Conklin's Blueprints (14 page)

Biting my lip I slowly peeked past the door.  He was sleeping on my bed, facing the other wall.  Holy shit, I don’t think I slept with him.  He still had clothes on, so we couldn’t have done anything.  I was afraid to ask him.  Hell I was afraid to look at him.  I needed to find some pants, shorts, something to cover my lower half so I wasn’t just in my lacy black underwear and T-shirt.  I quickly saw some shorts lying on the floor.  I threw them on, not really sure what I was going to do next.  I really wanted to go back to sleep, my head was throbbing.  I need to stop drinking so much.  I took a deep breath and walked into my bedroom.  Carefully lying down, I grabbed a pillow and hugged it, facing away from him.  I tried to stay as far over as possible.  I could hear his gentle breathing.  I was suddenly curious and slowly rolled over.  I studied his back.  I could see his muscles through his white T-shirt.  He must have taken off his green dress shirt before lying down with me, right after I begged him to stay.  How pathetic am I?  I had the urge to reach out and trace the lines of his muscles over his shirt, but I withheld.  He started to stir, quickly sitting up, as though he wasn’t sure where he was.  He rubbed his face and then turned his head to look at me.  I wanted to close my eyes and pretend I was still sleeping, but I didn’t think of it quick enough.  He dropped his hands from his face and gave me a lazy smile. “Good morning, how are you feeling?” His voice was deep and husky from just waking up.

“I’ve been better,” I said.  I quickly sat up, putting the pillow over my lap. “I’m so, so sorry about last night, I can’t believe how I acted…”

He turned on the bed so he could face me, “Why are you sorry?  I was the one who took it too far.” He looked ashamed.  I furrowed my eyebrows, not understanding what he was talking about.  The only advances I remembered were ones I did.  He bit his lip with worried eyes. 

“I’m sorry, I don’t remember…” I trailed off with embarrassment.

He relaxed his shoulders and gave me a wry smile, “I don’t know if that is a good or bad thing.”

I let my mind reel, trying to piece the night together; a slow chill crept up my spine as I realize what moment he was talking about.  It wasn’t his fault, he stopped after all.  I tilted my head and looked into his troubled eyes.  “Tyler, you stopped.  You were acting fine.  I wanted it just as bad as you, I just let my past haunt me.  I should be the one who is sorry,” I whispered.

“Why should you be sorry?” he scoffed. “I was treating you like a bar fly.”

I shrugged my shoulders,
I was acting like one.

He glared at me.  “Stop, you are not a bar fly.  You do, however, have a very low tolerance for alcohol and are very entertaining under the influence,” his glare turned into a smirk.

I glared at his smirk, and he quickly changed his expression, “I’m sorry, you are fun when you drink, that is all I meant to say.  I enjoyed last night,” he was sincere.

I tried to smile at him.  I was all kinds of emotions.  How could he have enjoyed last night?  I remember crying and breaking down in front of him, basically spilling that I was a whore for a year.  My God, I must have looked like a mess with my makeup spilling down my face.  My cheeks heated at the thought.

“Please, don’t be embarrassed,” he smiled, trying to meet my eyes with his.

Not looking at him, I started to stand from the bed, his eyes following me.  “I’m going to take a quick shower if you don’t mind,” I mumbled. 

He smirked back at me, “Go ahead, I can make us some breakfast.  Anything sound good?”

The thought of food made my stomach turn.  He noticed and laughed, “Maybe just some tea?  You shower, I will get myself in order, and then we can sleep.”

Sleep?  It actually sounded amazing, some tea and then sleep.  The perfect hangover cure, and he did say that was what he normally did on Sundays.

“Ok,” I stifled a smile, and hurried into my bathroom closing the door.  I heard him laugh as he stood up.  Quickly turning the shower on, I stepped in under the warm water.  It felt amazing to get all the makeup and sticky bar feeling off my skin.  I washed my body twice, trying not to think about how ridiculous I had acted last night with him, but he truly didn’t seem to be annoyed or bothered by my actions, but they would haunt me.

Once I was out of the shower I towel dried my hair and threw on my robe.  I forgot to grab my clothes from my drawers before I came in.  I would have to quickly get in and out and maybe Tyler would still be out getting breakfast.  Some food would actually be good for my stomach.  I quickly tip toed out to my room and rummaged through my drawers.  I wasn’t going to put anything crazy on, just some gym shorts and a T-shirt.  I decided on a cute matching light blue underwear set, just in case.  My phone chirped just as I was going to go out in the living room.  I went and grabbed it and saw it was a text from Tyler.

