Damaged and the Bulldog (11 page)

My mind swam with thoughts of Winnie. During lunch, I
sat in a corner at a small deli and listened to Journey with my earplugs. All
the while, I imagined Winnie sitting next to me.

I missed her like crazy. Too much really. How I could
function long term feeling so overwhelmed by such need? Would the need lessen
once we’d spent enough time together? Or would I learn to live with the all
encompassing desire for Winnie?

Walking back to Cooper’s office, I passed one of the
two antique shops in Ellsberg. Evoking Memories was also the only place in town
where my father could buy those stupid bear figurines he collected.

I passed the store hundreds of times over the last few
weeks without running into Larry or Margo. On this cold sunny day, my luck ran
out.

My father was a tall man. At sixty, he remained
appealing to women. Despite his cold eyes, he possessed a head full of hair and
a sizable bank account. His latest wife Margo somehow managed to create the
lovely Lark and the beautifully bitchy Raven.

“Dad. Margo,” I said, hoping to keep walking.

Dad’s body language demanded I stop and talk. Likely
out of habit, I obeyed.

“Hello, Dylan,” Margo said from behind Dad.

Giving her a quick nod, I hoped Dad made the lecture
quick.

“Hello, son. Glad to see you got rid of that
ridiculous hairstyle of yours. I also heard your business was expanding too.
Rumor even has it that you’re dating a preacher’s daughter. I thought my
embarrassment of a son had finally cleaned up his act.”

The sad part was this bullshit was the closest my
father had gotten to complimenting me in years.

“Unfortunately, I hear your business is helping the
Johanssons, making it likely a front for money laundering. Plus, that preacher
is an ex-con thug.”

Opening my mouth to put Larry in his place, I really
wanted to slug him. Violence and cussing wouldn’t fix anything. Not with a guy
like Larry. He’d have me arrested as another form of revenge for taking Lark’s
side over his.

Before I could make a move I’d likely regret, Dad
focused behind me. I followed his gaze and found Judd staring at us behind
mirrored glasses.

“Have we met?” Larry asked in a gruff tone that made
Margo flinch.

“Naw, but I’ve seen you around. You’re the big city
council guy, right?” Judd muttered, shaking his hand really hard based on my
dad’s grimace.

“Larry,” Dad said, tugging his hand away.

“People call me The Ripper. I got that name in prison
from this thing I’d did when people messed with me or my friends. See,” Judd
said, stepping closer and lowering his voice, “I’d shove these two fingers…”
Judd paused to show his index and middle finger. “Up a guy’s asshole and tear
open that real tender spot between the hole and the balls. You know that spot,
don’t you, Larry?”

My father gave a little nod and Judd stepped back.

“Yeah, well, it was a thing I did back then and I’ve
done it from time to time since. That’s why people call me The Ripper. Funny
story, huh?”

Larry struggled to hide his disgust, but his fear was
clearly on display.

“It was nice meeting you, Ripper,” he said, taking
Margo by the elbow.

“The Ripper,” Judd corrected.

“Mister The Ripper. Have a good day.”

“Right back at you, Larry.”

My father hurried to his car and shoved Margo inside.
I watched them speed away then frowned at Judd. He was eyeing leaves swirling
around in the cold breeze.

“I didn’t know you did time,” I said, instead of
asking about that whole ass thing.

“I didn’t,” Judd said, lifting his glasses to wink at
me. “Vaughn bet me I couldn’t use the phrase ‘stuck my fingers up a guy’s ass’
in a threat. Now, he owes me a hundred bucks.”

“I guess a guy like you can say he sticks his fingers
up a guy’s ass and no one gives him shit. If I said that, well…”

“You’re a candy ass? Is that what you’re saying?” When
I shrugged, Judd punched me in the gut. I sensed he was teasing me, but it hurt
anyway. “You attacked cold ass killers with a hammer. You also stepped up and
helped Nick when his dad and those assholes showed up. I think your problem is
you lead a soft life and you confuse that for being a soft man.”

“My life is pretty soft.”

Judd sized me up. “Wanna toughen it up, kid?”

“How?” I asked, suspicious.

“I like how you worry. Only a stupid fuck would trust
a guy who rips out guys’ assholes,” Judd said, grinning. “You ever go
paintballing?”

“No.”

“You know how to shoot?”

“A little.”

“Well,” Judd said, gesturing for me to follow him to
his bike. “With Cooper taking over the business, Kirk wanted to have a
get-together with some outside friends. You get how I can’t be more specific
than that, right?”

When I nodded, Judd continued, “So next spring,
friends from Memphis are visiting Ellsberg to have a meet and greet. Part of
that is going to be a paintball match or two. A lot of Kirk’s guys aren’t so fast
on the draw anymore, so he’s looking to prep the younger guys.”

“And you want me to prep with you?”

“You and Winnie still getting along okay?”

“Yeah, she’s my woman.”

