Complete Works of Joseph Conrad (Illustrated) (332 page)

His generosity was not infinite, because he was a human being — and not a monster, as Mrs Verloc believed him to be.  He paused, and a snarl lifting his moustaches above a gleam of white teeth gave him the expression of a reflective beast, not very dangerous — a slow beast with a sleek head, gloomier than a seal, and with a husky voice.

“And when it comes to that, it’s as much your doing as mine.  That’s so.  You may glare as much as you like.  I know what you can do in that way.  Strike me dead if I ever would have thought of the lad for that purpose.  It was you who kept on shoving him in my way when I was half distracted with the worry of keeping the lot of us out of trouble.  What the devil made you?  One would think you were doing it on purpose.  And I am damned if I know that you didn’t.  There’s no saying how much of what’s going on you have got hold of on the sly with your infernal don’t-care-a-damn way of looking nowhere in particular, and saying nothing at all. . . . “

His husky domestic voice ceased for a while.  Mrs Verloc made no reply.  Before that silence he felt ashamed of what he had said.  But as often happens to peaceful men in domestic tiffs, being ashamed he pushed another point.

“You have a devilish way of holding your tongue sometimes,” he began again, without raising his voice.  “Enough to make some men go mad.  It’s lucky for you that I am not so easily put out as some of them would be by your deaf-and-dumb sulks.  I am fond of you.  But don’t you go too far.  This isn’t the time for it.  We ought to be thinking of what we’ve got to do.  And I can’t let you go out to-night, galloping off to your mother with some crazy tale or other about me.  I won’t have it.  Don’t you make any mistake about it: if you will have it that I killed the boy, then you’ve killed him as much as I.”

In sincerity of feeling and openness of statement, these words went far beyond anything that had ever been said in this home, kept up on the wages of a secret industry eked out by the sale of more or less secret wares: the poor expedients devised by a mediocre mankind for preserving an imperfect society from the dangers of moral and physical corruption, both secret too of their kind.  They were spoken because Mr Verloc had felt himself really outraged; but the reticent decencies of this home life, nestling in a shady street behind a shop where the sun never shone, remained apparently undisturbed.  Mrs Verloc heard him out with perfect propriety, and then rose from her chair in her hat and jacket like a visitor at the end of a call.  She advanced towards her husband, one arm extended as if for a silent leave-taking.  Her net veil dangling down by one end on the left side of her face gave an air of disorderly formality to her restrained movements.  But when she arrived as far as the hearthrug, Mr Verloc was no longer standing there.  He had moved off in the direction of the sofa, without raising his eyes to watch the effect of his tirade.  He was tired, resigned in a truly marital spirit.  But he felt hurt in the tender spot of his secret weakness.  If she would go on sulking in that dreadful overcharged silence — why then she must.  She was a master in that domestic art.  Mr Verloc flung himself heavily upon the sofa, disregarding as usual the fate of his hat, which, as if accustomed to take care of itself, made for a safe shelter under the table.

He was tired.  The last particle of his nervous force had been expended in the wonders and agonies of this day full of surprising failures coming at the end of a harassing month of scheming and insomnia.  He was tired.  A man isn’t made of stone.  Hang everything!  Mr Verloc reposed characteristically, clad in his outdoor garments.  One side of his open overcoat was lying partly on the ground.  Mr Verloc wallowed on his back.  But he longed for a more perfect rest — for sleep — for a few hours of delicious forgetfulness.  That would come later.  Provisionally he rested.  And he thought: “I wish she would give over this damned nonsense.  It’s exasperating.”

There must have been something imperfect in Mrs Verloc’s sentiment of regained freedom.  Instead of taking the way of the door she leaned back, with her shoulders against the tablet of the mantelpiece, as a wayfarer rests against a fence.  A tinge of wildness in her aspect was derived from the black veil hanging like a rag against her cheek, and from the fixity of her black gaze where the light of the room was absorbed and lost without the trace of a single gleam.  This woman, capable of a bargain the mere suspicion of which would have been infinitely shocking to Mr Verloc’s idea of love, remained irresolute, as if scrupulously aware of something wanting on her part for the formal closing of the transaction.

On the sofa Mr Verloc wriggled his shoulders into perfect comfort, and from the fulness of his heart emitted a wish which was certainly as pious as anything likely to come from such a source.

