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Authors: Dornford Yates

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“And I said you wouldn’t go. And nor you have.”

“Technically, no. But the Boche has come to you.”

“I expect you’re right,” said Mansel.

“You know I’m right,” said Friar. “That’s why you’re here.”

“As you please.”

“Do you still refuse to come in?”

“Be your age,” said Mansel.

Friar raised his eyebrows.

“An equivocal saying,” he said.

“Then let me be plain. I do not deal with thieves or with murderers. Except as I have – and shall. And I never submit to blackmail.”

Friar lighted a cigarette.

“Fine words,” he said.

“Plain words. You are a thief and you are a murderer. I never strike a bargain with people like that.”

“You don’t think much of me?”

Mansel shrugged his shoulders.

“Palin beat you,” he said.

I saw the man wince.

“That’s perfectly true,” he said. “I slipped up there.”

“If Palin could beat you,” said Mansel, “I think I can.”

“You’d be much wiser,” said Friar, “to do a deal.”

“Wiser, yes. But so far I have clean hands.”

“You’ve killed your man, Captain Mansel.”

“That’s as may be. I repeat that I have clean hands.”

“Goat was a blackguard,” said Friar.

“It ill became his confederate to put him down. Dog shouldn’t eat dog, you know.”

Friar threw back his head and laughed.

“It is now seven years,” he said, “since I left the narrow path. At the time at which I did so, I made up my mind to one thing – never to resent insult from the caste which had been mine.”

“A prudent decision,” said Mansel.

“On occasion, it has stood me in stead. And how d’you think I do it?”

“I’ve no idea.”

“By minding a line of Virgil’s.
Forsan et haec olim meminisse juvabit
.” He rose to his feet. “Which, being interpreted, means ‘It is the last laugh that counts’.”

“That’s a very free translation,” said Mansel.

Friar looked at him very hard.

“Are you also among the scholars?”

“By no means. But I can translate
forsan
.”

I see. Well,
au revoir
.”

With that, he was gone.

As he rejoined the lady—

“And the true translation?” said I.

“‘The day may come when even this memory will make me smile.’”

“I see. And
forsan
?”

“Means ‘may’.”

“He’ll never forgive you,” I said, “for ‘dog eating dog’.”

“I said what I did, to make him step out of his ground. He covered up very well, but I think he must hate my guts. And when you hate a man’s guts, you desire to hit him for six.”

“He’s leaving,” said I.

“Good,” said Mansel. “We’ll give him half an hour’s start. And then we’ll use our back door. I mean, if it has come off, we shall see him again.”

Fifty-five minutes later, I peered through our sitting-room casement, to see a figure erect in an easy chair. I think that it held a pistol in either hand. But of this, I cannot be sure, for the light was dim.

When I made my report to Mansel—

“What could be better?” he said. “D’you think he came in this way?”

“There’s dirt on the window-sill.”

“Good,” said Mansel. “We’ll take him as he comes down.”

Friar did not come down for three hours – three of the longest that I have ever spent. But they must have been long for him.

As he turned, after reaching the ground, Mansel hit him square on the point of the chin.

I went for Bell and Carson, who were waiting at the front of the house.

By the time I was back, Mansel had searched the man, to find two pistols, his passport, his notecase and nothing else.

Mansel addressed the servants.

“Turn out the Rolls very quietly and keep her here in the yard. In five minutes’ time we shall come down as he did, and then we’ll be off.”

With that, we went round to the front and entered the house with our key.

In our rooms we went through the notecase, to see what it held. But there was nothing but money and two or three visiting cards. These bore no address, but the name of a London Club. I should not think of saying which Club it was; but it bears a distinguished name and it stands in Pall Mall.

As he locked the pistols away—

“Pillows and blankets,” said Mansel. “The man is seriously ill. We’re rushing him to Munich, in the hope of saving his life. He’s had special treatment there from a doctor he knows. A car is to meet us halfway, at —.”

Five minutes later we were upon the road.

The plan was a very good plan, but it was very bold. To cross the frontier with Friar was easier said than done. But Mansel was a master of bluff, and would jest with Customs Officials while I dared not trust my voice.

Happily, the frontier was close, though when we came to the post the sky was pale.

While Bell and I succoured Friar – the man was still unconscious, for Mansel knew how to hit – the latter swept the officers off their feet. ‘It’s a matter of life and death. As you see, we’ve come straight from a party: we haven’t had time to change.’ They came and peered at the figure, pillowed and rugged. And then they stamped his passport and let us go.