I locked the door behind me if you changed your mind about breakfast, otherwise I will be knocking in about 10 minutes. -Tyler

I giggled at his message.  I might be mortified about my behavior last night, but I would give anything to see his smile again.  Smiling, I quickly padded my feet out to the front door, unlocking it.  I texted Tyler, telling him the door was unlocked, as I went back into my room to put some socks on.  I forgot about how cold the hardwood floor was.

I heard the door open and footsteps walking into the kitchen, followed by the sound of things hitting the counter top.  I walked down the hall to find Tyler fumbling through a grocery bag.  He turned to me and smiled.  “How is your stomach?  Can I make you an omelet?”

Suddenly feeling hungry, I nodded to him. Some real food would probably help my hangover.   His smile got wider as he moved further into the kitchen.  It looked like he had fresh clothes on, faded jeans and a Cubs T-shirt.  Did I take that long in the shower for him to be able to go to the store and home to get clean clothes?  Oh well, it didn’t matter, he stayed with me last night when I was a drunken mess and wanted to make me breakfast.

“Where are your pans?” he asked.  I pointed to the drawer below the kitchen island. 

I walked over to him.  “Can I help you?” I asked, opening the cupboard to grab some plates.

He shook his head.  “No, I want to make you breakfast, sit and relax.  Did you take some Tylenol?” His face was concerned.

I nodded my head and smiled at him, “I feel okay, but in about an hour I’m going to need to lie back down.”

“Well, I better cook fast then.”

He was fun to watch move around my kitchen, constantly asking me where things were.  It didn’t take him long to make both of us omelettes, and before I knew it, we were sitting next to each other enjoying breakfast.  I took a sip of my tea as I finished the omelet.  “That was really good, thank you.  I didn’t deserve this.”

He shook his head at me, “Of course you did.”  I took his plate and put it in the dishwasher along with the pan and spatula.  I felt his eyes watching my every move. 

He slowly stood up as I turned to face him.  He was so handsome and looked so young in jeans and a basic T-shirt, his hair still floppy from last night.  “How’s your head?” he asked, breaking the silence.

“It will be better after I lay down,” I squeaked, leaning back against the sink, not taking my eyes from his.  I small grin came upon his lips.  “Don’t let me stop you, I’m pretty tired as well…” he trailed off.  Did he want me to invite him to sleep next to me again? 

Keeping my eyes on him, I walked towards the hallway to my room, and not missing a beat, he followed behind me.  I was hoping he would put his hands on my hips and nuzzle my neck, but I decided he had a touching issue and it wasn’t going to happen.  Maybe he didn’t like it, or he was just uncomfortable with it?  He was constantly saying he wasn’t used to being touched.   Maybe he was inexperienced?   No, that couldn’t be it.  He was too attractive to not be experienced and his kisses were well rehearsed. 

We got to my room and laid on opposite sides of the bed.  It felt like there was a mile in-between us.  I grabbed a pillow and hugged it tight, taking in his soft expression.

“I really did have a good time last night, and I am really sorry about how aggressive I was,” there was guilt in his tone.

I wanted to reach out and touch his face, but we were so far apart on the bed.  “Tyler its fine, I was drunk, and I get a little… flirty…” I blushed.

His guilt turned into a grin.  “I like when you are flirty,” he whispered.  My heart skipped a beat.  Why was he talking like this?  Was he changing his mind about us dating?

“And a blubbering mess?  I revealed some demons to you last night… you probably lost a little respect for me,” my tone was painful.

Tyler quickly sat up on his elbow and leaned closer to me.  “I would never think that.  You were betrayed by people you cared about.  You were bound to act out somehow.”

It was hard for me to believe his words. I felt his hand slowly reach out to touch my cheek.  “Please believe me; I feel so close to you because of how honest you are with me.”

I half smiled at his gesture.  Now it was my turn to turn the attention on him.  “So close to me like a friend though, right?” I hoped he didn’t sense my disappointment.

He scooted closer to me, his eyes intently looking into mine.  “No, not like a friend.  I just, I don’t know how to do this.”

Confused, I asked, “Have you never dated anyone before?”