Judd nodded. “If she and you end up together for good,
I see you being more than just crew material. Cooper needs loyal guys. Smart
guys who aren’t only muscle. He’d like Nick to help out, but school boy doesn’t
want to get his hands dirty. I get that, but I think you’d look good dirty.”

I wasn’t sure what to make of Judd’s offer. Despite my
uncertainty, no way would I give up a chance to paintball with guys like Judd.

“Sounds good. What do I have to do?”

“Just show up at Kirk’s place at nine on Saturday
morning. We’ll gear up and create teams. Then it’s just the first of many
practices. The guys from Memphis do this shit constantly. If we don’t get
ourselves organized, they’ll destroy us. Cooper will be pissed if that
happens.”

“Saturday morning. Got it.”

Judd glanced at where Larry had stood. “Your dad is a
fuckwit. You’re lucky you don’t take after him.”

Smirking, I watched Judd disappear down the road.

My life had taken a lot of turns since I stood up to
my dad. My business was more successful. I had friends who wouldn’t ditch me on
my dad’s orders. I’d found a woman I imagined building a life with too. As long
as I refused to step back into my father’s way of thinking, the good times
could continue.

My first trip out of the house after my freak out was
to get a manicure and pedicure with the girls. We met at the beauty salon and
sat in a line with our feet out. Harlow refused to come along though I
suspected her fingers needed pampering more than anyone’s.

“What do you know about sexy sex?” Raven asked from a
few chairs down from me.

“Isn’t it like regular sex?”

“No. For one thing, it feels good.”

Feeling awkward now, I nodded.

“There are sexy phrases that turn guys on,” Raven
continued.

Bailey snorted. “This isn’t going to be your ‘your
cock is the key that opens my treasure chest,’ is it? I tried that on Nick and
he laughed. Not in a horny way either. He thought I was drunk on cold meds.”

“You probably said it wrong.”

Tawny smirked. “There’s no real way to say that right,
Raven. It’s dumb.”

“Did you even try it?”

“No, but I did tell Judd about it, so he’d feel
superior to Vaughn. It totally worked and he fucked me spectacularly as a thank
you. Hey, maybe that’s how it needs to be used.”

Raven glared at Tawny. “It works. Trust me that Vaughn
loves that stuff.”

“He’s a horny freak,” Bailey muttered. “Doesn’t everything
get him ready?”

Raven flipped them off then turned back to me. “Did
you mention that thing I taught you? The one where you talk about him being
inside you? Guys like the idea of exploring new territory.”

“Like Lewis and Clark,” Farah said, playing with her
phone.

When everyone laughed, I did too. Yet I was nervous
about remembering their advice.

“Lick your lips a lot,” Bailey suggested.

Maddy shook her head. “That’ll get him thinking about
blowjobs. Don’t bend over too much either because then he’ll think of butt
action.”

“Wow, now I know way too much information about how my
brother fucks you,” Bailey grunted. “Today is a real learning experience.”

Tawny pushed Raven back and leaned over her to see me.
“Dylan has more experience than you. Let him take charge and learn what you
like. All this sexy line crap is stupid. He already wants you and I’m sure any
green light will get him ready to go.”

“Now I’m focusing on my brother getting laid,” Raven
complained. “Huh, I guess I should have seen that coming.”

Bailey rolled her eyes. “Tucker’s been my brother
longer, so my whine is more sympathetic.”

“Not really,” Raven said, slapping Bailey’s arm.

Eyes narrowing, Bailey hissed. “Bring it.”

“I’m getting the water bottle out,” Farah warned,
setting aside her phone. “Let’s stop talking about Winnie and Dylan having sex.
It’s freaking her out.”

When they all looked at me, I faked as if I didn’t
feel put on the spot. Based on their expressions, I wasn’t successful.

“The first time is always awkward,” Farah said.

Now everyone looked at her and she faked a casual
expression. “Isn’t it?”

Tawny shook her head. “My first time was really hot,
but it was with Judd.”

Her sister glared at her, but Tawny only smiled.

Raven grinned. “Vaughn went down on me as soon as we
got into his apartment. I was immediately a fan of his moves.”

“He’s whipped,” Bailey said, shaking her head. “What a
girly bitch you have there.” When Raven smacked her again, Bailey growled,
“Bitch, it’s coming.”

“Ooh, I’m terrified, princess.”

“How about you, Maddy?” I asked, ignoring Raven and
Bailey’s staring contest.

“It was great,” she said with a little smile. “I mean,
I think it was. I don’t really know. We were pretty drunk, but I remember
thinking he looked so hot naked. Yeah, it was great.”

“So the only one who can’t fuck correctly is Cooper,”
Bailey announced. “More info about my brother’s dongs that I didn’t need.”

“If you don’t want to hear about your brothers plowing
their wives, stop hanging out with us,” Maddy muttered, opening a magazine.
“I’m not interested in you telling us about getting porked either, but I keep
my mouth shut.”