So we entered Germany…

After thirty miles we turned off, and when we were deep in the country, we set the man down.

We kept his passport and notecase and propped him against a tree, with his face to the rising sun. Then we re-entered the Rolls, bypassed the little town at which Mansel had said we were meeting another car, and then returned through this to the frontier post.

Ten minutes later we were on Austrian soil.

As I heaved a sigh of relief—

“I hope and believe,” said Mansel, “that Friar will be off our map for nearly a week. He dare not go to the police, for if the police get on to us, well, we know he killed Goat. He’ll have to go to a Consul, to get another passport – and that will not be issued for several days. Inquiries will have to be made and references taken up. Besides, he’s got to get money.”

“He’s badly placed,” said I. “And Palin said his German was very poor.”

“It’s a question of time. If he has friends in Munich, they can identify him, and push the thing through. But unless he has friends in Munich, he’ll have to wait.”

“What would you do?” said I.

“Wire to London for funds, get a pass from the Consul for England – he’d give him that – go to the Passport Office and start again. In case he does that, we’ll post his passport back to the Passport Office. That will complicate things, especially if we amend it before it goes.”

I began to laugh.

“Your score’s mounting up,” I said.

“That doesn’t matter, if we can get a good start. Besides, for all we know, the Boche is sitting at Hohenems… In which case, Friar’s score is very much longer than mine. There should be a letter from Palin, when we get in.”

And so there was.

 

Dear Mansel,

Things might be worse.

The police did not find the ladder. I ‘discovered’ it later – to their delight. There were then no fingerprints.

This will show you better than anything I can say their standards of efficiency. But since, as you know, the greater a man’s inefficiency, the more officious he is, the steward, the staff and myself have been driven nearly out of our minds. Great offence, for instance, was taken, because one of the maids could not spell her mother’s maiden name.

And now to business.

The Boche was there. He took no sort of action: he never opened his mouth: he only looked on. But I don’t think he missed very much. The movement of the carpet interested him no end. I found him still staring upon it, after the others had gone. And he entered the dungeons and every room on the passage beyond where the carpet was found. In a word, he perceived the obvious – that the robbers had need of the carpet to help them to what they sought. He is a tall, fair man, with burning eyes. A brutal mouth and, I fancy, immensely strong. He was used with a great respect, which he clearly despised. The murder did not interest him. Nor did the statements made. He had eyes for the steward and me. Since he never spoke, it was extremely difficult to read his mind. I think he is quite satisfied that the thieves came for something the staff did not know was there. And I think he is wondering whether, in fact, the thieves went empty away. I did what I could to suggest that they did not. ‘But nothing is missing,’ says the steward. ‘Are you sure there was nothing in some coffer of which you did not know? I mean, the murder looks like a quarrel over the loot.’ And so on… But I fear we shall see him again.

As I write, a wire from John Ferrers arrives. So you all arrive on Thursday. Well and good.

A night-watchman is now on duty, as we arranged.

Let me confess that I am clean out of my depth. I was not made for such things. And my association with Friar has taken from me that which I had. Indeed, I am painfully aware that your little finger is thicker than my loins.

 

Yours ever,

Andrew Palin.

 

“As Palin says,” said Mansel, “it might be worse. And the Boche is not very smart. The trouble is he’s devilish thorough.

“He knows that Hohenems Castle belongs to an Englishman: and he knows that all English landlords must, if they have any sense, be thinking of getting out. Well, there’s no reason why they shouldn’t. But they won’t be allowed to take just anything. Supposing the Ferrers had a dinner service of gold. That they would have to declare, and I’m perfectly sure that the Customs would never let it go through. It wouldn’t be seized: it’d just have to stay in the country. So the Ferrers would go, but their service would stay behind. And one day the Boche would take it.

“Thanks to Friar, the suspicions of the Boche are aroused. He thinks that there is at the Castle a treasure of sorts. It may be gold plate or gold bars: it may be anything: but it must be of considerable value, if even the steward has no idea that it’s there. So the Ferrers’ goings and comings – must be very carefully watched.

“As we know, they’re arriving at Salzburg this afternoon. If they were to leave again, a week from today, I’ll lay their baggage would be ransacked and that, if they travelled by car, the Customs would search the tyres.

“And now for a bath and some breakfast. We’ll rest this afternoon.”

That morning we dealt with Friar’s passport.

This had, of course, been stamped when he entered Austria. Above this stamp, Mansel wrote in German, ‘Permit exit: refer re-entry to Police HQ.’ Then he wrote on a slip in English, ‘Found in Germany by the side of the Salzburg road.’ This he laid in the passport: then he covered the latter and addressed it as he had said.