“I wish to goodness,” he growled huskily, “I had never seen Greenwich Park or anything belonging to it.”

The veiled sound filled the small room with its moderate volume, well adapted to the modest nature of the wish.  The waves of air of the proper length, propagated in accordance with correct mathematical formulas, flowed around all the inanimate things in the room, lapped against Mrs Verloc’s head as if it had been a head of stone.  And incredible as it may appear, the eyes of Mrs Verloc seemed to grow still larger.  The audible wish of Mr Verloc’s overflowing heart flowed into an empty place in his wife’s memory.  Greenwich Park.  A park!  That’s where the boy was killed.  A park — smashed branches, torn leaves, gravel, bits of brotherly flesh and bone, all spouting up together in the manner of a firework.  She remembered now what she had heard, and she remembered it pictorially.  They had to gather him up with the shovel.  Trembling all over with irrepressible shudders, she saw before her the very implement with its ghastly load scraped up from the ground.  Mrs Verloc closed her eyes desperately, throwing upon that vision the night of her eyelids, where after a rainlike fall of mangled limbs the decapitated head of Stevie lingered suspended alone, and fading out slowly like the last star of a pyrotechnic display.  Mrs Verloc opened her eyes.

Her face was no longer stony.  Anybody could have noted the subtle change on her features, in the stare of her eyes, giving her a new and startling expression; an expression seldom observed by competent persons under the conditions of leisure and security demanded for thorough analysis, but whose meaning could not be mistaken at a glance.  Mrs Verloc’s doubts as to the end of the bargain no longer existed; her wits, no longer disconnected, were working under the control of her will.  But Mr Verloc observed nothing.  He was reposing in that pathetic condition of optimism induced by excess of fatigue.  He did not want any more trouble — with his wife too — of all people in the world.  He had been unanswerable in his vindication.  He was loved for himself.  The present phase of her silence he interpreted favourably.  This was the time to make it up with her.  The silence had lasted long enough.  He broke it by calling to her in an undertone.

“Winnie.”

“Yes,” answered obediently Mrs Verloc the free woman.  She commanded her wits now, her vocal organs; she felt herself to be in an almost preternaturally perfect control of every fibre of her body.  It was all her own, because the bargain was at an end.  She was clear sighted.  She had become cunning.  She chose to answer him so readily for a purpose.  She did not wish that man to change his position on the sofa which was very suitable to the circumstances.  She succeeded.  The man did not stir.  But after answering him she remained leaning negligently against the mantelpiece in the attitude of a resting wayfarer.  She was unhurried.  Her brow was smooth.  The head and shoulders of Mr Verloc were hidden from her by the high side of the sofa.  She kept her eyes fixed on his feet.

She remained thus mysteriously still and suddenly collected till Mr Verloc was heard with an accent of marital authority, and moving slightly to make room for her to sit on the edge of the sofa.

“Come here,” he said in a peculiar tone, which might have been the tone of brutality, but was intimately known to Mrs Verloc as the note of wooing.

She started forward at once, as if she were still a loyal woman bound to that man by an unbroken contract.  Her right hand skimmed slightly the end of the table, and when she had passed on towards the sofa the carving knife had vanished without the slightest sound from the side of the dish.  Mr Verloc heard the creaky plank in the floor, and was content.  He waited.  Mrs Verloc was coming.  As if the homeless soul of Stevie had flown for shelter straight to the breast of his sister, guardian and protector, the resemblance of her face with that of her brother grew at every step, even to the droop of the lower lip, even to the slight divergence of the eyes.  But Mr Verloc did not see that.  He was lying on his back and staring upwards.  He saw partly on the ceiling and partly on the wall the moving shadow of an arm with a clenched hand holding a carving knife.  It flickered up and down.  Its movements were leisurely.  They were leisurely enough for Mr Verloc to recognise the limb and the weapon.