Bailey sighed. “Nick sure porks me good.”

Everyone laughed since Bailey was completely serious.

“I can’t wait until Lark has her litter,” Bailey said
once the laughter died down. “That way, she can have fun with us.”

Farah rubbed her growing bump. “I suspect she’ll be
busy caring for her litter.”

“We’ll ditch Raven with the babies while Lark has fun
with us. She’s the better sister anyway.”

Raven leaned over to Bailey and whispered, “Lark talks
shit about you when you’re not around.”

“Don’t buy it,” Bailey said, waving her off. “Lark is
a sweet pixy with eyes like stars. You’re the rotten skank version of her.”

“Why are you two fighting so much?” Tawny grumbled.

“We’re not fighting,” Bailey balked. “You’re too
sensitive, Tawny. I mean that in a nice way because of how I’m a nice person.”

“She really is,” Raven said.

Tawny glared at them both. “Blondes.”

“Yeah,” Maddy said, caressing her blonde locks. “We’re
so awful that the rest of you look bad in comparison.”

Bailey and Raven high-fived Maddy while Tawny switched
seats to sit next to her sister. Watching their easy confidence, I felt lost in
the conversation.

Eventually, I daydreamed while they shared sex stories
and in-jokes. During their louder moments, I decided my outing wouldn’t end
with my pretty nails. Though I told Mom and Dad I would come home afterwards, I
drove to Lark’s house.

The dogs ran to the door when I arrived and followed
me around until Lark woke from her nap.

“Surprise,” I said, helping her out of bed. “Raven
will be over later. First she wanted to be alone with Vaughn.”

“Did you guys talk a lot about sex? That’ll get her
worked up every time.”

Nodding, I smiled while propping her feet up.

“I will get you lunch then I’m going to do your
nails.”

Lark wiped her sleepy eyes and smiled brightly. “I
want to be pretty just like all you cool kids.”

“It won’t be long before you can go out and have fun
again.”

Lark rubbed her belly as I made her lunch. She was still
caressing the bouncing bump when I returned.

“They’re kicking like crazy,” she said, placing the
plate on her stomach. “I don’t think they’re going to make it to my due date.”

“It’ll be okay,” I said softly, though I worried too.

Lark enjoyed her salad while watching
Judge Judy
.
Once she finished eating, I sat on the table with her feet resting on the
pillow on my lap. We decided on painting the nails on her left side blue and
the ones on her right side pink.

“When the babies come,” she said, smiling as I painted
her toenails, “I’ll be in the hospital for a few days at least. My in-laws want
to have us stay with them for a week or so afterwards. My OB says he only does C-sections
for multiples, so I know I’ll be dealing with the pain of that. Anyway, while
I’m on the mend, you can have a vacation.”

“I can help if you want.”

“Aaron and his family have everything planned, so I’m
going to let them run things. Once I feel like me again, I’ll be the boss
again,” she said, giving me a wink. “I’m sure I’ll be overwhelmed with two of
them ganging up on me. So yeah, I’ll need your help once we’re home.”

“I’m good with babies,” I said, blowing on her toes.
“I freaked out when I had mine, but I’m not like that anymore. I watch babies
at church all the time.”

“You were just a kid when you had your baby,” Lark
whispered. “I would have freaked out too.”

“It’s hard to move around once the C-section starts to
heal. I remember it hurt more the second day than the first. I also remember
that people made a big deal out of me not getting constipated.”

Lark laughed. “How romantic for Aaron to spend our
first year worrying about my pooping.”

I smiled. “He’s going to look so sexy holding a baby.
I remember thinking Kirk was so scary even though he was always nice to me.
Then I saw him carrying around Sawyer and he never seemed scary again. Big
strong guys holding babies are really sexy.”

Lark adjusted on the couch. “Don’t make me horny
please. I have no outlet. Orgasms are off limits.”

“Why?”

“It can bring on labor.”

“Oh. I didn’t learn much about pregnancy when I was
pregnant. I just did what people told me to do. I never even felt like the baby
was mine.”

Lark placed her hands on a pillow while I painted her
fingers.

“Because you knew he was going to be adopted?”

“No,” I said softly. “When I felt him moving around in
me, back before I came to live in Ellsberg, I assumed he would die. A part of
me kept thinking that even after he was born.”

Blowing on her wet nails, I held her gaze. “I was
messed up back then.”

“It’ll be different when you’re ready. Hell, I wasn’t
ready, but I had met the man of my dreams and was in love. Ready or not, we’re
having our babies soon.”

“Not too soon hopefully.”

Lark sighed. “Soon.”

We held each other’s gazes and I saw her worry. Soon
though, she was cooing over her nails. She loved being pampered so much that we
played with her hair next. By the time Aaron arrived home with dinner, his muse
was a sexy round goddess.