The notecase, we sent to Friar’s Club, marking the envelope, ‘Not to be forwarded.’

It had been arranged that John and Olivia Ferrers should be at Salzburg that evening and stay at The — Hotel. There Mansel and I would dine – and meet them ‘by accident’. They would there and then invite us to Hohenems, and we should proceed there together, upon the following day. So all would seem natural enough. They had come out by air; and a Hohenems car would fetch them and lead us in.

At half past eight that evening, we entered The — Hotel.

We had left our coats and were passing through the
foyer
when there was John Ferrers beside me, touching my arm.

I like to think we did the encounter justice…

Then he led us across to Olivia, lovely as ever, in blue. “Now, isn’t that nice?” she says. “I knew you were out of England, but someone said you were in France.” She turned to her companion. “Captain Mansel and Mr Chandos – Miss Diana Revoke. Her sister was one of my friends, when I was at school.”

We, all of us, bowed and smiled, although we had met before. Not officially, of course. But each knew who the other was.

Miss Revoke was the good-looking girl who had been dining with Friar on Wednesday night.

2:  From Pillar to Post

Diana Revoke was speaking.

“Mr Chandos, who
is
Mr Friar?”

I looked at the big, blue eyes, twelve inches from mine.

“I really couldn’t tell you,” I said. “We know one another by sight, but we’ve never conversed.”

“He seems to know all about you.”

I shrugged my shoulders.

“There’s little enough to know.”

“He said that you loved adventure.”

“I like it in reason,” I said. “But I’d much sooner hunt.”

“Are you being adventuresome now?”

“No,” said I, “I’m travelling. Often enough, in the summer, Mansel and I join up and wander abroad.”

“You don’t look a restless person. I should have thought you’d marry and settle down.”

“I have done both,” I said.

The lady’s eyes widened.

“Then, where’s your wife?”

“You must ask Olivia,” I said. “She left her two days ago.”

Diana put a hand to her chin.

“At your home?”

“Yes.”

“So she is alone in England, and you are overseas.”

“Full marks,” said I.

“But I’m sure you’re happy with her.”

“Very happy indeed,” said I.

“But you don’t take her with you, when you are on the job?”

“I don’t take her with me,” I said, “when I go abroad with Mansel for two or three weeks. He and I are very old friends, and Jenny–”

“Friar said you were on the job.”

I raised my eyebrows.

“I expect he knows best,” said I. “Is he adventuresome, too?”

“I couldn’t tell you,” said Diana. “I never set eyes on the man till two days ago. But he used to know my father, or so he says. And I think he must have known him, and known him well. Their Club was the same. That’s why I went out with him. He’s very entertaining, you know. And wonderfully young for his age.”

“That’s an impression,” said I, “that I had already formed.”

“How did you form it, Mr Chandos?”

“From a casual observation. He moves so well.”

And there, to my relief, John Ferrers put in his oar.

“I may call you ‘Diana’, mayn’t I? Olivia knows you so well.”

“I’ll answer to that,” says the lady.

I turned at once to Olivia, seated upon my right.

“Tell me of Jenny, Olivia. She wrote and told me that you’d been staying with her.”

“Won’t you return the compliment – just for a day or two?”

I looked across her to Mansel.

“Olivia invites us to Hohenems.”

Mansel leaned forward and smiled.

“What d’you know, William?”

“As soon as we leave the table, Olivia and you and I must have five minutes together, undisturbed.”

“Consider it done, William. Olivia and I will arrange it, before we get up.”

Then Olivia told me of Jenny and spoke of Maintenance.

Conversation became general.

When coffee at last was served, Olivia announced that we must go on to a nightclub, for half an hour.

Thereupon two taxis were summoned: and while John escorted Diana, I followed Olivia and Mansel into the second car.

“Who is this girl, Olivia?”

“Her father was your Military Attaché at Vienna some time before the war. He was a widower. She and her sister were both at school at Salzburg. She came just before I left. I stayed with them once in England, but, though he was then retired, they spent more time in Austria than anywhere else. They never stayed at Haydn – such was my home, I couldn’t invite a guest: and then I lost sight of them.”

I looked at Mansel.

“Friar’s been talking to her.” Olivia caught her breath. “About us, I mean. He’s told her we’re on the job, though he hasn’t said what. She’s – very curious.”

“Is she running with him?” said Mansel.

“I can’t be sure.”

Mansel fingered his chin.