They were leisurely enough for him to take in the full meaning of the portent, and to taste the flavour of death rising in his gorge.  His wife had gone raving mad — murdering mad.  They were leisurely enough for the first paralysing effect of this discovery to pass away before a resolute determination to come out victorious from the ghastly struggle with that armed lunatic.  They were leisurely enough for Mr Verloc to elaborate a plan of defence involving a dash behind the table, and the felling of the woman to the ground with a heavy wooden chair.  But they were not leisurely enough to allow Mr Verloc the time to move either hand or foot.  The knife was already planted in his breast.  It met no resistance on its way.  Hazard has such accuracies.  Into that plunging blow, delivered over the side of the couch, Mrs Verloc had put all the inheritance of her immemorial and obscure descent, the simple ferocity of the age of caverns, and the unbalanced nervous fury of the age of bar-rooms.  Mr Verloc, the Secret Agent, turning slightly on his side with the force of the blow, expired without stirring a limb, in the muttered sound of the word “Don’t” by way of protest.

Mrs Verloc had let go the knife, and her extraordinary resemblance to her late brother had faded, had become very ordinary now.  She drew a deep breath, the first easy breath since Chief Inspector Heat had exhibited to her the labelled piece of Stevie’s overcoat.  She leaned forward on her folded arms over the side of the sofa.  She adopted that easy attitude not in order to watch or gloat over the body of Mr Verloc, but because of the undulatory and swinging movements of the parlour, which for some time behaved as though it were at sea in a tempest.  She was giddy but calm.  She had become a free woman with a perfection of freedom which left her nothing to desire and absolutely nothing to do, since Stevie’s urgent claim on her devotion no longer existed.  Mrs Verloc, who thought in images, was not troubled now by visions, because she did not think at all.  And she did not move.  She was a woman enjoying her complete irresponsibility and endless leisure, almost in the manner of a corpse.  She did not move, she did not think.  Neither did the mortal envelope of the late Mr Verloc reposing on the sofa.  Except for the fact that Mrs Verloc breathed these two would have been perfect in accord: that accord of prudent reserve without superfluous words, and sparing of signs, which had been the foundation of their respectable home life.  For it had been respectable, covering by a decent reticence the problems that may arise in the practice of a secret profession and the commerce of shady wares.  To the last its decorum had remained undisturbed by unseemly shrieks and other misplaced sincerities of conduct.  And after the striking of the blow, this respectability was continued in immobility and silence.

Nothing moved in the parlour till Mrs Verloc raised her head slowly and looked at the clock with inquiring mistrust.  She had become aware of a ticking sound in the room.  It grew upon her ear, while she remembered clearly that the clock on the wall was silent, had no audible tick.  What did it mean by beginning to tick so loudly all of a sudden?  Its face indicated ten minutes to nine.  Mrs Verloc cared nothing for time, and the ticking went on.  She concluded it could not be the clock, and her sullen gaze moved along the walls, wavered, and became vague, while she strained her hearing to locate the sound.  Tic, tic, tic.

After listening for some time Mrs Verloc lowered her gaze deliberately on her husband’s body.  Its attitude of repose was so home-like and familiar that she could do so without feeling embarrassed by any pronounced novelty in the phenomena of her home life.  Mr Verloc was taking his habitual ease.  He looked comfortable.

By the position of the body the face of Mr Verloc was not visible to Mrs Verloc, his widow.  Her fine, sleepy eyes, travelling downward on the track of the sound, became contemplative on meeting a flat object of bone which protruded a little beyond the edge of the sofa.  It was the handle of the domestic carving knife with nothing strange about it but its position at right angles to Mr Verloc’s waistcoat and the fact that something dripped from it.  Dark drops fell on the floorcloth one after another, with a sound of ticking growing fast and furious like the pulse of an insane clock.  At its highest speed this ticking changed into a continuous sound of trickling.  Mrs Verloc watched that transformation with shadows of anxiety coming and going on her face.  It was a trickle, dark, swift, thin. . . . Blood!

At this unforeseen circumstance Mrs Verloc abandoned her pose of idleness and irresponsibility.

With a sudden snatch at her skirts and a faint shriek she ran to the door, as if the trickle had been the first sign of a destroying flood.  Finding the table in her way she gave it a push with both hands as though it had been alive, with such force that it went for some distance on its four legs, making a loud, scraping racket, whilst the big dish with the joint crashed heavily on the floor.

Then all became still.  Mrs Verloc on reaching the door had stopped.  A round hat disclosed in the middle of the floor by the moving of the table rocked slightly on its crown in the wind of her flight.