxing match.  When Sean saw her, he was
brought back to the night twenty years earlier when he had killed her
mother.  He had done that for Anne Marie, to prove his love for her. 
He knew she wanted to stay married his brother, even if he didn’t understand
it.  But Emily Brennan was trying to break up a marriage, and it was about
to crush the only woman he every loved.  How could he let that
happen?  He proved he would kill to make her happy.

“But I couldn’t stay after that.  I couldn’t stay with
your father.  I was afraid he would find out.  I was afraid Sean
would be put away and I’d be locked up as an accomplice.  And after what
he did
for me
?  I couldn’t let him burn for that.”

“So you ran away with Sean?”

“I didn’t run far.”  She hinted at a smile.

“But you left me.  You abandoned a six year old.”

“I know, Ryan.  It’s the one thing I regret most in
life.  But I couldn’t have taken you.  Your father would have found
out.  You understand that, right?”

I did, to an extent, but I still felt betrayed.

“But Sean came home every day and told me about you. 
He would sneak me pictures, and your artwork, and even some of the stories you
wrote when you got older.  Through him, I watched you grow up.”

When Sean had come home and told my mother about Grace, that
he was almost certain we were having some sort of affair, she lost all hope of
seeing me again.  She thought she had lost me to a Brennan, just as she
had lost her husband to one so long ago.  Sean stepped up, yet again, ready
to prove his worth and get me back.

“You know he tortured me, right?”  Her whole romantic
tale still bore a handful of holes.

“He did tell me that.  And I was not happy, Ryan. 
Please believe that.  But look, everything he did, although maybe not the
easiest path, got you back here to me.  He did it.  He brought me my
son back.  We can be a family again.”
“I had a family.”  I stopped her, squeezing my fingers into her
shoulders.  “I had a wife, and a baby coming.”

“I didn’t know any of that when we arranged for her
kidnapping.”

“Oh my fucking God.  Really?  You’re just going to
say it that nonchalantly?  You kidnapped my wife.  You drugged
her.  She’s fucking pregnant.”

“Shh, Ryan,” she put her fingers to my mouth, “I know this
is a lot to take in.”

“You think?”

I turned and walked ahead of her.  I didn’t want to
hear any more.  I came back upon the house and plopped down on the porch
step.  After a minute or two, she stepped up and sat beside me.

“Have you spoken to Grace since that night?”

“No.  I’m a prisoner here.  Sean swore to me he’d
leave her alone if I left her.”

“And did you tell her that?”

“Yes…. Well, no.  I tried, but I don’t think she heard
me.  I think she had passed out from the cold at about that point.”

“And she hasn’t tried to find you?”

“I’m sure she has.”

“Ryan,” she placed her hand on my thigh.  “It’s been
four months.  You’ve been living at your father’s house.  She hasn’t
been looking for you, or else she would’ve found you.”

Why hadn’t Grace found me?  I knew I couldn’t go
searching for her, but why hadn’t she come searching for me?  Sure, my
phone had been cut off, but she hadn’t been to the house, she hadn’t been to
see Rocky, and she hadn’t been to the clubhouse.  Those were all carefully
monitored places; I would’ve known.  And yet, nothing.  Did she
really never care enough about me to look?  Maybe my mother was right when
she warned me on the trip east.  Maybe Grace and I only fell in love
because of circumstance.  When push came to shove, we gave up.  She
gave up.

“She hasn’t found me.”

“She hasn’t.”

“But she loves me; I’m sure of it.”

“Love can only take you so far, son.  Everyone has
breaking points.  We found hers.”

I stood, towering over her.  “You… you did this. 
We were fine.  We were happy.  Then you came in and ruined us.”

“Ryan,” she stood to meet me, “I simply tested her.  I
wanted to make sure she was worthy of you.  And look what happened.”

“She almost died.” My voice boomed.

“She gave up on you.”

The wind caught up with our labored breathing.  I was
angry, but maybe only more so because I was seeing things her way.  I
became angry with Grace.  I had done what I had to do to protect her, but
she didn’t even put up a fight.  It was she who had abandoned me this
time.  And it was my mother who had saved me.  Go figure.

“Hey, let’s go inside.  I want you to meet your brother
and sister.”

She opened the door, and I followed her inside.  She
took my hand and led me into the kitchen.  There, before me, were two
smaller versions of myself: Sarah and Joseph, my siblings.  In that
kitchen were a mother, a father, and their children.  It was a family, and
they wanted me.

It almost felt like home.

Almost.

I still wanted Grace.