Then—

“Invite her,” he said to Olivia. “Invite her, too.”

Olivia’s eyes widened.

“Not at the moment, Jonah?”

“At once, if you please. I’m pretty sure she’ll come – and I’d like her under our eye.”

“I’m in your hands, my dear.”

“Then do as I say, Olivia. I’m sorry to put this on you, but the omelette we’re out to make is no ordinary dish. I’ll be more explicit later.”

When the invitation was issued, I do not know: but issued it was – and accepted. When we left the following morning, Diana Revoke was sitting beside Olivia, in the back of the Hohenems car.

 

“I told you,” said Mansel, “you’d have to take her on.”

“Don’t be absurd,” said I. “If she is running with Friar, she’s much too clever for me. Besides, you hooked her and so you must play your fish.”

“She may require no playing. She may be innocent.”

“She’ll still be curious.”

“I wish we knew more about her. Never mind. Regard that prospect, William – the great house up on the hill, the hamlet peeping below it, the woods enfolding them both. If I had to name that place, I’d call it ‘Jack-i’-the-Green’.”

Our way was lovely indeed, rising and falling and curling through country as rich and as friendly as ever I saw. Some of it I had seen, when we had travelled to Salzburg five days before: but the latter part of the run was new to me, and, as we approached the castle, forest and hill and valley seemed to agree together to tell us a fairytale. This famous introduction, Hohenems justified; for it made an enchanting picture and seemed, to my simple mind, the womb of chivalry. Sunk in the woods, it hung on a mountainside, commanding a smiling valley, laced by a joyous stream: the gracious curve of its ramparts swelled out of a quilt of foliage, as I have seen a tiara swell out of a woman’s hair: and, on the left, twin towers were defying an elegant fall of water, blue and white – and laughing in the face of a sunshine that magnified all it touched.

Five hours after leaving Salzburg, the cars stole over the drawbridge and into the quiet courtyard, where Palin, with the steward behind him, was standing at the foot of the steps.

As he kissed Olivia’s hand—

“The keys,” said Palin, “should be on a velvet cushion, for you to touch. Still, a cold collation is ready – I passed the menu, myself. And all is – well.” Here he was introduced to Diana Revoke. “My report shall be rendered later. John, you’re going my way and putting on weight. And there are Mansel and Chandos. You know, I feel diminished when they are about. They always recall the man who slew a lion in a pit on a snowy day.”

It was after lunch, when Olivia had taken Diana out of the way, that we strolled with our host on the ramparts and listened to Palin’s report.

“The Boche is active. He came here yesterday, in his vulgar, vile-bodied car. This time, the man was alone, and I ventured to ask his business. After some patent indecision whether to answer or no, he said he was ‘of the police’ and had been desired to unravel this very peculiar crime. At this I declared my pleasure and asked him which of the servants he wished to see. He replied that it was his intention to study the scene. I, therefore, proposed to take him down to the meadows: but that didn’t suit his book: he wanted to visit the passage in which the carpet was found. Well, that was all right by me, and we went there at once. But I fear he was disappointed. You see, I’d decided to have some rooms turned out… And the passage was three parts full of benches and chests and arras and servants and buckets and brooms. Progress was just possible, provided you watched your step; but the industry was against him, and after he’d hit his knee on the edge of a Spanish coffer of a quite incredible weight, he spoke at some length of swinehounds and of the destruction of clues. At that, I drew myself up and asked him to make himself clear. He replied that I should have known better than to ‘desecrate’ the scene of the crime. To that I rejoined that this wasn’t the scene of the crime: that if he visited that, he would find the spot roped off: that, when, in England, a gentleman’s house had been entered, it was usual to cleanse the rooms which the thieves might have used. To that, he made no answer, except to look very black: and, making his knee his excuse, he presently took his leave. But I think we shall see him again.”

“Be sure of that,” said Mansel. “Friar’s done his stuff, all right. He’s set the Boche on. And the Boche is painfully thorough. He’s sure that there’s something here and he feels that, after this scare, you will be disposed to unearth it and put it in some safe place. So, if he keeps on coming ‘to visit the scene of the crime’, he may discern some traces of what you have done. That is why your spring-cleaning upset him – that was a very good move. But he has an instinct, this man: and we must make sure of his movements before we start. I mean, if he reappeared when we were in the midst of the job…” Palin covered his face. “Exactly. And that is the very thing that this wallah might do.” He turned to John Ferrers. “From first to last, John, how many hours will it take us to get the gems out?”

“Four,” said John. “I think we might do it in less. But the poison may hold us up.”