“No, not really.  I have always been focused on my work.  Women who come after me don’t turn me on.  I find them really annoying actually.”

I laughed, “And you weren’t annoyed with me last night?”

He laughed with me, “If you would have come on to me the first meeting, I wouldn’t have been annoyed with you.  Not after I saw you in the store paying for that lady.  It was so selfless of you.  I was fascinated and then how you stood up to Sawla and didn’t do it looking like a bitch; it was so respectful and tasteful.”  His eyes were soft and gentle.  He was telling the truth. 

“So you just have flings then, huh,” I said, giving him a coy glance.  He was far too attractive to abstain from sex.  I know he said girls that came onto him were annoying, but I doubted he always said no.

His face was stone serious.  “No, I’m not interested in one night stands.”

Holy cow, was he celibate?  He chuckled as though he read my mind. “My love life started out young, and I don’t want to go into detail, but I have made love to a woman before.”  My cheeks heated at his words.  I looked down at the bed, trying to avoid his eyes.  “Can I hold your hand?” he smirked, knowing I was uncomfortable with his revelation.  I held my hand out to him, and he grabbed it, lacing our fingers together.  I still didn’t understand his fascination with hand holding.

“Is that why you don’t want to date me?  Because you aren’t used to it?” I bravely asked.

He squeezed my hand tighter and laid his head back down on the pillow.

“I think you should try to sleep,” he quickly changed the subject. “Your head will start hurting if you don’t fall asleep soon.” I closed my eyes feeling rejected.  He pulled my hand up to his lips.  “Please, I don’t want to talk about that now, I’m too tired.  I know you want more of an explanation, but I can’t give it to you now.  Can I just peacefully sleep next to you, again?”

I nodded my head yes without opening my eyes.  I heard him exhale a deep breath and scoot even closer to me.  I could smell residual of his cologne from last night.  He clung to my hand, as though I would slip through his fingers at any moment, which I would, if he didn’t start talking soon.

~

I woke up to my phone gently ringing on the end table next to my bed.  By the time I could make my hands move to grab it, the call went to voicemail.  When I opened it up I saw it was my mom.  Crap.

I forgot to call her and tell her I wouldn’t be joining in on family dinner.  I rolled my eyes and set the phone on my bed and closed my eyes again.  I felt a hand slowly graze the back of my hand.  I forgot Tyler was sleeping next to me.  I casually opened my eyes and turned to look at him.  He had a sleepy expression on his face as he looked back at me.  “Feeling better?” he questioned.

I hadn’t even thought about how I felt.  My head wasn’t throbbing anymore; the food and the sleep seemed to do the trick.

“I feel pretty good actually, a little guilty because I forgot to call my mom and tell her I wouldn’t make it to family dinner,” I said, more so to myself than to Tyler.

He sat up and looked over at the clock.  “Want me to take you over there?  It’s only 4:00pm.”

I gave him a blank look.  Why would he want to come to my family dinner?  We weren’t “together.”  We barely knew each other.  How would I introduce him
?

Mom, Dad, this is my boss, Tyler Conklin.  I thought I would bring him to dinner.  We got drunk and almost slept together, so I thought it would be appropriate if you met.

“Why would you want to come to my family dinner?” I asked, giving him a puzzled look. 

He laughed, “Well, I just offered to take you, but if you would like me to come, I would be happy to accompany you.”

I let out a horrified laugh; I can’t believe I thought he wanted to come to my family dinner!

“Come on, let’s go.” He jumped off the bed. 

I sat up quickly.  “I don’t think that is a good idea,” I said a bit too frazzled.

“What?  Are you ashamed of me?” He used the same words I always used to him, but his voice had a tone of amusement. 

“Yeah, because bringing my boss’s boss to family dinner would be a normal thing to do,” I joked.

“I’m your friend too, you know,” he smirked, while walking over to my side of the bed.  He took my hands out of my lap and pulled me up to him.  I was thrown back by his gesture.  Still holding his hands, I bravely looked into his eyes.  They were soft and full of amusement. 

“Ty…” I didn’t know what I was going to say, I was so lost in the different shades of blues and greens in his eyes.

He looked at me affectionately.  “You don’t have to bring me to your family dinner.  I know I will have to earn that privilege.”  A slow grin came on my face.  I stood on my tip toes and kissed him on the cheek.  His smile turned boyish as he swung our hands.