Rodrigo Borgia’s age was a poisoner’s age; and his gems had been laid up in linen which had been previously steeped in some deadly bane. This had the way of strychnine with such as unwrapped the gems: and though, in four hundred years, it must have lost some of its power, enough had survived to condemn three of Punter’s colleagues to a most dreadful death. To this the Ferrers and Palin could, all three, speak; for they had watched the felons unwrap the gems. The linen, then so much dust, had covered their hands and had settled upon their faces, while they worked: as like as not, they had drawn it into their lungs. Be that as it may, before they had gathered their spoil, all three had been attacked and, after some hideous convulsions, had died in agony.

“Not for long,” said Mansel. “I’m ready for that. Four hours from beginning to end. I take it you’ve room in your safe?”

“More than enough: but I think we should clean them first.”

“So we will. D’you think we could do the business on Sunday night?”

“Why not?” said John.

“That will give us two days in which to locate the Boche and see that he doesn’t ‘come down, like a wolf on the fold’.”

“And Friar?” said Palin.

“Unless I am greatly mistaken, Friar will be unavoidably prevented from attending, or even attempting to attend, the operation.”

“And from watching the waterfall? Where the water emerges, I mean. If he was, a sudden failure of water would tell him that we were off.”

“Well done,” said Mansel, laughing. “So it would. But Friar has a previous engagement, and I cannot think he’ll be free before Tuesday next.”

With that, he related in detail what we had done. As he made an end—

“Which brings me,” he said, “to Miss Diana Revoke. I felt it was better to have her under our eye: and so I desired Olivia to make her her guest. Now I think the thing to do is to let her in on this show. That will argue our faith in her: and she can do us no harm, unless she can contact Friar: and that, without our consent, will be most difficult. Of course, she may be honest: that, Time will show. And now discourse to me, Palin. I want to pick up the Boche.”

“He’ll be at Robin,” said Palin: “he came with the Robin police. And once you see him, you’ll know him – no doubt about that. His car is a bilious green and bears a swastika flag.”

“And how far is Robin?” said Mansel.

“Forty-five miles.”

 

On the following morning we saw the German, ourselves. The man was leaving the police-station, and we were within a café on the opposite side of the street: since this was narrow enough and the windows of the café were open, we saw him extremely well, though he did not see us.

He looked the beast he was: and when I say ‘beast’, I mean ‘a dangerous beast’. He was tall and thickset, and his jaw was almost square, because, I imagine, his teeth were forever clenched. So malignant and bitter was his aspect, he gave the impression of being unable to smile, and his eyes seemed to be aflame, as Palin had said.

Over the rim of his tankard, Mansel was speaking low. “‘The glass of
German
fashion, and the mould of
German
form.’”

“A wolf in wolf’s clothing,” I said. “See how they’re bowing him out: but I’ll lay they hate his guts.”

“They fear him,” said Mansel. “That is why he was sent here. To peaceloving folk, he is a fearful man. By God, these Germans know how to do their stuff.”

“I give them nothing,” said I. “Because your hand is of iron, you don’t have to wear a barbed glove.”

“You’re perfectly right, Aristides. And now come along, – he’s going to take his car.”

Thanks to Palin’s description, we had already located the German’s car. This was berthed under some trees, a little way off: and Carson, at the wheel of the Rolls, was waiting as close as he dared.

The man was easy to follow and led us at once to a decent, private house on the skirts of the town. The residence might have been his, for he left his car in the drive directly before the front door and then ascended the steps, to let himself in with a key.

“And very nice, too,” said Mansel. “I think we’ll come back when he’s gone.”

And so we did – at a quarter past three o’clock.

This time we came on foot and we went to the back of the house. In the kitchen, a nice looking woman was ironing a dung-coloured shirt with a bright red stripe.

“Good afternoon, Madam,” says Mansel, raising his hat. “Surely it is not your duty to iron the shirt of the Boche.”

“No, sir,” said the woman. “It isn’t. But what can I do? When my husband was ordered to lodge him, the servants left. And so I must wait upon his highness, lest worse befall. I must prepare his breakfast and take it up to his room. Our salon is at his disposal; our bedroom is his. He never opens his mouth, except to complain or to threaten. I have, sir, to clean his shoes – and I am an Austrian woman, the wife of an Austrian lawyer and the daughter of an Austrian judge.”

“Madam,” said Mansel, “you have my sympathy. My friend and I are English–”

“Alas, sir, we fought against you.”

“Against your will. We know that it was the Boche that forced your hand. England and Austria were always friends.”

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